Chapter 5 #2
“I get it. You had to focus on your family.” I shrug. “To be honest, so did I. My mom was only getting worse, and the bills weren’t going anywhere. I had to make the most of that opportunity for her and my sisters.”
“Which is exactly where your focus should have been. I mean, yeah, you and I had a great conversation on that roof and—”
“We did more than talk,” I remind her with a wry smile.
She had said I was the first to make her come. That should count for something.
Her eyes snap to mine, a slow smile kissing her lips. “True, and it was…great. It really was, but he’s my brother, and he was at his lowest point. Going out with you would have been salt in the wound.”
“I get that,” I say, nodding. “I wish things could have been different, but I get it.”
“You’re a trigger for him. When you got drafted into the League, he was so bitter. He went on one of his worst trips that week. And when you won your ring…” She shakes her head and closes her eyes. “It was bad. When they did that stupid documentary, he was so upset, we almost lost him.”
“What do you mean?” I ask with a quick frown.
“He overdosed,” she says, her voice hushed, her eyes haunted. “He flatlined, and they revived him. It almost killed Mama, too.”
Hearing that, I’m horrified. I know it’s not my fault, but guilt saws my insides nonetheless. I push away from the table and move to face her, standing in front of her still seated on the table’s edge. “I had no idea.”
“He’s lost everything, Naz. He has two kids with a good woman, but she left when he spiraled again. She had just been through too much. She’s with another guy now, and Cliff is finally getting access to the kids again. He’s piecing things back together.”
“I reached out a few times in the past, but he was never receptive.” I take both her hands in mine. “But if there’s anything I can ever do to help, let me know.”
“Maybe give up on this idea of us going out,” she says softly, half-hopefully.
“We shouldn’t have to.” I tighten my grip on her fingers and shake my head, holding her eyes with mine. “I get why then it was bad timing, but maybe now…it could be right.”
She sucks her teeth but makes no move to pull her hands away. “It’s not worth the drama it’ll cause if Cliff finds out.”
“Not worth it to who?” I ask, stepping closer, filling the small space between her knees. With one finger, I lift her chin, caressing the tiny indentation bisecting the delicate surface. “I’d like to at least see if it could be worth it to me.”
Even now, this close, the pull between us is strong, vital. I lean forward, never dropping her eyes from mine, giving her plenty of time to pull away, to push me away, if she chooses.
She doesn’t choose.
The shorter the distance between our lips, the closer I get, the shorter her breaths come, shallow pants that lift her breasts and coast past her full lips. I’m so close now, we exchange a ragged sigh, my mouth hovering over hers.
“I’mma kiss you now,” I whisper. “Unless you tell me not to.”
Her silence stretches between us, and her lashes drop to cover the emotions swimming in her eyes—curiosity, lust, need.
Guilt.
I press a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth, nibble at the full curve of her bottom lip, lick the delicately drawn bow at the top.
She gasps, her mouth opening the smallest bit.
I take immediate advantage, licking into her, seeking and finding the sweet, slick interior.
She moans, and I suck on her tongue, at first gentle, and then incited by the whimpers slipping from her throat, harder.
I cup her face between my hands, thumbing the smooth skin of her cheeks. The cadence of the kiss changes, intensifies as our movements become more hurried, more desperate. I slide my palms down her neck, over her shoulders and back.
“You feel good,” I mutter against her lips.
I kiss across her cheek and behind her ear, drawing in the clean scent tucked into the cove for me there. “You smell good.”
I trail kisses down her throat, taking the satiny skin between my lips and nipping lightly with my teeth. “You taste good.”
She arches her neck back, offering herself to me.
“I’d like to spend some time with you,” I whisper in her ear. “The date we never got before.”
She stiffens, pulling back and closing her eyes, her lips still swollen from my bites and kisses. “Naz, I can’t.”
“Takira, don’t be ridiculous.”
“I’m not being ridiculous.” Shaking her head, she hops off the table, pushes past me, and grabs her shoes, hooking the heels over one hand. “I’m choosing my brother.”
She walks away swiftly, but it takes no time to catch her. With legs as long as mine, one of my steps equals two of hers. I take her by the elbow at the base of the stairs, turning her to face me.
“That’s not the real choice, Takira. Not me or him. It’s just you and me. He’s a grown man who’s experienced incredible disappointment and made a lot of mistakes. I sympathize with that, but he can’t expect you to pay for them. That’s not fair.”
“It doesn’t make sense, his anger at you,” she says, tugging her elbow free. “His grudge against you isn’t fair, but you’re a trigger for him, and he almost died. Didn’t you hear me?”
“I heard you say he’s been clean for a long time and has a new job.”
“Exactly, and I don’t want jeopardize that because you’re an itch I never got to scratch.”
“Oh, we’re gonna scratch, Kira.”
My words come out soft and certain in a way she may not recognize, but I do.
It’s the tone I’ve heard from myself when I want something badly, I’ll do whatever it takes to get it.
I willed myself to reach beyond my skill the night I subbed for Cliff.
I pushed myself all through college so I would shine hidden among brighter, better talents.
It’s what I required of myself to go from a second-round draft pick to an all-star who, against all odds, won a ring in the League when most never do.
At my words, low and determined, she pauses, one bare foot on the step, and considers me over her shoulder. She doesn’t want me? Fine. But she didn’t kiss me like a woman who didn’t want me back.
Whatever she sees in my eyes, it makes worry knit her fine brows together, and she runs, taking the steps quickly to the next floor before I can warn her that I will chase.
I let her go for now. Over the years, I’ve learned when to pursue and when to fall back, biding my time and playing the long game.
Twelve years is a very long game. It was one kiss.
One conversation. That I could walk away from.
I did. But the kiss we just had? The attraction simmering between us…
that is worth exploring. This isn’t about then. It’s about now.
I follow more slowly, and as expected, there’s no sign of Takira when I reach the foyer.
I glance through the front door someone is holding open and see her standing outside.
I watch her for a few moments before an Uber pulls up and she leaves.
I’ll figure out my next step later. There’s a pattern in my life.
Yes, I’m always ready, prepared when the moment comes, but opportunities have a habit of presenting themselves to me.
I’m just the guy who recognizes when they come and knows how to make the most of them.
Pundits have often drawn parallels between my career and guys like Tom Brady, who, as a sixth-round draft pick, was the back-up quarterback.
When the starter Drew Bledsoe was injured, Brady had to step in.
Seven Superbowl rings later, the rest, as they say, is history.
Preparation meeting opportunity. Discipline making up for deficits.
That’s always been my calling card, too.
I wander outside, grinning when I see my friends lounging by the pool. Lotus is perched on Kenan’s knee. Iris and August are stretched out, entwined on a lounge chair, holding hands.
“You guys are sickeningly sweet,” I say in mock disgust, flopping into an empty chair at the table beside Kenan and Lotus.
“How will you survive all this disgusting sweetness on our bae-cation?” Lotus asks, biting Kenan’s ear and waggling her brows at me.
“Oh, you mean the geriatric cruise.” I chuckle. “Also known as Kenan’s fortieth birthday party?”
“You don’t want a free two-week ride on a yacht in the Mediterranean?” Kenan grumbles, tucking his chin into the curve of Lotus’s neck. “Stay your ass at home.”
“Yeah, Naz,” August says, standing and walking over from the lounge chair. “It’ll be all couples, and we know how awkward that could be for you since you haven’t had a meaningful relationship in, oh…ever.”
“He has a very meaningful relationship,” Kenan deadpans, “with his trainer.”
“Stop teasing him,” Iris chides, joining us at the table. “It’s not his fault he has commitment issues.”
“I do not have commitment issues.” I laugh, leaning the chair back on two legs.
“He just hasn’t found the right person,” Lotus says, narrowing her eyes in that way she has that makes you feel like she’s peeled your skin back and found something interesting. “Though he was all up in Takira’s personal space today.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” I look over the infinity pool, not meeting the curious eyes of my friends. “Tell me more about this cruise we’re going on. Who’s coming?”
“Well, the four of us, obviously. And there’s…” Lotus counts on her fingers silently. “Six couples.”
“And you.” August grins.
“You could always bring a plus one,” Lotus says.
“I don’t have a…” The rest of my denial gets lost in a jumble of thoughts as a brilliant plan emerges. One that formulates as yet another opportunity presents itself.
“So, Lotus,” I say, tossing her a devious grin. “Does she have to know she’s my plus one?”