Chapter 8 #3
‘Yes, mostly. The damage that affects my fine motor skills, the small movements in my fingers needed to tie my shoe laces is still there, but the brain has found a way round it, it’s found a new path so I can do those things again.
But very occasionally, especially if I’m really tired or really upset or stressed, I’ll have a little blip.
I guess because of the stress I’m under my brain starts trying the old path instead of the new one.
I might stare at the buttons on my shirt and just forget how to do them up even though I’ve been doing them just fine for years.
The last time was a year ago when I was really ill with the flu.
The time before that was about two years ago when Jacob’s brother died.
I grieved so hard for him, cried non-stop for weeks, and that was it, the block came back.
I think it will probably always be there lingering in the shadows of my brain, and if I get really upset over something I’ll just forget how to do it all over again.
But normally, once I’ve calmed down or had a break from trying, it comes back. ’
Immy pushed her hand through her hair, it had been a long road.
‘Learning to do these things again taught me about my limits too. Yes I did the exercises every single day, yes I tried to do the buttons on my shirt and tie my shoelaces every day, but sometimes it wasn’t going to happen and I had to accept that.
Sometimes it was enough to just watch Alex do my buttons for me, slowly, because watching was a form of learning too.
And sometimes you just need to have a break from trying.
I did a lot of painting during that time, a lot of work with clay too.
Having that creative outlet was really important. ’
Xander nodded. ‘Yes, I’ve heard that. Quinn and Alex work at the Wonky Tree Studios and they do therapeutic art workshops to help those with brain injuries.’
‘Yes, I’m so proud of her for being involved in that.
But that’s why when I run the Easter egg hunt all the money goes to brain injury charities like Headway as they do a lot of rehabilitation workshops.
Meeting other people who were in the same boat as me really helped.
I also donate the proceedings to stroke charities because a stroke can cause damage to the brain too.
Alzheimer’s and dementia are also connected to the brain and, while they involve a different kind of damage that can’t be cured, there are things that can help so we’ve given to them over the years too. ’
‘That’s wonderful. I can see why you’re so passionate about it now.’
‘Yeah, we have to make sure the Easter egg hunt goes ahead this year, in some capacity. Even if the shop isn’t ready, the hunt still needs to happen.’
‘We’ll make sure of that.’
‘Thank you. So, are you not close with your brothers?’
‘I am and I’m not. I love them all dearly. Growing up with no parents, it made us stick together, look out for each other. We give each other hell and take the piss out of each other but it comes from a place of love.’
Immy laughed.
‘I’m closer to Logan and Jared, as they are nearer to my age, Logan was born the year before me and Jared a year later.
Then there was a bit of a gap where my dad was clearly behaving himself, then Ryker was born two and a half years later, then Max the following year, then Archer a year later.
Logan is… difficult. As the oldest I think he felt responsible for us.
He would always protect us so fiercely growing up.
That hasn’t really changed now and consequently he seems to take everything so seriously.
I can’t even remember the last time I heard him laugh out loud at something.
I don’t see Jared that often because he works so damn hard, although we all keep in touch via a group text chat when we can.
Ryker does a lot of travelling around the world as part of his job.
He loves it but part of me thinks he’s just running away from the loneliness that we all felt growing up.
Max, as you know, has more jobs than you can count but as we both live in the same town, I see him all the time, which as you’ve experienced tonight is not necessarily a good thing.
Archer is so laid-back he’s practically horizontal.
He’s an artist so he definitely has that chilled-out vibe. ’
‘I know Logan, Archer and Max, I don’t know the others.’
‘They were all there at Violet’s Big Christmas Day lunch last year,’ Xander said, referring to his aunt’s Christmas celebrations that the whole family was invited to.
‘Yeah, I only had eyes for you at that party,’ Immy said.
He smiled. ‘Same. You looked ravishing in that red velvet dress.’
‘And you did ravish me in that dress later that night. You were like a wild animal. I barely got through the front door of your flat and you had me pinned up against the wall. Best sex ever.’
‘I’m pretty sure we’ll be recreating that moment tonight, you look divine in that dress.’ He stroked her wrist in a way that made her stomach clench with need.
‘I cannot wait. We can always get this food to go and eat it at home after you’ve recreated that moment.’
‘Don’t tempt me. I promised you a proper date and I mean to keep that promise.’
She brought his hand to her mouth and kissed the inside of his palm. ‘OK.’
He swallowed. ‘But maybe we can get dessert to go.’
‘That sounds like a plan.’
Immy watched Xander drive painfully slowly along the country lanes back to Lovegrove Bay. She didn’t know if he was deliberately trying to torture her by prolonging the journey home or whether he was just being extra careful because of the precious load she was carrying.
He glanced across at her and smiled. The date had gone really well, beautiful location, beautiful man, it couldn’t have been more perfect.
They had talked constantly throughout the evening and it was no surprise to her that they got on so well, even without Max’s guide to dating.
But throughout the date there had been little touches, looks, comments about what he wanted to do to her later, so already her body was humming with need for him.
He reached out and placed a hand on her thigh, stroking the inside of her leg through the silky fabric of her dress. She let out a little moan of need as he moved his hand slowly up her thigh.
‘You need to hurry up. If we don’t get home soon, I might spontaneously combust,’ Immy said.
‘That would be a travesty, especially because you’ll miss out on the hottest sex of your life.’
‘That’s a bold claim,’ Immy said, writhing in her seat as his hand drew closer to the exact spot she needed him. ‘I’m not sure you can top your previous endeavours. You already hold every spot in the top ten.’
‘I can pull over and give you a little taster if you want,’ Xander said.
Her heart leapt. ‘What?’
‘I can find a secluded spot on the side of the road and take care of you, if you feel like you can’t wait until we get home. I mean, we’ll be home in ten or fifteen minutes but if you’re at risk of spontaneous combustion it’s probably safer if we pull over. It’s your call.’
She looked around. The road they were on was completely deserted and there were lots of trees and wooded areas on either side of the road.
She’d never done anything like that before.
After the accident she had reinvented herself, given up her boring accountancy job and opened up the sweet shop which had always been her dream.
She’d swapped dark suits for brightly coloured dresses, she’d taken up scuba diving and learnt how to play the saxophone.
She wanted to live a life of joy, excitement and adventure.
When Xander had offered her a one-night stand, something she had never wanted before, she’d decided to throw caution to the wind and do it.
But she’d never had sex in a car before or maybe he planned to do it outside.
‘Pull over,’ she said.
‘No problem, let me find a good place.’
Within moments Xander was pulling off the road and following a tiny dirt track through the trees.
When the car was far enough away from the road, he pulled over onto the side of the dirt track, turned the engine off and immediately got out.
Her heart was thumping against her chest with excitement.
He walked round to her side of the car, opened the door and offered her a hand to get out.
‘Where are we going?’ Immy said, taking his hand and stepping out the car.
‘We’re not going anywhere. The old Xander probably would have taken you against the nearest tree, but you’re carrying my baby, so I want you to be comfortable.’ He opened the back door. ‘Get in and lie down.’
There was something oddly thrilling about him being so bossy and commanding. She got in and lay down on the seat, her feet just dangling over the edge. She propped herself up on her elbows so she could watch him.
He took his jacket off, slinging it into the front, and then stood there, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt as he stared at her.
She didn’t know why that was so hot but it was.
He grabbed the hem of her dress and very slowly started pushing the dress up towards her hips so it rested around her belly.
The way he stared at her so hungrily made her go weak.
‘I like these tiny shorts,’ he said.
‘I do too. Would you like me to take them off?’
‘Oh no. I very much want to take them off myself.’
She watched as he hooked his fingers in the waistband and very slowly slid them down. As he pulled them off he shoved them in his trouser pocket and she laughed at the audacity.
He leaned over, took hold of her hips and tugged her towards him so her hips were now on the edge of the seat and her legs were resting on him. He bent over, hooking her knees over his shoulders, and without any further preamble his mouth was suddenly right there where she needed him the most.
She cried out in shock as pleasure surged through her.
She’d presumed there would be some preliminaries, some kissing, some gentle lead up to it, but Xander had clearly sensed her urgency and just skipped straight ahead to the main event.
She clutched at the headrest with one hand, grabbed his hair and wiggled and writhed against him.
‘Keep still,’ he muttered against her before he continued worshipping her body’s most sensitive area with his mouth.
That sensation built in her so quickly, like he knew exactly what she needed.
He made her feel so alive. Tingles turned to fireworks and then like an explosion her orgasm ripped through her so hard, she could barely catch her breath.
But he didn’t stop. Just as she felt herself starting to come down from her high, he started stroking her with his thumb and she arched off the seat as she felt herself tightening all over again.
She cried out his name as he pushed her over the edge a second time. Finally he relented and she was left a wreck of a woman. She couldn’t talk, she couldn’t think, she could barely breathe.
‘Feel better now?’
She could only nod, talking required too much effort and thought.
‘Can we go home now?’ Xander asked.
‘I… I need a minute,’ she managed to get out.
He nodded then pushed her dress up a bit more so her belly was exposed and he placed a long, loving kiss right on her belly. She smiled with love for him.
‘Sorry about the commotion, little one, but it’s your mum’s fault. She just looks so damn devastatingly beautiful, I can’t help myself.’
‘I bet you won’t be saying that in a few months’ time when I’m the size of a whale.’
He smiled. ‘I promise, when you’re nine months pregnant and even if you’re the size of a house, I will still think you’re the most beautiful woman in the world. I’ll still want to make love to you if you’ll let me.’
She smiled at that thought.
‘I’m ready to go home now.’
He stood up and offered out a hand, helping her to get out the car. She smoothed down her dress.
‘Can I have my shorts back?’ Immy asked.
‘Absolutely not.’
She laughed and leaned up to kiss him. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close.
She pulled back to look at his lovely face. ‘Take me home.’
‘It will be my pleasure.’