24. Juno
24
Juno
"Sorry about that," Alex said, as they started down the path toward the lake.
"Don't be," Juno said, unable to suppress her smile. "She's great."
"She is, isn't she? I still can't believe she's mine." A note of pride rang through his voice.
The dock stretched about twenty feet into the lake, with a covered seating area, complete with a couple of Adirondack chairs and a table between them, at the end. “Chairs or the deck?” Alex asked.
“Let’s do the chairs while the sun is still up, then move to the deck.”
Alex gave her a sideways look, one brow arched. “Does that mean you’re sticking around until after the sun goes down?”
“I didn’t come all the way out here just to miss the sunset over the lake,” she declared, the flutter in her stomach ramping up at how easy it was to flirt with him now that they were on flirting terms. It made her sad to think of how much fun they’d missed out on having with each other over the years.
"I should warn you," Alex said as he began unpacking the basket and setting out one container after another on the table. “My mother thinks I'm still a growing boy."
Juno laughed, helping him arrange the feast: sandwiches, pasta salad, fresh fruit, cheese and crackers, and at least a dozen sugar cookies decorated with multicolored sprinkles.
"These must be Lena's," Juno said, holding up a cookie with a particularly enthusiastic distribution of rainbow sprinkles.
"Definitely." Alex grinned. "Subtlety is not yet in her repertoire."
As the sun began its slow descent toward the horizon, they migrated to the end of the dock where they spread the blanket on the wooden planks. Alex removed his walking boot and they sat with their legs dangling over the edge of the pier, their feet in the cool lake water. It was exactly as Juno had imagined, the seashell sky above them and its shimmering reflection on the water, the cool breezes cooling their sun-warmed skin, the cicada and crickets starting up their cacophonous choruses all around them, punctuated by the low throttle of bullfrog calls. Conversation flowed easily between them, Juno telling Alex about her plans to expand the coffee shop, and Alex sharing stories from the day with his parents and Lena.
"She asked about you, you know," Alex said, bracing his hands on the deck on either side of him, and leaning forward a little to peer into the water. Then he turned to meet her eyes. "She and Mom were going through old albums and she saw pictures of us. She wanted to know if you were my girlfriend back when we were kids."
Juno’s skin tingled, especially where their shoulders touched. His hand was right there between them; what would he do if she covered his with hers? "And what did you tell her?"
"The truth.” He didn’t look away. “That you were my first love, and that I was an idiot who didn't know how good I had it."
The frank admission caught her off guard. "Alex..."
"I'm not trying to put pressure on you," he assured her quickly, touching her thigh with his pinky. "I just wanted you to know where I stand. After the misunderstandings, the letters, the time that's passed, I feel like we've been given a rare second chance. And I don't want to waste it."
Juno considered his words. Were either of them prepared to jump into this so quickly? Had they given this enough thought? They weren’t the same people anymore, and what if the feelings they so obviously both still had were for the people—the children—they’d been fifteen years ago? How would they know if they didn’t explore them?
"I don't want to waste it either," she said finally, turning back to him. "But we're not kids anymore, Alex. We both have complicated lives. You're just starting to figure out how to be a father.” She hesitated, then added with a wry chuckle, “And I've got Leonard now."
"I know.” Alex shifted on the dock beside her, turning to face her. Then he took her hand in both of his. “I know,” he said again. He met her gaze and held it, and then in a gentle, sincere voice, said, “But I have a feeling those things might actually be easier if we faced them together.”
Juno considered his words. She’d faced all the hard parts of her life completely on her own while growing up. It was called survival. Moving back to Autumn Lake had brought with it a circle of friends, a community that absorbed her with no hesitation, and a sense of no longer being alone in the world. But old habits, old instincts, were hard to break. Inviting someone else into the difficult parts of her life felt both scary and freeing at the same time.
“I might not be very good at this,” she admitted. “I’m not really a team player.”
Alex chuckled good naturedly. “Well, I think you’re very much a team player… as long as you’re the team captain.”
She poked him in the thigh. “You got that right.”
Alex sobered. “I have messed a lot of things up in my life, Juno, but I’m working on changing that. Fixing the mess I’ve made between you and me is one of my top priorities. I’m not asking for promises from you. Like you said, we both have a lot going on right now.” He couldn’t squelch the grin when he glanced over his shoulder at his parents’ house where his daughter was enjoying an evening with her grandparents for the very first time. “But I want to explore the possibility of us. I want to see where this goes, this second chance we have, and I hope you do, too.”
Possibility. It was both less and more than she'd expected—less pressure, more potential. After everything they'd been through, maybe possibility was exactly what they needed.
"I'd like that," she said softly.
With his eyes locked on hers, Alex lifted her hand to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to her knuckles.
"That makes me very happy," he said simply.
The gesture was so unexpectedly tender that Juno felt herself blushing. The Alex she remembered had been passionate but sometimes careless. He'd grown up, just as she had, and like her, his passions had been tempered by pain. Instead of hardening him, though, this man before her was more deliberate, more thoughtful.
They sat side by side, shoulder to shoulder, just holding hands, and as the conversation shifted to lighter topics, Juno found herself relaxing completely for the first time in days. The weight of her father's unexpected return, the shock of discovering Alex had a daughter—all of it seemed manageable here, with the lake stretching out before them and the easy rhythm of their conversation.
Finally, sensing Alex’s growing discomfort, Juno suggested they move to the chairs so he could prop his foot up again. She stood and offered him a hand up.
When he was on his feet, he didn’t let go of her hand, but slowly, gently drew her closer, his intention clear in his eyes.
Juno met him halfway. The kiss was gentle at first, almost tentative, a question more than a demand. But when she moved her hand up to his shoulder, he deepened the kiss, one hand sliding up her arm to cup his fingers around the back of her neck.
It felt both familiar and entirely new—the same electricity she remembered from their teenage years, but tempered now by maturity and shared understanding. When they finally broke apart, Juno was slightly breathless.
"I've been wanting to do that for a very, very long time," Alex admitted, his voice husky. “As in, for years now,” he added.
"I've been wanting you to," Juno confessed, her hand still resting on his shoulder. “For years now.”
They stayed on the dock until the sky darkened and the stars filled the canopy above them. Finally, Alex reluctantly suggested they head back up to the house. "I promised Lena I'd tuck her in."
"Of course," Juno agreed. "I should get home anyway. I've got an early morning tomorrow."
They packed up the remains of their picnic and walked hand in hand back to the house. In the kitchen, Roxanne met them with news that Lena was already bathed and in her pajamas, that Dwight was reading a Hardy Boys book to her. “She’s quite enamored with the mystery-solving gang. And can you imagine? That child has no idea who Scooby-Doo and the Gang are! I told her to ask you about them, Alex.”
"We'll have to watch Scooby Doo and the Loch Ness Monster," Alex said with a nod. "One of my favorites."
"I think you made me watch that back in the day," Juno exclaimed, a sudden flashback of caber tosses, an old Highland castle, and a red-eyed Loch Ness monster being commandeered by two big Scottish lads. "You'll have to let me watch it with you for old times' sake."
"It's a date," he declared, holding up his hand for a high-five.
Alex headed down the hall to say goodnight to Lena, leaving Juno alone with his mother, who was washing the last of the evening's dishes. As pleasant as Roxanne had been that evening, there was an undercurrent of awkwardness between them, a reservation on Mrs. Frampton’s part. She’d felt it as a teenager, but had chalked it up to all of her many insecurities. So to sense it now was unsettling to her. She was no longer that scared, lonely kid in desperate need of a place to belong.
She did belong here in Autumn Lake, just as much as the next guy.
But did she belong with Alex? Could she ever really feel like part of the Frampton family? Or would his mother always hold her at a distance?
"I haven’t seen Alex this happy in a long time," the older woman observed quietly.
Juno didn't quite know how to respond. She offered, "Lena brings out the best in him."
"You both do," Mrs. Frampton said simply. Before Juno could process this, she added, "He was heart-broken when you left, Juno. And then when Jason… when Jason died… well, I think it was just a lot of loss for him to process on his own.”
The words felt censorious, like Mrs. Frampton was somehow accusing Juno for abandoning him. “I—I wish I’d been here for him,” she managed to say. “If I’d known, I would have been.”
“You couldn’t have known, could you?” the older woman replied, and Juno was bemused to hear a note of self-recrimination in her tone. “We knew, though. We knew, and we weren’t exactly there for him, either. Granted, we were a little lost ourselves for a while. For a lot more than a while, to tell the truth.” She dried her hands on a dishtowel and hung it on the oven door, spending an inordinate amount of time straightening it before turning back to Juno. “I don’t think he ever really got over you, no matter how hard he tried."
The frank admission left Juno momentarily speechless. What should she say? I never got over him either? He’s the love of my life? He’s the reason I chose to make Autumn Lake home? But those were all things she should say to Alex first. He deserved to hear them first.
When she couldn’t come up with a response, Mrs. Frampton continued. “I’m glad to see you two finding your way back to each other. It does my heart good.”
"I... we're taking things slowly," she finally managed.
Alex’s mother nodded approvingly. "Slow isn't a bad thing. It gives you time to build something that lasts."
Alex returned then, saving Juno from having to formulate a response. "She wants to say goodnight to you too, Juno," he said.
Touched, and relieved for a reprieve from the uncomfortable conversation with Mrs. Frampton, Juno headed down the hallway to Jason's room. Lena sat cross-legged on the bed, surrounded by the stuffed animals Alex had picked up from his apartment, and with Ralphy curled beside her. She held a framed photo in her hands. Her face lit up when she saw Juno.
"Look at the baby pictures of Daddy and Uncle Jason," she announced, holding up the picture. "They are cuties."
"They sure are," Juno said, sitting carefully on the edge of the bed and studying the picture. Wow. The genes in the Frampton bloodline ran strong. There was no denying that Lena was one of them.
"Grandma says you've known Daddy since you were young like me."
"Well, we met in high school," Juno corrected gently.
Lena considered this. "That's still a really long time." She looked up at Juno earnestly. "Are you going to get married to him?"
Juno bit back a knee-jerk ‘No!’ response and smiled, unexpectedly moved by the child's question. "We’re friends, Lena, which is a really good place to start.” She leaned closer and whispered, “Can you keep a secret?”
“I’m very good at keeping secrets,” Lena declared. Wasn’t that the truth, Juno thought. The child had kept her very existence a secret from the world of Autumn Lake.
“Well,” she continued softly, as if relaying a very important message. “Sometimes friends start dating, and sometimes people who are dating end up getting married. In fact, I personally think that’s the best way a marriage should happen.”
“So you guys are friends. Are you going to date? And then get married?” Lena asked, her tone careful.
Juno studied her, realizing there was more to this question than she’d first assumed. “Well," she began slowly, treading carefully with her words. “Now that Alex has you in his life, I think he’d have to ask you if you were okay with it first.”
Lena looked up at her, eyes wide. “Ask me?”
“Of course. If Alex gets married, that person would be marrying you, too, wouldn’t she? So you’d better be okay with her!” Juno smoothed a curl, so like her daddy’s, away from her face. “You’d better be more than okay with her, in fact. You should probably love her as much as your daddy does, you hear?”
“My mommy never asks me if I like her boyfriends.”
Juno fought back the urge to say something cutting about the woman. Instead, she just reached over and hugged Lena. “Well, I know your daddy, and he will always want to know how you feel, no matter what.”
“You smell good,” Lena said after a few moments of letting herself be held close. “Like coffee and milkshakes.”
Juno laughed. “That’s about the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.”
Lena yawned widely, then settled back against the pillows. “Goodnight, Juno.” Then she wrapped one arm tightly around a large plush ladybug and kissed the top of its head. “G’night, Lena-bug.”
Juno heard a sound behind her and turned to see Alex in the doorway, his expression soft and adoring.
“I sent her that ladybug for her birthday,” Alex explained as Juno joined him in the hall. “She named it after the name I call her and she told me last night that she always kisses it goodnight and pretends it's me kissing her goodnight.”
“Good grief, Alex,” Juno said, pressing her palms to her cheeks. “How can you bear it?”
“Right?” he acknowledged. “I don’t know how kids can do the whole unconditional love thing. She should loathe me, resent me, or think I’m beneath her. It’s really humbling.”
They made some small talk in the truck on the way back to Juno’s place, but mostly, they spent the fifteen-minute drive in companionable silence, fingers interlaced on the console. The radio played 80’s arena rock on a station that, if Juno remembered correctly, had been Alex’s favorite even back in high school. “I can’t believe you still listen to this stuff.”
“It’s all part of my arrested development,” he declared, shooting her a cocky grin. “And it’s inarguably the best music that ever was.” He lifted a fist and mock-shouted, “Long live the eighties!”
Juno wouldn’t let him come up to her second-floor apartment, but he insisted on getting out of the truck and walking her to the stairs. “You go back to your mom’s and get that foot up, you hear?” she ordered, resting a hand on his chest as he stepped in enough to make her feel a little crowded.
“I will.”
She didn’t back up. “And thank you for the lovely picnic. I had a wonderful time.”
“You’re welcome.” Alex took a step closer, resting his injured leg on the bottom step, then shifting so he could lean against the rail. In what Juno recognized as a well-practiced move, he drew her closer, their joined hands twisted loosely behind her back, his other arm wrapping around her waist.
“Wow,” she said drolly. “Smooth move, Don Juan Frampton.”
“It worked, though, didn’t it?” His voice came out husky, almost gravelly as he closed the space between them.
This time when he kissed her, there was no hesitation. Juno pressed into him, her arms sliding around his neck as his circled her waist. When they finally broke apart, she rested her forehead against his, eyes closed, savoring the moment.
"I should go," Alex murmured, though he made no move to leave.
Reality intruded, but gently. Juno nodded, stepping back reluctantly. "Let me know how it goes with the attorney, will you?"
"I will." He kissed her once more, softly. "Goodnight, Juno."
"Goodnight, Alex."
As Juno watched him walk back to his truck, she felt a peculiar certainty settle over her. Whatever challenges lay ahead—her father's return, Alex's custody battle, their own complicated history—they would face them together. The thought should have terrified her, but instead, it felt right.