Arwen
Dearest Milly,
Mr Jones has taken Cosmo to stay with his family in the Midlands on business for three days.
They are seeking workers willing to move here, either permanently or temporarily, to work in the pottery and train local people to do so.
The moment the car had gone, I immediately felt the most enormous weight had been taken off my shoulders: the tyranny that has increasingly fallen over me ever since I came here, and I cannot now understand why I was so dazzled and pleased by Cosmo’s interest in my opinions and my work in the first weeks after I had arrived.
Not that it ever deflected me in the least from wanting to join you and Edwin in Cornwall, for it did not, but at first it did feel like a holiday or a little idyll in an unfamiliar but enchanted place.
I do love the hill, the cliffs, the ancient wood and the monument on the cliff top, but I have no desire to spend even the next three years here, let alone the rest of my life.
Nor has Bea, come to that, even if she longs for a very different life from that I crave.
Her chances seem to be decreasing, for although she came back from a visit to Castle Newydd after the arrival of Miss Stretton, which confirmed what she had heard of that lady’s appearance, she had not been able to get a word in with Mark Prynne, for he and Miss Stretton were so enthusiastically discussing gardening matters in which Bea had no interest at all.
She said Lily was there as usual and seemed already thick as thieves with the visitor, feigning an interest in their plans, but I am very sure Lily was genuinely interested.
She confided to me after church one day that she thought a quiet, open-air life at Castle Newydd, with his new gardening projects, was what Mark most needed.
On top of this disappointment, Cosmo was furious with Bea after receiving a dressmaker’s bill – she has tried to dazzle the poor young man back with a series of ever frillier frocks.
Then in the next breath he contrarily ordered Maudie to have a more suitable and grown-up wardrobe made for me, for I was not the child they treated me as.
Of course, I said I was quite happy with my clothes and needed no new ones – I didn’t want to be beholden to him – but he insisted that I should have something more suitable to wear to church and to dinner.
I found this quite contrary for a man who takes little interest in his own apparel!
However, I was glad to visit the nearest town if only to have my hair cut, even if my insistence that it was bobbed very short horrified the hairdresser and Maudie.
I took little interest in choosing the designs and materials for the new dresses, except to say if they were at all fussy or frilly I would refuse to wear them, and also, the only hat I would agree to wear other than my faithful black felt was a very plain straw, which I have no intention of ever putting on except for church.
It was pleasant to venture further afield than I had done before, even if Maudie and Bea’s company was not very congenial.
So, to return to what I was saying. Cosmo and Mr Jones left directly after breakfast and I fetched my painting materials, told Mrs Bradley I would probably be out to lunch, and set off to St Melangell by the cliff path.
I did a sketch of the village lying below the headland, before descending the path to where the lane ended, by the gates of Castle Newydd, then made my way down to the quay, meaning to paint the quaint fishing boats tied up there.
I found Wilfred Frick, one of the young men I had met in the Blue Parrot, there on the same mission.
We chatted once our works were completed to our satisfaction, and when he suggested I accompany him to the Star and Stone Inn for lunch, where we were sure to find several more friends, I decided to risk Cosmo’s wrath and go with him.
We met several more artists there, including Gwendolen Sutler and Effie, and afterwards some of us went on to visit one of the studios, where we continued the interesting conversation and then later had a strange tea of fried fish and bread, quite the sort of thing we used to get when we visited other young artists’ studios in London, with Edwin or Papa.
I felt very at home in that atmosphere. I am not and never will be grand enough for Triskelion.
I showed some of my day’s work to the others, but although they expressed some interest about my working in the studio of Cosmo Caradoc, I did not let myself be drawn on the subject of Cosmo’s changing style.
I got back, tired and happy, just as Maudie and Bea were going up to change for dinner and did not tell them where I had been and what I had been doing, nor did they evince any interest.
Washing and then changing my old skirt and blouse for one of my two dresses was the matter of a moment, giving me time to write this to you.
I’ll ask Efa to post it in St Melangell when she goes home for the night as usual.
She is walking out with the son of the publican at the Star and Stone, by the bye, and I saw the young man today and had to agree with her that he looks very handsome and good-natured. I am sure he will make her a good husband when they set the day.
I have two more days of freedom – other than going to church, I suppose – and tomorrow plan to try painting in oils en plein air.
I will take two small canvases and have contrived a way of carrying them face to face by pinning bits of cork in the corners to stop the wet surfaces touching one another.
I’m sure there must be a better way, but feel I have been quite ingenious.
Oh, I feel so much more like my real self, I can’t tell you!
Your affectionate friend,
Arwen