Chapter 21
Alannah
Idon’t know why I bother trying to call Cas’s phone again, but I’m compelled to, the same as Bonnie trying to get a hold of Sparky.
Zach has been on his laptop for hours and hasn’t been able to track down a single brother.
I go to call Cas again when Zach slams his laptop shut and snatches his phone from the table.
Flashes of Slade doing the same come back to me and I want to cry.
Zach is so like him, and I manage a small smile.
Whoever he’s calling answers fast.
“I need you riding, bring everyone.”
He hangs up and finds me watching him. “Luca’s on his way.”
Instant relief surges through me knowing Luca will be here shortly. He's proved himself more than capable over the last couple of years.
Clearing my throat, I let Holly and Harper know, “Once Luca is here, you can all go home.”
Nina, Kyla, and Kristen aren’t here. Kyla hasn’t been around since Ricky and Pope’s funerals. I don’t blame her all that much, the volume of memories here can scream at you no matter how hard you try to fight them off.
Murmurs of relief float around the bar and instantly it feels like life is getting back to normal, though we’re still a far way off from complete normalcy.
Needing a distraction, I lock myself in Leo’s office and sit in the chair behind his desk.
I let my memories flood back. When Cas was president.
When Michael held the gavel and the times I’d come to find him in this very chair to ask for whatever it was I needed.
I only have two memories of my father in this office but over the years they have become a little blurry.
I cling to them, needing to keep them alive because they are the closest thing I have to his voice.
I drift off, dreaming of the past. All the happy times.
Micky and Flo cooking my dinner after my dad died.
Showing up at my school, cheering me on.
Pope never going out of his way loudly but always making sure I was protected and safe.
And Oak, the guy who would make me laugh until my belly hurt.
He was a father to me even when my father was still alive, and especially after he died. I wake with a start, and it’s dark out.
Standing, I run my hand through my hair and wipe under my eyes. I pull myself together and leave the ghosts of the past where they belong and rejoin the here and now.
Before I turn the corner into the bar, it’s almost like everything is back to how it should be, music playing and the sound of talking and laughing. But as I step around the corner, Zach is the only brother at the bar. It's Harper dancing with Rayna and Gunner.
I meet Holly’s worried gaze, and I nod. I'll deal with her. I pull her to the side, leaving the kids to carry on dancing.
“Are you okay?”
Collecting her breath, she assures me, “Yeah, I’m fine. Why? Are you not okay?”
“Darling, you seem out of sorts. When I gave you your meds this morning, you did take them, didn’t you?”
She looks away and I have my answer. “Harper,” I warn. “You did swallow them, yes?”
“I can’t,” she says and I sigh. “Why?” I ask.
“Because I'm pregnant.”
Normally I would be excited to hear such news, but all I feel is dread. She stopped taking her meds when she was pregnant with Gunner, but she had regular check-ups with her doctor. They kept a close eye on her. Who knows how long we’re going to be here on lockdown.
“How far along are you?” I ask hoping to catch her in a lie.
“About seven weeks. That’s why I haven’t said anything.”
“Does JJ know?”
“No, and now he’s gone, he might never know.”
Mania dances in her eyes, her shuffling from foot to foot, she crosses her arms over her chest and then unfolds them. She can’t stand still, and I think carefully how to approach this. I can’t scare her off. Who knows what she will do.
“Well, congratulations,” I say planting a smile on my face. “Another baby on the way, how exciting.”
“Yeah, exciting,” she murmurs more interested in the music and the kids still dancing away.
“Go join them, I’ll be over by the bar if you need me.”
She twirls away and takes hold of Gunner and Rayna’s hands as she spins them both around. They’ll certainly sleep well tonight. Holly meets me by the bar and asks, “Are you worried?”
“Yes. She hasn’t been swallowing her meds. She says she’s seven weeks pregnant.”
Holly mouth drops open, and her eyes widen.
“She was adamant she only wanted Gunner.”
“I don’t think we should trust it until she takes a test, or we get a doctor’s confirmation.”
“She wouldn’t lie, would she?”
“She’s not thinking straight. In her mind, being pregnant gets us off of her back about her medication. Between us, we need to watch her closely. If she gets much worse, we’ll get her help rather than wait for JJ to get home.”
“Okay, but what constitutes as worse? She held a club full of brothers at gun point not that long ago.”
“That could have been anger and grief. One of us will have to be around her at all times. She gets worse, we’ll notice.”
She nods and goes on to say, “I should tell you something, I might need an ally when Leo gets home.”
Frowning, I ask, “Why?”
“I’m adopting Wolf, and when my husband is here, he needs to sign the paperwork too.”
I wish for five minutes there was nothing exploding into our lives. Sighing, I say, “Okay, start from the beginning.”
She tells me about Annie’s uncle and how he won’t put her in contact with Annie and how he showed up and that Cas was there. He never mentioned this to me before he left.
“So, do you think I’m making a mistake”
“Not at all. I mean, it’s a huge responsibility but we can’t see him out in the world with who only knows or take a chance that he’ll spend his life in foster care.”
Cas should have a level of empathy for the kid, he knows exactly what it’s like to grow up with no family, not even having one person to give a shit about him.
“He’s Shane’s son and he’s not here, but we are.”
Relief washes over her, and she nods. “That’s what I’ve been thinking. Do you think Leo will be pissed?”
“To be fair, he won’t be the one doing the day-to-day looking after him and the cost of another kid has been taken care of.”
“No, I’m going to save that for him for when he’s older.”
“Holly, be serious. Put some money aside, you’ll need it. You already know kids aren’t cheap.”
“If we’re going to raise him, then he won’t be any different to Rayna or Roman.”
The roar of motorcycles drowns out the music, and I'm taken back to waiting for the guys to return from a run when I was a kid. Oak and Micky would always bring back a gift for me, and if they couldn’t find anything I was into, they would load up their saddlebags with candy.
It was because of them I ended up with my one and only cavity.
Kitty was pissed she had to drag me to the dentist and swore she’d set Michael on them if they even bought me a sucker.
My boy walks through the door with his chapter of the Lost Souls Motorcycle Club.
I knew the second I laid eyes on him when he was born that he would grow up to be something special and I haven’t been proven wrong.
Both my sons are someone to follow and when this is all sorted and life is back to its normal daily routines, they will both do great things with this club.
“Mother,” he says walking toward me.
People think Luca is the more serious out of him and Leo, but he isn’t. He’s much more sarcastic.
He wraps his arms around me, and I hold onto him, needing to have one son in my arms for a moment. I pull back and hold both sides of his face. “Find our family.”
Steeling his eyes, he vows, “You fuckin’ bet.”
He presses a kiss on my cheek and heads into the backroom with Zach, his chapter murmuring a greeting as they pass me before following their president.
“Can we go home now, Grandma?” Rayna asks.
“Yes, darling.”
I help Holly with the babies and tell her, “You’re going to need double of everything.”
“It’s all on order.”
With a baby in each of our arms, we turn to look for Rayna and she’s opening the backroom door.
“Rayna!” I call out but she either doesn’t hear, or she ignores me. “I’ll get her,” I tell Holly.
Crossing the bar, I step into the doorway and find her sat on Luca’s lap. A huge map is spread across the table and brothers are distracted by my granddaughter.
“Rayna Jackson, you know you’re not allowed in here,” I admonish her.
“Grandma, I just want to see my Uncle Luca.”
Her baby face usually gets her what she wants but tonight, Luca is here to find her dad.
“It’s late and Uncle Luca is busy.”
This time I know she heard me, so she’s plain ignoring me. She looks to her uncle and tells him, “They think I don’t know someone bad has my dad. You’re here to find him, aren’t you?”
He taps her nose. “You’ve always been too clever, Ray-Ray,” he says, adding, “Don’t worry yourself, I’m gonna find him.” He points at his brothers and continues, “You see these ugly guys, they’re gonna help me.”
“Are they strong like you and my dad?”
Zach snorts. “I’m strong too, Ray.”
“I know.” She grins and he melts.
Luca points at each of the guys and tells her, “They’re not as strong as us, but they’re strong enough to help me.”
A few of them grunt and I smile. “You go listen to Grandma and I’ll come see you when I come home with your dad. Yeah?”
“Okay.”
He kisses the top of her head and then ruffles her hair much to her disdain.
She breezes past me, and I tell Luca, “Let me know when you leave.”
“We’ll do.”
Closing the door, I take a quick breather and reaffirm my trust that my family will be back before too long, and we’ll go on as we always have.