7. What makes no sense? The entirety of your life? #3
“Much to my relief, yes. You’re not losing any of your CDC certifications with your new employment. Plus you get that salary you’ve always wanted. Please get the bag as soon as you can, and if you could resist the lure of the next dumpster to catch your attention, I’d appreciate it.”
“No. I keep finding puppies and kittens in dumpsters. They need me to save them.”
“Bailey, you’re really going to contract rabies at this rate. You’re a handful without being rabid. Have mercy.”
“No!” I huffed. “Perkette said I could only adopt a kitten for you if I got it out of a dumpster and it met certain requirements.”
“All right. Hold on a moment. I need to step out of the car.” I heard a door shut, and snow crunched. “There’s an issue I need to talk to you about.”
My eyes widened, and I stiffened. “What’s wrong?”
“Remember Cadet John Winfield?”
I did. “From the 120 Wall Street incident? I thought about lighting him on fire and eating him.”
“He tried to sell you to a gorgon hive. Well, several hives. My cousin notified me. I went to speak to the hive today.”
Quinn dealt with threats from gorgons or other non-humans with violence, and if he had a legal option to indulge in violence in other circumstances, he would. He couldn’t tolerate unknown gorgon males coming anywhere near me.
It always ended in a fight Quinn won, and Quinn usually let the other male escape. Usually.
I narrowed my eyes. “Speak?”
He sighed. “Speak. The hive females were wiped out due to disease, and my guess is that it was rabies. They have two kids. When we arrived, the male wasn’t there. I asked Grandfather about it.”
“Sylvester?”
“Yes. Well, he opted to have a look for me.”
“And?”
“Dead or soon to be dead, and he says I won’t be finding the body. The kids hadn’t eaten for several days. They’re asleep in the car. I’ve registered you as the primary contender for adoption, and I’ll be your backup in the match. The girl’s name is Beauty. The boy’s name is Sylvester.”
I loved that the boy’s name was the same as Quinn’s angelic asshole of a grandfather. Then his words sank in, and I sucked in a breath. “You registered us for a match?”
Every time I’d shown interest, everyone had provided a long—and accurate—reason why it wasn’t a good idea, and it involved me shaming entire hives of gorgons and making more enemies.
“Technically, I’m registering you for a match. I’m going to watch unless you actually need me. I wouldn’t want to spoil your fun. I’m going to give those gorgons a fair chance. You said I should be nice to other gorgons sometimes. This is me being nice.”
“It’ll be more fun if you help.”
He chuckled. “I’ll fight in a match or two so you can catch your breath.
If you’re on your own, you’ll better show your determination.
If we fight together, we’ll crush them so thoroughly we won’t be able to prove to the children how much we want them.
It’ll be an unfair fight unless my grandfather goes up against us. ”
I bounced on my toes. “Ask him to. I want to fight him. Please?”
“Bailey!”
“What? You won’t let me fight him when we visit him.”
“There’s a reason for that. He’s dangerous.”
I snorted. “I’m dangerous, too. I eat napalm and breathe fire. And I can run really fast.”
“You’re also banned from eating napalm for a reason.”
I smirked. “Perkette said—”
“No.”
“But she—”
“Absolutely not.”
My smirk widened to a grin. “Homemade—“
“No.”
“Delicious—“
“Nope. Nope, nope, nope.”
“Napalm,” I crowed.
“Don’t eat anything she gives you. She’s a mad scientist. Why did I trust a mad scientist with you? What have I done?”
Giggling, I stomped my feet to help keep myself warm. “If you don’t want me eating her latest fuel-based concoction made purely for my enjoyment, you better come apprehend me, Mr. Police Chief.”
“You just want me to catch you.”
“Yes, please.”
“I have two kids, a puppy, and Perkins in the SUV.”
I laughed until I hiccupped. “I’d say call me if you need any help with that, but I wouldn’t know what to tell you.”
“I’ll be fine. I have more grandparents than I know what to do with willing to help.”
In so many ways, I envied Quinn and his family. They were my family, too, when I could get beyond my wariness. “If my grandparents show up, petrify them.”
“Have you even met your grandparents?”
“Only the ones on my father’s side. They’re assholes. Petrify them.”
“If they threaten you or the kids, I will. I do have to keep it legal. So do you, so no napalm unless it’s a dire emergency.”
I still got a good laugh over how Quinn had managed to get them to overturn my ban on napalm to available in case of dire emergencies. The release of two phoenixes had something to do with the CDC’s willingness to give me napalm if truly needed.
A drunk unicorn on a napalm bender did a hell of a lot less damage than two phoenixes on the loose enjoying their first taste of freedom in their new lives.
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Please be careful with Tiffany’s experiments.”
“I’d say I’m always careful, but I’m really not.”
“Limit your disasters to ones I can rescue you from, okay?”
Typical Quinn. “You’d have to catch me for that to be an option.”
“Already working on that. Are you having a good time?”
“Very, but I think Blizzard might actually be your puppy. He seems like the puppy of a big, manly police chief.”
Quinn chuckled. “I’m going to enjoy myself a great deal when I get my hands on you, Mrs. Bailey Quinn. Run all you want, but you can’t escape me.”
I’d gotten rather fond of the predator in Quinn, especially when he felt he had something to prove. The real winner of the chase would be me. The faster I ran, the more enthusiastic he would become.
“I don’t know, Quinn. I’m pretty good at slipping from your clutches. Can you really catch me?”
“Yes, I can. I’m merely being generous before I capture you.”
‘Capture’ in Quinn’s language might even include one of his ties, which he never wore to thwart my plans to see him in a suit. “Sure, sure. You say that now, but I don’t see you here stalking me.”
“When I catch you, I’ll enjoy listening to you admit how wrong you are. I like it when you beg.”
Whee. “Less talk, more chase. Drive safe, slowpoke!”
I hung up, did a little jig, and dove into the SUV. “Today is the best day.”
“I feel this is a good time to remind you that we went on this road trip because you married an incubus.”
“The faster I run, the better my reward. And damn straight I married my gorgon-incubus doohickey.”
“Did you just call your husband a doohickey?”
“I called him the world’s sexiest mutt once. It didn’t go over well,” I admitted.
“Poor Sam.”
“He looked like he wanted to cry when I called him the sex toy model.”
“You need to think before you speak just a little more.”
I bit my lip. “Was it bad when I said I might be the only woman in Queens who has no need for a battery operated boyfriend?”
“No, surprisingly, that one is okay. You stroked his ego—and I don’t want to know what else you were stroking.”
“One of his cobras, actually. Francisco.”
“You named his cobras?”
“Quinn hadn’t, so I did it for him. Francisco gets nippy without attention.”
“Has Francisco bitten you?”
“Several times. All those little bastards will nip if neglected.”
“You’re immune to them?”
I shrugged. “It stings a little.”
“You know what? Nevermind. You talked to Sam for quite a while. What’s up?”
“He registered us for an adoption match.”
Perkette’s brows shot up. “That’s one hell of a Christmas present. Sam’s notorious about avoiding them to spare the prides of the hopeful hives. He only let you two work the circuit for those unhatched whelps.”
“He registered me as the primary contender.”
She whistled. “I’ll just say congratulations in advance, Mom.”
“The females of the hive likely died of rabies. We’re challenging for a boy and a girl. Quinn said their dad is gone, too.”
“Rabies?”
“I’m worried, Tiffany.”
“I am, too. It’s one thing for it to be hitting the stray cats and dogs, but gorgons?”
“Quinn wants me to stock us with neutralizer. The best grade I can buy.”
“Put in the call and get as much as you can. We’ll do a supply run, look for a big cat kitten for Sam, and then do some investigating.”
“What investigating?”
“Of the source of the rabies, of course.”
“Are you mad?”
“Yes, I am. Two kids are orphaned now because of this. Enough is enough. Let’s put your magic to the test for the good of everyone. If this keeps going, it’s going to get out of hand. Let’s stop it before it gets to that point.”
“Okay. We’ll get the neutralizer first. With my luck, Quinn’s kitten will be rabid, too.”
“Good thought.”