2. 6
“We were in French together in tenth grade,” she said.
His eyes widened. She knew he understood.
“It’s amazing what you can re-learn during a lunch period in the library, Monsieur poète maudit ,” she added. “You’re not so esoteric as you think you are. I had just blocked Baudelaire and his sad captive albatross out of my memory, that’s all.”
She reached for his hand. Held his fingertips in hers for a few moments. But the restaurant patrons looking out on them through the floor-to-ceiling windows prevented her from doing more.
He took her hand and led her back around the corner, to the alley behind the restaurant. He turned, and cupped her face in his hands. Kissed her, on the lips at first, but soon his lips traveled up her jawline to her earlobe, her neck. Hot and cold electric shocks reverberated through her body. His mouth, his tongue found their way back to hers. His hand nuzzled the small of her back. Slid down a little further, and pressed her hips into his. He touched and stroked her hair with his fingertips, as if it were something he had wanted to do for a very long time.
“Don’t go,” he whispered into her ear when her break was over.
“I have to,” she replied. “So do you. You’re late.”
He kissed her again. “When can I see you again?”
“I’m off tomorrow and Saturday.”
He shook his head. “I’m working.”
“Sunday’s the Halloween party,” she said ruefully. “I’m busy all that day, too.”
The look he gave her was pained, but he kissed her one more time. She smiled up at him, and held his hand until they got back inside.
The day of the party, Julia and Alison rode the bus to St. Francis Wood. Many other past and present Holy Cross students streamed into the house, which thumped all the way from the corner of the street with bass music from a Halloween party soundtrack.
“I predict an early crashing of this party by the cops,” Alison said cheerfully.
Julia and Alison filed inside and laughed at Holly, dressed as Rose from So I Married an Axe Murderer . They compared costumes with the other revelers they knew, couldn’t believe River Phoenix had died that morning either, and located the jello shots as quickly as possible. Sufficiently warmed, they made their way to the impromptu dance floor in the living room.
Somebody came up to Julia and said, “Some guy is looking for you out there.”
“Oh my God, it’s William,” said Alison, seizing Julia’s arm.
“Where? ”
“I don’t know where. But what other guy would be looking for you here?”
Julia smacked her and craned her neck to look for him. “Come with me,” she said to Alison, afraid of losing her in this dark, thumping, teeming mass of costumed humanity.
They went back together to the hallway, where she spotted him, hanging back, looking ready to escape out the front door. She beamed and waved, working her way through the crowd until he finally spotted her. When he did, his eyes gave another one of those involuntary flickers down her body.
“Ariel!” exclaimed Alison, gesturing like a game show hostess at Julia’s mermaid skirt and clamshell bikini top.
“I’m not Ariel,” Julia protested. “I’m just a mermaid.”
“Ariel,” insisted Alison, tugging on Julia’s copper hair. “No wig needed.”
William remained frozen in place, his eyes riveted to Julia, apparently incapable of speech.
“I think he approves,” Alison observed aloud.
Reddening, William looked then to Alison, in her black wig with fringed bangs. “What are you?”
Alison whipped a kitchen knife and fake penis out of her waistband. “Lorena Bobbit?”
He cast her a dubious look, and turned back to Julia. At first she didn’t think he had come dressed as anything at all, but then she noticed the uncharacteristic black leather jacket and boots.
“I give up,” she said.
He opened his arms out to the side, as if to give her a better look. “Biker.”
Julia and Alison gaped a moment, then collapsed in a fit of giggles.
“That is the worst costume I’ve ever seen!” laughed Julia when she recovered her powers of speech.
He looked distinctly uncomfortable, and Alison exclaimed, “Oh, poor William! You conned him into coming here, and then you laugh at him! There’s got to be some way we can help him.”
Julia thought for a moment. “I have an idea, but it’s a long shot. Come with me. ”
She took William by the hand and led him through the gridlock of bodies toward the kitchen. When she looked back, she realized that she had lost her sister. Or, more likely, Alison had dropped her, quite deliberately.
It was less crowded and much quieter in the kitchen. Julia let go of his hand and rummaged through the ample cabinets.
“What are you doing?” asked William.
“Like I said, it’s a long shot,” was all the reply she would give. But after a minute or two, she located what she was looking for: a can of Crisco. “Bingo. Now for part two. This is even more of a long shot.” And yet, after a moment or two more, she found a set of food coloring. Beaming triumphantly, she held them up for him to see. “My sister is obviously not the only baker in the family.”
He eyed her warily. “What are you going to do with that?”
“Relax,” she said, cradling her finds in one arm and grabbing his hand again. They plunged into the masses, working their way through to the other side of the house, where she found the small bag she had stowed under a bench in the entry hall. Up the staircase she led him, past the bodies lining the darkened stairs, to what she knew was a guest bedroom. She opened it; it was occupied already.
“Oh, sorry,” she gasped, slamming it shut again. Jesus, why didn’t they use the lock? That’s when she realized what this must look like to him, and felt herself redden.
“Let’s do this in the hallway,” she suggested. There weren’t very many people there. She found a small desk in the hallway with a chair and pulled it out for him.
“Sit.”
He obeyed remarkably well, apparently too stunned to put up much resistance. She opened her bag, pulled out her eye shadow applicators. She used one to blend together a dab of Crisco with some black food coloring.
She brought the applicator toward his face. He pressed himself as far back into the chair as he could and demanded, “What are you going to do with that thing?”
“Impromptu Halloween face paint. You are going to be the biker from hell. ”
He tried to clamber out of his chair, but she steadied him with a hand on his shoulder.
“Will you just relax?” she pleaded. “You are looking at an accomplished Halloween costume and makeup artist of many years’ experience. How do you think I came across this costume I’m wearing? You won’t find another one exactly like it.”
“That’s true,” he conceded, sinking back into his chair.
She snickered, and he watched as she came forward, her face hovering inches away from his. His eyes locked on hers, wide like a startled animal, and intensely blue. They flitted involuntarily down her body, at the clamshells, her trim waist, the aqua mermaid skirt hugging her slender hips.
She cupped his chin in her hand and lifted his face. “Look at me.”
His eyes snapped immediately to her face. She came forward even closer with the eye shadow applicator, and he knocked her arm aside with his hand. She flinched, and he broke into nervous laughter.
“Oh, come on!” she laughed.
“There’s no way I’m letting you do that to me.”
But she was having too much fun watching him laugh. She came toward him again, and once again he blocked her. She tried switching hands, but he blocked that one as well.
By now they were both flushed red with laughter and exertion. When she reached toward him again, his hand closed around her forearm and held it there. So she reached out with her other arm, took the eye shadow applicator from her trapped hand, and brought it toward his face. He seized that forearm with his free hand and held both of her arms there.
Though he still smiled, he wasn’t laughing any more. Her laughter came only in spurts while she waited for his next move.
“Drop that thing,” he said, shaking her hand.
“No,” she said with a nervous laugh.
“Drop it,” he repeated, shifting himself forward in his seat. His hand crawled its way up her forearm to her hand. He pried open her fingers, and the eye shadow applicator tumbled to the floor.
Still, he held both of her arms there, his eyes flickering down her face to her mouth. He pulled her even closer, between his legs, and his lips were on hers. He let go of her arms, and put his hands on her rib cage.
After a moment, he broke away to look into her eyes. She put her forehead against his, and he stroked the side of her face. Kissed her lips again, and again.
Her heart was pounding now, and he pulled her down into his lap. It didn’t matter anymore that people milled all around them; she let him crush his mouth into hers, kiss her deeply. Let his hands slide along the bare skin of her torso, her arms, her shoulders.
“Let’s go into one of the rooms,” he whispered into her ear. She shook her head, and he whispered, “I just want to lay down with you.”
Her mouth twisted into a wry smile. “Will, I’m sitting in your lap, and I can tell that you don’t just want to lay down with me.”
With a mortified look, he said, “I’m sorry.”
But she stroked his hair and laughed so good-naturedly that he couldn’t stay embarrassed. He touched her lip with his thumb, and she opened her mouth and let him skim his tongue over hers again. He rested his forehead against hers, and his fingertips traced the line of her bikini top, along the curve of her breast.
“Jesus,” he whispered.
She lifted his face to hers. Saw the wolfish sort of look in his eyes. Wondered if it would really be so bad if she just went to lay down with him.
“There you are,” gasped a voice on the staircase behind Julia.
Julia scrambled to her feet, wrenching herself from William’s grasp. He looked as startled as she felt by the breaking of the spell.
“We have to go,” came the voice again, and Julia turned. How had she not recognized the voice as her sister’s? She managed to mumble something incomprehensible even to herself.
“Uncle Rob is dying,” Alison said.
“What?” She had Julia’s full attention now. “How do you know?”
“Holly told me. Aunt Kathleen just called here on the phone.”
“Let’s go,” said Julia, springing forward.
Alison stopped her with a hand on her arm. “He’s not at Gran’s.”
“Where is he?”
“Marin General. ”
“You mean Marin County?”
Alison nodded.
“What the hell was he doing there?”
“Somebody found him at Point Reyes. Apparently he decided to take an impromptu road trip.”
“Do Mom and Dad know?”
“Somebody probably called them at the restaurant, but you know Dad can’t leave. Maybe Mom can.”
“We have to get there,” said Julia desperately.
“I’m trying to find someone here with a car who can drive us.”
“I can take Julia.” Behind her, William’s voice startled Julia. She had almost forgotten he was there.
Julia turned to face him. “How are you going to take me?”
“On my motorcycle, of course. I wouldn’t have been much of a biker without a bike.”
“You don’t have any other clothes,” Alison pointed out to Julia.
It was true. She couldn’t exactly hop on the back of his bike in a mermaid skirt and bikini top. Even if the skirt would let her mount the bike, it was getting colder, and it was going to rain.
“We’ll have to call a cab,” Julia said.
“I don’t have that kind of cash on me,” Alison despaired.
“We’re in a house. Maybe you can scrounge around and find something to wear?” William suggested.
Alison looked at Julia. “Borrow something from Holly.”
“I’ll stay here,” William shouted after them as they ran past.
“I’m so sorry,” whispered Alison, gripping Julia’s arm when they were safely past him. “But I was afraid you’d be angry with me if I didn’t tell you. Please tell me I made the right call.”
“Of course you did,” murmured Julia, flipping the lights on in Holly’s room. “You were just in time.”
Together, they rifled through Holly’s closet. Holly’s clothes were still two or three sizes too big, and the pants were too short for her legs. But with the help of some belts, it might do the trick. Julia wriggled out of her mermaid skirt and yanked on the smallest pair of jeans she could find. Too big, but only just. She threaded a belt through the belt loops, tightened it to its tightest setting. They stayed up .
Alison handed her a long-sleeved T-shirt, a fleece sweater, an all-weather jacket to go over that. Mittens, a scarf. A fleece hat. A pair of rain boots, too big, but it hardly mattered until she got to the hospital and needed to walk again. She would bring her sandals with her.
While Julia braided her hair down her back, Alison peeked out the door into the hallway. “Look at him out there, still sitting in that same chair. I should go out there and talk to him. Help him think less about Ariel, and more about Lorena Bobbitt.”
Julia tied off the braid. “How will you get there?”
“I’ll just have to see if I can find a ride.” Alison touched Julia’s arm as she started to brush past. “Be careful.”
Julia ran back to the hallway and found William in his chair still. She gathered up her bag and headed for the staircase.
“Let’s go.”
He got up and followed her downstairs wordlessly. The crowd was almost impenetrable now. He took her hand, assumed the lead, and sliced through the crowd like an ice breaker.
Out the front door they spilled into the chill night air. Still he held her mittened hand and led her to his motorcycle parked on the corner. She watched as he silently pulled on his gloves, zipped his jacket. Then he took his own helmet and lowered it onto her head.
Confused, she looked around him for the second helmet, and saw none hanging on his bike. Her heart sank a little. Clearly, he had not been thinking of taking her anywhere tonight.
“I can’t do this,” she protested. “You can’t take me all the way to Marin on your motorcycle with no helmet.”
He said nothing, just fastened the strap under her chin and tightened it as far as it would go. She tried to back away, but to her shock, he lifted her and put her on the back of his bike himself. A fleeting image of Viking abduction passed through her mind as he mounted the bike in front of her, until the roar of the un-muffled engine blasted the thought from her mind.
Great, she thought. I’ve gone from Viking conquest to biker bitch in one turn of a key.
“Hold on as tight as you can,” he shouted over his shoulder at her.
She tightened her grip slightly .
“Much tighter. Trust me on this.”
She squeezed him around the waist as tight as she could. With a blast of the engine, he peeled away from the curb, jerking her head back with the force of the acceleration.
She hardly knew what happened after that as she held on to him for dear life. She had a vague awareness of winding in and out of streets she didn’t know, rolling through stop signs, flying up hills and down again. They were both lifelong residents of the city, but she couldn’t guess how he knew his way around these streets when she didn’t. She recognized Taraval as they crossed it, but then the unfamiliar side streets swallowed them again. She was beginning to wonder if maybe he wasn’t such a hot shot, maybe he was lost too, when the side streets dumped them out onto 19 th Avenue.
They split lanes and swerved around stopped traffic, making record progress through the Sunset, Golden Gate Park, Richmond. Roaring through the Presidio, onto 101.
The Golden Gate Bridge loomed ahead of them. The rain system had not arrived, not yet shrouded it in clouds. The air changed, blasting through William’s hair, and she realized that he must be freezing to death with no helmet. She wondered why he hadn’t worn a hat, and realized that the wind probably would have blown it off, anyway. Nothing for it now. They accelerated onto the bridge. She gripped his waist tighter, hoping it would somehow keep him warmer, and turned her head to watch the city lights and Alcatraz glowing on her right. To her left spread the black expanse of the open ocean.
On the Marin side, her head jerked back again as he blasted the engine. They drove another fifteen minutes or so, then exited the freeway. It wasn’t much longer until the hospital loomed before them.
He found a parking spot and silenced the engine. Her ears rang as she leaped off the back of the bike and took off the helmet. She waited as patiently as she could while he removed his gloves, jammed on his hat, and fumbled with his helmet.
His whole body shook with cold.
“Let me do that,” she said, taking the helmet from him and hanging it herself. The deed done, she added, “Let’s run. It’ll warm you up, anyway. ”
They sprinted into the hospital building as fast as her too-big boots would let her and found somebody at a desk to direct them to her uncle’s room. She jammed the elevator button repeatedly, but it didn’t come fast enough, so they bounded up flights of stairs and burst breathlessly onto her uncle’s unit in front of the nurse’s station.
The nurse at the station looked up wide-eyed at them.
“I’m looking for Robert Dunphy’s room, please,” Julia panted. “I’m his niece.”
The nurse gave her the room number and pointed her in the right direction. “But first, let me find his nurse so she can fill you in on what to expect. He’s stable for now, so there’s no urgency.”
A few minutes later, the nurse arrived at the station. “He’s lucid at the moment, but when he arrived he was disoriented. His kidneys are failing.”
“Do you have any more information on how he ended up here? All I heard is that he was at Point Reyes.”
“Yes, some passers-by found him collapsed there. He’s got a fair knot on his head. I don’t know any more than that.” She touched Julia’s shoulder. “Have you seen him lately?”
“A week or so ago.”
The nurse nodded. “I just wanted to make sure you knew what to expect.”
The nurse led them in the direction of the room. They slowed their pace as they approached, and Julia went inside. Her uncle’s eyes were closed, his mouth open. His appearance was nothing short of skeletal. A large white bandage covered part of his forehead, presumably where he hit it. She went forward and clasped his hand in her own. It was so bony, she was afraid of breaking it if she gripped it too tightly. His sunken eyes opened, and he smiled in recognition.
William hung back in the doorway, halfway hiding behind the door jamb. She looked back and saw him reeling a bit in shock at her uncle’s appearance.
“I’ll be in the waiting room,” he said in a low voice.
She nodded, and watched him go.
“Your friend is cute,” her uncle offered when she turned back to him.
“He’s not just my friend.”
He summoned enough strength to give her hand a faint squeeze. After a moment, he asked, “What are you doing here, Julie?”
“I should be asking you the same thing.”
“I needed to see it one more time.”
“See what?”
“Point Reyes.”
“Why?”
He turned his face back toward the ceiling and closed his eyes. “Tim.”
She wondered if he was getting confused again. She stroked his hand, waited. After a moment, he turned back to her and said, “They could have just left me there. I really didn’t want to die in my mother’s house, but I guess that would have been preferable to here.”
She did not know what to say. She couldn’t tell him he wasn’t going to die here. She was afraid he would be embarrassed if she told him everyone was coming. So she stroked his hand and said, “Alison dressed as Lorena Bobbit for Halloween.”
A slow smile played at his lips. After a moment’s consideration, he said, “That’s not far from the truth.”
She laughed, and his body shook a bit with silent laughter.
“I don’t know why you’re here, but I’m glad you came,” he said after he recovered. “How did you get here?”
“William brought me. My boyfriend.”
He looked serious now. “I’m sorry I scared him off.”
“You didn’t. You heard him; he’s in the waiting room.”
He squeezed her hand with as much strength as he could muster. “Follow your heart.”
He turned back toward the ceiling and closed his eyes once again. She stroked his hand again, but he seemed to be asleep. She paged the nurse, who examined him.
“It will probably be tonight,” the nurse said gently.
An hour later, her uncle lay with his mouth open, his breathing labored. Julia leaned forward, pressing her forehead against the hand she clasped in her own.
She heard a noise behind her, and turned to see William disappear behind the door jamb. Swiping at her tears, she sprang to her feet and ran into the hallway to find William heading back in the direction of the waiting room.
“Will.”