Chapter 20
T he Sunday morning sun slanted through the trees as JJ Walker pulled his truck onto the wide gravel drive, dust trailing behind him.
The sermon today had been good—simple, and peaceful, and familiar.
The sound of Pastor Knowlton’s voice seemed embedded in JJ’s mind, as he’d grown up listening to the pastor preach.
Today, he’d talked about weathering storms, and how we can always look to the Savior and find a sense of calm. As he’d spoken, he’d dimmed the wall in front of the right-hand side pews, and gradually, a gorgeous painting of Christ walking on water during a dark, stormy night had come to life.
JJ didn’t feel like he was currently being tossed to and fro, scared the vessel he rode in might suddenly be plunged into the deep. But a growing, incessant gnawing restlessness had carved out a place in his chest and wouldn’t go away.
“It’s just because this is your first year with pregnant cows,” he said to himself as he drove past the house, where Ruby’s car still sat out front. So she hadn’t gone over to Clara Jean’s ahead of him as she’d said she might.
His sister was hosting them for a Sabbath Day lunch, as she sometimes did.
JJ loved going to his sister’s house, because she’d married his best friend, and JJ enjoyed spending time with both of them.
Ruby and Clara Jean had become fast friends too, and though they lived somewhat different lives, they were close in age, liked a lot of the same things, and got along really well.
Ruby hadn’t come with JJ to church that day, because she’d had yet another restless night, with severe heartburn and an upset stomach that had forced her to retreat to the couch.
“I just feel bad keeping you awake,” she’d told him, and JJ could admit he slept better when she wasn’t sighing or coughing or trying to find a comfortable way to be.
Still, he missed her in bed, and he’d swept a kiss along her hairline before he’d headed out to the ranch at dawn’s first light.
He still hadn’t been back for longer than to shower and throw on his church clothes, at which time, he’d found Ruby in her pajamas in bed. She didn’t seem to have a fever, and she said she’d only been dozing for the past hour.
“I might go ahead to CJ’s and help her with the rolls,” she’d told him. But with her car still out front, she hadn’t done that.
And JJ wanted to check on his herd again. For the first time, he’d bred his longhorns this past spring, and he expected calves as early as Christmas. He had about fifteen pregnant cows, though some of them wouldn’t deliver until February.
JJ didn’t particularly enjoy calving season, because it meant a lot of monitoring, and he sometimes had to go out in the middle of the night to help with a birth.
Now that he’d taken over his father’s part of Seven Sons Ranch completely—and added his own land and this longhorn herd—JJ had actually hired more cowboys to work during calving season.
That way, he could assign late-night and early-morning shifts to them…and stay in bed himself. Sawyer, Uncle Skyler’s son, had started taking on more responsibilities from his daddy, and JJ fully expected to be working together with his cousin in only a few more months.
JJ’s daddy and Uncle Skyler had been working Seven Sons together for years, so the situation wasn’t new. It just felt new to JJ. Every step. Every day, though he’d been back in Three Rivers and on the ranch for over three years now.
The daily unpredictability was actually something JJ really liked about ranching. Even something as simple as the temperature could make a day a total nightmare or purely pleasant.
Right now, he parked outside the big barn he’d expanded behind the house, killed the engine, and dropped from the truck. Yes, he’d checked his longhorns this morning. First thing, of course.
But he wanted to make sure they had plenty to eat and drink, as pregnancy in cattle could be unpredictable.
He kept all the cows in the big pasture attached to the back of the barn, giving them plenty of room to spread out among the Panhandle scrub brush and trees while still keeping them somewhat contained.
His boots echoed against the concrete floor of the barn, and he relaxed when he pushed open the doors and stepped onto the grass. Several longhorns loitered nearby. Still there. Still pregnant. Still beautiful.
“Howdy, ladies,” JJ said with a smile, the knot that had lodged itself in his chest loosening somewhat.
Violet lowed at him and lumbered forward. She’d be four years old this spring, and JJ had made the conscious decision not to breed his cattle until they were at least three. He had a few older cows who’d been bred previous to coming to JJ’s ranch, but this was Violet’s first calf.
“How you feelin’?” he asked her as she approached the fence where he stood. She’d been in the first round of breeding and her belly swayed side to side as she lumbered forward. “Maybe you’ll have your calf be the first of the season.”
He grinned at her, several more cows coming toward him now. “I don’t have any apples, ladies.” He chuckled as their protests became louder. “You ate them all this morning, and I haven’t been to Clara Jean’s yet.”
His sister always sent him home with the smaller pieces of fruit, as well as anything bruised or deformed, as she couldn’t put such items on the shelves at Wilde & Organic.
None of the cows were all that happy to see him without apples, but they crowded at the fence, their horns getting in the way. “You guys go on,” he said. “I was just checkin’ in.”
And he needed to get home and do the same with Ruby. He hoped she’d felt well enough to get up and get herself some breakfast. His stomach growled as he turned his back on his longhorns and headed back into the barn.
He could definitely use lunch himself, and he’d eaten breakfast. JJ got behind the wheel of the truck and parked back behind the house, opting to go up the steps there and into the house through the back door.
That introduced him to the kitchen instead of the living room, where he expected to find Ruby.
But she wasn’t there.
“Princess?” he called, swiping his cowboy hat from his head and hanging it on a hook beside the door. The silence in the house didn’t sit right with him, and he added some noice to the place with his boots and by flipping on the kitchen faucet.
He couldn’t even imagine living in a place without water, his thoughts flowing to Brandon and Lenore living out on her homestead.
He hadn’t decided if he could make the long drive north to help with the solar tomorrow or not, and he supposed if Ruby was feeling better, his own ranch could spare him for several hours.
He warmed his cold hands with hot water, then shrugged out of his jacket and tossed it onto the back of a dining room chair. “Ruby?” he called.
Still no answer. He moved into the living room, where the ticking of his grandfather’s clock greeted him.
But Ruby had not found a napping spot on the couch.
It still looked like she’d been there, but that was from her fitful night.
He frowned at the wadded up blanket and headed down the hall to the master suite.
Worry curled tighter inside him, especially when he found the bedroom door closed. He’d left it ajar when he’d left for church.
That just means she’s been up , he told himself. He reached it and listened but couldn’t hear anything. Twisting the knob gently, he eased the door open and peeked inside.
Ruby lay in bed, curled on her side with her back to him, her dark auburn hair spilling over her pillow like flames licking toward his side of the bed. He hadn’t made much noise, and she didn’t stir even as he entered the room and walked across the carpet toward her.
“Scarlet,” he murmured as he knelt down in front of her. She was gloriously beautiful in that moment, and JJ didn’t want to wake her. But it was almost noon and they were meant to be at Tate and Clara Jean’s soon.
He reached out and brushed her bangs back from her temple, moving slowly and softly. “Ruby?” he asked again. “It’s probably time to wake up, Princess.”
She blinked her eyes open slowly, a sleepy smile lifting one corner of her mouth. “Hey,” she whispered, her voice raspy.
“You’re still feeling that bad?” he asked, rising to perch on the edge of the bed, his hand now resting on her back. “What can I get you?”
“I’m just tired,” she said.
“Did you manage to eat anything?”
“Only a little yogurt,” she whispered. She’d awakened fully, and her eyes shone with a light JJ had seen before. She freed her arm from beneath the blanket and reached for something on her nightstand. “Jay, there’s something….”
She picked up an object and handed it to him. JJ looked at the white object in his hand, knowing exactly what it was though he’d never seen one before.
A pregnancy test.
“Are the—there’s two lines on this.” He looked at his wife, his eyebrows practically flying off his forehead. “What does—I don’t know what that means.”
Ruby grinned at him, and hope mingled with adrenaline inside him. He didn’t dare believe his lovely wife would be pregnant with his baby, but he wanted that so badly. They hadn’t exactly been trying to get pregnant, but they hadn’t been trying not to.
She put her hand over his and gently turned his hand over. The key to the test sat there, and JJ sucked in a breath. It only added to the knot in his chest, which somehow slid down and took root in his stomach.
He had no idea what to say.
“We’re going to have a baby,” Ruby said.
JJ pulled his attention to her, catching her joyous smile. But he couldn’t make his mouth match hers, for his heart stopped. Just gone right to sleep there inside his chest, something that really shouldn’t happen to human beings.
Then, as if shocked back to life, his pulse thundered through his body the way a herd of wild mustangs would thud their hooves against the ground when spooked.
He swallowed, if only to keep his heartbeat contained in his body. Finally, a slow grin broke across his face, spreading like sunrise across the ranch. A deep, quiet laugh rumbled out of him, and he leaned forward, pressing his forehead to hers.
“A baby,” he whispered, as if he didn’t dare believe such a thing could happen to them. “I hope she has your red hair.”
“Bite your tongue,” Ruby said. “No one wants red hair.”
JJ kissed her and stroked his hands through her hair. “I love your red hair.” He pulled back and studied her. “I love you, Scarlet. I can’t believe you’re going to have a baby.”
She tugged him forward and scooted back at the same time. JJ crawled into bed with her, feeling a bit foreign on this side of the bed. The sheets were warm though, and he curled one arm under Ruby as she moved to cuddle into his chest.
His other hand slid down her arm to her belly, where he rested it gently. “When do you think you’ll be due?” He didn’t dare speak much louder than the humming of the furnace, for he wanted this moment to stay sacred, just the two of them on the brink of so much change.
“June, maybe?” she guessed. “I don’t know. I’ll need to find a doctor and all of that.” She didn’t sound the least bit scared, and JJ fell in love with her all over again.
He, however, kept his mouth shut, because he suddenly couldn’t imagine having to care for a helpless newborn. Sometimes, he couldn’t even keep himself fed and looked after.
As he lay there, a streak of fear ruining his moment, the image of Jesus emerged in his mind. He didn’t need to fear. Not only did he have his amazing wife to lean on, his whole family lived here in Three Rivers.
And no matter what, JJ could always go to the Lord for help too. He’d light the darkest night and calm the most violent seas.
He could help JJ be a good father too.
“I love you, Ruby,” he whispered.
“Mm, love you too, Jay.”