23. Ty
Chapter 23
Ty
T hey went around the paddock two more times, at which point, Trevor began making tearful sounds and reaching for Ty. Inside of a heartbeat, Michelle was in the paddock, rushing to get to her boy, unsettling the horses as she came close. Ty was able to slow Honey to a standstill so Michelle could wrap her arms around her youngest and hold him tight.
“You did so good, Trevor,” she said, clasping his tiny hand in hers as she settled him on her hip. “Such a handsome cowboy you are.”
“Am I a handsome cowboy, too, Mama?” asked Gareth.
“Yes, you are,” said Michelle. “The handsomest.”
Ty looked up to see Zeke standing at Jigsaw’s head, holding the mare steady, and that Gareth looked like he felt he was missing out on his mama’s hugs.
“Maybe that’s it for the day?” asked Ty. “We can do this again next week. Right Hudson?”
“Absolutely,” said Hudson. “Maybe I’ll even ride next time.”
Zeke and Cal offered to unsaddle, groom, and put the horses back in the pasture so Hudson and Ty could take the little family to dinner and then to the fire pit, in anticipation of a campfire and s’mores.
That’s when the wind blew Ty’s hat off his head, and he looked up to see that clouds had pillowed over the ridge. He could smell rain in the air and knew that his request to the universe had been answered. He needed to be alone with Hudson, and sooner rather than later.
“Looks like rain,” said Hudson. “They cancel the campfires when it rains, and the men have movie night, which can get rowdy?—”
“I think we should go back to the inn,” Michelle said. She had one boy in her arms, and the other one leaned against her, his cowboy hat askew. “We’ll have leftovers, and I’ll put the boys to bed early. But maybe we can do this next week and save our energy for the campfire then?”
“That sounds good,” said Hudson. “Oh, there’s Gabe.”
Ty turned to look. Gabe was coming up to them, a resigned expression on his face, but Ty knew what he was going to say before he did.
“It’s going to rain,” said Gabe. “I’m so sorry, Mrs. Blackwell. I know you and your boys were looking forward to s’mores.”
“We were,” she said. “But I’d like to come back next Sunday and try again?”
“You are more than welcome,” said Gabe. “Plan on eating in the mess tent, and we’ll be sure to make it special for your boys.”
By the time they got to the silver truck, it was sprinkling, and the sunlight had been replaced by sparkles in the air. If Ty was being honest with himself, he was exhausted, and very glad that the kid portion of the day was over.
Oh, sure, the small boys were adorable angels, and Michelle was a lovely woman, but he wanted to be alone with Hudson. He wanted to strip off his clothes and walk in the rain while he got his head straight, but he had to wait for Hudson to drive them back to the Iron Mountain Inn in Farthing. For the goodbyes to be said, and for Hudson to hand over the forty dollars that Gabe had given him.
“When you go to the tavern for a hot meal for dinner,” Hudson said. “Be sure to put it on the Fresh Start Program’s tab. No arguments, okay? And the money is for gas and treats for the boys on the drive home.”
“You’re sweet,” said Michelle. She rose on her toes to give him a quick kiss on his cheek.
“Say goodbye to your Uncle Hudson,” she said to Gareth and Trevor, who dutifully, albeit silently, waved at Hudson. “And to his friend Ty.”
Ty received the same waves and watched as Michelle and her boys went into their room and shut the door. It was raining hard as he and Hudson drove back to the valley, the wipers doing double time.
“Everything okay?” asked Hudson.
Ty could feel those warm brown eyes looking at him and hardly knew how to explain what he was feeling.
Maybe he was unsettled by seeing a happy family, Hudson’s new happy family. And though he felt that the end of summer would not be the end of his relationship with Hudson, it was hard to hold on to that. Hudson already had a plan. Get his license. Move to Scottsbluff. Drive a rig. Be happy forever.
As for Ty? The one place he’d been hoping to get a job flat out didn’t want him. He could get a job somewhere else, or maybe his being an ex-con would mean that he’d have to go to work some place horrible, where they didn’t ride the range, but only delivered hay to cattle when the temperature got cold. That wasn’t any kind of life.
“Can you hurry?” he asked, his voice low.
“Can you tell me what’s going on in your head?” asked Hudson as the truck surged along the road when Hudson put his foot on the gas. Hudson only slowed to get down the switchbacks, screeching to a halt in the parking lot, turning off the engine as he turned to face Ty.
“What is it, Ty?” asked Hudson in a very soft voice as the rain pattered on the windshield.
Ty shook his head and let himself out of the truck, closing the door quietly in spite of his temptation to close it with a loud thud to distract his brain from unproductive thoughts.
But he couldn’t walk fast enough to outpace Hudson, not with his long legs. Ty could hear Hudson’s boots splashing along the path behind him, all the way until they reached their tent.
It wasn’t even dinner time, not yet dark, but the rain cast a low gloom all around, though Ty didn’t want to turn on the light to see. Hudson came in right behind him and for a moment the two of them stood in the near darkness, not saying anything.
“Please talk to me,” said Hudson, his voice so soft and low it sent shivers up Ty’s spine. His life had been a struggle, and then it had been good, and now, once more, it was a struggle.
He sat to take off his damp boots and then stood to shed the rest of his clothes. His skin sighed with the peace of it, of nothing rubbing against it, making it itch. He turned to see Hudson standing there, utterly still. A bit of light caught in his eyes, pinpoints of focus.
Hudson didn’t say anything like Don’t forget your flip-flops , but he started by echoing Ty’s movements. He sat to take off his boots and socks and then stood to take off the rest of his damp clothes.
“What are you doing?” asked Ty in a whisper.
“I’m going with you,” said Hudson. “It’s not even dark yet and someone’s going to catch us if we don’t keep an eye out.”
This was so like Hudson, to be supportive without really seeming to be. Just a good friend. Just someone who was there.
After summer was over, he wouldn’t be there, and Ty would be on his own. Where would the wind take him? How would the roads rise and fall? Where would he end up?
Ty slipped on his flip-flops and didn’t wait for Hudson. His heart was beating so hard, and he felt hot all over. But the moment he stepped out of the tent onto the wooden platform, the cool late-season rain swept all over him, taking away the heat and scratch of his skin, replacing it with silky ribbons of relief.
He heard Hudson behind him and went down the wooden steps to follow the path. Away from the main compound, away from the mess tent, away from everything, and into the woods.
He’d not been this way before, and it didn’t look like anyone went this way much, for the path was narrow and not well trod. The pine trees were thick on either side and dripped silver rainwater on his head.
Beneath the pines, a mist was forming. Maybe it was his imagination, but he thought he would walk on forever and forever, until he reached the edge of the valley and would have to turn around or start walking up the side of the ridge.
Up ahead was a narrow wooden footbridge that stretched across the rain-marked slow-moving river. On the other side were clumps of river willows, bending beneath the rain, tossing their frail-looking green leaves in the cool breeze. He stopped, settling his shoulders, and tilted his head back so he was face up in the rain.
Behind him he felt a motion, a sense of warmth, and knew it was Hudson, coming to stand behind him. Hudson reached to clasp his hand, as though Ty had been lost and now was found.
“Where even are we?” asked Hudson.
Ty looked over at Hudson, who was looking at him. Hudson’s russet-dark hair was plastered to his head, rain-laced and looking as though someone had poured strings of silver over him. More rain sparkled along his strong jaw and drops quivered on his shoulders.
Maybe he was truly cold, but Ty only felt cool all over. He watched drops of rain slide down Hudson’s arms, strong from work, silky wet with rain.
Ty had never been to this part of the valley before. It felt new, like he’d stepped to the edge of the known world, though that was foolish. It was just the other side of the valley, the last bit of woods maintained by the ex-cons, inches from where the land rose and grew truly wild.
“Over there,” said Hudson.
He tugged on Ty’s hand and together they walked over the footbridge to the other side. Which was where Hudson drew Ty into the shadows of the river willows. There, the rain dripped intermittently on Ty’s skin, and the air was spicy with the scent of damp willows.
Hudson drew Ty close, wrapping his arms around Ty’s waist, pulling him until their hips were touching, naked, rain-drenched skin connecting all up and down.
Ty shivered, as though his body didn’t know what he wanted. It wanted to be in the rain, all cool, almost drowning. And now here it was, held and warmed by Hudson’s body.
He could feel every bit of Hudson, the strength in his arms, the taut muscles in his thighs. The warmth of his groin. The stillness of his watchfulness.
“I think something happened,” said Hudson. “From yesterday to today. Only I don’t know what it is.”
Ty could hardly find the words to describe the blister of heat that seemed to be expanding inside of him. Only the rain kept it at bay. Only Hudson’s concerned expression kept it at bay. If Ty let the words out, it would be as though he’d spat poison in Hudson’s face.
“Tell me,” said Hudson. He raised one hand away from Ty’s waist, and his fingers were tender along Ty’s jaw. To his surprise, Hudson laughed low in his throat, and he was smiling.
“I’m naked here in the woods. In the rain. With you.”
Hudson tipped his head until their foreheads were touching, and the rain slipped from the roof of the willows across Hudson’s smile. He kissed Ty gently, and Ty could taste the warmth of Hudson’s mouth and the coolness of the rain, and if the world ended then and there, it couldn’t get any better than that.
“So, tell me,” whispered Hudson against Ty’s mouth. “I can’t get any more vulnerable than this. You can trust a naked man, can’t you?” Hudson pulled back to look at him, flecks of rain on his dark eyebrows sparkling. “Trust me just this once?”
There was a gentleness in Hudson’s voice that Ty could hardly resist. He wasn’t in prison anymore. He was in the woods with Hudson. He wasn’t in the chain gang anymore. He was inside the safe circle of Hudson’s arms.
The rattle in his head seemed to want to drag him back to the hot box, but Hudson’s touch was like an anchor, holding him steady while his brain whirled.
When Hudson kissed him again, a safe softness swirled around him, drowning the rattle. Calming the movement and the blistered feel of his soul. He drew a shaky breath and wrapped his arms around Hudson’s damp waist.
“It’s hard to hold on,” said Ty, not sure what he meant, but he was grateful as Hudson’s arms tightened around him. “I feel lost.”
“I found you,” said Hudson, though he couldn’t possibly understand what Ty meant. But he cared. He’d stripped to the skin and followed Ty into the rain, and now he deserved answers to his very gentle and concerned questions.
“I think—” began Ty with a sigh as he tasted rainwater in his mouth. “I think you will have a life and I won’t.” He wanted to explain how he’d be lost without Hudson, but that might pressure Hudson into saying that, of course, he wanted the same. Hudson was a good guy. He deserved to be happy without dragging Ty behind him.
“What do you mean?” asked Hudson, his dark brows drawing low. He was shivering too, and Ty knew it wasn’t fair. Hudson didn’t need this like he did.
“You have Michelle and the boys,” said Ty, all in a rush. It would hurt less to say it fast. “You’ll probably get that driving job with a base in Scottsbluff. You’ll be fine. You won’t need—” Ty paused. “Me.”
“Jesus Christ.” Hudson’s mouth was a firm line, and he was glaring at Ty. “That’s not it at all.”
He pulled Ty close until no rainwater could get between them.
“I’m taking you with me,” he said, low, urgent, his breath warm on Ty’s cheek. “Whatever happens, I’m not leaving you behind.” He drew back and looked at Ty, his expression hard, as if Ty was being foolish. “You and me. We’ll figure it out. Okay?”
Ty didn’t know the answer to that question. What he did know was that the rattle and heat inside of him, making him itch all over, had dimmed and cooled and was slowly fading away.
The rain had done it. And Hudson’s touch had done it. The words he spoke. The steady expression on his face. Ty could believe all of this, if he let himself trust. In Hudson. In how the valley had brought them together.