Chapter Six
Adelaide
First thing in the morning at the shop, we get a couple who want matching tattoos. Damon takes the husband, and I tattoo the tiny koi on the wife’s wrist. When they hold hands, the two fish look like they’re circling each other.
We’ve just finished up and sent them on their way when Poe comes in looking pissed.
“Oh no, you don’t,” I snap my gloves off with a frown.
Poe glances up, confused. When he sees my glare, his eyes narrow on me. He crosses his arms and plants his feet.
“You walk out and come back in happy to see me, junkyard dog.” I shake my finger at him sternly.
“I have to go to LA.”
I blink at him, my heart dropping at the news paired with his disgruntled expression.
My first instinct is to grab onto him and not let go. I want him with me, not running off to another state.
That’s a bit crazy for a one-day-old relationship. I need to keep that under wraps until it’s too late for him to run.
“To live?” I press with a raised eyebrow of mockery.
“No,” he frowns at me. “For work.”
“Then stop being pissed. I’ll be right here when you get back.” I brush it off and start cleaning. Trying to distract myself from the sudden what-if thoughts.
He’ll be in another state. He takes pictures of super-hot models or scenery. He’s told Damon that. I’m dying to know which it will be this time, and not bold enough to ask. Nobody likes a whiny girlfriend.
I notice Damon’s glare and give him a defensive shrug.
I’m trying to hide the fact that I don’t want him to go. Putting on a brave face won’t hurt him.
Poe stomps toward me with a glower, and Damon decides he needs to get himself a snack. He practically sprints to the back office, but I notice he leaves the door cracked so he can listen.
Poe doesn’t spin my chair to force me to face him. He leans over me like a waiting thunderstorm.
“That’s it? Just, oh well, he’s leaving? You’re not going to ask how long? With who? What I’m doing?”
My back stiffens up. I want to ask him a million questions, of course. My ex used to curse me for it, thinking I was being a jealous girlfriend. That lesson was learned the hard way.
“It’s for work, not fun,” I try to dismiss, focused on cleaning as slowly as I can.
He leans down, breathing heavily into my ear. “Ask me. Show me what this means for you.”
The dark command has my mouth babbling in seconds.
“Who with? What are you doing? Are you going to visit anywhere cool? What are you taking pictures of? Please say scenery of the non-human variety, or I’ll lose it. Privately, where the only witnesses are trash cans I can knock over. When’s your flight? Do you need a ride? A bodyguard? Chastity belt?”
His breathing relaxes after the third question. When I keep going, he starts chuckling in surprise.
“That’s so much better,” he mutters and kisses my temple. “Don’t brush me off, ok? I don’t mind that you’re touchy-feely or that you’re in this relationship enough to question me. I like it. Need it. That will be your second tattoo on your ass.”
I chew my lip for a second. “Are you going to answer me? Minus the bark.”
He laughs right in my ear, making me pull away. He follows to make sure his mockery of my fake bravado gets heard.
“I leave in a few hours. Alone. I don’t need a ride. I’ll stay for two days, taking pictures of a male model. No belt needed. I’ll be in a hotel without you, siren. I’m sad about that.”
I lean my head back to rest next to his, letting him kiss my temple. “Me, too.”
My pout is obvious. I’d rather have him going home with me for two days straight.
“Come with me.”
I turn my head to stare at him. He doesn’t mean that, does he? The wary, hopeful look on his face says he does.
It’s tempting. So tempting. I’ve never been to LA, and I’ve heard good things. Not to mention, I’d be all over him every chance I get. All alone in a hotel room with this man spells nothing but trouble of the happy variety.
Something is holding me back. I end up groaning in frustration.
“I’m supposed to meet my little brother tomorrow. I think he’s finally introducing me to his group. He’s been really nervous about it. They’re poly, and I want them welcomed in a big way. I don’t want them doubting that I’ll support them til my last breath.” I sound more disgruntled than happy about it for once.
Poe tucks a finger under my chin to regain my full attention. He looks disappointed. I wait for him to argue.
“I won’t get in the way,” he assures me. His smile is a little lopsided, like he’s putting on the brave face this time.
My eyes widen in surprise. “You’ll never be in the way, cher . I’d rather you be with me for it. I want you to meet him, too. I want you to be welcomed in a big way.”
The words are spur-of-the-moment but honest. I’d love for Ash to see Poe and know he’s it for me. The rest of the family may doubt it, but Ash won’t.
“I’d rather be here for it, too,” he says with a sudden grin. “Maybe I can reschedule.”
My mouth drops open in disbelief. “Really? You’d do that?”
Poe pulls out his phone and makes a call, walking outside to start arguing in a jaw-clenched way that makes me giddy.
Damon comes up next to me and slaps my arm.
“What?” I protest with wide eyes.
“When a man that obsessed with you says he’s leaving and he looks like his dog just died over it, you don’t shrug and say, oh well.”
“I don’t want him to think I’m crazy,” I hiss back. “That’s what broke William and me up.”
“He is definitely not William. I saw him yesterday, if I needed a refresher,” Damon frowns thoughtfully. His friendship got a little rocky after our breakup. I feel bad about it. “He’s a moron, but he does good tattoo work.”
That’s a sad truth. His art is what drew my attention. He didn’t have much else to offer that was good.
“Did you miss the part where I said he’s obsessed with you ? You basically shit glitter to him. Show him the love, Adds. Don’t hold back.”
I cringe over the visual he just forced on me. I’ll never look at happy glitter the same way again.
Poe comes in looking more upset than before.
“They won’t. The company has been waiting for this model to be available, and it’s his only opening. They said if I bail out, that’s it for me with that company. There are a lot of SoT members there who will leave if they fire me. I’m so damn sorry, siren.”
I bounce out of my chair and jog over to wrap my arms around him.
“It means more to me that you tried than anything, cher . Thank you. Don’t push too hard because I’m pouting. That’s no way to make money. I’m crazy for you, but I like you well-fed too.”
“I’ve got your back, Poe,” Damon says from behind me. “I’ll get her into girlfriend shape in no time. She’s giving you an example of my tutoring.”
“Like you’d know what that is,” I snap back as Poe’s arms go around me.
“Better than you,” Damon smirks.
“At least I’m leaving you with a life coach,” Poe says dryly.
I slap his thigh without much force. I’m snuggled in his arms for a few minutes before an idea comes to me.
“Take Racer,” I lean back with a grin. “That way, I’ll be with you even when I’m not.”
His expression eases from grumpy defeat to a subtle smile. “That’s an idea. Maybe I should take it with me everywhere.”
“Since you’ve taken it hostage, you have a responsibility,” I assure him with a grim nod. “You can’t leave it at home alone. Who knows how many walls it’s chewed through by now?”
Poe finally grins at me, his arms tightening.
I make a quick list of demands. Things he can do without me that will make him happy. “I expect some sightseeing. Maybe a zoo. I’ll need proof, too. Send me some pictures so I don’t pout too much.”
“I can do that,” he gives me a gentle kiss that becomes heated quickly.
Damon has to break us apart by loudly coughing right next to us.
I ignore him to grin at Poe’s flushed face. The glare he’s giving Damon should hit him like lightning.
“We’ll be ok, cher .”
His smile falters, and he glances away. “Can I take you to lunch? I want to talk to you for a minute.”
I’d be afraid of that sentence if he weren’t clutching the back of my shirt as if he were trying to keep me from running.
I glance at Damon, who nods, shooing us away.
I take him to the diner where Ash and I always meet. Poe stays quiet and thoughtful until our drinks are served. His silence is broken by a single, muttered sentence.
“I’m messed up.”
I take a big swallow of soda before I respond. “Me too. Show me yours, and I’ll show you mine.”
His eyes trap me, freezing me in place. The dread there startles me. It makes my hand move to take his on the table. Before I can ask what’s wrong, he starts talking.
“I have a problem with leaving you for so long. I know it’s fucked up, but I’m terrified you’ll use my absence as a reason to walk away.”
Holy shit. He’s just as crazy as I am.
But this level of intensity after one day together is a little concerning. If he has this many doubts from the start, is that a bad sign? Or is he honestly showing me that he doesn’t think he can do without me for so long?
It’s a lot to consider over one lunch.
“Which is why I’m about to scare you even more,” he sighs as if he’s resigned to this turning bad.
“I’m already freaky. I can handle it,” I try to tease him while my mind works over what might be under the surface of him.
He doesn’t smile. He looks grim, closing himself away from me.
“Will you download an app so I can see where you are?”
My head tilts, confusion taking over.
He’s scared I’m going to run while he’s gone. This is new for both of us, and if he feels anything like I do, him leaving is going to suck. I already miss him, and he hasn’t left yet.
That tempers a little of the wariness. I’m the same way. I just never would have thought about keeping tabs on him so openly. While I’m thinking, he’s still talking.
“I don’t think you’re going to cheat. I know that’s where you are with this,” he quickly explains. “I want to be able to look down and see you’re still there, even if you’re not in front of me. That I didn’t imagine you. I do better with visual confirmation than anything else. I can make up what you’re doing in my head when things get rough.”
My frown gets a little deeper. I’m not sure if I should fight this or not. I’m not a psychologist. Would it be better to give in? I don’t mind it. But should I? I raccoon-roll to test this out.
“You know where I’m at, Poe. Home, the shop, maybe the diner. That’s about it.”
“Places I can imagine without you in them,” he mutters with a genuinely tired sigh. He looks exhausted with himself. “My imagination is my worst enemy. I want a concrete solution that I won’t doubt. The dot means you’re there. I see it. I don’t want to drive you away by texting all the time. I already know I will. At least this way, I can pretend to be quiet about it.”
The junkyard dog is displaying his manners before he bites and locks down, never letting go. Asking instead of being sneaky about it.
“Now, now,” I protest with a raised brow. “I like to feel some affectionate attention. I don’t care if you overdo it. I tend to go overboard, too. I wouldn’t have a problem with telling you if you’re driving me crazy.”
“When you’re busy?” He raises a skeptical brow. “Will you take the gloves off to answer before I start spamming you?”
“ Mais , no,” I scoff. “I’m as bad as you when I get focused.”
“Do you know how comforting it would be for me to look you up and see you’re at the shop? You aren’t ignoring me when I can see that you’re busy.”
My eyes narrow on him thoughtfully. Which way do I roll now?
“I know it’s insane. No one has to tell me that.”
My mind has gone in other directions. Something more positive than the negative way he’s presenting it.
“Are you talking about one that has alerts on it if there’s trouble, like SOS, or one that lets you know if there’s been an accident? That kind of thing?” That sounds better. It makes the I’m crazy talk take a backseat.
Keeping tabs to make sure I’m ok isn’t insane. People do it all the time. As a matter of fact, I should put Ash on one, so I know when he’s going to show up. I might have fewer heart attacks.
There’s also the fact that Poe is going to be who knows where, who knows when, and who knows how long. Maybe I need to see a little dot, too. Who knew a blip on a screen could put my mind at ease?
“Yes,” his brows furrow. “Why?”
“Show me,” I say, squeezing his hand and moving to sit next to him in his booth.
He looks surprised when I pull out my phone and start searching for apps that meet both our needs. The one he pulls up is too basic.
“Just like that?” His voice is soft as he watches my fingers move.
“You’re the one going out of state,” I remind him with a stern look. “Maybe I want to know what fancy restaurant you’re at. Or if you get kidnapped by some model and move to Vegas. I want to know where to send the hate mail. You won’t get away unscathed, yappy dog.”
“That’s never happening,” his lips turn up into a subtle smile.
I give him a raised eyebrow look and download an app that looks right for us. I try to sign up to pay for the extra services, but he takes that option away with a glare. It was his idea, so I don’t pay.
I make it a game, tagging locations and naming them ridiculous things. My shop is now the raccoon hideout , and my apartment is the raccoon den . He adds his address with a subtle but pointed look. He titles it I’m waiting . I rename it hostage location in retaliation. He never should have made me an admin.
I make my image a raccoon and try to convince Poe to make his a dumpster. Instead, he chooses a cane corso. A big, fierce-bodied black dog that should have a mean face, but it’s all smiles with a lolling tongue. It makes me laugh to picture such an aggressive-looking animal being a lap dog.
By the time he has to leave to pack, he’s a lot more comfortable.
“You be safe,” I insist while we stand in front of the shop. “Text me whenever you feel like it. Let me know you got there safe, so I don’t scare myself. Name the hotel the depression station.”
Poe’s gentle smile becomes a happy grin at my list of demands.
“I will.” Two words cover everything I’ve told him to do.
“You better,” I mutter and give him another kiss.
He turns away from me, his grin giddy. I stand there, watching him walk away. He looks back twice, which makes my heart flutter. I blow him a kiss when he drives by. As soon as he’s around the corner, I open the app and send him a poke. I hope it vibrates his butt.
His request may have started off concerning, but we turned it around. It doesn’t have to be scary if you don’t want it to be. Instead of stalking each other, we put a pretty bow on it and call it concern for one another. Who cares who judges it?
I hope that mindset continues throughout my life.