Chapter Four
Hi Shayna
Sounds like you keep life interesting if not glamorous. Lots of variety in those jobs of yours. Do you enjoy them? If you work at a barn mucking out stalls, do you ride? I was thinking that we might not have anything in common but that might be something.
Ha! Now, I’m wondering if I should delete that in case you don’t ride. But we might as well be honest, right?
Chance told me that you also teach classes at the gym – what kind of classes? I probably shouldn’t admit this but – again, in the interest of being honest – I’m swinging between picturing you as a pretty gym-babe one minute, and a female bodybuilder with a mustache and a mean streak, who might kick my ass for me, the next. (Not saying that there’s anything wrong with bodybuilders – they’re just not my type.)
I want to ask you for a photo so bad – but I also kind of feel like that might change how we get to know each other. What do you think? I don’t want you to be wondering if I’m fugly. So, if you’re worried about that, I’ll send you one. I should admit that April told me you’re a hot blonde, and Chance confirmed that – he said that you kind of remind him of Hope. So, this might be a bit one-sided. For all you know, I might be a Shrek lookalike!
I love that you know what you want to do in life – and that you’re working your ass off to make it happen. How many years of school do you have left before you’ll be able to do the kind of work you really want to? And you thanked me for my service, I want to say thank you , too. So many folks struggle after they come home. In theory, there’s support available, but … I guess you know the statistics on how many opt out before they get the support they need.
Ugh, I don’t want to sound like an asshole, but I have to be honest. Do you know how many vets aren’t interested in therapy? How many don’t want to feel like they need help or even if they don’t mind admitting that they need it, they don’t want to talk to do-gooders who don’t really understand what they’re going through?
Really not trying to be an asshole here. Not calling you a do-gooder either, that’s just how some vets see it. I just hope you know what you’re likely going to face. Even after you study for years and work your ass off to become a therapist, it might be difficult to make the kind of difference you want to. Hope you’re not mad at me for saying it.
Anyway – on to other stuff. I should tell you more about me. You probably guessed from my username – or April told you – that I’m one of six brothers and we have two sisters as well. I’m the second to the youngest, but only by about twenty minutes. Kolby’s my twin, and he claims that I elbowed him out the way so that I could go first. He might be right about that; we’re twins but we’re not identical in looks or personality.
He’s more laid back. Hmm, that doesn’t sound great, does it? It’s not that I’m not laid back, I just like to get shit done. Not that Kolby doesn’t – damn, I’m not explaining this well, am I?
As for the rest of them, Cash is the eldest, and going down in age, there’s Ford, Wade, Tanner, then the girls – they’re twins as well – Laney and Janey, then me and Kolby. Our mom died when me and Kolby were real small. (Reading back through before I hit send. I don’t want you to think I’m dumb; I know it should be Kolby and I, but that’s not how I talk. If I feel like I have to be on my best behavior here, I don’t think there’s much point, is there?) Our dad’s still around but we don’t see him. Long story that I won’t bore you with yet.
And I just noticed how long this got. I’ll wrap it up. Kolby came over to see me and I want to hang out with him for a while. Plus, I’m sure you don’t have time to read pages and pages between all your jobs. If this is too long, tell me, and I’ll keep it shorter next time.
Don’t want you to think that I’m all self-absorbed though, I told you about me – what about you? What’s your family situation?
Hope you’re having a good day and not working too hard.
Tyler
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Hi Tyler.
Wow, I like that you’re keeping it real. I’ll do the same. You’re right – there’s no point trying to pretend to be someone we’re not. The first thing I want to do is tell you that just because I’m emailing at midnight on a Saturday night, it doesn’t mean that I’m a party animal. I told you I work at the resort. I’ve been picking up shifts behind the bar at the restaurant there – it’s called The Boathouse. It’s a fun place. They have a regular band who plays there most weekends – they’re really good, the drummer is April’s fiancé, Eddie. Sometimes, like tonight, it gets super busy in there because Clay McAdam gets up and sings with them.
I’m assuming that you know who Clay McAdam is, but I might be wrong. Just because you’re a cowboy, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you like or even know about country music, does it? What kind of music do you like? I love country – but maybe that’s not something we have in common.
And yes, I do ride. I love it, but I don’t get the chance very often – no time. Whenever I’m at the barn, I’m trying to get as many stalls clean as possible before anyone else arrives. At least, that used to be the case. These days, my little brother, Booker, works there with me in the mornings, we’re there from 7 till 10 most mornings. He’s awesome, and he’s a hard worker, too.
And haha, I promise you that I’m not a bodybuilder with a mustache and a mean streak. I don’t think I’m exactly a pretty gym-babe either, though – sorry. I mean, I think I’m okay-looking but to me, a pretty gym-babe would care more about her clothes, hair, and makeup than I do. I don’t get to spend as much time in the gym as I’d like, either. Oh, and I teach Pilates classes. I am certified as a personal trainer, but I don’t work with clients anymore. I probably should, the money’s better, but I’m not very good at marketing myself or asking people for money.
I don’t know about exchanging photos. I have it in my head that you’re … lol, don’t know which word to use. Let’s be on the safe side and say attractive. I’m definitely not thinking that you might be fugly! Love that word! April said that you’re hot. And Hope did, too – although you should have seen Chance’s face when she said that!! So, no, I don’t think I need to see your photo yet – but the curiosity might kill me! It’s like you said, it might change the way we get to know each other, and I like chatting with you like this. (This is me adding in as I read through before sending – I REALLY want to see what you look like! I’m not afraid to send you a photo of myself, either. Part of me thinks it’s stupid not to – what if there’s no attraction? Another part of me loves the intrigue and wants to keep it going.)
Oh, and before I forget, no your message wasn’t too long – I love it! Sometimes I might only shoot you a quick reply, but if I do it’s only because I have to get to work. I’d rather send you something short than leave you dangling.
And wow! You’re one of eight kids! Do you all get along? Does everyone still live there in … is it Livingston where you live? That’s what your profile says, but since it’s a ranch, I’m guessing it’s out of town a ways?
As for me, I have my little brother, Booker. And then … there’s more to my story, too, and I’ll explain it to you someday – if we get that far, if we ever meet up, if you don’t ghost me when you see my photo or something, haha! – For now, the easiest way to explain it is that I was adopted. My mom’s awesome! She used to work a government job, but she retired from that and moved to Summer Lake when she rescued some horses from a kill pen. She boarded them at the barn where I work. My dad’s awesome, too. He was in the Army – he was Special Forces. He and his friend run security for Clay McAdam.
And what else? Oh, I’m not offended at all by what you said – you’re right. I know a lot of vets think that therapy and therapists are a waste of time. I get it. I really do. I know that’s going to be one of my biggest obstacles. I’m under no illusions, but I appreciate you trying to warn me. If I were some starry-eyed idealist, you’d be doing me a big favor by warning me. I’m not, though. I know it’s going to be an uphill battle, but that doesn’t put me off. I know I can help.
I’m kind of lucky in that there’s a whole bunch of former Special Forces guys who live here in town. Most of them are older. There’s a mix of Marines, Navy SEALs, and others, my adopted dad used to be a Delta Force operator. So, I have lots of friends I can ask for input and advice.
I also have another job that I work sometimes. I was easing you in gently to just how many jobs I really work! That one’s at a new sports bar on the other side of the lake. A couple who are both around our age took the place over and they’ve really turned it around. But the point is that he used to be a Navy SEAL, too. The other guys are all my dad’s age, but the guy who owns the sports bar said that if I want, he can put me in touch with some of the younger guys who might be more open to talking to me about the different approaches.
Shoot, I know this is getting long, and I really need to get to sleep. But one more thing – I have to tell you that I want to specialize in hypnotherapy. I know it can really help. One of the SEAL guys here in town went to see a hypnotherapist in Salt Lake City and it’s helped him so much. But my point is that if you think hypnotherapy is hokey – and I know a lot of people do – then we might not have enough in common.
Gah! I want to delete that last bit. I really like talking to you so far, but I think it’s important that as well as looking for things we have in common, we should probably look for dealbreakers, too.
Okay. I’m going to hit send before I chicken out. My turn to say that I hope I hear back from you – and totally understand if I don’t.
Goodnight.
Shayna.
PS – but I hope I do.
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Hi Shayna.
Sorry I didn’t answer in time for you to see it before you went to the barn this morning. I sleep in on Sundays – I get weekends off from working at the lodge. Lol, and since I don’t want to sound like a slacker compared to you, I’ll tell you that I help around the ranch instead. Yesterday I worked with Tanner and Kolby, bringing on a bunch of youngsters. Tanner’s in charge when it comes to the horses, but we all pitch in. Ford’s in charge of the herd – the cattle – but we all pitch in when he needs us, too. There’s a bunch of full-time wranglers who work the herd. Not going to call them cowboys in case you like the sound of them better than the sound of me!
Anyway – damn, girl! They ain’t kidding when they say it’s a small world, are they? I don’t even know where to start. Actually yeah, I do. Most important, I don’t think that hypnotherapy is hokey – far from it. I have a teammate who’s been seeing a hypnotherapist, are you ready for this? – in Salt Lake City! It’s really helping him.
Even if it weren’t for that, I’m fascinated by the idea, although I don’t know much about it. Another of my teammates used hypnotherapy to stop smoking, and he just quit after one session. He’d tried everything before that and couldn’t kick the habit! So yeah, although I think you’re right that we should be smart and see if we can find any red flags before we get too invested, you don’t need to worry about me not believing in what you do.
Okay, back to the small world thing. I know there’s the April connection, and Chance, too – side note, I would love to have seen his face when Hope said I was hot! And don’t worry, I’m not going to get all big headed about that – I bet what she really said was “Those MacFarland boys” – it’s a family thing. It seems that not many people consider us fugly!
But besides the people we already know we have in common, are you ready for a whole long list of other connections?
This other job, at the sports bar? I’m guessing that the couple who owns it is Xander and Tori? Get this – Kolby and I served with Xander. I told you I was in the Navy, the part I didn’t mention is that I was a SEAL. Now, I wonder if you’ll think I’m bullshitting you. I’m not. I figured it was a detail that I could share later. If I opened with that, you might think I was arrogant, or on the other hand – shit, I can’t believe I’m going to say this but … some women see SEALs as … in the same way that some men see hot women – as a kind of trophy. Ugh, this is another one of those parts that I wonder if I should delete but … moving on.
So yeah, if you want to know more about me, you can ask Xander – or if you’re more comfortable with her, ask Tori. She’s a sweetheart. I don’t know her as well as I know him, but I spent some time around her when Xander was acting as her security guy. Do you know about that? You know that she was a backup singer for Calypso Rayne? Xander went on Callie’s last tour as part of the security team. That team was led by … Kolby! I went and helped out on a couple of the tour dates. And that leads us to another connection.
I do like country music – and that’s a good thing since my twin brother is now married to one of country’s biggest stars – Calypso Rayne, she’s just Callie to us. She’s a sweetheart.
Lol, and I know damn well who Clay McAdam is. Obviously, he owns the label that Callie’s signed with, but he also comes to the valley sometimes to visit Summer – Summer Breese is married to a good friend of ours, Carter Remington.
So, we have a whole lot of people in common. I wanted to circle back around to the hypnotherapist in Salt Lake, though. I don’t know if he’s the same guy your friend went to see but I reckon he might be. His name is Eli Thompson. I don’t know him personally, but it was my brother, Cash, who suggested that my buddy should see him. If you like I can ask Cash to get in touch with him and ask if he’d be willing to chat with you about what he does.
Anyway, this got long again. I need to get to work – not in the same sense that you mean when you say that. On Sundays we have a big family lunch here at the big house. The big house is the ranch house – I live here and so do Tanner and Ford. Kolby and Callie have a cabin on the ranch and so do Wade and his fiancée, Sierra, they have two awesome little kids, Mateo and Maya, who they adopted. But the point was, all the family who’s in town come to the house for lunch on Sundays, and I’m the chef so I need to get to work.
Do you get the rest of Sunday off? And what about you? Where do you live? There’s so much we still don’t know, isn’t there? And I have to tell you – I want to know. I’m enjoying this.
Hope you get some rest after the barn today.
Ty
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Hi Ty! (Yes, I noticed! Yes, I like it!)
I can’t believe that you and Xander were teammates! I mean, I can – I’m not saying that I don’t believe you. But what are the odds? And you really wouldn’t mind if I asked him and Tori about you? I’m just leaving the barn now, going to run home and shower and then I’m going to Violets – that’s the name of their sports bar in case you don’t know. I always feel like I have to explain that because it doesn’t sound like a sports bar. Anyway, sorry. Tori called and asked if I can help with lunch since someone called in sick. I’m only going to cover for a couple of hours, though.
I try to keep my Sunday afternoons sacred. Like you, it’s the time that I hang out with my family. It’s not a big crowd like you. It’s just the four of us, but it’s special. I told you I was adopted, but it’s a bit more complicated than that. I’ll explain it one day. But none of us really has anyone else. Well, Davin – my adopted dad, has two brothers but they don’t live here.
Anyway, this was supposed to be just a quickie to make sure you wouldn’t mind me asking Xander and Tori about you. I know you said I should but …
Gah! I have to go. You probably won’t even see this till later anyway. You’ll be toiling over a hot stove. I should warn you that I am not a good cook. I’m not terrible or anything but I never really learned, and like with everything else, I don’t have the time.
Oh, and Eli Thompson is the same guy!! I appreciate the offer to put me in touch but my adopted mom – Alexis – I should just start calling them by their names. I don’t call them mom and dad, and I’m less worried about giving away too many details now, I don’t think you’re an axe murderer who will track me down – and even if you were, I already gave more than enough info, didn’t I? Oops!
Okay. Hope you enjoy your family lunch.
More later – I still have so much more I want to say to your last message!
Shay.
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Hey Shay
Absolutely, ask Xander and Tori whatever you want to know about me. I’m glad you have that option. I have nothing to hide. Then again, tell Xander I said that if he shares any embarrassing stories about me, I’ll kick his ass for him next time I see him.
Gotta go. Toiling over a hot stove here. Hope you still get some time with your family when you finish work.
Ty
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Thank you! I just arrived at Violets. I’ll let you know what they say about you. Lol, unless it’s something horrible! I don’t think it will be though. I probably shouldn’t admit that I’m excited to talk to your friends, should I? Then again, I probably gave it away already by answering you before I even get into work. Oh well, sticking with being honest – I love chatting with you so far.