Chapter 36 So This Is What It Feels Like
Amelia POV
Everything felt... calm.
Which was suspicious.
Very suspicious.
Because my life is never calm.
Something is always happening.
Something is always going wrong.
But today?
Nothing.
No chaos.
No awkward tension.
No avoiding each other.
Just... normal.
And I didn't trust it.
I walked into the kitchen slowly.
Like something might jump out at me.
"This feels fake," I whispered to myself.
"It's not."
I froze.
Of course.
He was already there.
Sitting at the counter like he always is.
Calm.
Composed.
And now apparently just casually responding to my thoughts.
"When did you get here," I asked.
"I've been here."
"That's creepy."
"It's a kitchen."
"That doesn't make it less creepy."
A small pause.
Then,
"You're overthinking."
"I am not overthinking."
"You are."
"I am observing."
"That's worse."
I walked over and grabbed a glass of water.
Mostly so I had something to do with my hands.
Because standing near him now felt different.
Everything felt different.
I turned to face him.
"...So."
"So."
Silence.
Oh my god.
Why is this awkward now.
It wasn't awkward yesterday.
Yesterday we literally kissed.
Multiple times.
And now I can't even stand properly.
"This is weird," I said.
"It doesn't have to be."
"It is."
"Why."
"Because everything changed."
"Yes."
"And you're acting like it didn't."
"I'm not."
"You are."
A pause.
Then he stood up.
And walked toward me.
Oh.
No.
No no no.
Too close.
Too fast.
My brain stopped working immediately.
"We didn't make it complicated," he said.
"We didn't panic."
"I panicked."
"You always panic."
"That is true."
He stopped in front of me.
Close.
Not touching.
But close enough that it still felt like something.
"And yet you're still here," he added.
My heart did that thing again.
"Yes."
"Why."
I looked at him.
Because of you.
I didn't say that.
Instead I said,
"I don't know."
He didn't push.
Didn't question it.
Just nodded slightly.
Like that answer was enough.
And somehow...
That made it easier.
Silence again.
But not uncomfortable.
Just quiet.
Peaceful.
Then I said,
"...So what are we now."
He didn't hesitate.
"We're together."
My brain paused.
"...That was very simple."
"It is simple."
"It doesn't feel simple."
"That's because you overthink."
"I do not... okay I do."
He almost smiled.
Almost.
And I noticed.
Of course I did.
"You're doing it again," I said.
"What."
"That almost smile."
"It wasn't a smile."
"It was close."
"That doesn't count."
"It counts to me."
A small pause.
Then softer,
"You should smile more."
He looked at me.
And this time...
He actually did.
A real one.
Not small.
Not hidden.
And I froze again.
Because it still affected me.
Way too much.
"You need to stop doing that," I said quietly.
"Why."
"Because I forget how to function."
That made him laugh.
Actually laugh.
Not just a breath or a small reaction.
A real laugh.
And I just stared at him.
Completely gone.
"That's new," I whispered.
"What."
"You laughing."
A small pause.
Then he said,
"You do that."
My heart melted.
"What."
"That."
"What."
"You make things lighter."
That again.
Why does he keep saying things like that.
I looked away quickly.
"Stop being nice. I don't know how to respond."
"You don't have to."
"That's worse."
Before I could say anything else...
Footsteps.
Loud ones.
Ryan.
Of course.
He walked in, looked at us, and immediately stopped.
"Oh."
Oh no.
"Oh?" I repeated.
"Oh," he said again. "So this is happening."
"Yes," I said. "This is happening."
He looked between us.
Then grinned.
"This is very entertaining for me."
"I'm glad you're enjoying my emotional instability."
"I am."
Clara and Sophie walked in right after him.
Perfect timing.
Clara looked at me.
Then at Dominic.
Then back at me.
"...You look different."
"I feel different."
Sophie smiled.
"Good different?"
I hesitated.
Then smiled a little.
"Yeah."
Good different.
Ryan clapped once.
"This is beautiful."
"Stop talking," I said.
"No."
Sebastian walked in last.
Calm as always.
He looked at all of us.
Then at Dominic.
Then nodded once.
That was it.
That was his reaction.
I smiled slightly.
"I like him," I whispered.
"He likes you too," Ryan said loudly.
"I was whispering."
"I don't whisper."
Of course he doesn't.
Noah ran in suddenly.
"Amelia."
I immediately looked down.
"Yes?"
He grabbed my hand.
Like always.
Then looked at Dominic.
Then back at me.
And smiled.
That small, quiet smile.
And something about it...
felt like everything was okay.
Like everything worked out.
Like this...
was exactly where I was supposed to be.
I looked up at Dominic.
He was already looking at me.
And this time...
I didn't look away.
Because now I didn't have to.