Chapter Seventeen
I am confused by life, and I feel safe within the confines of theatre.
—Helen Hayes
Mallory swiped tears from her cheeks as she clutched Nan’s journal and read aloud, whispering the words.
She doubted anyone else could hear her, but she didn’t want to be found right now.
She wanted to stay hidden, tucked away in the Finders Keepers Library.
After driving around Bloom and trying to figure out what to do, she’d found herself here of all places, surrounded by books, even though the only book she wanted to read right now was her grandmother’s journal.
“I slept in the bed and Mickey slept on the couch for the first week after Michael’s funeral,” Nan wrote. “Then, slowly, we grew back into what we were. It was a process and it didn’t happen overnight.”
Mallory’s eyes blurred, and she took a moment to close them and attempt to settle her emotions. Then a text pinged from her phone lying next to her on the floor of the little library. Mallory didn’t even want to look at her screen, but she did, almost reflexively.
Hollis: Meet me at 212 Blue Cedar Road. 6:30.
Mallory quickly blinked past her blur of tears and reread the message.
That was the address of the barn on Popadine’s Tree Farm.
What’s going on? The very last thing she felt like doing tonight was seeing Hollis.
Yes, last night’s date had been lovely, but she was in no mood for romance right now.
All she wanted to do was crawl under her covers and disappear.
Hollis: You owe me, remember?
He’d picked some time to collect on debts.
With a sigh, she closed Nan’s journal and dropped it back into her bag—the revelations of Nan’s last entry reverberating through her.
Why had her grandmother never mentioned Michael?
This whole time, Mallory had assumed the baby Nan was carrying in these entries was Mallory’s mother, Daisy. But that wasn’t the case.
Mallory’s phone pinged again. Looking down, she felt a fluttery feeling in her chest at the sight of Hollis’s name.
Hollis: We’ll have heaters, but wear something warm just in case.
“What is he doing?” Getting up quickly, Mallory dusted off the bottom of her pants. She just wanted to be alone. But because of Hollis busting into her business, she couldn’t. On a heavy sigh, she stepped out of the library.
“Would you like a cup of hot tea, dear?” Eleanor asked as Mallory came closer.
Mallory hadn’t even seen her there. The older woman was sitting on the back porch with a colorful blanket wrapped around her and an open book in her lap. “I would love a cup, but I actually have somewhere I need to be right now. Next time.”
“Of course.” Eleanor closed the book she’d been reading. “Savannah was looking for you earlier. From what I hear, everyone has been looking for you, dear. Except your grandpa Charlie. He’s the one who told me you were here.”
Mallory wasn’t surprised. She’d always had the most special bond with Charlie.
Maybe that was why she’d been avoiding him lately.
He could always look at her and see through her pretense of being fine.
She loved her grandfather, but she didn’t want to worry him.
Just like her sister, Maddie, Grandpa Charlie was leading his own life with his new spouse.
This was Mallory’s problem to solve. No one else’s, and certainly not Hollis’s.
Mallory glanced around. “Did you tell them where to find me?” Because no one else was here—just she and Eleanor.
“I told everyone who asked that a woman who wants to be alone should be… Are you feeling better?”
Mallory’s shoulders felt tight as she shrugged and let them fall by her side. “Not exactly.” As soon as her honest answer came out, she forced a smile. “But it’s okay. I’m fine.”
“I doubt that.” Eleanor looked at her knowingly. “Come back anytime. For tea. Books. A listening ear.”
“Thank you.” Mallory waved and took the path around Eleanor’s house, walking toward her car. Once she was seated behind the wheel, she cranked the engine and directed her car to the address that Hollis had texted.
She didn’t doubt his intention, but she wasn’t up for facing anyone tonight. There was too much raw emotion swirling around her chest, making it tight and uncomfortable. Ten minutes later, she pulled onto a gravel path that led to Popadine’s Tree Farm.
Why did Hollis invite her to meet here at a tree farm of all places?
Mallory followed the dirt path and parked behind Hollis’s truck, near a large open barn. She blew out a breath as she pushed open her driver’s-side door, grabbed her coat, and stepped out. The cold air nipped her cheeks and the tip of her nose.
She followed the sound of voices, stepping into the large candy-apple-red barn and stopping to scan the cast members gathered inside, all chatting and prepping to run lines. What was this? She’d canceled tonight’s rehearsal. Why was everyone here?
Mallory scanned the interior of the barn.
She didn’t think she’d ever even been inside before.
It wasn’t part of the tree farm business, and Pop had only recently had it built prior to his health decline.
The space was large and open. It was also surprisingly warm, despite the dropping temperatures outside.
No one seemed to notice her at first as she stood there, assessing the situation.
Then Hollis looked over, seemingly midconversation with Evan, who was an understudy.
She couldn’t decide if she was angry with him for taking over as the director or grateful for the fact that he cared enough to try to help.
He patted Evan’s shoulder and headed toward Mallory, his gaze unwavering.
She shifted uncomfortably, averting her gaze and trying hard to rein in her feelings. And her attraction. It wasn’t easy to do, with monarch-size butterflies flapping around inside her stomach.
“What’s going on?” she asked when he was only a couple of feet away.
Hollis gestured, holding his arms out to his sides. “We’re having play rehearsal. There’s no time to waste, given that we’re less than two weeks from opening night.”
“I’m the director. I canceled,” she said as he stood in front of her, folding her arms tightly over her chest, feeling the beat of her heart against her forearms. Hard and rapid.
Hollis’s voice was soft in response to her raised one. “I had no right to take over the schedule, and I’m probably way out of line,” he admitted. “It wouldn’t be the first time.”
She inhaled through her nose, realizing that people around them were watching. “You heard about the inspection?” she asked in a near whisper. Of course he had. “So you know how bad it is?”
Hollis gave a one-off nod. “Sounds worse than I’m guessing it actually is. I can take a look if you want.” A small glimmer of a smile lifted the corners of his lips. “This play is important. To your family. To the community… To you.” He ran his tongue along his bottom lip.
If she had a Christmas wish list, the top item would be that she didn’t melt at the sight of his tongue on his lip.
Or the little scar on his temple. He had several scars, reminding her of his younger, wilder days.
Dear Santa, all I want for Christmas is for you to numb my heart to this man in front of me.
Because she wanted to be mad at him right now. Angry, even.
“And because this play matters to you, it also matters to me,” he continued. “Canceling the production is rash.”
“I didn’t cancel the play. I canceled rehearsal. One rehearsal.”
He lifted a brow. “And you disappeared all afternoon. Are you telling me you weren’t going to throw in the towel on the whole thing?”
She heaved a breath. “No stage, no play. What choice do I have?”
He stepped in closer. “Well, if you would have answered my calls, we could have gone over your choices.” He leaned farther in, making her heart swell and lift into the base of her throat. “Emphasis on your choice. You are the director, after all.”
She flung her arms out to her sides and shook her head simultaneously, on the brink of tears.
No crying. Nope. Not happening, especially with all the cast here, pretending not to watch her interaction with Hollis right now.
“This inspector is the final nail in the theater’s coffin.
I have no hope of keeping my promise to put on this play this Christmas.
Much less future Christmases.” Mallory pressed her lips together.
This is exactly why she hadn’t wanted to meet with anyone tonight. Her emotional state was paper thin.
Hollis lowered his head, dipping closer so that only she could hear what he had to say. So close that she could feel his breath on her skin. “Nan is the one who once told me this. When you have no hope left inside you, that’s when you borrow a little from the person beside you.”
That did it. Mallory began to tremble as she tried with all her might to hold her tears at bay.
Nan had never said that to her. Mallory felt like she was losing her grandmother but gaining her at the same time.
How was this even possible? She was losing control of her world.
It was spinning out of orbit, but then, here was Hollis, offering his big, calloused hand for her to take. A lifeline.
He offered his hand.
She understood the question. If she took it, she was in on whatever options he had up his sleeve. If she didn’t, her answer was no, and she was giving up. She’d never been one to give up easily. “Okay,” she said, placing her hand in his, feeling the warmth of his fingers wrap around hers.
“I wasn’t always the guy with the most hope, but I’ve stored some away in my old age. More than enough to offer you this Christmas.”
“You’ve already done so much over the last couple of weeks.” Her gaze slipped past him, bouncing among cast members, new and old.