Chapter 11
Chapter
Eleven
Soft beeps from the heart monitor blended with the buzz of the fluorescent lighting. The smell of antiseptic clung to everything, including our hands, since Maddie and I had to wash before taking up residence on the ugly beige couch across from Shar’s bed.
None of it mattered. Because Shar was cradling the most perfect human I’d ever seen against her chest, her hair plastered to her forehead in wet curls, cheeks flushed, eyes half-mooned with exhaustion and triumph.
Shar was glowing. Not metaphorically, but literally.
Sweat and joy and an otherworldly shimmer.
The baby stretched, tiny fingers unfurling and clenching. The three of us held our breath, enraptured.
Carter Robert Thompson. Born at 7:05 pm, nineteen inches long, and weighing seven pounds, eleven ounces. Those numbers meant nothing to me, but I had already memorized them.
“I can’t get over how small he is,” Maddie whispered, leaning close.
We’d both had a chance to hold him after Shar lied to the nurse and told her we were her blood sisters to get us into the room.
She looked skeptical, but Maddie held her ground, daring her to make things awkward with a racial comment.
Maddie told us after that she had an adoption sob story all lined up, just in case.
Rob’s voice filtered in from the nurse’s station right outside the door. “Yes, his name is Carter Robert. No, you’ll have to wait—yeah, wait til tomorrow . . . “
Shar sighed, beaming. “He hasn’t stopped since Carter arrived. I swear, he’s called every single person we’ve ever met.”
Carter stretched then, his face scrunching like he was in the middle of a bad dream. Maddie made a noise like a wounded goose, and Shar smoothed the little creases between his brows with her fingertip.
“Shar? Babe?” Rob stuck his head in. His eyes were bloodshot, his shirt inside out. “Your mom wants to know if three o’clock is okay tomorrow.
Shar grinned. “Yes.” As soon as Rob left, her smile slipped. “I feel so bad.”
“About what?” Maddie asked.
“He’s calling my entire family, and he has nobody.” Her eyes grew glassy. “Here we have this perfect miracle, and he can’t even share it with anyone.”
That sobered me. Rob lost his mom when he was young, and his dad was a deadbeat if I remembered correctly. “What about his siblings?”
Shar shrugged. “I’m sure he’ll try them. Maybe his sister. Their family just isn’t close.” She chewed on her lower lip, then lowered her eyes to Carter. “We’re going to change that. We’re going to have the closest, best family. Rob deserves that.”
“You’re going to have more kids?” I asked.
Shar’s face lit up. “Are you kidding? I’d do this again in a second.”
Maddie laughed out loud. “Are you remembering the last three hours? Rob said he’s never heard you scream like that.”
Shar scoffed. “I mean, a watermelon was coming out of my hoo-haw. Hell yes, I screamed.” She kissed the top of Carter’s head. “Totally worth it.”
My eyes misted up.
Shar lay back against the pillows, eyes fluttering between us and the baby like she couldn’t get enough of any of it. For a moment, the three of us just breathed, revelling in the soft hush around us.
It didn’t last nearly long enough.
“So are we going to talk about the picture?” Shar looked up with a glint in her eye.
Damn it. “You saw that?”
Maddie’s eyes widened. “I only saw it because Chase has a Herald subscription.”
“Well, so does our next-door neighbour, Mrs. Makar, and she’s also out of town. Rob went to bring her paper in so it wouldn’t get wet when the snow melted.”
“Do you think everyone saw it?”
“No,” Shar said, right as Maddie said, “Maybe?”
I didn’t know if it was the hospital room or the sheer perfection of Shar and Carter sitting in that bad, but the emotional dam I’d built talking to Maddie burst in an instant. Tears filled my eyes. “I’m an idiot.”
Maddie scooted closer, pulling me against her.
I told them everything, and I mean everything. Starting with making out with Garrett over the summer, because that shameful secret had been living in my body unchecked for too long, and then the rest came tumbling out.
How alone I’d felt after they both got together with Rob and Chase, how I’d tried to make new friends, to hang out with Tash and her group, but it didn’t feel the same, and I missed them, but it wasn’t their fault because of course it wasn’t, and then the whole deal with Logan.
How he called and wanted to help, and I was a complete self-righteous D-bag to him, and then I pulled the most selfish move without owning up to it.
How I’d wanted to keep it a secret because it was Logan and it wasn’t even real and I never in a million years wanted to hurt Shar, but I didn’t know what I was going to do after graduation and I felt like a complete and utter failure, and now I was selling my soul to get in with Norman Marcus who I was quickly finding out was also using me to link up with Douglas for grant money.
“The whole thing is a pile of steaming dog poo, and I’m the worst friend in the world!” I finished with true dramatic flair.
Shar and Maddie stared at me a moment, stunned. Then Shar let out a breath. “Wow.”
“I know!” I splayed out over the back of the couch like a dying fish.
“No, I meant, wow, like this is an amazing opportunity, Crys.”
I lifted my head, skeptical. “That’s what you got from all that?”
Shar didn’t miss a beat. “Yes! Let’s be strategic, here.
If Norman—super weird that he has the same name as my dad, by the way—is using you, then why shouldn’t you use him back?
And this is helping Logan, too, right? So why the hell not?
Men do it all the time, so why can’t we use a relationship to our advantage? ”
I blinked. That was a very good point. “But it doesn’t bother you? Me showing up like that with Logan? It wasn’t real AT ALL—”
“I know!” Shar laughed. “And yeah, I won’t lie and say it doesn’t tweak something in me to think of you two spending time together. Not because I have a problem with it, just because . . . I don’t know.” She pondered for a moment. “I think I just don’t want you to get hurt.”
I snorted. “No worries there. We have rules.”
“What?” Maddie laughed.
“Yep. No touching unless absolutely necessary, only four events until the opening, and then we’ll have an amicable break up.” I mimed washing my hands of him. “He’ll get his PR credit and make his mom happy, I’ll hopefully have a job offer—”
“Yeah, this is a win-win,” Shar said.
Maddie nodded in agreement, her brows still pinched. “I’m just . . . so sorry, Crystal. I had no idea—”
“No, please. I promise, this is a me problem.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s not. I know it’s not our fault, I get that, but I didn’t think about how our relationships affected you. I want to be better.”
“But Chase needs to be your priority.” I pointed at Carter. “And your two guys need to be yours.”
Shar’s face screwed up. “Yes. But you’re family, too, Crys. I agree with Maddie. We need to make this work.”
Tears rolled down my cheeks, and I pulled Maddie up from the couch for a true group hug plus one brand new, tiny human.
As soon as we pulled back, Rob pushed through the door, a tired smile on his face. “Alright. What’d I miss?”