16. Lennon
CHAPTER 16
LENNON
Now
San Francisco, California
Walking out of that pantry with an erection to beat the band was…maybe not my finest moment. Thankfully, I managed to keep my head down and slip out of the Adler's mansion without notice. I felt a little bad leaving Breaker alone after everything I said, but I could not stay that close to him any longer. Not when he so clearly hates me. Not when I can't stop fucking loving him anyway.
I pull into the garage at the hotel I'm staying at in downtown San Francisco and trudge up to the room, avoiding all human contact on the way. I'm glad I had the foresight to book a room because I have zero desire to drive the thirty-ish miles to my place near Santa Clara.
I throw open the door and immediately start unbuttoning the stupid stiff dress shirt I'm wearing. Everything feels suffocating, like I haven't taken a full breath in hours. I slip out of my pants and underwear, and flop onto the bed, burying my face into the plush white pillows.
If I thought not knowing why Breaker has pulled away from me this year was bad, the truth is so much worse. It would be so easy to be mad at him right now, to blame him for the shift in our relationship, but it's all on me. If only I had just been a little brave. If I had only voiced my feelings. If I'd just leaned in that night in Houston and pressed my lips to his like I so badly wanted to, we might not be in this position. Sure, Breaker isn't completely innocent in all of this, and he has been treating me like shit for weeks — hell, for a fucking year — but it all comes back to me.
I groan into the pillow, kicking my feet at the edge of the bed and pounding the mattress with my fists as I try to expel some of the excess energy coursing through me. My dick is painfully hard trapped between me and the mattress, but I refuse to give in to the temptation to stroke it. It doesn't feel right to relieve the tension when I know the only thing on my mind will be Breaker's pouty pink mouth, his peachy ass in the black slacks he wore tonight, the way his erection felt pressed up against my thigh in that dark pantry…
Fuck.
I bolt up, stomping my way into the bathroom and turning the shower on. I step in and shiver as the icy cold water pelts my skin. I run a hand through my hair and try to regulate my breathing, but Jesus Christ it's cold in here. I feel my teeth start to clatter, and I swear I can feel my skin turning blue.
"Dammit!" I yell as I quickly shut off the water and grab a towel. The stupid hotel sized towel is not meant for a body my size, so it does little to relieve the chill in my bones. I run back into the room and dive under the covers, pulling the duvet over my wet head to try to gain some warmth in my body.
I'd like to call science and demand a refund, because this whole 'cold shower to wash away sexual tension' thing is a total farce. Now instead of being warm and hard, I'm cold as fuck and hard. It's such bullshit.
I hear my phone buzzing on the dresser across the room, but I can't be fucked to get up and check it. I don't know how much time has passed since I curled up in this bed. It can't be that late, though. It was only around 9 when I left the party. Theoretically I should be exhausted after all the practice and playing and travel. I'm typically a zombie when I have time off during the season. Unfortunately, no matter how hard I try, I can't force myself to sleep. I toss and turn, cursing myself for letting my wet hair drip all over and soak the pillows. I get up and check the closet for extra pillows. When I don't find any, I consider calling down to the front desk. I hate to bother the hotel employees, but I can't sleep on a drenched pillow.
I pull the pants and boxer briefs that were abandoned on the ground over my ass, because calling the front desk while naked feels a little perverted to me. As I make my way to the phone, there's a knock at the door.
I pause, turning towards the door. Did I order room service and forget? That can't be right. I know I'm tired, but I'm not that tired.
I grab my pants and hop each leg into them as I cross the room. I look through the peephole, and lo and behold, there is Breaker. I can see how pink his cheeks are, even through the fishbowl lens of the peephole. He looks like he's shifting his weight from foot to foot and he keeps glancing around the hallway.
I don't even stop to try to figure out how the hell he knew exactly where to find me before I'm ripping open the lock and throwing the door open wide. There's no time to think when everything I want and everything I need is standing on the other side of this door.
I keep my mouth shut as he pulls his lower lip between his teeth, looking up at me through his thick black lashes from the hallway. We stare at each other for a moment before I step back, motioning with my arm for him to enter the room. He takes a step through the doorway and I let go of the door, letting it slowly close and latch behind me.
"B," I sigh, not knowing what to say. I turn to face him and apparently, I don't need to say anything. Instinct takes over and I reach my hand out to him, wanting to touch him, feel him, hold him close.
He takes the hint and then some, and in one second my back is pushed up against the door and Breaker's lips are crashing into mine. I'm stunned, stuck in place with my mouth sealed shut and my arms limp at my sides, but only for a moment. My brain quickly catches up to my mouth and I'm kissing him back, our lips tangling in a dance that we seem to instinctively know the steps to. His hands come up to cup my face, and I wrap my arms around his waist. He feels…
Different. Good. Like coming home after a long and exhausting day. He feels like exactly where I want to be.
His stubble scratches at my face, igniting my nerves in a way I've never felt before. I take my hands off of him, moving them so that I can grip his hips under his sports coat instead. The hard planes of his muscled torso feel like blue flames licking at my palms. His tongue runs over my bottom lip and I whimper into his mouth, opening up to explore him further. I always imagined that kissing Breaker would feel like a fight for dominance both of us clawing for control, but I am putty in his hands. He overpowers me in the most glorious way, claiming my mouth with his teeth and his tongue. I dig my fingers into his flesh and pull him closer, and as soon as our hips are flush I can feel his hardness rubbing against my thigh. I can't hold back my moan, and Breaker pulls away quickly.
"Fuck, Lennon," he says, turning and running his hand through his thick hair. I come up behind him, my hands working to pull his jacket over his shoulders as I nuzzle into his neck. Even with his palpable hesitation, he subtly leans into my touch.
“I can't stop my mind from racing. I can't stop thinking that this is all insane. I keep thinking?—”
"Don't think, baby. Let's not think. Let's not talk," I whisper against his ear before I place a soft kiss on the lobe, and he groans. "No more talking. Not tonight. We've been hurting for so long, and I'm sick and tired of it. I don't want to hurt anymore. I want to feel good. I want to make you feel good. Can we do that, B? Can we try to make each other feel good?" He pauses for a second, and then he's tearing off his shirt. Buttons fly everywhere as he turns and wraps his arms around my neck, swallowing my mouth whole with his kiss. I run my own hands down the sides of his body to his firm, muscled ass.
Breaker surprises me by using his leverage to hop onto me, his legs circling my waist like a sloth clinging to a tree branch. His bare chest is pressed against mine, and we're all skin and hands and tongue as I walk us over to the bed. I place him down gently, and I watch his eyes track my movements as I unbutton my pants, pushing them over my hips but leaving my underwear on. He does the same, tossing his pants to the side and inching up the bed to rest his head on the still wet pillow. I climb over him, caging his body between mine and the mattress, the same position I had him in in the pantry, just horizontal. I'm careful as to not push my full weight onto him. I want to make him come, not crush him to death. I lean down and he meets me halfway with a soft kiss.
"You'll tell me what to do?" I ask, trying and failing to mask my nerves. I've spent hours and hours imagining Breaker underneath me like this, the ways I could touch him, feel him, taste him. I know I want to be intimate with him. There's absolutely no question about that, but I still feel a bit like a helpless virgin. He reaches up and cups my cheek, and I rest it against his warm, calloused palm.
"Have you done this before?" he asks. Not a judgmental question, but curious. Like he just wants to gauge where I'm at.
"I've explored a bit alone. Ya know, online research," I feel my cheeks go red hot under his touch. "But not with another man. Not when I've only wanted you."
"Lennon," he sighs out with a smile. "I've got you. Roll over to your side." I do, and he follows. I expect him to touch me again, maybe push me over and lay on top of me, but he surprises me by tucking both of his hands under the pillow, cradling his head while his eyes meet mine in a heated gaze.
"Hi, Len," he says, just barely above a whisper.
"Hey, B," I answer, mirroring his movements and putting my hands under my own pillow.
He pulls that pretty bottom lip between his teeth again as his eyes start to roam all over my body. I see his throat bob when they land on my cock, hard and straining against the dark grey fabric of my boxer briefs. He looks back up at me, and I give him a knowing smirk. We stare into each other's eyes for a moment, the room growing hotter and hotter with each passing second. I can feel the electricity sizzle and crack between us, and as tempted as I am to reach out and touch him, there's something delicious about this agonizing anticipation.
"Is this real?" he asks, his voice shaking with what I'm choosing to believe is excitement.
"I really fucking hope so, baby," I whisper, my eyes zeroing in on his pink, plump lips.
'Baby' seems to be the trick to break the tension, because Breaker flings himself at me, pushing me on my back and crawls over me, the opposite of how I had him under me just a moment ago. Unlike myself, Breaker has no qualms about pushing his bodyweight down on my body, and I have no problem taking it. He leans down, attacking my lips with a searing open mouth kiss, our bodies lining up perfectly for the friction I'm praying he grants me soon. He sucks my tongue into his mouth and my hips buck, pushing our hard cocks together. Breaker groans and grinds down on me, and I swear to god I have to put all of my focus into not embarrassing myself because I'm already two seconds away from coming. My hands trace lines up and down his sides, my short nails lightly scratching at his skin.
"Lennon," he moans against my jaw as he begins peppering kisses down my beard and over my throat. His teeth scrape over the sensitive flesh of my neck as he works his hips in another slow but rough stroke on top of me, and my hands fly to his chest, pushing him up.
"Was that not okay?" he asks, worry dancing in his eyes as I take a few calming breaths.
"It was so much more than okay, baby. I just need to slow down. I want this to last, and you have me ready to blow already." The anxiety leaves his face and he gives me a cocky half smile.
"I think I know something we could do that would make us both very happy," he says, his fingertip toying with the waistband of my underwear. "If you're willing to take these off."
"Yes, yes, oh my god, yes. Take them off, B," I beg and he giggles, shaking his head.
"So eager," he works his way down the bed, pulling the underwear with him. I lift my hips so that he can tug them down further, and when he frees my erection, it hits my belly, hard and heavy. I'm aching to stroke it, but I need to know what he has planned. He stands from the bed, turning so that I can see his perfect ass as he bends and removes his own briefs. I push up onto my elbows so I can see him better. He's all thick body hair and tight, round muscles. I want to crawl over and take a bite out of one of those juicy cheeks.
I watch as he bends over and rifles through his pants, and I'm grateful for his boy scout tendencies when I realize he's looking for supplies. He finds what he's looking for he turns back to me, and my mouth waters at the sight of him. Gorgeous face, strong pecs, abs that could cut glass and a line of black hair that starts at his belly button and trails down to the place where he is lazily stroking himself, watching me watch him.
"Enjoying the view?" he teases as he runs his thumb over the tip of his cock.
"I really, really am, but I think I'd enjoy your touch a lot more. Come back to me?" I whine, and he winks, tossing a packet onto the bed next to me and stalking his way back over top of me with all the grace of a jungle cat hunting it's prey. He straddles my thighs and starts to run his hands over my stomach and my hips.
"You're leaking, honey," he says, swiping a finger through the small pool of precum that has begun to gather under my belly button. He takes the same finger and sucks it into his mouth and I grit my teeth.
He is…
So.
Fucking.
Sexy.
He picks up the packet and rips it open with his teeth. I'm too lost in the lust to pay much attention to what he's doing. I hiss when he starts to dribble the cool lubrication over my dick. My eyes fly open when his hand wraps around me, giving me one long, slow pull up.
"You're so beautiful, Len. Can you touch yourself for me? I want to watch." He wets his lips as he stares down at where his hand is wrapped around me.
I groan. I don't want to do it myself. I don't want to lose the pure bliss of his tight grip on my shaft, but I don't want to disappoint him, either. I take my cock from his hold and squeeze it hard, hoping to stave off the orgasm that has been building in my bones for what feels like hours, days, fucking years. Breaker's eyes glaze over as he watches me slowly and deliberately work my hand up and down my length.
"You have such nice hands, honey. They're so big and strong. They feel rough and soft at the same time. Do you think they can handle more?" He leans over so that he is hovering me again, his chest a mere inches from mine. I nearly jump out of my skin when I feel the head of his cock nudge at the place where my hand is wrapped around myself.
"Open up your grip a little bit. Take me with you, Len. Make us feel so good," He whispers against my neck, and I loosen the hold I have on myself, allowing his dick to slide in against mine. The first feel of his velvety skin, slick with lube and precum rubbing against my own dick is so intense, my eyes snap shut and I bite my tongue, desperate for the pain to offset some of the overwhelming pleasure shooting through my every nerve. He starts to fuck and grind against me and I grip us tight, tight, so fucking tight. The pressure of my hand, his hips and his smooth, silky cock fucking into my fist against my own has my head spinning.
"God, baby," I grit out through clenched teeth. "You feel so fucking amazing. Not gonna last. Holy shit I'm not gonna last." He bucks his hips and drops his lips to the shell of my ear.
"Jack us fast, honey. Hot and fast. Make us come. I want it all over you. I want you to drench my cock in your cum." He sucks my earlobe into his mouth, and it's my undoing.
My orgasm hits me like a tractor trailer, slamming into me with the force of a thousand suns. My balls draw up tight and my toes grind into the bed as I coat my hand and our stomachs in rope after rope of thick cum. Fireworks explode behind my eyes, and I can't see. I'm blinded by the pleasure. I can't move. I can't think. Somewhere in the distance I can hear myself panting and groaning, but it's like my head is under water, right at that blissful rush of breathlessness. I'm lost to sensation in a way I've never been before.
Thank god Breaker has the sense to take over, pistoning his hips and fucking my fist faster and faster as I come down from my own high. I'm still riding out the waves of intensity when Breaker's swollen crown passes over my own and an almost painful aftershock of pleasure courses through me. It bolts down my body through my too-sensitive dick as Breaker shudders above me, finding his own release. His warm release coats my skin, our shared pleasure mixing together between us. Breaker doesn't hesitate to drop himself onto my chest and grab at my face with both hands, pulling my lips into desperate, thankful kisses. The kind of kisses that feel like prayers and whispered promises, my name a symphony of praise on his tongue.
I bask in it, lying back and taking every bit of affection he is so willingly offering me. I don't know what just happened. I don't know if it will ever happen again. I just know that if Breaker owned a piece of my soul before, the whole fucking thing belongs to him now.
For now, I'm content to lie here in the afterglow with my best friend — my lover — glued to my skin.