Chapter 16
Xander
Is the Honeymoon Over?
The Newest Mrs. Sutton Seen Leaving the Home of American Royalty.
I arrived at the newly purchased Dawn Capital building in lower Manhattan.
The elevator doors opened, and I folded the paper in half in my hands.
It was a stupid headline above pictures of Penelope leaving Tristan’s Hamptons house early in the morning a few days ago.
It was for work; she needed Tristan to sign some disclosures to finish off her tenure with Dawn Capital since she couldn’t
continue being our counsel, given the wedding and Sloan’s warning. Sloan recommended counsel at a separate firm and that was
taken care of quickly, under the guise of a conflict of interest.
And Maya stayed with Tristan most summers; it was some bizarre tradition they had. So Penelope and Maya worked there a lot.
It made sense, even though it felt like Penelope was avoiding me.
None of that perfectly reasonable information abated the unfamiliar urge to strangle one of my closest friends.
“Don’t read that trash,” CeCe insisted from behind the reception desk on the top floor.
“What are you doing here?” I asked. When I got close enough to her, she reached over the desk, grabbed the paper, and threw
it out.
“It’s a long story, but I work here now.”
CeCe was often unsure of where to go but she was never lost. She and I had developed a kinship over the years, one rooted
in the fact that we were the ones everyone worried about for a period of time.
“Got it.” I took the hint to not ask why she was there and if it had anything to do with her abrupt departure from Vogue last summer. I looked into my office and saw Rohan and Tristan seated, waiting.
“Jackson is still in Dubai, so it’s just you three,” CeCe explained as she sat back down and pointed to my door. “They’re
waiting for you.”
The morning light streamed through the floor-to-ceiling windows of my sparsely decorated office, offering a view of Lower
Manhattan.
“Any reason we don’t manage majority stake in SunCorp yet?” Rohan inquired from his seat in front of my desk. He was the obvious
choice for CEO of Dawn Capital since none of the other cofounders—myself included—wanted anything to do with that job. Tristan
and I oversaw operations, and Jackson ran the financials.
“I can handle it if you’ve got too much going on,” Tristan offered as I walked into my office, rounded the side of my desk,
and took a seat.
“No, I’ll take care of it,” I told him with a new urgency to get the SunCorp deal locked up.
My phone buzzed on my desk, I glanced to see the same headline pop up there, too. I swiped it off my screen.
“I mean it, I don’t mind.” Tristan glanced up from the papers he was reviewing, the corners of his mouth tipped up. “Maybe plan a few date nights.”
“That’s not funny,” I retorted quietly. “You wouldn’t make that joke if it were Sloan or CeCe.”
It had to be some sort of sick karma that his joke was the exact one I would have made if it were anyone else in my situation.
“You wouldn’t be so flustered if it were Sloan or CeCe. You wouldn’t have kissed either of them like you did at the wedding
if it were Sloan or CeCe.” He put the papers down and leaned back into his seat. I glanced over to Rohan, who was still reading,
ignoring us. An uncomfortable shiver ran up my spine at the idea of having to kiss either Sloan or CeCe. “Or flirt with them
like you do with Poppy .”
I looked up at him and tried not to react, even though my mind replayed that kiss every chance it got—torturing me with the
memory of what she tasted like. I knew he was joking, and using the nickname to prove a point, but an uncomfortable tightness
moved through my muscles. Only I called her Poppy.
“I didn’t think so,” Tristan said, seeing my expression. He pushed himself forward and neatly placed the stack of papers on
my desk. “If you were wondering when we called your bluff, it was the masquerade. The way you stormed after her and got in
Xu’s face.”
“I was vetting him,” I barked, looking down at my phone.
That part was true. I was. Penelope hadn’t looked like herself; she’d looked a little scared. I couldn’t just let that go.
It didn’t sit right. My gut told me to do something .
“No, we were trying to vet him,” Rohan, for the first time in weeks, answered with a lightness that had long since left him. Dawn Capital’s success meant a lot to all of us for different rea sons. Rohan’s drove him to a relentless pursuit of perfection. “ You were trying—”
“Drop it,” I snapped.
I knew now that Penelope found out about her mother’s shares being tied up in her inheritance that night. But at the time,
watching her walk away, despite me trying to hold on, felt like...
Like more than I ever wanted to feel again.
“Fine,” Rohan agreed and looked at Tristan sternly.
They both stood and made their way to the door, and an awkward silence filled the room. Rohan walked in the direction of his
office, but Tristan lingered in the doorway.
“I mean it.” I stared at my phone screen. “Drop it.”
“Hey.” Tristan waited until I finally gave in and looked at him. “After everything we’ve been through, the last thing you
need is—”
“To be reminded of every time I fucked up?” I snapped again; guilt curdled in my stomach.
“To pretend nothing bothers you,” Tristan answered back calmly.
I did that a lot. Pretend.
Pretend that my mind didn’t replay all the worst memories I had like some sick highlight reel. That—for a long time—I wasn’t
being crushed under the weight of my own sadness. That I was okay when I wasn’t.
It happened for years and always had a way of coming to the surface at the worst times.
Tristan let out a frustrated sigh when I didn’t say anything. He continued. “You looked lost and wrecked that night.”
I loved them for caring, but I hated myself for being such a fucking mess for so long that their initial reaction to a change
in my life was outright panic.
“Well, I’m fine now.” I gave him a tight smile.
What was I going to say? That I still had no fucking idea how I felt? Because I didn’t. Every day I was finding new ways that this feeling I had for her ran deeper than I ever thought it did. And every day, I was reminded that she’d never see me the way I saw her—the lighthouse was the perfect example. I took her there thinking she’d like the peace. Then, as we left, it felt like she was trying to convince me to get back together with Madison.
The arrangement didn’t just buy her time, but it gave me some, too. Time to untangle whatever it was I felt for her and move
past it. Past her.
He turned on his heels, shaking his head, and walked out of the office. My phone chimed and a couple messages lit up the screen.
Selena: Did you see the headline?
Selena: This is supposed to be my summer off.
Xander: Sorry, I’ll fix it.
Selena: If you and Penelope can’t sell it here, go on a “honeymoon.”