Chapter eighteen Scottie #2
I just wanted some time to let things sink in.
I get him wanting to make decisions and expect answers from me, but the truth is, I’m coming up with the answers as I go right now.
For once in my life, I’m trying not to think too hard about the future—even though our daughter will be here in less than four months, and I need to have some idea of what our life is going to look like before then.
Once we’re all clean and dressed, we settle into my bed. Grady leans back against my headboard while I rest my head in his lap, facing the television. And this moment—it feels so normal, so natural, like this is what things between us should be like.
But how long until it goes sour? Can just being near someone always feel this soothing, or is it inevitable that feelings change over time?
I don’t know anyone in my life who’s had a relationship or marriage last, especially not happily. Grady and I aren’t married, but I’m sure he’d want that one day, and the last thing I want is for us to end up resenting one another down the road.
I just don’t see how that could happen, given how strongly I feel about this man and how different those feelings are from what I felt with Andrew.
But can I really trust and believe that this won’t end in turmoil like it did for me the last time?
My heart says yes, but my head is still protesting the idea, trying to keep me safe, trying to make me cautious.
And the only thing holding us together right now is sex.
What happens when that’s off the table? Will this man even still want me after he sees what childbirth is like and what it does to my body?
“Grady…”
“Yeah, babe?”
“What happens when our daughter gets here?”
He brushes my hair from my face. “What do you mean?”
“Well, in a few months I’m going to be as big as a house and probably won’t want sex anymore. And after I deliver, I can’t have sex for at least six weeks.”
His brows furrow as he stares down at me. “Where is this coming from?”
“I don’t know,” I say, tracing circles on the comforter beneath me, hoping he can’t see how unnerved I feel at the moment. God, being a woman sucks sometimes. There’s never a quiet moment in our minds. “I just figure once sex is off the table, you won’t…”
He presses a finger to my lips, stopping me mid-sentence. “Don’t even say another word.” I gulp down my reply, waiting for him to continue. “Do you honestly think that the only reason I’m here is for sex?”
“Well, no, but…”
He pulls me up and guides me to his lap, our daughter resting between us. “Scottie Daniels…”
“I’m not Daniels anymore.”
He fixes me with a glare. “I’m sure as fuck not calling you by another man’s name when you’re carrying my baby.
” My clit twitches from that comment. “But you will always be Scottie Daniels to me, until you take my last name,” he declares, making my heart race even harder.
He sighs, taking in a deep breath before continuing.
“Scottie Daniels, will you go on a date with me?”
I nearly laugh because that was the last thing I was expecting to come out of his mouth. “What?”
Our eyes lock. “I want to take you on a proper date, Scottie. We never did that, and if I hadn’t been so wrapped up in baseball back in high school, I would have asked you then.
But you know how that all worked out. And now, even though we’re already having a kid together, it seems you need to be reminded that I want more with you.
Maybe I should just show you—if you’ll let me, that is. ”
My lips curl up into a smile that burns my cheeks, and suddenly a wave of relief and excitement washes over me. “You want to take me on a date?”
“That’s what I said, baby.”
“When?”
“How about next weekend?”
Gnawing on my bottom lip, I take a moment to contemplate his proposition. Yet, deep down, I know this is Grady’s way of demonstrating what I need to see and hear. And if ever there was a sign that I should keep trusting this man, this is it. “Okay.”
He buries his hands in my hair, bringing my mouth to his. “Good girl. See? You just need to follow your heart, Scottie. It’s trying to speak to you. I just wish you would listen.”
“My head keeps getting in the way.”
“Well, tell it to knock it the fuck off.”
I bark out a laugh. “It’s not that easy. I’ve spent most of my adult life overthinking, Grady. It’s going to take time to change that.”
When his lips touch mine again, my entire body warms from head to toe. “At least you’re trying, Scottie. That’s all I ask. And soon, you’ll realize you don’t have to carry the mental load alone because I’m here, and I’m not letting you go again. No way in hell.”
***
“Don’t let them get in your head, Chase!” Grady yells from the dugout, trying to help calm my son who currently has a runner on each base. The Carrington Cove High School baseball team is down by three runs at the top of the seventh inning, but it’s still anyone’s game.
Chase hasn’t been playing his best, though, and as a parent, there are few things worse than watching your kid deal with immense pressure and not being able to do much about it.
“You’ve got this, Chase!” I scream from my seat in the bleachers. I would stand, but this baby girl is putting a ton of pressure on my sciatic nerve lately, so sitting is just a better option so my legs don’t give out on me.
“Timeout!” Grady calls to the umpire, who nods his head and echoes the call.
I blow out a breath, watching Grady walk toward my son, hoping he can give him the words of encouragement he needs right now. Biting my nails, I watch the two of them as my daughter does somersaults in my belly.
“I know, peanut. Big brother’s got this, though.” I rub a few circles around the spot where I feel her. “When you’re old enough to understand how nerve-racking this is, I’ll remind you of this moment.”
Grady pats Chase on the shoulder and then heads back to the dugout, straightening his ball cap while popping a fresh stick of gum in his mouth.
God, he’s so fucking hot. Tonight, I’m gonna make him keep that hat on him while I ride him.
I push away my dirty thoughts and focus back on my son as he stands on the mound again, looking more calm and in control. He goes to wind up the pitch, but the runner on third gets a little too far off base, so Chase hammers the ball to the third baseman, who tags the runner out.
“Yes, Chase! Great job!” I scream, clapping my hands wildly. Chase gets the ball back and goes back to waiting for the call from the catcher. After two shakes, he gives a nod and then winds up and throws the pitch, striking the batter out at the plate.
I can see his grin from here, so whatever Grady said to him was exactly what he needed to hear.
Unfortunately, the boys still lose 7-6, but my son walks out of the dugout proud, and he should be. He pitched one hell of a game.
As soon as I waddle over to him, he pulls me in for a hug. “Hey, Mom.”
“Hey, baby. You did great. I’m so proud of you.”
“I hate losing.”
“Can’t win them all, but you did amazing. You kept your cool under pressure, which is a sign of maturity and strength, honey.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
I reach up and push his hat from his face so I can see it, so gratified with the young man he’s becoming.
Our move to Carrington Cove may have started off rocky, but he’s changed so much and for the better, and I know it’s because of the man who entered our lives, the same one striding over to us right now.
Grady stretches his hand out to shake my son’s. “You did phenomenally, Chase,” he says, before turning to me. “Wouldn’t you say so?”
“I was just telling him that.”
“Thanks,” Chase says, his cheeks turning slightly pink.
Grady steps closer to him and lowers his voice. “You made me really fucking proud out there, kid. I’m honored to be your coach.”
Emotion clogs my throat instantly, watching this man talk to my son the way his own father should have.
Chase nods, his face stoic, before he puts his hat back on and then leans down to kiss my cheek. “I’m going to grab my bag and say bye to the guys.”
“Okay. Think about where you want to eat for dinner. Your choice,” I call out to him as he nods and then jogs over to the dugout.
I turn back to Grady, trying to keep my emotions in check. “So, how do you feel, Coach?”
He takes a deep breath. “Really fucking proud, Scottie. Even though we lost, I couldn’t have been prouder of how all of the boys played.”
“You should be.” Staring up at him, I continue, “Just out of curiosity, what did you say to Chase in the seventh inning when the bases were loaded?”
Grady grins. “That’s between him and me, Scottie.”
“That’s how you’re going to be? Really?”
“Yup.” He wraps his arm around my waist and guides me toward the gate that leads out to the parking lot. “I can’t tell you all of my winning moves.”
“How come?”
“Because the game isn’t over yet, and until it is, you keep some plays close to the vest.”