Chapter 27 Harper
Harper
The front door slams open and I jump up from the couch. Roman begins to cry but I relax when it’s Rayna and Holly. Rayna storms up the stairs and her bedroom door slams shut soon after she disappears from sight.
“Where was she?”
Holly dumps a cell on top of the refrigerator and sighs. “On her way to Kristen’s.”
The kid certainly has the Jackson flare for doing what she wants.
“Are you okay if I go over to Alannah’s? I promised I’d go over when you got back.”
“Of course, thank you for watching the babies.”
I hear her, but she’s too far away. I tell her it wasn’t a problem and pick up Gunner.
“Do you want me to save you some dinner?”
“Yes, please.”
I close the door after us and cross the way over to Alannah’s house just as Bonnie is arriving.
“Hey, my little prince.” She holds her arms out and I pass Gunner over to her. “You look tired, darling,” she tells me.
“I can’t remember the last time I slept more than an hour.”
“Your meds?”
“I took them this morning,” I lie.
“I thought you told Lana you couldn’t take them because you’re pregnant?”
“Yes.” I did tell her that, didn’t I. “Have you heard from Sparky yet?”
Narrowing her eyes, she tells me, “No.”
“JJ?”
“No, I haven’t heard from anyone, that’s why I’m here. I couldn’t stop at the house any longer.”
I sometimes look at my mother-in-law and wonder how she copes with a husband and a son in the club, especially during times like these.
“How far along are you?” she goes on to ask.
“A few weeks.” Before she can ask any more questions, I tell her, “Jay doesn’t know yet, can you not mention it to him until I tell him.”
“Sure.”
We head inside and Alannah is sat in the kitchen, staring at her phone.
“How’s Rayna?” she asks.
“In trouble with Holly but in her room and safe.”
She nods and returns to staring at her phone. I still haven’t heard from JJ. Leo still hasn’t found him.
“Should I prepare for the worst?” I blurt out.
Lana and Bonnie look to one another. “He’s coming home, Harper. They all are,” Lana tells me adamantly.
“It’s only a question of when,” Bonnie adds.
I often take huge amounts of advice from them both because they’ve been through everything between them, but this time, I'm not so quick to believe them.
I've lost my mom. I've lost Slade. I'm going to lose JJ. He didn’t even say goodbye to me before he left. I can’t remember our last words or where we were when we spoke them. I have nothing, just like I’ll have nothing when his body comes back lifeless.
I'm going to lose everyone and all I have left is Gunner. I can’t let anything happen to him. I'm his mother and without his daddy around to protect him, I have to step up and take both roles on.
“I should get him back to Holly’s. She's cooking dinner and he needs his bath.” Bonnie puts him down on the floor and I take hold of his hand.
“Say goodbye to your grandmas’.”
“Bye-bye.”
“Bye-bye, darling.”
I feel their eyes stabbing me in the back as I leave.
I stare across at Holly’s house, but it doesn’t feel right to go back there.
If JJ doesn’t make it home, I’ll have nowhere to go, not since I burned down our house with Leo.
Gunner and I will have no one and no home.
We'll be just like Lily and me when I was growing up, and I refuse to let that happen.
Gunner will never know how hard life can be, or how it feels to be alone while having a parent at his side.
I need to find us a home.
Shane's empty house catches my eye. He won’t need it anymore and Annie isn’t coming back.
“Come on, sweetheart. Let's go home.”
“Daddy?”
“No, this is gonna be our home.”
The front door is unlocked and heat blasts us as we step inside. “We’re going to live here now, baby.”
Some of the furniture is real nice, that would have been Annie’s influence, and it comes in handy after I burned all of my furniture.
Gunner follows me around and helps me pack Shane’s belongings. We drag bags and a few boxes outside and I dump them around the side of the house. Back in the house, I rearrange the furniture in the living room and clean the kitchen.
When I'm done, all I can see is the empty fridge and bare cupboards.
“We need food, don’t we, honey.”
My boy nods and I swing him up onto my hip. “You’re getting far too big to be carried, ain’t ya!”
His chuckle fuels my soul. Over in the bar’s kitchen, I raid the cupboards while Gunner sits at the table eating a candy bar. Moving onto the fridge, I grab another bag and take everything.
“Why are you taking all the food?” either Maxwell or Warren asks. I don’t remember which brother is which.
“Cause I need it,” I mumble.
“What the fuck are we meant to eat?”
I couldn’t care less. “Take your ass to the store.”
Picking up my haul, I nod my head, and Gunner slips down off the chair.
Back at the house, I store the groceries away and backtrack to the front door.
I lock it and drag the side unit across and shove it up against the wood.
In the living room, I rip the throw over from the couch and pin it over the window.
I turn the TV on and settle Gunner down on the couch.
Upstairs, I hit the bedding cupboard and take out the sheets.
I work myself around the house and cover every window.
I even cover the back door window. No one will be able to see us now. We'll be safe here.
Curling up next to Gunner, I cuddle him into me, and assure him, “I won’t ever leave you.” I close my eyes and begin to relax for the first time in weeks.