Chapter 10 #2
As rain pattered against the windows, the women retreated to their rooms. Over the last hour, while getting dressed, combing her hair, and putting on her makeup, Emily had picked apart every moment of her and Will’s life together, trying to figure out the warning signs she’d missed.
It was true they’d gotten busy with work and remodeling plans, and they hadn’t been as romantic as they used to be, but was preoccupation grounds for this?
Why didn’t he ever say something? She’d have dropped everything to have a date night.
She’d have reorganized her time immediately to allow a candlelit dinner or a pizza in.
The question she kept coming back to, which she didn’t want to ask herself: Was she not enough?
Could this Lanie give him something she couldn’t?
Who was this woman? What were her likes and dislikes? Did Lanie have anything in common with her?
Emily grabbed her phone, opened her email, and stared at the signature form until the image blurred.
A part of her didn’t want to give Will the satisfaction of her compliance.
He and Lanie were stealing her life, and she was handing it over with a single signature.
His behavior was so erratic. One minute they were remodeling the kitchen, then he was selling the house, and now he’s buying it?
This was the same guy who took two weeks to change a burned-out lightbulb.
The night of their engagement came back to her and her stomach plummeted. He had been excited. That was the only time he acted spontaneously.
A knock on the door interrupted her ruminating.
“Come in.”
Blair poked her head inside. “Hey, I found a cool place for our outing today. Wanna go in a few minutes?”
“Yeah, I can come down right now.” She closed the screen without signing. Her future could wait a few more hours.
But as she took each step down the sprawling staircase, a quiet yearning to hold out as long as possible whispered to her.
Maybe Will would realize he’d made a terrible mistake and ask her to come back.
He’d break it off with Lanie, then they could go to couples’ counseling and spend the rest of their lives rekindling their romance.
Scenarios whirled in her mind as she dashed through the rain and climbed into Sienna’s car.
Blair put on the navigation. Music played, and Blair and Sienna made small talk in the front, but it only sounded like a faint hum behind the weight of hope for something Emily knew would never come to pass.
Why did she hope to rekindle something with someone who didn’t think enough of her to try?
Until now, she’d never seen Will as the spineless type, and even though she didn’t want to believe he was, the notion was pretty obvious.
How had she managed to get wrapped up in a life with someone like that?
It was a ding to her ego. Maybe this whole mess could’ve been avoided if she’d taken more time to actually get to know him on a deeper level.
She’d been so excited about the wedding and then house shopping and renovations and eventually planning for children that she hadn’t spent enough time digging into who Will was as a person.
Maybe he didn’t even really know. He’d rarely expressed strong interests in things; he’d always just gone along with whatever she planned.
She hadn’t really unpacked his core values.
Where did he see himself in ten years? Twenty?
How did he view his role in the family? Was he planning to be involved—would he go to school PTA meetings and father-child days?
What were his views on discipline and education?
She could go on and on with questions she didn’t have answers to.
And with every one, the fact that she might have brought this on herself by not knowing these answers pinched her chest.
“Here we are,” Sienna said as they pulled up in front of a small light-blue cottage.
Inside was an art studio just big enough for a long table full of containers with shards of brightly colored glass. While they each took a seat in front of an empty framed platform, a woman explained that they’d be using an adapted mosaic technique to create pictures with glass pieces.
“We have bins along the side here,” she said, waving a hand by the windows, “where you can cut your own pieces of glass…”
“We can take out our aggression with the glass cutters,” Sienna whispered, shaking her umbrella and setting it next to her chair. She side-eyed Emily.
“We also have beads, seashells, and other materials that you might want to use to enhance your design,” the woman continued.
“When you have the design just the way you’d like it, we pour resin on top to keep it all in place, and you can either pick up the finished piece tomorrow or have it mailed to you. ”
They thanked her and turned their attention to their platforms.
“You were quiet on the way here,” Sienna said. “Wanna dish?”
“Nothing new,” Emily replied. “I’m glad we’re here. I’m excited to focus on something entertaining and mind-consuming.” She forced herself into a bright smile, wanting nothing more than to leave her thoughts behind.
“What are you going to make?” Blair asked Emily as she floated her phone through the air, taking a video.
“I’m not sure yet. Maybe stripes of turquoise and navy like the water at the beach?”
“That’s a good idea,” Sienna said, fishing out a few pieces of ice-blue glass. “I might do an abstract.”
“These peachy pink pieces are pretty,” Blair said, standing up to peer into the bowl. “I might do an abstract design as well—maybe in this color and cream.” She snapped a photo inside the bowl.
Emily got up and went to the far wall with an empty supply cup.
She filled it with pearls, pink seashell pieces, and sparkly beads.
When she had enough to create her project, she took them back to the table and began to line the interior bottom platform of her frame with them, arranging each piece to appear like the white Gulf Coast sand.
From there, she added turquoise and dark blue and then some of the ice-blue Sienna had chosen for a sandbar effect.
As she placed each piece of glass, Emily considered where she’d put this little masterpiece when she got home.
Home—where did she want to live? She didn’t have to be close to Nashville for Will’s writing anymore.
She could get an apartment somewhere outside the city—maybe in Spring Hill or Franklin, where she could visit the farmers’ markets and spend long afternoons walking through the parks.
She didn’t need anything fancy, just a place where she could recover.
Her current apartment was small, but outside Nashville she might be able to afford a larger place.
The bedroom suite in the house was hers, so she’d get to take that with her, and Will would probably let her have the kitchen table, which was larger than the bistro set she had now.
She could get some new place mats and add cushions to the chairs.
It might take her a while to furnish a larger living room, but she could buy things a little at a time so she wouldn’t have to put anything on the credit card.
And this design could be her first piece of artwork.
Emily forced herself to believe that starting over could be therapeutic. And that perhaps she could learn from this. She refocused on lining up the colored sea-glass shards on her frame.
Sienna had created a beautiful starburst of oranges and yellows, and Blair’s creation looked like a peach-and-pearl-colored baby-blanket pattern.
Maybe Blair and Sienna should switch, Emily thought.
But she didn’t mention it. They were too happy, chatting and giggling as they selected their pieces.
Their lighthearted chatter lifted Emily’s spirits.
Who knew what the future held? If she could ever crawl out of the shock of the situation, the sky was the limit.