11. Declan Foster
11
DECLAN FOSTER
Parker was never going to let me live that down.
I hadn’t been prepared for such a noxious odor to come from such a tiny child. How could anything that adorable and innocent make such a smell? It could have been classified as a war crime if used against someone.
And somehow Parker had remained unfazed. The lunatic’s laughter had chased me out into the hall and seemed to echo through the house.
When I got control of myself and edged into the bedroom, Parker was pulling Joy’s pink shorts on. The worst of the smell had disappeared along with the offending diaper.
The next several days passed quietly as I grew more accustomed to having two guests for meals. Joy was generally well behaved, though she was quite clear about the foods she didn’t care for, no matter how hard Parker tried to get her to eat them. Joy would never be a fan of brussels sprouts.
I tried to stay away from Parker and Joy, giving them space to be comfortable in the house. I was afraid that if I continued to hover, Parker would feel as if he needed to hurry and find a new place to live, and that wasn’t what I wanted at all.
But why was I so eager for Parker and Joy to remain here ?
That didn’t make sense.
However, I didn’t let myself poke at that shadowy area of my mind too much. All I knew was that the thought of Parker and Joy leaving sent up feelings of panic while my heart squeezed to the point of being crushed.
No, it was better if they stayed here. It was easier to watch over them both. That was all it was. I was worried about their safety.
Near ten on Wednesday evening, I left my hiding spot, putting my book aside in favor of a nightcap before bed. As I crossed through the house, I found Parker sitting in the center of the living room floor, his hands braced behind him and his legs stretched out while he stared at the large, two-story white wall.
“Is everything okay?” I inquired as I hesitated in the doorway.
“Yep.” He flashed me a broad smile and held up a tumbler with a dark red drink. Ice clinked softly against the sides. “You should ask Franks to make you a bay breeze. It’s tasty. Mine’s a virgin, but I’m sure he can make you a real one.”
“Why didn’t you have an alcoholic one?” I knew for a fact that Parker enjoyed having a drink every once in a while.
“I’m not comfortable drinking around Joy yet. Everything is still so new with her. I want to be sharp in case there is a crisis. Even the idea of being buzzed makes me nervous.”
That made sense. I stepped into the living room. “I can monitor Joy if you want to have a drink,” I offered.
Parker was quick to shake his head. “Nah. I’m good.”
“I’m sorry I haven’t gotten a proper lesson completed for diaper changing.”
A bright bark of laughter jumped from Parker as he tossed his head back. “No! Don’t be sorry. I’m pretty sure I had the same reaction as you when I changed Joy’s first poopy diaper. My dad almost fell over laughing at me. You get used to it…sort of. ”
“Can I try again?”
Parker’s smile softened into something so very sweet that sent goose bumps down my arms. “Of course. We’ll make sure it’s an easy one next time.”
I hesitated, no words coming to me, not sure whether I should stay or leave him to his quiet moment alone. Thankfully, Parker solved the problem for me.
“Sit. Talk to me for a while without worrying that the world is going to fall around our ears.” Parker lifted a hand and waved me toward him. But I had no desire to sit on the floor. I crossed to the chair closest to him in his line of sight and sat. However, my butt had barely touched the cushion when I shot up again.
“What about the baby? What if she wakes up?”
Parker grabbed a small white box sitting next to him. He raised it and gave it a shake. “Your shopper was wise enough to include a baby monitor. If she wakes up, I’ll hear it.”
With a grunt, I returned to my seat. “Did you discover anything missing? Is there anything that you or Joy need?”
My companion smirked and shook his head. “Not a thing. I think I’m better supplied now than I was prior to the fire, and I’d been sure that Molly bought Joy every baby gadget and gizmo under the sun.”
“Good. That’s good.”
“Declan…”
There was a weight to his voice that made every muscle in my chest tight. My hands were folded together in front of me with my elbows on my knees, and they fisted as I waited for him to continue.
“Everything you’ve done for Joy. All those fucking clothes for me. I don’t?—”
“Please stop thanking me. It’s the only thing you say to me now. I don’t want you to feel beholden to me.” I paused and licked my lips. “My friend was in trouble due to no fault of his own, and I stepped in to help. Anyone with the means would have done the same thing.”
His full lips twisted into something that seemed cynical and hard to describe. “Friend. I like that. Prior to all this happening, I’m not sure you would have called me that. I drove you crazy in the office.”
“On purpose,” I growled. I might not generally pick up on all the basic social cues, but I knew Parker had been going out of his way to irritate me.
“True. But when we saw each other outside the office, it was only for sex. Nothing else.”
“We talked. Some.” My fingers had relaxed, but they were starting to ball up. “I’m just not…good…at conversation.”
Parker huffed and grabbed his drink to swallow half of it. “You converse fine. Whoever convinced you that you don’t is a fucking idiot.” He set his glass on the floor and returned his eyes to me. “Plus, you let me ramble on about stupid things like my art.”
“Your art isn’t stupid.”
Parker’s rough laugh drifted through the room, and I straightened. “You never even saw my art.”
“Just a little from the doorway, but from how you talked about it, I knew it was important to you. The most important thing to you. That means it’s not stupid.”
The slow smile that spread across Parker’s handsome face was like watching the sun rise over the ocean, bright and sparkling. “And you think you’re not good at conversation.”
I looked away from him, no longer able to hold his gaze without the feeling of heat creeping into my ears and cheeks. But I held on to the image of that smile in my mind. I wanted to do everything I could to keep that same expression on his face all the time. The world was a better place because of that look.
Parker continued, oblivious to how he was changing my life one smile and kind word at a time. “I know you’re not rushing Joy and me out the door, but I promise we won’t overstay our welcome. The apartment complex seemed confident that they’d have the paper work people needed pulled together on Monday or Tuesday. I think they’re trying to get some report from the fire department first. Then, the insurance company thinks it will be only a few days after they get the paper work to cut me a check to cover all my household items. I figure on Monday, I’ll start searching for a new apartment and a new job.”
“You could…wait…” The words tumbled from my lips awkwardly, like a landed fish trying to flop its way back to safety.
“Wait? Why?”
I kept my eyes locked on the floor. Sometimes it was easier to say things to Parker when I didn’t have to meet his gaze. “You’ve been through a lot recently. You lost your best friend, gained a daughter, and lost your home in a fire. Maybe you could not do anything for a while. Stay here. Spend time with Joy. Let yourself recover before rushing off to the next thing.”
Parker said nothing. The silence stretched until it filled the massive room, forcing me to finally look up at Parker. This time, he wasn’t staring at me, but at the blank wall again.
“It’s tempting. I would like to spend some time with Joy and sneak in some more reading about babies. Molly used to text me all the time about the books she was reading, so she’d be ready. It would be nice to not always feel like I’m completely lost.”
My eyebrows puckered on my forehead, and I shook my head. “You don’t appear lost to me. You know when to feed her and how much. You’re very good at changing diapers. She’s always laughing. I might know nothing about babies, but she seems happy to me.”
“Thanks. My mom gave me a crash course in babies the week she was in town, and Molly left behind a lot of notes in Joy’s baby book about things she liked. It’s helped.” Parker sat up and tossed back the last of his virgin bay breeze. He lowered his glass, and the ice clinked loudly. “But I think I’d go stir crazy if I wasn’t working. Not that I’m in a big hurry to return to the world of cubicles and suits.” He took a long look at the empty glass in his hand and I got the feeling he wished he had another bay breeze, but not a virgin one.
“After you finished with Courtland, you didn’t intend to get another office job, did you?” I asked as I dug through memories of old conversations we had. “I can’t remember exactly what you said, but I always thought it strange that you weren’t trying to get a permanent position with Courtland Enterprises.”
Parker’s expression instantly morphed into a wicked grin. “Do you really want me working in your department?”
“No.”
His cackle jumped from him, pushing out the remnants of the heavy silence we’d suffered not long ago. “No hesitation whatsoever.”
“You were a good worker and very smart. I would be happy to give you a reference, but you were also annoying and disruptive.”
“I did that on purpose, you know?”
“Yes, I know. Please try not to be so smug about it.”
Parker did a weird scooting crab-walk shuffle across the floor to sit with his back against the chair I was in so that his shoulder was now on my leg. “I would imagine if I got a job there, you’d demand that we stop having sex, too.”
“Yes. We should have stopped while you were a contract worker. I still can’t believe I let you convince me to continue.”
“I know!” Parker drawled. “Especially since your friend was going through the entire scandal about dating his assistant.” He leaned his head on my thigh so he could stare up at me. He waggled his eyebrows and a lewd grin spread across his lips.
I shoved Parker’s shoulder, sending him almost completely toppling over as he snickered. “Asshole,” I grumbled, which made him laugh even harder.
The whole thing was a mess. One of my managers had brought him in as help while two employees had been on overlapping maternity leave. I hadn’t realized he’d taken a contract position with Courtland until it was too late. Of course, everyone had raved about how amazing he was. What was I supposed to do? Come out and announce that he couldn’t work at Courtland because we fucked almost every weekend?
Then every time I’d tried to put our arrangement on pause, he’d lure me into his bed like some goddamn siren. No, an incubus.
However, I might not have been trying too hard to avoid his bed. A good start would have been not going to his apartment. But no, I’d let him sweet talk me into continuing because it had made the sex so much hotter.
Naturally, the Sebastian and Byron thing exploded in our faces, making me feel guilty. I still didn’t have the balls to admit to Sebastian that I had been hiding a similar mess from him.
I sighed loudly, and Parker brought his giggles under control.
“No, my plan was not to get another office job or contract after Courtland. I wanted to work full-time as an artist. That gig at Courtland was to top off my savings. I had everything budgeted to cover a full year of working as an artist. There was enough money for rent, food, insurance, etcetera.” He stopped, holding his empty hands out in front of him as if he were gesturing at the universe and its twisted plans.
“But then Joy changed things,” I finished for him.
“In a big way.” His hands fell into his lap with a loud slap. “Adding her to my insurance was expensive. Daycare is fucking expensive. Diapers! Oh, my fucking God. Diapers and formula and clothes she’s going to grow out of in a month. It’s all so expensive. I don’t know how Molly was doing it on her own.” Parker dropped his head so that it rested on my leg. “It’s crazy. Molly had a fantastic life insurance policy that she named me the beneficiary of, but I know Molly would have preferred that money go toward Joy’s future. I had it all put in a trust for her. It’ll be for her college tuition. If there’s any left over, it can help her get a good start on her own. But I’m not touching any of that now.”
“So, you’re planning to give up on the dream of being an artist full-time?” Something about saying that sentence left a foul taste in my mouth.
“Postpone,” Parker corrected. “I figure once Joy gets to middle school or at least high school, I’ll have some more time on my hands and I’ll be able to do some smaller projects, but I probably won’t feel comfortable doing it full-time until she’s in college.”
“What kind of art do you do? Paintings?”
“Some, but most of my work is on a really grand scale.” Parker leaned to the side and dug his phone out of his pocket. With a couple of swipes, he had the gallery pulled up, and he was swiping through picture after picture of these wonderful works of art. Few were on canvas, but most were these enormous creations that stretched across an entire wall and soared more than two stories. They were largely abstract works of swirling colors that evoked such emotions. There was also a scattering of portraits, but he swept past those quickly to his larger works.
I had collected some pieces of art on the recommendation from investment managers who’d seen them as a way to diversify my portfolios, but that was all they were—investments. One day, I would sell them for a profit. I’d felt nothing when I bought them, and I’d feel nothing when I sold them.
But Parker’s art was different. It was bold, elegant, and magical .
“I want to hire you.” The words were out of my mouth before my brain could catch up to what I was even thinking.
Parker chuckled and continued to swipe through his photo gallery. “You’re crazy. You know I won’t stop giving you shit at the office, even if I am living here.”
“No. Not at Courtland. I mean, I want to commission you as an artist. I want you to cover the walls of my house with murals.”
Parker sat up and twisted so he could look me in the eye. “What? You want me to paint murals for you?”
“Yes.” This time my voice was a lot stronger. The idea had taken me by surprise, but with each passing second, it made more sense. It would take Parker weeks, if not months, to paint all my walls. During that time, he would live here, allowing him to set work hours that were best for him and Joy. By having him here, I would have the chance to figure out this new need to keep him close.
Taking care of Parker and Joy had given me a level of happiness that I’d never felt, and I didn’t understand it. But I also didn’t want it to stop. I didn’t want to stop feeling this happiness when I was with Parker. Yes, Joy sent me into spirals of panic and cold sweats while suffering flashes of chilly memories of my father’s distance and disdain for everything. I might never have planned to have kids of my own. However, I knew I didn’t want to turn into my miserable, disapproving father.
Parker and Joy had to stay here.
“All my walls are white. You have plenty of blank canvases.”
My companion dragged his wide-eyed gaze away from me to peer up at the white walls that surrounded us. He rubbed a hand across his parted lips, and I swore I could almost hear the wheels turning in his head. They had to be such a temptation. Just one seemingly endless wall after another of plain, unbroken white. The possibilities were enormous .
“It…it would take me months to do your entire house. I…” Parker whispered, sounding as if he were talking more to himself than me. His face whipped around to me, his eyes narrowing. “We’re talking original works of art. I don’t take specific requests. People give me a vibe or maybe a color scheme, and they accept what I create for them. My expertise and talent don’t come cheap.”
“I wouldn’t expect it to. I’m offering ten million to paint my house.”
Parker sucked in a breath so loud and sharp, he choked on the air. I patted him on the back as he hacked and fought to clear this throat.
“This house has twenty-five rooms, not counting hallways and servants’ quarters. If you include hallways, that number can be rounded to an even thirty. That averages out to be roughly three hundred and thirty thousand dollars per room. In addition, the expectation would be that you would live here with Joy while you’re working on the rooms, so that you can set your own schedule around Joy’s needs. Naturally, if you’re living here, your living expenses would be covered by me as part of your payment, but outside the ten million for the artwork. After the contract is signed, you would receive two million as a down payment and additional payments would be made as each room is finished.”
Parker stared wordlessly at me as if he didn’t quite know how to react to my offer. I couldn’t blame him. It was very sudden. Prior to this moment, I’d had no plans to paint any of my walls. I didn’t care if they were white. They were that way because I didn’t want to put too much thought into trying to match things like my furniture and other decorations. When I’d had the house built, I’d wanted it simple and neat.
But after seeing Parker’s art, I wanted more. I wanted all those emotions he evoked in the sweep of his brush in my home. They needed to be in every room. Everywhere I stared, his beauty needed to be there .
“I…I want each mural professionally photographed so I can officially include it in my portfolio,” he stammered, but his voice grew stronger as he continued. “And I demand that it be put in the contract that you can’t paint over any piece for a minimum of five years.”
I had no intention of ever destroying his work, but I understood Parker’s desire to have it included in the contract.
“I agree with that. Anything else?”
“No. Yes. I don’t know. I’m still thinking.” Parker shoved to his feet and paced away, but as he moved, his gaze kept straying to the pristine white wall broken only by the windows that looked out onto the backyard.
Just as I was about to open my mouth to tell him to sleep on it, Parker spun around to face me, his expression full of excitement.
“I’ll do it.”
“Really?” I hadn’t expected him to decide so fast. My heart flipped over as I slowly pushed to my feet.
“Why the fuck not?” Parker laughed, throwing his hands up in the air. “It’s a shit-ton of money for me to do what I love. I’d make more than enough to give the full-time artist thing a go for a few years, even while putting Joy in diapers. If I can’t figure out how to be a professional paid artist by that point, I’ll go back to wearing a tie and crunching numbers for corporate stiffs with a smile on my face.”