Chapter 43
chapter
forty-three
MAREN
I clutch the roof rails on both sides, staring ahead but not really seeing anything, not with the adrenaline pumping through me. Bright spots dance across my vision, and my heart races, even though we’re not moving yet.
Nate’s arm hangs out of the driver’s-side window of his Jeep. “Ready?” he calls into the dark night.
It’s calm out here, but we’re about to make some noise, the auditory equivalent of paint splattered onto a blank canvas.
“Let’s do it!” I call back.
The Jeep’s headlights brighten the path ahead, but it doesn’t matter. I’m more focused on the sky to notice the stretch of fields around us.
Nate starts slow. It’s so slow that the wind barely whips through my hair.
“Faster!” I yell. I can’t hear him over the rumble of the engine or the music he’s now playing, but I’d bet he’s chuckling.
The Jeep moves quicker until the wind stings my cheeks, and I cheer. My voice carries over the song bursting from the radio. It stretches beyond the zigzags of dirt roads here in the country, disturbing the peace of the night.
I squeal when he turns, and I grip the rails tighter as we dart farther into the fields. My body jostles from side to side until we reach a steady pace, my limbs starfished up here the same way I sprawl out on my bed.
We zoom through the night, the upbeat music matching my excitement, and I smile, flying on the roof of Nate’s Jeep like we used to.
We tried it for the first time during our junior year, soon after he’d gotten his first Jeep. It was new at the time, and he didn’t want to get a scratch on it—understandably.
He nearly had a heart attack when I suggested we ride through the back roads to be among the stars. He trickled so slowly through these same paths in order to avoid kicking up too much dirt and getting too much dust on his shiny new toy.
With my arm dangling out the window, I promised I’d wash it myself if he would go faster. That, plus a sizzling kiss, convinced him, and it wasn’t long before he was having so much fun that he forgot what he was so worried about.
Besides, a little dirt never hurt anything.
But I wanted to feel the wind in my hair. Being trapped inside the Jeep wasn’t getting the job done. Which is what led him to dare me to ride on the roof.
I thought he was kidding. The idea was so absurd, but he hopped up there himself—fearless.
Lying up here now shoots my nervous system with adrenaline. Reckless exhilaration. Up here, with the black canvas of the night stretched over me, I’m untouchable.
My cheeks burn from smiling so hard.
I lick my lips, but the gust of wind dries them right back. My hair whips this way and that, and my hands grow sore from gripping the rails so tightly.
But it’s all proof that I’m alive and fearless too.
I’m not sure how long I’m up here before Nate turns again, but I’m so lost in the stars that the sudden motion jars me. My body slides to one side, and I yelp.
Nate turns the radio down. “You good up there?”
“Never better,” I answer on a laugh.
And I keep laughing as Nate lurches to a stop. My eyes water from the wind, plus my exceedingly loud laughter.
The only word I can use to describe this laughter is… gleeful. And I didn’t even realize until now that it was ever part of my vocabulary.
The driver door shuts, and I scoot to the edge of the Jeep, my feet dangling over the back, where I know Nate stands. My heart hammers against my rib cage, rattling each bone like a mallet on a xylophone, a fun tune that’s so perfect for this night.
I drop into Nate’s waiting arms and burst into laughter once again when he spins me around, the low rumble of the Jeep muffled by our mini-celebration.
“Is it possible to be too hyped on adrenaline? I’m fucking drunk.” I pant each word as I struggle for my next breath.
The red glow from the taillights casts a shadow over his features, but from this close, I notice his eyes crinkled in the corners. “Adrenaline is good for the soul,” he muses.
“Then my soul is officially healed, because I think I’ve gotten a bigger rush of dopamine this week than I have in years combined. I didn’t realize how badly I needed it.”
“Glad to be of service.” Nate dips his head and kisses me.
The strike of lightning brightens the sky, and the clap of thunder that follows vibrates in my muscles. The stillness of the night fades as the growing gusts of wind whistle through the field. The leaves and tiny pebbles from the dirt road rustle and crack with the promise of a storm.
But I don’t dare stop this kiss.
I bury my fingers in Nate’s hair, scraping my nails along his scalp. My pulse spikes yet again as I tug him closer and feast on his lips.
My legs are jelly.
Between the mind-blowing sex and flying, I might’ve already keeled over if Nate weren’t holding me.
He was fucking bare inside me.
Earlier tonight, Nate plunged into me like a man on a mission, and the friction was so damn good, I might never recover. He burrowed himself so deeply inside me that I’m completely, happily, euphorically ruined.
It was like he was trying to be part of me, as if he didn’t know he already is.
He always has been.
More flashes of lightning cut through the clouds above, and slaps of thunder echo around us the longer we stand here.
Moaning, I drag my hands down the sides of his face and grip the lapels of his collar. The buttons imprint themselves in my palms as I kiss him harder.
A raindrop taps the ball of my cheek.
It’s not long before we’re kissing in the rain like teenagers again.
Earlier tonight, we did something we’ve never done. Had a date in a place that was new to us both. But I couldn’t let this night end without a splash of nostalgia.
I can finally look back on our memories together without the punch of heartache, because I know things happened that way for a reason.
And I’m thankful, no matter how badly I’d once wished things were different.
But Nate barreled back into Sapphire Creek at the perfect time—when I needed his wild interruption to my quiet life the most.
A steady rain drenches our clothes down to the socks on our feet. Our kiss grows wet and tender, slowing as the drops come down faster and harder. We’re in no rush.
I tilt my head up, eyes closed and arms out, enjoying the beauty and chaos of nature like I would a religious experience.
I feel Nate’s eyes on me, lingering and searing every inch as they trail from my head to my toes and back up.
“I love you,” he says, his voice clear over the rain. His breath draws out of him slowly, like he’s waited a long time to make this declaration.
I swipe my wet hair and the excess water from my eyes, bringing him back into focus as best I can with the droplets blurring my vision.
“I love you,” he repeats with a shy smile.
Nathan McAllister does not get shy.
What little remained of the firm walls supporting my chest all these years completely crumbles, disintegrating into dust, and my heart melts into a puddle.
“That’s not a first-date confession.” I gulp.
“Oh, right. Showing cards too soon and all that.” He wraps his arms around my soaking waist, an amused smirk lifting the corners of his lips.
Rain drips from his eyelashes and the ends of his hair, his dimpled, boyish grin completing how cute he is right now.
“So, it’s more of a third-date confession, right? ”
“Totally,” I tease. My eyes mist, but it’s not because of the rain.
“That’s fine. I’ll say it again then.” Nate shrugs. “It’ll be just as true then as it is now, if not more so.”
My knees wobble, and delirious joy swims through my body. I open my mouth to respond, but headlights cut between us.
I wince against the harsh interruption.
The car comes to a stop a few yards away—a cop car.
I can’t see his face, but I’m able to make out his silhouette against the headlights. The dark figure grows larger as he jogs toward us. “You folks all right?” the voice calls out.
More laughter bubbles up my throat and erupts out of me so hard that I have to lean onto Nate for balance, clinging to his forearms.
Nate and I are interrupted for the second time tonight. For such a small town, there sure is a lot going on, but it doesn’t matter. We have all the time in the world, anyway.
“We weren’t caught with our pants down. That has to count for something,” Nate says out of one side of his mouth like Colton can still hear us, but he’s already backing out of the driveway.
“We still had a police escort back to our house.” I swipe at the corners of my eyes, sure my mascara is smeared into black circles around my eyes like a raccoon. “I should probably be at least a little embarrassed by that.”
“How many people in town noticed, do you think?” He folds his hand over mine and leads the way toward his porch, the storm diminishing into a drizzle.
“I’d say no fewer than eleven people will be talking about this at Bready or Knot in the morning.”
Another pair of headlights swings in our direction as a car pulls into the driveway behind Nate’s Jeep.
“Don’t tell me the gossip cavalry is here already,” he jokes, as he brings a hand to his forehead to shield himself from the blinding lights.
“Daddy!” Teagan rushes up to where we stand in front of the door.
“Whoa, kiddo.” Nate stops her from barreling into him. “I don’t want to get your pretty red top wet. But I’ll give you a big ole bear hug once I get some dry clothes on.”
She crinkles her nose, and her curious gaze flits from him to me. “Did you two play in the rain? I want to play in the rain on my date someday.”
I snap my attention to Nate, who gapes back at me.
“I mean, I know I said I don’t want to date, but if it means I get to play in the rain, I’d probably change my mind.” Teagan’s wide, innocent grin is a far cry from Nate’s and my stunned expressions.
He scrambles for a response as Sabrina appears next to us with a warm greeting.