The Confidant

Chapter Eleven

Adelaide

I look around my bedroom with narrowed eyes. Something is missing, and I want to know which one Poe stole.

He’s been doing this for a week. Asking me when I’ll move in with him and stealing a raccoon every time I say not yet. He’s convinced that if he has enough hostages, I’ll have to stage a rescue attempt.

My eyes fall on the empty space on the dresser and widen.

“Two this time? That yappy dog is getting bold.” The fierce words are followed by a helpless laugh of happiness.

He spends every night here anyway. I don’t see the need to rush.

I’m lying. I’m ready to move in with him and stick to him like glue. It just seems like it’s too soon. Not for us, but for the people who know us.

Damon’s eyes got huge when Poe brought it up at the shop. He and Grace are slow-moving, even though he’s dead set on keeping her for the long haul. It’s freaking Damon out that I’ve gone all-in within weeks, and Poe is following along with a smug grin.

I think Damon and Grace created an intervention for us. Damon caught me at work with his cautioning lecture. He took all day to have a sit-down chat with me. Grace keeps catching Poe in their weekly group meetings.

When Poe told me about it, I was horrified on his behalf. He thinks it’s funny because she got the guts to call him out in public. Grace doesn’t talk much during their group time, and she went all out, hogging the whole hour talking to him. Everyone else in the group was split fifty-fifty on what he should do.

The SoT groups are supposed to meet up once a week to catch up and check in with each other. They can choose not to come, but that means a phone call or an email from at least one of the group members. Nobody gets left behind if Poe has anything to say about it, regardless of whether he is personally in the group or not.

Now they all know about me, and the random welcome-to-the-family texts I’ve gotten make my heart swell. No lectures, just open arms and acceptance.

Poe is the one getting the lectures. He’s smug every time he recounts an argument. Proving that he doesn’t care about all the negatives they point out because the positives outweigh them every single time.

I know that Poe is using his relentless focus on me in any way that he can. In every way that I need.

I thought I was pushy. Then I met Poe.

“This whole thing is getting out of hand,” I sigh now with a ton of disappointment.

When does walking the line with friends become too much? It feels way too early to start arguing with them. They’re only looking out for us. Nobody wants us to make a decision we might regret.

I’m debating on it when my phone rings.

It’s Maman.

My good mood drops flat, but if I don’t answer, it will be a whole thing that I don’t want to deal with. Any time I ignore or miss her calls, she gets my sisters involved. It’s a nightmare of phone ringing that doesn’t stop until I talk to Maman.

“Hi, Maman,” I answer hesitantly. I’m trying to sound chipper, but with the way the last phone call went, it’s a struggle. I have a mirror right across from me to remind me of why, if I’m brave enough to look up.

“Adelaide.”

Uh oh. The dark tone of quiet rage makes my shoulders stiffen. What have I done now? How is it possible for me to make people mad when I’m not even in the same state as them? At least she still knows my name, though I wish she didn’t at this point.

“Yes?” My voice gets even more cautious.

“Thank you so much for assisting with the move. Daniella was so excited to see you.” The tone of false, mocking sweetness makes me frown.

“Huh?” I ask in confusion. “What move?”

Maman takes a deep breath on the phone to try to calm herself down.

“Who moved, Maman?”

“You’re going to pretend you don’t know.” She lets out a bitter laugh.

“No pretending here,” I protest with a frown. “I’ve got no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Daniella’s move,” she tells me in a gentle voice. The rage is simmering underneath, making the tone a lie. “Her boyfriend, who she thought was her One, took all her money and left her up north to rot. We packed her up and moved her home.”

“ What? ” I sit down at the shock of it. “I didn’t even know she had a boyfriend! Is she ok?”

“She’s home. Of course, she’s ok.”

Only Maman would believe that being in her sphere of influence would magically cure everything. Every problem is always, move home, and I’ll fix it. Mental anguish doesn’t work that way.

“Daniella called you for help. You were supposed to meet us there. Why did you not show up, Adelaide? Your sister needed you, and you couldn’t be bothered to even call her?”

“I had no idea any of this was happening!” I yell back, my temper blowing up for the first time at my mother. Yes, she makes me angry. But not enough to yell. My frustration with all the unfair judgments has boiled over. “Why am I getting a call after it’s all said and done if you’re so pissed? You’re usually on my ass after ten seconds of waiting for me. Why don’t I know this asshole’s name or that he exists?”

“Don’t you take that tone with me,” she hisses back. “And don’t shift the blame on other people. Own up to your mistakes for once.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I let out a ragged puff of air. “You want me to take a picture of my phone history? I haven’t heard anything about this until now.”

“I don’t need your empty assurances. It’s probably better you didn’t come.”

I feel like she slapped me in the face. The pain and anger mix together until my jaw aches from how hard I have my teeth clenched.

“Maybe I should be glad I didn’t get told until now, then,” I spit out like a juvenile.

“Maybe you should. Goodbye , Adelaide.”

She hangs up after her bitter farewell, leaving me floundering. I shouldn’t have said that. Lowering myself to her level won’t yield results. I’ve never yelled at her before. Instead of shaking her up, the end result was even more stubborn denials of my innocence.

No way am I letting this one go. I can’t. This has all gone way too far.

I call the source to ask my anger-filled questions and demand explanations.

Daniella.

She picks up on the fourth ring, sounding exasperated and speaking in a hushed tone.

“ What ?”

As an opening, this isn’t what I was expecting. The hostility in her tone is a little much when I’m the one who should be mad.

“What do you mean, what ? You didn’t call me to help?”

“Hang on, Maman,” Dani calls out, and there’s a shuffling sound before a door closes, and her voice goes to a normal volume.

“No, I didn’t,” she admits with a gritty tone.

My mouth drops open, and all my air vanishes like I just got a punch to the stomach.

“But Maman thinks you did,” I barely manage to get out.

“And no one will ever know any different, you get me?” she assures me firmly. “I didn’t want you making a mess of everything.”

What the hell?

“What are you talking about?” I choke out in disbelief.

“All you do is create drama and act like a fool. I don’t need the asshole’s legs broken or any other nonsense. I wanted to get out of there with some dignity and lick my wounds. I know you wouldn’t have let it go even if I asked you to. You can’t blame me for not wanting to deal with you on top of everything else.”

I’m speechless. I know Dani and I aren’t best buddies, but damn. She’s right that my first thought would be to track him down and beat the crap out of him. Asher would be down. Some of Suzette’s guys, too, I’m betting.

They were all welcomed, so why wasn’t I? And why lie about it? She has to know that it would cause me nonstop trouble with Maman.

“I would have respected your wishes, Dani,” I mutter helplessly. “Why did you lie about calling me?”

“It got Maman off my back like it always does. As long as you’re in her sights, she leaves the rest of us alone. How do you not know this by now? You’re always her go-to when anger hits. I just made sure it stayed on you so I could actually get through this without a lecture. Even Asher came. With all his troupe in tow. Have you met them yet? Oh, no, you haven’t. One of the add-ons told me that.”

The phone slides away from my ear in disbelief at the twist of smug glee in her voice.

Dani has never gotten along with me. It got worse after we left Dad behind. She cozied up to Maman and became her right-hand woman in any situation. We butt heads just as much as I do with Maman. I didn’t realize it was this bad, though.

Bad enough to make fun of the fact that I live in the same town as Asher and still haven’t met his cake. I set that pain aside to focus on the rest of this eye-opening lesson.

She’s been riling Maman up to focus on me? Just to keep herself from getting the same hate I have to deal with nonstop. And now she’s extending that to keeping me as far away as possible to make sure my so-called drama doesn’t touch her?

Do Suzette and Sophia do it, too?

I bring the phone to my ear to ask, but she hung up.

I try calling Sophia next and get a busy message. Same with Suzette. I try Dani again, but it’s the same message. Are they talking to each other now? Getting their story straight? How long have they been doing this to me? It’s like they don’t care that Maman has ripped me to so many shreds that I had to leave town to get away from it.

Maybe they don’t.

Is Asher a part of this?

I call him just in case. I need someone to hear me out. If anyone would, it’s him. His phone rings and rings without an answer, but it lets me leave a message. I text him, too, just in case. He’ll get back to me, I know it. I just have to be patient.

I look up the service area for my hometown and find no problems with the phone service for that area. I’m an idiot. Of course, there aren’t any problems. Maman just called me from there, and I called Daniella. So, why is everything so busy now? Out of sheer desperation, I try Joe and encounter the same problem. I know he’s not in on some gossip session.

When I look up what the problem could be, my stomach drops.

Did they block my number? What the hell!?

What is going on with my family?

First, Maman targets me. I’ve known that she does it for a long time. I’ve never had it thrown in my face to stare at by someone else before. Everybody knows she does it. No one says a word. They use it to their advantage. How much extra hate do I get because of it?

Then, I find out my sisters believe all this Broussard nonsense and refuse to hear me out for their own selfish reasons. I can’t picture Asher doing that, but who knows anymore?

I feel like someone ripped off my blinders about my family and is forcing me to see them for what they are. The agony of it is almost crippling.

Has this all been going on behind my back my whole life?

I can’t even vent to Damon because he’s applying to other shops for a table today. His money has gotten tighter now that he’s with Grace. A natural result of wanting to spoil the person you’re with. There’s nothing wrong with him moving forward with more job security. He’s stressed out enough. I can’t add my problems on top of that. He’ll want to take care of it himself.

I don’t open the shop. I don’t think I can function well enough to do the job I love.

Asher texts me back that night. After I’ve had a day of no contact, no matter how many different numbers I try. Even Maman’s line sends me to voicemail as soon as it connects now.

Asher: Dani’s boyfriend left her. We moved her out.

Me: You knew? They called you and not me? You took everyone with you to meet them and I don’t even know half their names.

There’s a long pause with the bubbles popping up and going away several times.

Asher: Dani said she called you.

Me: She didn’t!

I say it out loud angrily as I type it.

Asher: Ok

Me: What the hell does that mean?

Asher: It means ok

I stare at the line with my jaw dropped.

Me: You don’t believe me do you

I wait several minutes, but he doesn’t reply again.

I want to chuck the phone into the garbage disposal. It takes me a bit to calm down enough to try again. They’re shutting me out. How is that possible with so many siblings? None of them thought to contact me. To check in and see if I was running late or if I’d been in an accident.

Panic rises again. Do they not care that much?

My world is changing. Crumbling. Please don’t let Asher be the same.

Me: I’m serious! Nobody contacted me until Maman did this morning.

Asher: It’s fine. Stop being dumb. I believe you. And stop flooding my phone. I’m dealing with something else.

My shoulders slump. I got the same old brotherly ‘love’ I’d expect from him. Comfort in the form of an insult. It soothes a little of the panic. He’s busy now, but that doesn’t mean he won’t listen when his issue is over.

By the time Poe comes over, I’m beside myself with pity and sorrow. The anger has been replaced with a numb kind of confusion.

“Siren?”

My eyes are drawn to him as I chew my thumbnail. He looks just as good as he did the first day I saw him. When our eyes connect, that little zing runs through me. Even that doesn’t feel like enough of an anchor to keep him. Everyone else has turned on me. Why wouldn’t he?

“Your texts have been kind of off all day,” he watches me warily, Racer clasped under his arm as usual.

“My oldest sister got dumped by way of losing all her money. I didn’t even know she had a boyfriend, much less that she thought she had found her One. Maman called this morning to chew me out for not showing up to help her move back home. Dani told her she called me, but she didn’t . She admitted it when I called her and acted smug as hell that Asher introduced everyone but me to his group. Seems she’s been turning Maman against me so she can avoid a lecture, too. I got no idea how long that’s been going on. Or if my other sisters do it too.”

His brows lower as he pulls out a chair to set Racer on. It would have made me laugh earlier. Now, it’s barely noted.

It hits me that he has no idea who I’m talking about. I’ve never explained all my siblings or given him their names. I’m as bad as Ash.

“You wouldn’t do that.”

His instant support brings tears to my eyes, sidetracking any belated introduction I had planned. Tears start flowing at his easy acceptance of me as me . I was starting to wonder if anyone did anymore.

“At least someone knows that,” I sniffle and start pacing again. “Now I think they all have me blocked. Ash is no help because he never wants to talk, but at least he’s answering. Four damn siblings, and not one wants to explain it to me.”

“May I see your phone? I need a bit more context, and I don’t want to upset you with more questions,” He approaches me to stand in the way of my pacing. I open the phone with face ID and slap it in his palm with a bravery I didn’t know I had in me.

I can trust this man with my secrets. I don’t doubt it anymore.

He takes his time looking through. I’m sure he’s being as thorough as he usually is. I try to be patient about it as I watch, but it’s hard.

Our sibling bond was supposed to be forged in fire. I thought it was unbeatable. I’m slowly starting to realize that I’ve been a piece they’ve been trying to chip off so subtly that I didn’t even notice.

Everything has been eroding faster ever since I moved here. The more I entrench myself in my own life, the more wrong I am. Like Suzette’s request that I stop sending out invites to tattoo expos that I’ll be at if they want to visit me. None of them have ever come, but I’ve held out hope that one day they would. It’s been years since I’ve seen any of my sisters face to face.

Not once have they come to visit. Not me, and not Ash. It used to be phone calls during the holidays or when someone had good gossip to share. That slowed to a stop as the years moved on. No one has called me for anything good since Ash got together with Tera. Even before that, I barely got a text. Obviously, for long enough that the sisters have made a separate chat. I bet Daniella told them all about her boyfriend.

If all of them are pushing me away, doesn’t that mean I’m the problem? But what did I do? Exist? Look like an evil man? Doesn’t everything I’ve done to make up for that mean anything to them?

“You keep everything, don’t you?” Poe mutters as he slowly scrolls back farther and farther.

“I forget to clean it out,” I shake my head. “My battery is a champ.”

“It is,” he agrees solemnly. “A few years ago, the job of informing people about plans and issues fell to Daniella as the oldest. Do you remember that?”

I blink at him in a stupor.

“No? It was a vote, I think. Why? What’s that got to do with anything?”

“Everything after that is random, bland check-ins. Even those stopped about seven months ago,” he tells me, his focus on the phone instead of my baffled face. “I can see the difference in the texts. The tones they’re using. Everything is full of open conversation, and then it gradually becomes limited replies. There aren’t any invitations made by anyone but you directly after the vote in any of your messages.”

“You mean Daniella is really cutting me out?” I’m heartbroken, though I knew deep inside that it was coming. She admitted it earlier today as if it’s old news.

I just hoped it was a one-off. That she was talking out of anger at her ex instead of me. Anything that I could use to make her behavior alright to me would have worked. Now Poe is giving me straight facts that hammer the truth home to stay.

“That’s what it looks like to me,” his voice goes solemn.

“I can’t call Maman and accuse one of her babies of doing that. She’d never believe me,” I mutter with a shake of my head. It would only cause more problems. Daniella is the backbone that keeps people in line. She picked up that role as soon as things fell apart in the family.

“Maman. That’s your mother?” He glances at me with narrowed eyes.

“Yeah,” I answer warily.

“Does she always talk to you like this?”

I take the phone from him when he offers it to me. He has our minimal chats scrolled up to months ago.

Maman: Don’t you dare interfere with Asher’s One. I heard you’ve been pestering him to meet her. Don’t ruin this with your clinging.

I blink, reading it out of context for the first time. She sounds downright hateful. I know she’s that way because of her overprotective stance on Ash. Poe doesn’t.

“She’s really protective of him,” I look up at Poe’s slow-building scowl. “She’s that way with all of us.”

Why do I feel like I’m lying?

“And you still haven’t met her?” He pushes gently.

“Maman has some stupid idea that I’m jealous,” I roll my eyes. “Ash knows better. He’s just busy having fun for once.”

He doesn’t have a response to that, which makes me more nervous. It’s getting harder to defend them when he doesn’t give me anything to argue with.

“What does she mean? His one?” His brows furrow.

“You’re gonna laugh, and I need you to hold that in.” I give him a fierce stare. “My family believes in a soulmate. Instant connection. Forever love. All of that. We call it the One. We really shouldn’t, now that I think about it. Suzette has three soulmates.”

His brow goes up in surprise, but he brushes that off without comment. “You would be the first person to throw a party at something like that.”

“I may have thrown confetti in his face the day after he told me about her,” I try not to smile at the memory of Ash’s deadpan expression covered in yellow ducky confetti. “He said I made him deaf when I screamed in his ear about the frosting and sprinkles she comes with. The other men in their poly group. Perfect balance for little bro.”

“ That I can see. Not jealousy.”

How does he see me so clearly while everyone else doesn’t? It seems wrong somehow.

“Yeah. He tells me about stuff that he doesn’t want to get back to Maman. She suffocates him with her hovering. I’m not too surprised I haven’t met his One yet. He’s overprotective.”

His brows start furrowing again.

“Why does your mother say you’re forcing your way in?”

I glance down at the messages. Where did he read that? I scroll up a little more and find it.

Maman: Suzette is perfectly fine with her three men. Stop trying to force your way into her group. They have four people already. They don’t need five.

I swallow hard. “They think I’m too pushy. I’ve realized it’s true. I’m still dying my hair blond to fit in, and everyone knows it. I act like a fool.”

“What’s the real color?” He eyes my dark roots as if the answer isn’t obvious.

“Brown,” I roll my eyes. “Plain old brown.”

“I’d like to see it.”

I give him a dirty look. “ I wouldn’t, and that’s what matters.”

No way do I want that haunting me every time I look in a mirror.

His lips curl up into a sly grin. “That’s a perfect answer.”

“Oh, hush,” I wave him away. The lighter banter eases a little of my tension.

“Everyone else is blond?”

“Yeah,” I let out a heavy sigh. “I’m the odd duck.”

“Where did the brown hair come from?”

The teasing question drops my humor back down. “The sperm donor. Ash calls him that. It’s really fitting.”

“They think that you trying to fit in with them is pushy ?” He raises a brow in disbelief.

“Have you met me?” I deadpan back. “I go overboard.”

“And I love it,” he assures me in an absentminded, thoughtful way that leaves the words unfiltered. “Is Maman blond?”

My eyes narrow on the way he says her name. The dark mockery there doesn’t cover his horrible attempt at my accent at all. “Yeah. So is Joseph, our stepdad.”

“You’re the only one,” he mutters, his brow furrowing as his eyes fall to the phone again. “She snapped back at a simple question.”

“Huh?” I’m not following him now.

His eyes meet mine. I’m surprised at the banked rage in them. Enough to fall still and drop my hand.

“You asked her how they were doing. That’s it. And that was her response?” The anger in his voice has me rethinking my words.

“ Cher , it’s ok,” I tell him softly. “I shouldn’t have made a fuss. I’m sure Daniella has her reasons. I just don’t know it yet. This is just another tiff. It will pass.”

Even more lies. They fall out of me naturally. I’ve trained myself to let this go on so well. I’ve never even noticed until now.

“It shouldn’t pass,” he growls out fiercely

My mouth works, but no sound comes out. Did he really just say that?

“You’re blowing over it like this is something that will change over time.” He points at the phone dangling from my hand. “There’s evidence to prove you wrong right here.”

“No,” I snap, with no idea why I’m so mad at him. All he’s doing is pointing out what I’ve already noticed. There’s no reason to be taking it out on him. He’s saying my thoughts out loud, and it’s making me panic. I don’t want it to be real. It’s better if it’s just paranoia.

But it feels like this is the first audible ring of a death knell on my relationship with all of my family. All of my support and comfort are getting pulled out from underneath me. I’m independent to a fault, but not to have anyone in Louisiana willing to talk to me? That’s agonizing in its blatant finality.

A text comes in, making my heart race with a mix of dread and hope. It’s from Asher.

Asher: I’m working things out on my end. Will text when ready.

“Oh,” I whisper with wide eyes. I glance at Poe as a smile starts up. “Ash says he’s working on his issues at his place. He’ll let me know when he’s ready to talk.”

“That’s good,” Poe says cautiously. I don’t like the solemn look he’s got on.

“What?” My hands drop to my sides again. “What’s that look for?”

“Addie, I want you to be careful.”

“Why?” I scoff in disbelief. “It’s my little brother, not a firing squad.”

“Because you wear your heart on your sleeve,” he stands and wraps his arms around me. “You forgive when you should stand firm. They have no real reason to treat you this way.”

“It’s because I’m too-” He cuts me off angrily.

“It’s because they’re assholes, and you know it. Don’t feed me any more of the excuses they always give you to wash it away. Or take the blame you don’t deserve.”

That’s a bit harsh, but it feels good to hear. It validates all the angry whining I’ve internally been going through lately. I thought I’d left my issues behind when I moved. Turns out they’ve been building in the background while I’ve been oblivious.

“Maybe,” I offer with a pout. Admitting it without really saying it.

He lets out a rough sigh, but his body doesn’t relax.

“I need to tell you something. I feel like this is the right time. As horrible as it is.”

I lean back with a frown. His face is set in stone, looking emotionless. Not the laser focus. This is something different. It feels more ominous than anything he’s given me before.

“Grace brought something up in group today that I couldn’t argue against,” he admits, letting out a tense sigh. His eyes move away from mine to focus on the wall.

“That’s rare,” I twist in his arms to regain his attention. His shift to caution brings back my paranoia.

“I’m expecting you to go all in with me without knowing me.”

I stop the subtle movement, my brows furrowing.

“What does that mean?”

“You never ask about my money. You just accept that I have it. You never ask me for anything material when I’m fucking panting to hand it all over to you. Because the only thing you want is me . You haven’t looked up my history either, and I’ve been riding high on it,” he grumbles, his arms dropping away from me. He sits on the couch with careful movements. As if he thinks he might break a bone if he’s relaxed.

I don’t hesitate to sit at his side on my knees, facing him. I cup his cheek and turn him to face me. His eyes won’t meet mine.

“ Cher ,” I whisper. “You could be dead broke, and the only thing I’d say is get a job. We can fight our way through anything together. I’m right here. I’ll be right here. There are no rules to us. We talk when we’re ready. Being quiet is fine, too. I don’t want to take anything from you. I want to give, that’s all.”

“I’m ready,” he says without much oomph to it.

“To run,” I let a soft smile break free and brush my nose against his. “Don’t make me chase you, yappy dog.”

“Would you?” His eyes meet mine with an intensity I can’t deny.

“I would,” my smile falls away.

“Am I your one?”

My lashes flutter in surprise. I know he’s teasing me back, but I’m not going to keep the jokes going this time.

“You are. I knew it for sure the first time we kissed. Everything inside me reached for you, and I was afraid you wouldn’t reach back. You did, though. You grabbed my soul and made it whole. I’m not giving you up. Can you handle that?” My heart starts hammering, sweat building up along my spine. I swallow hard because my mouth has gone too dry.

His eyes widen. I’m close enough to see the way his pupils expand. Almost engulfing the burning green. It somehow makes his focus even darker.

“I’m your one.” The words are firm. I just confirmed some strange feeling inside him, and he’s accepting it without reserve. He looks so happy about it. The smile that kicks up is trembling.

“You are,” I say, and I get my real smile back, kissing him as gently as I can.

He braces his forehead against mine, panting as if he just ran here. I’m no better.

“Give me a second to celebrate,” he mutters, making me chuckle.

“You’re taking the news better than I did.”

“Because it’s everything I want.”

“You and your perfect words,” I sigh, pulling away from him.

He takes a deep breath as if he’s bracing himself and then rushes to speak.

“You hate your father.”

The sudden switch-up in the conversation makes me tense. His eyes open and meet mine.

“I hated mine, too. We’re alike in so many ways, but we had different paths to walk.”

I settle on my heels but reach for his hand like he did for me. I’m afraid I’m going to hear that his life was like Asher's. I’m already sad and pissed . It’s hard for me to hide it. Even harder for me not to ask for his father’s address and take a baseball bat to him.

“He beat my mother. Constantly. Drunk or sober. He had enough money and power that it was easy to hide. He never touched me. He wanted me to learn to be a man from him. There can’t be any weakness in a man. But a woman is another story.”

His eyes go hazy as memory takes hold of him. He’s still talking, but it’s as if he’s telling someone else’s story. He checked out to get through this. This is a kind of suffering I could never picture. A hateful man trying to raise his son to follow in his footsteps. Even the sperm donor didn’t try that.

“I loved my mother. I didn’t want her suffering because of him. Even in school, I could see that fathers don’t do that in a family. I wanted what those other kids had. A father who smiled and a mother who was happy.”

I nod, following along with dread building in my gut. It did the same thing when Asher started talking about his abuse. I’m going to hear something my mind can’t come back from, and it’s going to change me. Another secret locked up in my brain and heart, never to be told.

“I wasn’t big enough to take him head-on. I tried to defend her. But I couldn’t. Until I could .” He swallows hard, a shattered look entering his eyes that I want to stop. “One night, he beat my mother until she was unconscious over not handing him the salt fast enough. I thought she was dead. I thought he killed her and just sat back down to finish dinner while she was lying in a pool of her own blood. I snapped. I grabbed the knife from the ham and stabbed him. Over and over. Until my arm got weak. He never saw it coming. I never saw it coming. I killed him.”

A part of me breaks hearing that. Not for the evil man who tried to twist him up. For little Poe, taking justice into his own hands when he couldn’t take it anymore.

Ash always wanted that for himself. To get rid of the problem personally, without cops involved. After hearing that vengeful yearning from him and seeing it realized through Poe, I don’t know where to land.

I’ve seen suffering with Ash. I saw how hard he had to work to be a regular kid. Maman broke him out of that with her hovering. Then, he became a belligerent degenerate in the name of making money for us to live off of. Joseph was the one to get through to him with that. A beat cop who saw too much suffering and wanted to stop it as best he could. Now, Asher is the cold man he is today. Tera, Frosting, and Sprinkles have cracked him open, letting happiness peek out from his shell.

There’s more to life than pain. Sometimes, it’s hard to see and even harder to reach for. Poe is reaching out, and he’s afraid that I won’t be reaching back because he thinks what he did was unforgivable.

But I get it .

“Mom woke up and saw me standing over him. She snapped, too. When I felt her take the knife from me, all I could think was how glad I was that she was alive. And then she stabbed me. The same way I did to him. She gave me the scars. She said I was evil. I was evil. Not him. That I didn’t deserve to live. The neighbors had heard all the screaming and, for once, decided to call the cops. It’s the only reason I survived. I couldn’t even defend myself.”

His chin drops until he’s staring at my hand, clenched over his.

“I spent a long time in different facilities. I saw my mother when she testified against me. We both got sentenced. Her to a separate facility for a lot less time than I got. When I got out, I was nineteen. I didn’t want to leave there. I was safe. Happy almost. When I got back to that damn house, my mother was already there with a new man who was just the same. An abusive, controlling piece of shit. I could see what my future would be the first second I saw him.”

I swallow hard as tears fill my eyes. His detachment has turned into a familiar, determined anger that brings that focus back into his eyes.

“All the therapy. The guilt. The fucking agony. I wasn’t doing that again. Especially for a woman who wished I had died that night. I wanted out of the spiral, and only I could make it happen. Father left everything to me in his will. I’d reached the age for the handover to happen before I got released. The doctors helped me work through the paperwork and insisted I go straight to the lawyers when I got out for my own safety. But the lawyers had been sending letters to the house, so she knew. I could see that rage in her eyes. They were living off that money, and they wanted to keep it. I turned around and went to a hotel before they could even say a word. As soon as everything was finalized, I went back there with cops behind me. Mom had no idea that I’d gotten smarter, more focused. It wasn’t about getting everything. I didn’t want his fucking money. I didn’t want revenge on her. I just wanted to be safe .”

“And you made sure it happened,” I grit out, trying to hold back my rage. “You did good, cher .”

His eyes flick to me in confusion, but his words don’t stop. He can’t help it. Now that he’s opened those floodgates, he has to get it all out before he loses his nerve.

“The new guy wasn’t having that. Got himself arrested trying to go for me at the front door. I told my mother she could leave him and I’d make sure she had a safe place to stay or follow him out the door. She tried to convince me that I was nothing more than a demon sent to make her suffer. When that didn’t work, she left.”

His fingers clench, his breathing going choppy.

“Tell me why that hurt more than her trying to kill me? It makes no sense. I didn’t have any illusions about her at that point. She didn’t care about me. Abusers can convince their victims to believe everything is their fault. Brainwashing. Mother fit those shoes to a tee. Instead of blaming the man who deserved it, all her suffering was my fault. I took away everything she wanted, not him. It was all mental manipulation bullshit and she believed every word of it. I didn’t back down. I wasn’t a little kid terrified that he’d never see her again anymore. Thirty minutes of not talking, letting her rant, and she gave up, just like that. So she could keep being a victim with a clear conscience. She didn’t look back when she walked away. Not once.”

His eyes move up to meet mine. The sorrow and anger there have me reaching out to brush his cheek with my fingers. A feeble comfort for his pain that feels too small. A tiny bandage when his wounds are too big to cover.

“I want you to listen to me now,” he tells me in a grim tone of determination. “Even if you want me gone, just listen. Your Mother is conditioning you, and your siblings are helping. I can see it. I think you can, too.”

I want to deny it so badly. It seems too far out there to me. A conspiracy theory I should laugh about. But I can still hear Maman telling me I’d never have a One because I’m not Broussard enough. As clear as day, like she’s saying it right now.

There’s no reason to harbor that kind of hate for me. Not that I can see. Not now and not when I was a kid.

“You need to know that it’s ok to let that go. You aren’t whoever they say you are. You never were. There’s too much good in you for that. Everyone can see it.”

My startled gaze goes to his intense expression.

“I will back you up no matter what you choose, siren. I promise. But I can’t sit here and watch this play out without saying something. I want you to be happy. Always. Not doubting how amazing you are.”

“I,” my voice trails away as thoughts run through my head. “I need to think about this.”

“Alone?”

The tight, helpless sound of his voice makes it seem like a done deal that I want him gone.

“ Mais , no,” I frown at him. “You’re going to sit there and let me cuddle you the whole time. Find something to watch on TV if you get bored.”

“Addie,” my name is weak as I crawl into his lap and get comfortable.

“You hush now, cher . We’ve both had a wringer of a day, and we need a breather.”

He lets out a shaky breath as his arms wrap around me, tight enough to hurt. I don’t complain. I need it. Maybe he does, too.