23. This is almost entirely your fault.
TWENTY-THREE
This is almost entirely your fault.
An audience of two curious cops, Chief Hollands, Kevin, who turned out to be a CDC evaluator in addition to a supplier and general busybody, and my grandfather-in-law observed me open the map and spread it out over the hood of Kevin’s pickup.
I pinned it in place with the vial of ink, grabbed the box of chalk, and went to work crushing it against the asphalt.
Dust coated my hand in a thick layer of white.
I hated the feel of chalk on my skin.
Sighing, I glared at my filthy palm. First, I needed to find Audrey’s gorgon dust cache and destroy it. After, I would hunt Quinn down and give him a very stern reminder we would work together when insanely dangerous stuff was involved.
With a little luck of the good variety, I wouldn’t find Quinn at the cache.
How the hell was I supposed to concentrate with so many people watching me? I ground my teeth together, unstoppered the ink vial, and leveled a glare at Quinn’s grandfather. “This is almost entirely your fault.”
“Oh? Who am I sharing the blame with now?”
“My stupid husband!” I thumped my palm on the hood of Kevin’s truck, and the CDC rep winced at my rough handling of his vehicle. “Oh, lighten up. Your big manly truck isn’t going to be damaged from a little love tap like that.”
“But it’s my baby.”
“Men,” I snarled.
“Ah, I understand. This is what my beloved queen speaks of so often. Us men and our ability to infuriate the fairer sex. One day she might remember I’m not a human.”
“Don’t hold your breath waiting,” I muttered.
“You are nervous, little one. Why are you so nervous?”
I pointed at Kevin. “He’s going to take one look at this and turn me into a research subject.”
Maybe wailing over it was a little out of line, but I couldn’t stop myself.
“I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not,” Kevin confessed.
“Don’t mind her, Kevin. She’s had a difficult few weeks, and she’s been poked and prodded enough during her evaluations. It’s fine, little one. First, you are a part of the Quinn family now, so the CDC will refrain from any invasive research. Won’t they?”
Lifting both of his hands, Kevin nodded. “Don’t look at me. I’m just the nice guy with the truck.”
“Just get on with it,” my grandfather-in-law ordered.
I sighed, placed my palm on the center of the map, and closed my eyes.
The ambrosia, pixie dust, sedative, and pair of phoenix feathers ensured I’d face trouble no matter what happened.
If there was a large stash of gorgon dust, phoenix fire might be the only thing capable of destroying it without the CDC bringing out the same sort of crew required for 120 Wall Street’s demolition.
Without napalm, I couldn’t do it as a unicorn—even with it, I wasn’t sure I’d try again.
One napalm bender was enough for my lifetime.
No matter how I approached the situation, I could easily die trying to get rid of any substantial amount of dust.
Why did I always have to be the one making difficult choices? I didn’t want to be the one hunting down dust and destroying it, but I was doing it anyway. I clenched my teeth and concentrated on what I needed.
I needed to eliminate Audrey’s cache of gorgon dust, if it existed. If she was manufacturing it, the operation needed to be destroyed. My palm tingled, and the chalk residue slithered over my hand.
Someone gasped.
I drew in a deep breath, held it until my lungs burned and body trembled from the need for air, and exhaled in a slow, gentle sigh.
When I opened my eyes, I focused on the map.
Blue flames licked at the edges and washed over my arm without burning me.
While the map burned, the fire didn’t consume the paper.
Some would call my magic trickery. I feared some omen lurked in the flames.
The ink remained in its pot, untouched by my power.
Where I wanted to go wasn’t on the map, so I lowered my gaze to the asphalt. Pink, sparkling light illuminated the ground where the chalk had fallen and surrounded my hands in a pale nimbus. Great. I was glowing again. At least the ambrosia’s influence had worn off.
The chalk writhed on the ground in sparkling tendrils, waiting for my command.
“Go,” I ordered.
One day, I would learn how to better control my powers—or at least understand what happened and why.
If my magic worked, the chalk would guide me.
It slithered along the road, stretched out twenty feet, and halted.
Snatching the burning map, I gave it a good shake to extinguish it and folded it up. “If you’re going, get in the truck.”
Fortunately for everyone involved, Kevin’s truck had an extended cab. I took the man’s keys, loaded the box with the phoenix feathers into the back, and got behind the wheel.
Only an idiot would join me, but I had somehow found five of them.
Kevin and the three cops opted for the backseats while Quinn’s grandfather took shotgun.
I cracked up laughing at the loud but brief argument over how four men would fit on a bench made for three.
The two losers were Chief Hollands and his youngest cop.
“Perhaps one of you would like to stay here,” I suggested.
“No,” they snapped.
Chief Hollands ended up sitting on his cop’s lap, and I considered it a miracle I didn’t laugh in their faces. I turned around first. “Buckle up, boys.”
A chorus of curses in the back made me smile, but they obeyed.
Kevin’s truck rumbled to life, and I followed the pink, glittery glow. Since I was using a map as a focal point, my magic would hopefully acknowledge the existence of roads. Maybe one day I’d figure out why it worked.
Then again, maybe I wouldn’t. It was magic, after all.
The trail of pink, glowing chalk led me far from civilization, up a mountain, through a river, and into the woods. The ‘river’ was only a few inches deep, but that didn’t stop me from singing annoying Christmas songs to irk my passengers.
Grandma apparently lived in a stone fortress. I whistled. “Who the hell builds a three-story gothic mausoleum out in the middle of nowhere? Are those gargoyles on the roof?”
“Those are called crenelations, darling girl. And no, those would be petrified incubi and succubi.” Quinn’s grandfather sighed. “How is it my grandson discovered a wayfinder and married her without realizing what she is? How is this even possible?”
Kevin snickered. “Probably the way the CDC had no idea what she was for a decade. You’re no vanilla human, Mrs. Quinn. How naughty of you. Don’t do it again—and come in for a proper evaluation of your talents.”
I had a feeling Kevin would be added to the short list of people I actually liked. “Non-invasive evaluation?”
“We save the invasive evaluations for those with immunities.”
I narrowed my eyes and turned in my seat to glare at the man. “Remember, Kevin. I turn into a unicorn and can breathe fire.”
“I don’t believe in unicorns.”
Annoyance and amusement waged a cruel war, and I ended up cracking a grin. “When you have the seat of your pants lit on fire by an angry unicorn, remember it’s your fault for your lack of belief.”
“You’re going to be so entertaining to evaluate.”
“Any evaluations will have to wait until after she gets her extravagant honeymoon with her groom.”
“What honeymoon?” After killing the engine and pocketing the keys, I shot a glare at my grandfather-in-law. “I was unaware there was going to be a honeymoon.”
“I may have suggested little Samuel plan something nice to distract him. It kept him from attempting to kill people for not finding you faster.”
Kevin chuckled. “Still, I’m pretty impressed, Bailey. That’s the nicest piece of wayfinding magic I’ve seen in my entire life. Direct, best route, no detours, and you even used the roads efficiently. That’s something special.”
I blushed. “Really? It’s not magic. It’s a curse. We’re going to walk inside and bad things will happen. Actually, only the gorgon is coming inside with me. He’s expendable.”
In reality, he was immune to gorgon dust, but I didn’t want to risk anyone else being exposed.
“I regret my inability to petrify your tongue.”
“My life is complete. I have annoyed a gorgon king. Come on, Your Most Royal Majesty, Archambault Quinn. If you end up petrified, I won’t laugh too hard while I’m dumping neutralizer on your statue.
Then again, you would make a pretty decoration.
Curse you and your family’s good looks. I’m a crow stuck among peacocks.
This is not fair.” I threw open the truck door, jumped out, and retrieved the phoenix feathers from the back.
Tucking them under my arm, I marched towards the doors.
Quinn’s grandfather was nice enough to close the driver’s side door for me before following me. “Have you had a psychiatric evaluation yet? If you haven’t, you should have one.”
Nice. I’d been deemed insane by a member of the crazy Quinn menagerie.
“Says the gorgon following me into a building contaminated with gorgon dust. I’ll laugh so hard if you end up a statue.
I’ll never let you forget it. I will call you in the middle of the night, and when you answer, all you’ll hear is my laughter. ”
“You left the meter in the car.”
“Don’t need one. There’s only one way to deal with this sort of problem.”
“Oh?”
“Fire. Lots and lots of fire. Phoenix fire, to be specific. You may want to stand back. Thirty feet’s a single phoenix’s blast radius. I don’t think anyone has ever tried to activate two feathers at the same time.”
I loved when people listened to me, but I wasn’t a fan of Quinn’s grandfather reaching his hand into my pocket to take the truck’s keys. “Hey!”
“I’ll move the vehicle to a safer place while you work. I’d rather not have to explain how we killed a CDC representative and three cops.”
With a light, fast stride, the gorgon returned to the truck, hopped in, and fishtailed the vehicle in his haste to get away. After a few hundred feet, the vehicle disappeared into the trees.
“Cowards,” I muttered.