Chapter Nine
Buck
I wasn’t sure what I needed to say or do when we loaded into Cliff’s little car that morning. He seemed content with driving, loading up a bunch of his things as we made our way south to my territory.
We’d stalled in the days before, while I pretended to be his witch’s husband in order to secure some sort of social security funding. We also cast a preserving spell over the body to make it seem like he was freshly dead the day before I left. And for all intents and purposes, he looked pretty fucken’ dead. Freshly so for something I’d dug up as a half skeleton not days prior. Then again, not much was out of the hands of gods when we put our minds to it.
The GPS said we had six more hours to go, even as the noonday sun rose high in the sky and Jacque napped peacefully on my lap between bouts of wanting to run between all the windows to bark at traffic. “Has anyone informed your hare that he’s not a dog?” As if on cue, the little bunny’s tail wagged a few times with interest.
“I tried telling him that at one point or another but he doesn’t listen.” Cliff shrugged hard and refocused on the road. I’d offered to drive, but he refused, eyes focused ahead and mind a buzz with worries I couldn’t comprehend.
“Just wait until you meet Rayne’s cock,” I said, chuckling. Cliff choked out a sound in retort and glanced at me disbelievingly before refocusing on the road. I knew better than to distract more, so I kept quiet.
“It’s a rooster, right?”
“Pecker.”
“For fuck’s sake, that doesn’t make it better, Buck.” His admonishment brought me great joy, the spite and chaos in him, everything I’d found endearing about Rayne but with a physical form that made my cock burn with interest.
“Rayne has a pet rooster who is a bantam cockerel named Pecker,” I said. The reiteration seemed to please him. He grumbled but made no further comment as we passed some roadside sign for the world’s biggest something or other advertised on the roofs of barns for miles around.
“What about his boyf—husba—mate?” Cliff struggled with the words as I leaned back to stroke Jacque’s ears, slicking them down his back with a chittering bunny purr. His eyes bugged a little, which felt something like the bruxing rats did.
“Storm is a good god. Far better than I, at least.” I smiled as Jacque increased his chittering.
“Easy there. We probably should pull over. That’s his ‘I need to stretch my legs or someone’s getting bit’ noise.” Cliff put his turn signal on to bring the car to a slow crawl on the highway’s edge.
I tended to believe him, seeing as Jacque’s mind was fairly scattered and hard to understand without his buttons and Cliff’s influence.
Cliff seemed to understand him at any rate. He snapped a lead onto Jacque’s harness the moment we came to a stop and slid free of the vehicle, allowing me the privilege of carrying the rabbit into the tall grass.
“Hold up.” Cliff gestured for me to hold Jacque while he marched over toward the grass and kicked around, frowning. Whatever he saw pleased him, so he gestured for me to release Jacque to hop about, nibbling at grass.
“Checking for snakes?” I raised a brow, but Cliff shook his head.
“Checking for broadleaf weeds. Making sure the area hasn’t been sprayed with pesticides.” He scrutinized the grass in a way I’d not thought to. I wondered, idly, if I’d have noticed. Earth wasn’t my calling quite as much as stone. My love for the earth lay a little lower, near impenetrable with hardness and force. Stones. It seemed my mate cared for the ground itself, the soil and wonder.
Satisfied, he leaned back against the small SUV, arms crossed as I held Jacque’s leash. I didn’t think I needed the restraint, as the hare was marginally intelligent, but I stood steadfast. This creature was my mate’s pride and joy, his companion through much.
Unusual for a hare, Jacque found a convenient spot to relieve himself, exhibiting admirable control over his functions. Though, with the presence of a litter box in Cliff’s apartment, I shouldn’t have been surprised. So, when he completed his mission, he pawed about in the grass, nibbling a few fresh blades before traipsing up to me with a self-satisfied sneeze.
Cliff rummaged in the back of his mini-SUV, pulling out a water bottle with a beaded tube to it. He offered it down to Jacque to give him some sips, which he accepted easily, like he’d done it a thousand times before.
“He’s done this before.” I stared at the hare and stepped back when he was done, ready to forage the weeds once more for tasty nibbles.
“A few times. We used to go and visit my parents a few times a year.” Cliff’s expression morphed into something sad for a moment before it faded. I wasn’t sure what was expected of me, but my time with Rayne had let me know that his parents were not the attentive sort.
“My mother’s affections are distant and limited. I treasure any glimpse I get of her. From her, I was born of two mountains clashing, and they never spoke to me. Perhaps it is not in the nature of some to be as warm and loving as we would like. I would like to think I would do better if I ever—we ever—make a child.” I hesitantly gave him a glance and found his twisted expression slightly amusing.
“We’ve got a bunny child! He’s happy being an only child!” Cliff gestured at Jacque, who gave me a perplexed yet walleyed stare.
Right…
“When your next heat comes, we will abstain again. I don’t mind being the object of your affections.” I offered a half smile to him and raked him up and down with my gaze. His cheeks reddened in response.
“Never done that before. Or the other way…” He cleared his throat and stretched while Jacque sniffed about, doing his business and nibbling some scraggly clover that grew wild in the area. “But that’s good, right? Like, I’m not all used up.”
I hesitated as those last few words left his mouth. “Used. Up?”
“Like I’m not all worn out, used… I haven’t been with a thousand guys or girls. You know? Nobody but you… So like…” He shrugged, that confident posture his body had all but melted away.
“Like I took something from you when I touched you?” I gripped onto Jacque’s leash and stared at my hand, the earthen tones a testament to the Olmec people I had chosen this form from. “Do you feel soiled by me?”
All the blood on my hands. All the lives I’d taken, consumed, and relished. Did it leave me as nothing but a tainted black spot that marked my own mate?
“No. I mean. It’s gross, isn’t it? Sex with someone who’s been with— You’ve been with people.” His voice wavered, and he wiped at his face before turning away from me, his nerves clear.
Jacque barked at Cliff and rushed over, pawing at his leg before giving me a stern glare and a garbled swear through his staticky thoughts. I was certain he’d push the little buttons later to let me know exactly how he felt.
“Am I defiled?” My heart sank in my chest, a sudden embarrassment flowing through me. I’d heard of such beliefs, but to think Rayne’s brother held that sort of thought?
“I—I don’t know. I don’t,” he said, voice cracking as he shuddered with a sob.
Ahh, post heat hormones coming down.
“Well, if you’re worried about disease, it’s not too often I go a day without changing my body, let alone any time long enough for a disease to take hold.” I bent low to scoop Jacque into my arms and ushered Cliff closer to his vehicle. “And if it’s my heart, know that I’ve never carried someone in mine like I will carry you.”
Cliff stifled a half sob and turned toward me, taking Jacque into his arms before pushing his face into my chest. “I never wanted to… I can’t be. That was Rayne’s thing, not mine! I should—I should like women, should—”
“Why?” It was the only thing I could think to ask. Why did it matter that he liked one thing or the other? I knew things had changed. I knew some people had issues with it, had made Cliff feel like he should have reservations.
“Because I’m not—I’m… I don’t look gay . I don’t sound gay . I don—” Cliff ran a hand through his hair and took a shaking breath, leaning into the side of his SUV as he stumbled back. I cut him off by pinching his defined chin, sinking my thumb into his dimple there. He swallowed hard, that prominent bulge in his throat moving with a wavering note of fear.
“What does gay look like? What does gay sound like?” I leaned in to brush my lips over his ear. “Do I look gay? Do I sound gay?” I pinched my fingers tighter, keeping him from turning his head away. I gave him a gentle nudge, refocusing his spinning mind.
“No.” His breath shuddered.
“Then what is gay? You just seem to not want to be part of a culture or element of the lifestyle. That’s fine.” I brushed my nose along the shell of his ear, inhaling his gentle scent. For all his fear, my presence had arousal budding, masking worry, and worse. “And I told you. You’re mine .”
His breath hitched, and posture sagged. “Rayne is— He’s gonna make fun of me.”
“There’s no shame in being loved by a god. And it may bring you some joy to know your brother only recently gave birth. He has no ground to stand on.” I laughed and nipped his ear, relishing his tremble and hitching breath.
“Was he big and fat at least?” Cliff stifled a breath as I ran a hand up his side, fingertips lifting the hem of his shirt to brush his skin as earthen toned as the light stones of the cliffs that came to mind when I thought of his name. The warmth that exuded from his flesh.
“And miserable. And his mate loved every moment of it. And if we try for a child, when we feel like it, if we ever, you’ll be loved every moment of it.” I slid my hands around his waist and cupped him to me, halting as I opened my mouth to nuzzle down and suck his neck as a sharp bark broke the moment.
Jacque.
“Once we’re someplace with a bed, then…” I pulled away from a trembling Cliff. And took the keys from his pocket. “You hold Jacque for a while. You’re unsteady, so I’ll drive.”
He melted into my order and nodded before taking Jacque’s leash and picking him up. The strange hare fidgeted to get onto his back like a baby in Cliff’s arms and chittered happily.
“Wait, are we getting a hotel or something, or are we staying with Rayne and his boyf—husband?” Cliff hesitated.
“Mate, and I’m sure we can borrow an empty house in the packlands or something. That won’t guarantee any privacy as far as the wolves are concerned though.” I shrugged. When hearing was that good, people learned to ignore enthusiastic fucking.
“Wolves… Like wolves that would eat Jacque?” His eyes widened, and I smiled.
“If Jacque is a friend, they will leave him alone. I promise.” I guided him back into the car to hook in and at the heralding click of the seat belt, I leaned over to place a little kiss on his trembling lips. As I withdrew, I trailed my fingers over his solid jawline and offered Jacque a little headbutt of acknowledgement that satisfied the creature. I enjoyed the gentle rasp of Cliff’s skin on my fingertips, reassurance the presence with me was firm, masculine, and heartier. Cliff would be one I could feel secure with. He would keep up with me, built with the natural sporty physique of the males I preferred in my younger days.
He turned his head away, cheeks pinkening. “Promise me he’ll be safe?”
“I promise you he’ll be safe. And you’ll be safe, too.” I started the vehicle and pulled onto the highway, content with myself. “Because if you aren’t, I’ll go with you.”