Chapter 7 #2
“Oh.” My brain swims. I barely know what he’s saying. But talking about Ulf stirs something deep inside me that goes beyond thought. An instinctive response.
“Would that be okay?”
I nod. Nervousness crackles through me, but there’s a heated flare of anticipation too.
“I need to hear you say it, Elina. No pressure. You don’t have to agree if you’re not comfortable with it. But if you are, I need to hear the words.”
I lick my lips and swallow. “Yes,” I manage. “It’s okay.”
Asbjorn moves away, and new steps sound behind me. Firm, measured thuds of military boots.
Closing my eyes, I breathe through rounded lips as a wave of something powerful washes over me. It awakens my awareness and heightens my senses. A waft of pine and a characteristic masculine scent drifts past me. I inhale deeply to catch it, wanting more—knowing who it belongs to.
I startle when a hand touches my left shoulder blade.
Not because I don’t like it; because the electricity that sparks is so strong that my entire body starts buzzing with little jolts and shivers.
The hand is rough and calloused, yet the touch is soft and warm.
I easily recognize it, and I welcome it like a long-lost friend, melting beneath it and giving in.
I don’t understand what happens. In a matter of seconds, everything has shifted. I’m not just dizzy or floating anymore. A strange calmness has settled over me, dragging me deep into the fog where my thoughts don’t exist—where my own will doesn’t matter.
“This is going to hurt, Elina,” Ulf says, and hearing my name spoken with his deep, rough voice does strange things to me. “Can you accept that?”
His question pulls at something deep inside me. A reaction I’ve felt every time he watched me. A desire to sink deeper. At that moment, it’s clear what it is. The urge to give up and give in. To let him take control.
I don’t even have to think. Because it doesn’t matter what he’s giving me. All I know is I want it—because he wants to give it.
“Yes,” I say, just barely able to form the word as I drift deeper.
He lingers on my back a minute longer. He doesn’t say anything, but I clearly feel the intent. The praise and the strength he’s imbuing me with.
When he draws a deep, audible breath, I reflexively follow, gripping the chains, knowing what comes next.
He steps back, rests the cane across my ass, then flicks.
The pain that erupts beneath the blow is fire.
Even worse than any Asbjorn delivered. The cane doesn’t carry nearly the same weight as a flogger, but the effect is harrowing.
Precise and sharp. Like a knife. It rips through me with a force that tears a raw scream up my throat and makes my knees buckle.
“No!” I scream when a hand comes to my shoulder, my body preparing for defense. The panic that has erupted in my brain is so sharp that any little touch feels like a threat.
“Shh,” Ulf soothes close to my ear. It’s just his hand touching me, but I feel the heat from his body radiating into my skin, his powerful presence wrapping us into our own little bubble far away from the world—just him, me, and the pain.
I pant and gasp, sniffle and whimper, as tears press behind my eyes.
“You’re okay,” he says in a low voice that carries a steadiness that instills his confidence straight into me.
I’m okay, is all my brain can grasp despite the shock still tearing through my system.
“You’re okay,” he repeats several times.
“I’m okay,” I finally agree, nodding as I straighten and dry the side of my eyes on my shoulder.
“Yes, you are.” Ulf remains a moment longer, imbuing me with his strength through the simple touch of his hand. “I want to do it again,” he finally says. “Will you take one more for me?”
I heave a shuddery breath, expelling my answer on the exhale. “Yes.”
I truly don’t want to. The mere idea of the pain has my legs shaking. Yet, there’s nothing I want more than to take it for him. I don’t understand it. All I comprehend is the praise in Ulf’s voice when he says, “You’re very submissive, Elina. It’s beautiful to behold.”
His words are like one of his kisses. A blessing from the Gods. I soak it up and let it fill me with strength and determination. I’m okay. I can do this, I tell myself as I adjust my stance and my grip on the chains.
Ulf places the cane against my ass. A sharp breath hisses past my lips. And then a scream tears from my throat as the cane strikes my ass, sharp, deep, and harrowing. The pain tears through my system, and my scream keeps going, renewing itself with a force that claws at my throat.
The pain is deafening, ringing in my ears and blinding my eyes. My legs cave in; I collapse in the chains. Tears streak down my cheeks as my whole body—my mind too—coils tight, about to snap.
Hands grip my upper arms, lifting me to my feet, holding me steady.
The sound of a deep breath beckons me to follow.
When I only manage a staggered hiss, Ulf repeats, squeezing my arms urgently as he breathes in.
I try again and manage to draw in a little more air.
One more time and I draw a real breath. Another deep one and the pain dulls.
One more and it fades in the strong pull I feel toward Ulf.
One more and I just want to drown in his control.
“Good girl,” he says softly. “So beautiful. So submissive. I want you to thank me for the pain.”
A small part of my brain registers the absurdity, but the words fall from my lips with a naturalness as strange as the request. “Thank you,” I whisper, and a surge of something warm and heavy overcomes me, making me gasp and sink into the cross—melting beneath the weight of his dominance.
“Thank you,” I repeat, wanting to say it over and over, the gratitude so tremendous I can barely contain it.
Ulf hums. “My pleasure.” He leans closer, his breath warming the shell of my ear. “I haven’t struck anyone that hard in years. So thank you for taking it.”
He holds on to me for another minute before letting Asbjorn step in and wrap his arms around me, letting me collapse into the safety of his embrace while he frees my arms.
“Take good care of her,” Ulf says, like he so often does. But this time, he adds three words that strengthen that submissive pull at the center of my heart and make me sink a little deeper. “She’s very precious.”