Chapter 7
SEVEN
“How did you sleep last night?” Blair asked, climbing onto an iron-and-wood chair-style stool at the kitchen island.
“Like a baby.” Emily poured her friend a cup of coffee and took a seat next to her. She didn’t mention waking a couple of times because she hadn’t slept well since she and Will had broken up. “The bedding was so luxurious.”
“I know. I video-called Rocko to show him how soft the sheets were so he could look forward to snuggling up in them when he gets here.” She giggled.
A hollow pang pelted Emily. She could go on normally, but out of nowhere, hopelessness from the loss of her old life would swarm her like bees. “I love how you two call each other all the time. Will never called me like that. Should it have been a sign?”
“Everyone’s different,” Blair said, leaning against the chair back of the barstool. “And phone calls don’t necessarily make a marriage.”
“Yeah but connecting with one another does.”
Blair took a drink from her mug, heaviness in her pause. “Rocko and I aren’t all roses either,” she said, her honesty lingering heavily in the air. “We haven’t been great since I lost the baby.”
“Really?” In all their coffee dates, Blair had never mentioned this.
“Yeah. He bounced back, but I’m still struggling. Every time he wants to get close to me physically, I can’t do it.”
“I’m so sorry. I had no idea you were dealing with that.”
“We used to be so flirty, unable to keep our hands off one another. Now, when he touches me, I flinch. And if I let him, all I can think about is how I could end up pregnant again, and I don’t know if I could survive losing another baby.”
“There are ways to ensure you won’t get pregnant unless you’re ready,” Emily offered.
Blair traced a vein of marbling on the slick countertop and then picked up her mug. “I know, but there’s also the loss of the baby that hangs over the moment, spoiling it.”
“Have you talked to him about it?”
Blair stared into the steaming dark liquid in her mug. “Of course. We talk about it all the time. I’m in therapy. But nothing seems to help. I know he needs intimacy, but I’m not in the right place to give him that.”
“Has he said how he feels?”
“He’s supportive, but I think it’s putting a strain on him. I know he wonders if he’ll ever get his wife back.”
“Morning.” Sienna came in, her attention on her phone. “I just talked to Tyson. He misses me and can’t wait to get here. I thought I was the one who was supposed to get all hormonal. He doesn’t even know about the baby yet and he’s got couvade syndrome.”
“What is that?” Emily asked with a huff of laughter.
“It’s a condition where the father experiences similar symptoms to pregnancy,” Blair said.
Emily’s mouth dropped open. “That’s a thing?”
Blair laughed and nodded, but her attention moved back to Sienna when her phone beeped. “Is he texting again already?” She batted her eyelashes playfully.
“No. It’s just weather alerts. A system’s forming off the coast.” Sienna set down her phone on the counter. “It’s still pretty far out to sea, though, so hopefully it won’t bring too much rain. That coffee smells divine. I wish I could have a cup.”
“I can make you a decaf,” Emily offered. “I brought some.”
“Don’t trouble yourself. I’ll have juice.” Sienna patted Emily’s shoulder and then air-kissed Blair.
Blair brightened as if their earlier conversation had never happened. Had she been putting on a brave face for all of them? Maybe she hadn’t recovered as much as it seemed.
Sienna reached into the fridge and grabbed the decanter of orange juice. “It better not get cloudy. I’m trying to get a tan while I still have my figure.”
“Maybe I should take a few sunny photos just in case the weather turns,” Blair said. “I don’t know if I’ll do anything with them… I’ve been trying to decide how to get back online.”
“Preserving the moment is actually a great idea,” Sienna said, pouring the juice.
“Why don’t we all get dolled up and pose for a few photos of the three of us to remember the trip?
All our lives are about to change irrevocably.
It’ll be the last time I’m thin, the last time Emily isn’t in the dating scene, and from the sound of it, this could possibly be the last time Blair is offline before she jumps back into the lion’s den of social media. ”
“I like that idea,” Blair said.
“This could also be a good exercise for you,” Sienna continued, rounding the island and pulling out the barstool on the other side of Blair. “Focus on your talents, something you haven’t been able to do in a while.”
“You direct us, Blair,” Emily said. “What should we wear?”
“Hm.” She tapped her lip, a sparkle in her eye. “Let’s go with casual elegance. Maybe a sundress or something.” She pushed her coffee mug away. “I’m kind of excited about this. Let’s go.”
They went upstairs and got ready. When they reconvened back in the kitchen, Blair and Sienna wore striped flowy dresses, while Emily had opted for flowers.
“Blair, you look like a magazine model with your oversized sun hat and glasses,” Emily said.
Blair gave a little spin.
Sienna sighed. “I’m jealous. I want a hat like that. But only if it makes me look as pretty as Blair.”
Waving off their compliments, Blair ushered them outside near the infinity pool, with her tripod tucked under one arm. She pursed her lips, as if taking stock of the surroundings. She put down her equipment, dragged the table over a few feet, and then lined up the chairs.
“Let’s start under the umbrella,” she said, setting up the tripod and getting the camera lined up.
“The light is perfect with the pool behind us.” She squinted at the view.
“Em, can you go in and make us fancy-looking drinks? Slice one of the oranges and add a few of the sprigs of mint Patrick left.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Emily went inside and opened the cabinets to browse the stemware for the trendiest cocktail glasses.
There were plenty of options: martini glasses with shells etched into the stems, wine goblets of all sorts, champagne flutes with beaded edges…
She settled on three flutes that had little glass starfish along the bottom.
Once she’d filled them with orange juice and lemonade, she prepared the garnishes.
Sienna was working on tipping the umbrella just slightly when Emily came out, balancing the three glasses.
“These are awesome.” Blair took over, scooting each drink into place.
“Now, Sienna, you sit here because your hair is the darkest, so we want the most sun on you. Plus, the light will shine off your gold strands and you’ll look stunning.
” She wagged a finger at the other chair.
“Emily, sit there, but lean in toward Sienna.”
Emily followed her lead while Blair set the timer on the camera.
She called out various poses, and the camera snapped stills of them.
As they became more comfortable being photographed, they relaxed, offering their best model poses.
Sienna leaned in front of Emily and made an impromptu and ridiculous sexy stance with one shoulder forward and her sultry lips on the rim of her drink just as the camera snapped.
Emily fell into a fit of giggles, the camera still going off.
“You might not want to keep these,” Emily teased.
“Why?” Sienna protested playfully before posing for a few more in similar fashion. “You don’t think they’re spicy?” Her eyebrows bobbed.
Blair giggled.
Emily made a face. “It looked like you were making out with your glass.” She laughed again as the camera snapped, once more catching them in their candid moment. “Blair, you need to be in the photos to keep us under control.” She beckoned Blair over.
“I beg to differ. I’m enough, aren’t I?” Sienna said, licking her glass again to their guffaws.
Blair reset the timer and then jumped into the picture before it went off, bouncing into her seat, tipping it backward. Emily and Sienna lunged on either side, attempting to steady the chair, all of them tumbling to the floor as the camera went off. They doubled over, guffawing and gasping for air.
“Something tells me these might not be social media worthy,” Sienna said, wiping tears of laughter as they helped each other up.
“That’s fine,” Blair said, righting her chair.
“This is more fun than getting that perfectly curated shot anyway.” She giggled and then sobered out of nowhere.
“I really don’t have a clue how I’m going to start posting again.
After all this time, do I just jump back in with beach and pool photos? What will I say?”
“Tell them you took a mental health break,” Emily said.
“She’s got a point,” Sienna added. “And that would make you look current and health conscious. Everyone’s worried about their mental state these days. You can make taking me time cool.”
“But everyone will ask where the baby is. I was going to do a big announcement, and I posted a ton of teasers about the gender. Then I went silent.” She tipped her head back toward the sun.
“I don’t even know if I want to be an influencer anymore.
I don’t have any ambition, really. All my excitement was wrapped up in being a mom, and now I feel like an empty shell of myself. ” She sat up.
Emily handed her one of the juice glasses.
“Sorry again,” Blair said, taking a drink and swallowing. “I ruin every moment.” She shook her head. “I know you both have your own issues to deal with.”
Sienna stood up and stomped her foot. “Stop apologizing every time you open up.” She waved her arms between the three of them. “I don’t know how many times we need to tell you that this is the place to do it. Yes, we have our own crap. But we want to support your crap too.”
Blair cracked a smile. “Thank you.”
Sienna plopped back in her chair. “This is a free space for crap.”
They stared at each other, the mood lightening.
“Let’s go down to the beach,” Emily suggested. “Maybe we can take a few photos there.”