Chapter Ten
TALLY
I t was nice to have the whole afternoon to myself, knowing I was free from my nanny duties for the rest of the day because the girls’ grandparents were picking them up. I made a cup of tea and sat by the window in my guest house, reading a book for a while. The sky was darker than the usual dreary Michigan winter weather, and about the time my stomach started growling for dinner, I noticed raindrops against the windowpanes. I thought about Jake having to drive home in the rain and snow and how much he would probably appreciate having a home-cooked meal after that. So rather than dinner for one, I headed inside to whip something up for the both of us that would also leave some leftovers for him.
I whipped up a lasagna and started it baking, then stuck a frozen garlic bread in when the lasagna was close to done. The house smelled so good. My stomach growled even louder than before.
I grabbed a plate from the cupboard and dished myself a serving … or two, and sat down at the kitchen island to enjoy my dinner.
Loud tapping against the kitchen windows stole my attention, and I looked outside and noticed the bushes were coated with ice. I got up and opened the back door, and a frigid breeze blew against me, causing a shiver. Freezing rain fell hard and covered the back steps and railing in a sheet of ice. I touched my foot to the top step, and my shoe slipped along the slick surface. And that was when I began to worry. About my family and friends who might be driving somewhere. And about Jake, who I knew was out on the roads.
I returned to the table to finish my meal so I could head back to the guest house before I needed ice skates to make the journey. Halfway through my lasagna, the lights flickered, and I got a sinking feeling in my stomach. Moments later, they went out completely.
I called my mom to see if they had power. She said she heard most of the town was without.
I texted the Solo Sisters group chat to make sure my girls were all home and safe. They were. Ellie said Nashville was even getting some of the snow from the same storm system moving through.
I turned on my cell phone flashlight and put the lasagna into the refrigerator. Who knew how long the power would be out, and I didn’t want it to go bad.
I abandoned my dinner and went in search of flashlights or candles. I had no idea what was in the house or where they would be. I started with the kitchen cupboards and drawers. No flashlights, but I did find a box of matches and a bag of tea-light candles. Better than nothing. I lit a handful on the kitchen counter and living room coffee table, then wandered through the house, opening and closing every door and drawer I came across, but found nothing else helpful.
As I walked through the living room, I stopped in my tracks. The ambiance in the room suddenly felt very romantic. I didn’t purposely fill the room with candles to set the mood for seduction or something. But would Jake think I had?
I groaned. This was all Penny’s fault … putting those thoughts in my head earlier. He was definitely not into me. And I was sure he’d walk in and see this as nothing more than my attempt to light the dark house.
He’s your boss. He’s not allowed to like you. It’s … forbidden.
“Shut up, Penny,” I snapped.
As I headed to the kitchen again, I glanced over at the fireplace. If the power stayed out, this old house would get very cold. The guest house only had a small electric furnace, so the fireplace would be my best bet to stay warm.
I stood there staring at it for several minutes. We didn’t grow up with a fireplace, so I had no idea if there was anything special I needed to know before lighting a fire in there.
There were logs on a rack to the side, so I grabbed a few of those and put them in the fireplace box. I grabbed the matches I’d found and attempted to start the fire. I lit one and held it next to the log, but it burnt out within seconds. I tried another with the same result.
“Seriously?” I groaned. “I’ve changed a tire on my car, replaced a light fixture in my bedroom, and figured out how to work a Diaper Genie. I can light a log on fire. ”
I thought about all the bonfires Ellie’s brother Ethan had started for us over the years. Maybe I needed some crumpled-up newspaper. I couldn’t find any of that, but I did find some blank sheets of the girls’ drawing paper. I crumpled those up, shoved them between the logs, and lit them. The paper burned up quickly, but the logs didn’t catch.
Frustrated, I went looking for other options. In a little cupboard to the right of the fireplace was a box containing some kind of fire starter sticks. I read the directions and lit one of those, and sure enough, one of the logs began to burn.
“Yes!” I was so happy the flames were dancing that I did a little celebration dance of my own, spinning, swaying, shaking my hips.
“Natalia?”
I whipped around to see Jake standing in the doorway between the kitchen and living room, shining a flashlight my way.
My face heated, and I was utterly mortified. I thought I saw a look of amusement cross his face, but it was kind of dark in there, so I couldn’t be sure.
“Natalia!” Jake’s expression changed as he pointed the light at the fireplace and darted across the room.
I turned in time to see Jake fanning his arms at dark smoke coming into the room from the fireplace.
My hands shot up and covered my mouth in horror. What did I do?
Jake opened the cupboard beside the fireplace, put on a pair of long gloves, and got down by the fire. Coughing, he reached up under, then there was a loud clunking of metal, and the smoke began to dissipate.
“Phew!” He sat back on his heels as he took off the gloves and tossed them to the side of the hearth, then looked back at me. “That was close. Were you trying to burn down my house?”
Tears burned my eyes more than the smoke had. “I’m so sorry,” I whispered. “I was trying to warm it up in here. I didn’t know …” I couldn’t even look him in the eye.
He got up, walked over, and took hold of my arms, tilting his head until I looked at him. “Are you okay?”
I nodded as I swiped away a tear.
“I should’ve showed you how to open the damper and explained how it worked. I just didn’t expect you to use the fireplace.” His gaze moved over my face until they met mine again, and my stomach fluttered at the intense look in his eyes.
I swallowed hard and fought the urge to reach up and wipe the smear of soot from his cheek. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah.”
The light of the fire reflected in his eyes, and I looked down and noticed the sleeve of his pale blue dress shirt covered in soot. “Oh, no.”
He let go of my arms and examined the damage with a shrug. “I need some new shirts anyway.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“No more apologies, Natalia. I’m starving. Did I see a plate of half-eaten lasagna on the kitchen counter?”
I had forgotten all about that. I followed him to the kitchen, still a little shaken over the smoke in the living room and the smoke show before me.
He went to the fridge and took out the lasagna.
“It’ll have to be cold. I put it away a while ago.”
“Cold lasagna is better than no lasagna.”
We bumped into each other in the dark as he moved to get a plate, and I giggled nervously.
He dished himself a large helping, and then we moved into the living room to stay warm.
“Where do you keep your flashlights?” I asked as I followed him.
“In the garage. There’s a cupboard just outside the mudroom door.”
“Ah. I didn’t think to look there. Do you have any regular candles?” I pointed at the tea lights. “These aren’t going to last very long.”
He plopped down on the couch with his loaded plate. “I think Kate had some around here somewhere. I’ll have to check in a bit.”
I took a seat on the floor next to the fire.
“Thanks for this.” He spoke through a bite and held up another forkful. “When the girls aren’t here, you don’t have to cook for me, though.”
“I was making it for myself anyway, and I thought how much I would appreciate it if someone made me dinner after driving on bad roads like that.”
His smile reached his eyes. “That’s very thoughtful of you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Jake set his plate on the coffee table, got up, left the room for a few minutes, and returned with some pillar candles and a pile of fleece-lined blankets. He walked over and wrapped a blanket around my shoulders, then tossed another over my lap. After grabbing his plate, he moved to sit on the floor beside me, wrapped in blankets of his own .
He took another bite of lasagna, and his eyelids drifted shut as he let out a contented moan. His reaction warmed me through and through.
I stared into the flames, trying not the think about how I was sitting in front of a fire with Jake Mills, alone in the middle of an ice storm. Ellie would’ve had a field day with this one if she knew.
“Lasagna and that big breakfast this morning and the mac and cheese last night. I’ll go up a pants size if you keep making food this good.”
I chuckled.
We sat in silence for a few minutes while he ate, and the quiet between us made me feel fidgety.
“Were the roads really bad?” I asked.
“Awful. There were cars in the ditch everywhere. I almost slid off the road about ten times myself.”
My eyes widened. “Oh my gosh. Really?”
“Yeah. It’s not pretty out there.”
We were silent for another minute or two. I didn’t believe what the girls said about him being weird because he was into me, but he still wasn’t making conversation, and I needed the awkward silence to go away.
“So, I never asked what you do for a living?” I motioned at his clothing. “Obviously, an office job.”
“Maybe I dress this way for my job as a garbage collector.”
I laughed, and he shot me a grin that had me all twitterpated.
“I work for a finance company in risk management.”
“Hmm. What does that mean exactly?”
“I basically analyze data to determine the risk to the company on things like trading stocks and commodities. ”
“That sounds tedious.”
He shrugged. “I enjoy it, actually. I’ve always been a numbers guy, and I get to play a role in the stability and growth of the company.”
“It’s good you like your job.”
“And do you like your job?” He grinned, and my stomach flipped. It really needed to stop doing that.
“You know I do.”
We were quiet again, and I stared into the fire.
“Can I ask you a personal question?” he asked through another bite of lasagna.
“I guess so.” Those were my least favorite kinds of questions to answer.
“The other day, you said you don’t date.”
I pressed my lips together and nodded.
“I find that very hard to believe.”
I eyed him. “That’s not a question.”
He smirked. “You say you can’t talk to guys. Is that really the reason?”
“I’m shy.”
“A lot of people are shy.”
“No, I’m extremely shy. Like, I get a panic attack if I have to speak to someone I’ve never met. I mean, I spent hours before I even called you, going over the conversation in my mind, working myself up just to dial your number, and that was just on the phone to set up a job interview.”
“Really?”
“I don’t like being put on the spot. I don’t like small talk. I freeze up. It’s not as simple as just being shy for me.”
“Wow.” He cocked his head to one side. “But you’re talking to me fine right now. ”
“It’s usually when I first meet someone or around a group of strangers. Once I meet someone and get to know them a little, I feel more comfortable, and I’m able to speak more freely.”
“But no dating? Ever? Nobody’s ever asked you out?”
“The past decade of my life has been about caring for people’s kids. I don’t have much of a social life outside of my small group of friends. And when I’m around town, I usually have a kid or two with me, and guys aren’t usually interested in me when they think I have kids.”
He nodded as if he understood.
My self-consciousness flared. “I can’t believe I just told you all that.”
“I’m glad you told me.” He put his empty plate on the coffee table and scooted a little closer to the fire, which happened to be closer to me, and tucked a blanket over his lap.
“Is it my turn to ask you a personal question?” I summoned all my bravery to get those words out.
“I mean, it’s only fair,” he said with a grin. How was each grin more handsome than the last? Ugh.
“Do you mind me asking what happened with your wife?” I asked hesitantly.
“Ah. I knew this question would come up eventually.”
“I think it would help me with the girls if I understood the situation a little more.”
“I get that. Kate was unhappy with my job situation. She didn’t like my long hours. She said she felt trapped here, like she had no life outside of taking care of the girls. When they started school, she insisted we put Piper in daycare a few days a week so that she could have some time to herself. I thought that sounded okay. I wanted her to be happy.” He frowned. “I guess I should’ve seen the signs.”
She started hanging out with this girl she met at a yoga class. She would drop the girls at her parents’ more and more often and go out to bars with her. And that’s where she eventually met Darryl. At a bar.”
I stayed quiet, listening to whatever he wanted to share with me.
“She’d fallen out of love with me years before, but she thought she could make it work. That’s when we had Piper. I guess she thought having another kid was the answer. Until she met the true love of her life.” He rolled his eyes when he said it. “She finally told me how she felt instead of telling me years ago when it could’ve made a difference. She left last year and moved to Montana with him. Our divorce was final a few months ago.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I worry about the girls. Piper was two. She barely even knew Kate before she left. She sometimes acts out, and she’s been wetting the bed more often since all this happened. Ava gets super whiny and clingy sometimes. And Nora … well, you’ve seen how she acts. She’s struggling. And I want to make it better for all of them. Some days, I just don’t know how.”
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
He let out a little breath as a mix of confusion and awe crossed his face. “Nobody ever asks me that. They’re always more concerned about the girls.”
“It must be hard for you too. You spent all those years with her. ”
“It would’ve been so much worse if I hadn’t gotten full custody. I know without the girls, I’d be very lonely in this big house all by myself. Sometimes, when I’m here alone, all the memories come crashing down around me.”
He looked toward the fireplace and seemed a little choked up, so I rested my hand on his arm comfortingly. The firelight reflected off his watery eyes.
“Sorry.” He glanced over at me. “I don’t usually get emotional about this anymore.”
“Do you still love her?”
“There will always be love there for the woman I first married, and I miss what we had at one time, but it was over long before she left.”
The room was quiet for long moments, with only the sound of the wood crackling before us.
“I wonder how long the power will be out.” I broke the silence.
“Hopefully not long. If the roads weren’t so bad, I would suggest we go over to George and Marjie’s. They have a wood furnace and a generator, so they’re nice and toasty over there, and they have some power.”
“That’s good. I might need to go out to my car to charge my phone later. It’s at about twenty percent, and I don’t want it to go dead.”
He held a finger in the air and got up, returning not long after with a small external charger and charging cord. “I keep this charged up in the car just in case.”
“Perfect.” I plugged my phone in, and it buzzed to show it was charging.
He sat down again, and I could’ve sworn he sat even closer to me than before.
“We should do something to pass the time,” he said .
“Like what?” I could imagine a thing or two that would definitely keep us warmer, and I blushed to myself, surprised by my thoughts.
“Boggle?”
That wasn’t exactly what I’d been thinking, but it was the smarter option.
“Sure.”