Chapter 23 #3
They lay together then, silent, for a long time.
It was so beautiful to share silence with her.
In the oblivion of a cool night, with the world gone silent around them, he could just as easily slip into the delusion that they were at the dawn of their lives still — two people, nascent still, battling uphill to the peaks of their respective careers, clashing, crossing, and staying — not because fate deemed it but because against every odd, their consciences refused to let go.
His palm trailed down her torso and to her stomach, tracing the welts of her delivery marks, her stretch marks.
They were thicker here, gone paler than her skin.
He caressed them, playing his fingers over them like they were the strings of his guitar.
Her hand came up to trace the scar on his cheek, as if in answer.
As if saying, I gave you this and you gave me these.
“It was my turn to interrogate you tonight,” she remarked, amusedly.
“I am all yours.”
“You usually run the other way when I ask questions.”
“Not anymore.”
He felt the stretch of her cheek, the smile. The moon was full tonight, sieving in through the sheer curtains. Thank god they had the good sense to park Yathaarth’s cot at the foot of the bed, away from any light.
“I will not force you, Atharva. You sound tired. I know you ran an operation today. I also know this operation means something more to you than usual because you kept it from me too. So I won’t ask. Tell me when you are ready.”
“Even if it is something about you?”
“Even if it is something about me. We have divided the loads of our lives. You carry yours until you are ready to share, hmm?”
A happy scoff left his mouth, pulling his hand out of her circles and caressing the apple of her cheek. Her face turned over her shoulder, big brown eyes full of a faith he thought he had seen before but really hadn’t met before today. Atharva dropped his forehead on hers.
“Thank you, myani zuv.”
“For not interrogating you?”
“That, among other things.”
“Today I convinced Sherry to accept my three rewritten chapters.”
He smiled — “What did she say?”
“That she can’t threaten me because I am the CM’s wife.”
Atharva laughed out softly, careful of their son sleeping.
“I am of some use, isn’t it?”
“In addition to your heater capabilities,” she turned and burrowed inside his chest. “Turn the dial up, Janab. It’s getting cold in here,” her warm hands rubbed his back. Atharva embraced her and cursed as her nails scratched up his back to his neck.
“Iram,” he warned.
“What?”
“If you don’t want to go again, then stop.”
“What? This?” She pushed her nails into the back of his scalp.
He pounced on her neck, making her shriek.
“Shhh!” He clapped a hand over her mouth.
They froze, eyes turned to the cot. The cushion tied to the railing shuffled.
Then stilled. Some smacking of lips and what sounded like babbles. Then everything went quiet.
“Phew!” Atharva relaxed beside her. “I swear, you and Arth will give me the hardest adrenaline rushes of my life.”
“And you will turn old with our adrenaline dancing in your veins,” she reached up and kissed his forehead. “Happy birthday.”
Atharva scratched his eyebrow, trying to squint at the wall clock.
“It’s twelve. You are a 38-year-old big boy.”
He frowned. “You didn’t do your one kiss on 1st, two kisses on 2nd thing this year.”
“Excuse me, were you there during that random colic burst of 1st January?”
He chuckled — “He did scare us that entire week.”
“And you told me he never cried.”
“He didn’t! I swear, he didn’t. It’s like he knew I was already fighting the world outside and remained good for me inside. And then when you came, he knew I had you and you had me to get through his tantrums.”
Iram pushed her head up on the headboard, caressing his hair — “Your son has inherited your sense of understanding.”
Atharva blinked up at her. His breath was controlled, slow, relaxed. Even after the day he had, the month he had spent, he got to rest by her lap, talking about everything and nothing.
“What are you thinking?”
“That this is how I want to spend every night.”
“You have been spending every night like this,” she massaged the top of his scalp. “And what you do on your birthday is what you do all year round.”
His mouth quirked up — “Is that true?”
Before she could open her mouth he had pulled her down by the back of her head and pasted a kiss on her mouth.
“Atharva!” She pulled back, red and shocked and looking like her favourite dawn sky.
“Thank you.”
“Again?” Her eyes widened.
“I lost you once, and every time I silence myself in a moment with you, I am reminded that you are god’s gift returned to me again and again.”
Her eyes softened. She pushed his hair back, leaned down and kissed his forehead again.
“Spend your entire day tomorrow with me and you will spend the entire year with me!”
Atharva vibrated quietly. “I wish.”
“Why?”
“I have to go to Kupwara.”
“To this place where they killed the terrorists?”
He nodded.
“But the encounter is still going on.”
“It has moved a few kilometres away to Bangus.”
“How is Altaf letting you go?”
“It’s not a security threat. Don’t worry, myani zuv.”
“How long will you be there?”
“20-30 minutes. From there, I have to visit a military base in Zachaldara.”
She frowned. But did not ask. And in her not asking, he wanted to answer.
“Momina Aslam knows that you flew to Kargil from PoK on that plane.”
Her face froze.
“There is no evidence whatsoever for her to prove it, Iram. Trust me, I will…”
“I trust you,” her eyes vacillated from his face. “But what does this mean? Did she tell you this?”
“On Arth’s Annaparashan…”
“On Arth’s Annaparashan? Atharva, why do you hide things?!”
His brows rose.
“Ok, yes, I let you tell me at your own time. But this is the limit. She came to our house and said this. What did she want from you?”
"I like how you have become a proper politician’s wife,” he held her thigh in his hand and shook.
“But to answer your question — no, she did not ask for anything. Yet. It’s been more than a month and she has gone quiet.
I have been working with Amaal and Captain Husain to slowly build a safety net for us.
This operation was made into a media spectacle to reassert my nationalist agenda.
When I went to Nagar, I made enemies out of a lot of people, including the centre and the defence forces.
Now it’s time to bring them all back to my side, so that even if whispers start spreading, without evidence, they are nothing but slander. ”
“There will not be any believers, Atharva. Nobody can stand behind the idea of you betraying your country in any way.”
But I did skirt around it, he thought.
“I will strive to make sure they are minimised in number. All tracks are covered, all evidence is buried. Faiz came through on his promise as well. Your name has not been uttered out loud there again. But I need this to go away, buried down. Right now…” he shut his eyes, frustration creeping up the back of his neck.
“She is not coming up with her threat, nor is she going public. It’s a purgatory of its own, not knowing. ”
“Shhh,” Iram’s hand pushed between his neck and his pillow, massaging him there. How did she always know what part of him was aching?
“You have dealt with worse situations, Atharva. This is not even the top 10 bad.”
He smiled, eyes still closed. “I agree.”
“She will not be able to remain quiet for long. You are on your way to completing your half-term. If she wants to destabilise you, this is the time.”
“Hmm.”
“Patience.”
He tore his eyes open. “Aren’t you scared?”
“Of what?”
“Of this coming out?”
“You are here.”
His chest stuttered, then swelled, then filled with blood.
“What did I do to make you like this?”
“Brought me to Jammu,” she smiled cheekily. And Atharva laughed, pulling her down and over him. If what happened on your birthday happened all year round then he wanted to do a lot of things to her.