5. I cursed him in hoarse, raspy whimpers. #2
Professor Yale grinned. “Class, look very carefully. This will probably be the first—and only—time in your life you will ever see a unicorn of her breed. As a part of your certification, each of you will be exposed to D grade transformative substances to determine your species. Like me, you will probably experience a very minimal alteration, generally harmless in nature. For most situations, there are three grades you need to be aware of: C, B, and A. Exposure to A+ and greater transformative substances will likely result in a permanent transformation or death. D or lower has negligible effects. You can even purchase some limited E grade compounds in novelty stores. Bailey and I each took a pill made from the same batch of compound, which for safety reasons I will not name. No matter which substance Miss Gardener is exposed to, the results are the same, which qualifies her for the safe handling and testing of all A+ graded transformative materials.”
He paused for a moment to let his words sink in. “Neutralizer, please.”
The ceiling sprayers released a cloud of vapor, and I lifted my head, flared my nostrils, and breathed it in.
Professor Yale did the same. From his pocket, he pulled out a meter, which he activated.
It squealed, and only when the wretched device stopped making noise did the chamber operators cut off the vapor flow.
Returning the meter to his pocket, Professor Yale gestured to the bloodied scraps of my hospital gown on the tile.
“The gown she was wearing didn’t survive the transformation process, and her blood was contaminated with the substance.
When you’re in the field, you need to be aware that contamination can easily spread.
All surfaces the victim touched must be neutralized to prevent accidental spread. Any questions?”
On the other side of the glass, many hands went up, and the students eagerly leaned forward.
“Third row, fourth from the left. Ask.”
“Why is Miss Gardener black and red? Aren’t unicorns supposed to be white?”
I snorted and stared at Professor Yale, hoping he’d let me demonstrate something rather than just stand around looking pretty for the amusement and education of a bunch of green recruits. With a faint smile, he nodded.
Twisting around so I faced the glass, I lunged a stride forward, tossed my head back, and stamped my hooves.
I gave a swish of my tail and eyed the humans, faery, and other supernatural hiding behind the barrier, safe and sound.
Most of the time I hated my dirty little unicorn secret, but the body came with one ability I loved: fire.
All the fire, fire for me to breathe, enjoy, and even roll in if I wanted.
I loved fire, and I shared my love with the students, blowing a gout of flame over the glass. Those in the front rows recoiled. A few even screamed, and I enjoyed every moment of it.
“For the record, Miss Gardener classifies as a vanilla human. Transformative substances with an A or greater grading temporarily transfer the abilities of the new form to their victim. This is why these substances are often so dangerous. The higher grade substances come at a great price, including the complete and total loss of personality and identity. In short, should you be exposed to A+ or greater transformative substances, you will irrevocably become a new species. Questions?”
Every hand went up, and Professor Yale picked on a woman. “Yes?”
“Does transforming hurt?”
Since unicorns couldn’t shrug, I shook my head before nodding.
“That depends on the individual. Bailey is often quite vocal when subjected to extreme pain. If she isn’t cursing, it’s typically a tolerable discomfort.
However, as I’ve witnessed her transform numerous times, I’m confident she was sparing your gentle young ears from the profanities that usually spew from her mouth.
Today’s transformation went better than others. ”
“Stings a little,” I contributed, giving a shake of my mane and relaxing my stance.
Professor Yale pointed at someone in the first row. “Ask your question.”
“Can all unicorns talk?”
“No.” I stomped a hoof. “Wilds do not. They hunt. Eat. Burn.”
Oh yes, did they burn. The desire to snort flame and bask in its heat writhed under my skin and heated me from within. Until the transformation reversed, my favorite place in the world was somewhere with a fire. I turned my head to Professor Yale. “Fire?”
The professor chuckled, stepped forward, and gave my shoulder a pat.
“Yes, Bailey. I’ll take you somewhere with a nice fire.
If you haven’t noticed yet, Miss Gardener is keeping to short, easy words, and will often degrade to the simplest methods of communication possible.
Unicorn anatomy, while somewhat compatible with human language, makes speaking difficult.
It’s actually uncomfortable for her to talk.
In addition to that, unicorns have a different thought process and base personality, which does blend with Bailey’s inherent personality.
While at base level she is the same person while human, complete with her memories, she picks up a few elements of a unicorn’s temperament.
In regards to language, when we were initially evaluating her while she was a unicorn, it took her several weeks of effort to master basic English.
” Professor Yale pointed at someone in the audience, a young woman who stood up.
“How long will Miss Gardener remain a unicorn?”
“It varies. No matter which grade you’re subjected to, duration is dependent on the individual.
She might reverse back to human within ten minutes, or she could be stuck for a week.
While many people have a more consistent response to transformative substances, hers is widely variable.
I will lose my new ears within two hours.
The longest time she has remained a unicorn has been eight days.
In emergency situations, A grade and weaker substances can be reversed through treatment in a glass coffin.
The procedure takes two hours, but it’s expensive and risky. ”
I remembered those eight days far too well.
Mary thought it had been funny to use me as a coffee roaster and charged customers a premium for the honor of having a cup made by a fire-breathing unicorn.
She often enjoyed my various mishaps with the CDC, finding some way to earn a profit at my expense.
I really hoped the reversal happened sooner than later.
Trotting around as a unicorn wouldn’t make it easy to find a new job or a place to stay, but at least I could sleep just about anywhere, especially if I stole one of the CDC’s horse blankets.
Then again, I could also swallow my pride and take a nap in their stable.
Wait. Did I even need to ask them for approval?
They had turned me into a unicorn in the first place.
I’d just invite myself over for a free stay and bite anyone stupid enough to disagree with me.
Professor Yale gestured to someone in the crowd. “Your question?”
“Is it true only virgins can ride unicorns?”
The entire audience cracked up laughing. I wondered if the glass barricade could handle seven hundred pounds of unicorn slamming into it. Maybe if I softened it with a little fire first, I could get through and poke a few holes in the boy.
“I’m sure Miss Gardener would enjoy a midday snack if you’re volunteering. No, virginity will not save you from being eaten by a unicorn. Bailey, please show them your claws. Try not to break the glass, as it is very expensive.”
I charged the barrier, reared, and pressed my front hooves to the glass, unsheathing my claws and tapping them on the slick surface.
I turned my head and exposed my teeth, which were serrated and pointed to better tear meat into chunks I could swallow.
As payback for the virgin question, I snorted flame, too. “Dee-lee-ssshh-us human.”
The front row cleared out so fast I whinnied my laughter. “Run, tay-stee humans. Run.”
To give the kid credit, he didn’t flee although his eyes widened.
Professor Yale cracked up laughing behind me. “Would you care to put your virginity to the test, Maverick?”
“No, thank you. I’m good.”
“Any other questions?”
The students kept quiet, and quite a few of them retreated to the safety of the doors in the back of the auditorium.
“That concludes today’s lesson. Dismissed.”
The place cleared out in record time, and I dropped to all fours, letting out another amused whinny. “They run fast, pro-fess-ur.”
“That they do. Did you really have to threaten to eat them? I’m going to have whiny students in my office complaining I put their precious little lives in danger.
” The old man shook his head. “At least there is good news. You’re testing out as expected.
Whatever gives you your immunity isn’t dependent on your immune system.
A genetic marker, perhaps? Ah, a mystery for another day. ”
I shook out my thick coat and gave my mane a toss. “Who knows?”
“Good question. Something to think about later. Are you ready for a trip? We’re expected elsewhere. As we had to napalm your apartment, the CDC has made arrangements for temporary housing.”
I tossed my head, widening my eyes in astonishment. “Real-ee? Why?”
“Ah, that’s right. You probably don’t remember what we told you while you were ill. We couldn’t neutralize the device with the sprays. It took two rounds of napalm to get it all. As it’s partially our fault you lost your residence, management thought it would be appropriate to make arrangements.”
Since when did a government-run organization like the CDC do anything outside of their contracts? “Im-poss-ee-bull.”