Chapter 9
As the sun dipped below the horizon and painted the sky in hues of gold and crimson, Aiden sat by the edge of the loch, still dripping from his swim.
He was mostly naked, save for the thin linen shirt clinging to his damp skin.
The cool breeze chilled him, but it did little to slow his racing thoughts.
Malcolm sat beside Aiden, their legs dangling over the rocky shore, and passed him a flask. “What’s really botherin’ ye, Aiden?” His voice was casual, but his eyes were sharp with concern.
Aiden took a swig from the flask, feeling the burn of the whisky warm him from the inside. He exhaled deeply, staring out at the still waters of the loch. “’Tis complicated, Mal.”
Malcolm chuckled, giving Aiden a playful shove. “Complicated, ye say? We’ve faced storms at sea, pirates, and God kens what else. Ye faced those head-on. This cannae be that bad.”
Aiden shook his head, a reluctant smile tugging at his lips. “Ye’re too smart for yer own good, sometimes.”
“Nay, I’m just yer braither. And ye cannae fool me.” Malcolm grinned, his gaze steady. “So, out with it.”
Aiden hesitated, then stood up and slipped his breeches and boots back on. The damp fabric clung to his legs as he moved, but the whisky eased the discomfort. He took another long sip before handing the flask back to Malcolm.
“I dinnae like her,” he finally admitted, his voice low.
“Who? Katie?” Malcolm’s eyebrows shot up in mock surprise, returning the flask after taking a sip. “Ye’ve never wanted anythin’ more, from what I’ve seen.”
Aiden groaned as he took the flask, rubbing a hand over his face. “’Tis nae like that. I dinnae like how desperate she is for a husband. It feels… wrong.”
Malcolm laughed, a hearty sound that echoed across the loch. “That’s how women are, Aiden. They’re raised to find husbands.”
Aiden’s expression darkened, his voice taking on a sharper edge. “Katie’s nae like that. She’s in a precarious position. Her choices are limited.”
Malcolm raised an eyebrow, leaning back on his hands as he considered Aiden’s words. “Then send her away. Let her faither marry her off to someone else.”
Aiden’s grip tightened on the flask before he thrust it back into Malcolm’s hand with more force than necessary. “And ye think that’d solve everythin’? The thought of her with someone else… it drives me mad.”
Malcolm’s grin faded as he studied his brother’s face, instantly grasping the depth of Aiden’s feelings. “Aiden,” he said quietly, “ye care more than ye want to admit.”
Aiden sighed heavily and ran a hand through his damp hair as he tried to find the right words. “Mayhap. But the thought of Katie… of her bein’ bound to someone else… it twists somethin’ inside me soul.”
Malcolm nodded slowly, the seriousness of the situation settling between them. “So what’s the real problem, then?”
Aiden’s face hardened again, his expression closing off. “The problem,” he muttered darkly, “is that I dinnae deserve her. And the fact that I want her as much as I do… it only makes things worse.”
Malcolm studied his brother-in-arms and sensed the burden Aiden carried, but he knew better than to push him further. The sun had nearly disappeared below the horizon, casting long shadows over the loch as the two men sat in silence, each lost in their shared past.
The ship’s timbers creaked and groaned under the relentless waves as Aiden stood at its bow, the salty sea spray stinging his face.
The wind whipped through his hair, carrying the acrid scent of brine and sweat.
The Caribbean sun beat down on the deck, turning the wooden planks beneath his feet into a searing griddle.
The Stormbreaker had been his home for nearly two years.
It was a floating hell he had learned to endure.
Aiden’s mind drifted back to when he had first earned the favor of Captain McTavish, a seasoned mariner with a scarred face and a heart as hard as the iron cannons that lined the ship’s deck.
The captain had recognized something in Aiden, a cold efficiency that made him invaluable during the brutal raids along the African coast.
Aiden had proven himself time and again, capturing slaves and dealing with them with a detachment that chilled even him. It was a dark stain on his soul, a memory that haunted him, especially now when he thought about how it had shaped the man he had become.
It was during those raids that Aiden met Malcolm.
The younger man had been hired as a deckhand, barely old enough to shave, but with a spirit that had not yet been broken by the sea.
Captain McTavish had ordered Aiden to train the boy, a task Aiden took on with reluctance.
He was quite aware that he was disliked by many of the crew.
He had risen through the ranks quickly, too quickly for some, and there were murmurs of resentment among the men.
Their first meeting had been far from friendly.
Malcolm had been nervous, green and eager to prove himself.
Aiden, cold and distant, had pushed him hard, harder than any of the others.
He saw too much foolishness and recklessness—an innocence that was better crushed quickly before the sea did it for him.
“Keep yer back straight!” Aiden had barked at him during one of their training sessions.
Malcolm had struggled to lift a barrel, and his face was flushed with exertion. “I’m tryin’, Aiden!” he had gritted out, his hands slipping on the rough wood.
“Try harder,” Aiden had snapped.
The friction between them had been palpable, but it had been nothing compared to the altercation that would cement their bond.
It had been a sweltering day, the air thick with humidity, and the crew had been on edge.
Crow, a grizzled old sailor with a reputation for brutality, had taken a dislike to Malcolm from the very beginning.
The boy’s fresh face and eager demeanor were like a red rag to a bull.
“Ye’re useless, boy,” Crow had sneered, shoving Malcolm against the mast. “Should’ve left ye on the docks where ye belong.”
“Leave him be, Crow,” Aiden had warned, stepping forward.
Crow had laughed in a low, menacing way. “Oh, the captain’s favorite wants to play protector, does he? Ye think ye’re better than us, do ye nae?”
Aiden’s jaw had clenched. “I said, leave him be. He’s me responsibility.”
Crow had spat on the deck, his eyes narrowing. “Then ye’ll take his punishment, aye?”
Before Aiden could react, Crow had lashed out, his fist connecting with Aiden’s jaw.
The force of the blow had sent Aiden staggering, but he had quickly regained his footing.
The crew had gathered around and formed a tight circle, their expressions a mix of anticipation and grim amusement.
Fights were not uncommon aboard the Stormbreaker, but this one felt different.
It was a test, a challenge to Aiden’s authority.
Malcolm had tried to intervene, but Aiden had shoved him back. “Stay out of this, Mal. This is me fight.”
The beating that followed was brutal. Crow was a seasoned fighter, and his fists were like iron.
Aiden had fought back, but the older man’s experience and raw power quickly overwhelmed him.
The sound of flesh hitting flesh, the dull thud of fists against ribs, and the goading jeers of the crew had filled the air.
Aiden had taken the blows without complaint, his mind focused on one thing only—protecting Malcolm at all costs.
When it was over, Aiden had been left battered and bruised, barely able to stand. Crow had spat on him again, this time in disgust, before turning away. The crew had dispersed, muttering among themselves, leaving Aiden and Malcolm alone.
Malcolm had rushed to his side, his face pale with shock and guilt. “Aiden, I’m so sorry… I didnae mean for this to happen…”
Aiden had waved him off, wincing as he straightened up. “’Tis nae yer fault, Mal. This is how it is on a ship like this. Ye learn to fight, or ye willnae last.”
The night had fully settled around the loch, and the sky had become a blanket of stars twinkling like distant fires.
The soft croak of frogs and the persistent hum of insects filled the air, creating a peaceful melody that dampened the chaotic thoughts swirling in Aiden’s mind.
He sat on the cool grass at the edge of the loch, still damp from his earlier swim, his gaze fixed on the rippling water.
Malcolm sat beside him, his flask now empty and resting between them like a silent witness to their shared burden.
For a long while, neither man spoke.
It was Malcolm who broke the silence, his voice low and reflective. “Ye ken, Aiden, we’ve been through hell and back. Faced things that would break most men. Did things that would haunt the best of them. But that’s nae who we are anymore. We’ve changed.”
Aiden stared out at the water, the reflection of the moon shimmering on its surface. “Have we?” he murmured, his voice tinged with bitterness. “Can we really say we’re different men when the ghosts of our past still haunt us? When those memories are still a part of who we are?”
Malcolm sighed, leaning back on his elbows and gazing up at the stars.
“Aye, those memories are a part of us, but they dinnae define us. What we did, what we had to do, was about survival. It was about livin’ through the worst, even if it meant losin’ a part of ourselves along the way.
But that doesnae mean we’re still those men.
We’re truly sorry for what we did. But we’ve also got to keep goin’. We’ve got to live.”
Aiden cursed under his breath, running a hand through his damp hair. “That’s exactly why I cannae marry, Malcolm. I cannae expose a good woman to the darkness inside me and the things I’ve done. Especially nae… especially nae someone I care about.”
Malcolm glanced at him sideways, a thoughtful expression on his face. “Ye mean Katie.”
Aiden didn’t respond immediately, the knot in his chest tightening at the sound of her name.
“’Tis nae just about her. I cannae be the man she deserves, nae with what I’m carryin’.
Nae with the secrets I’d have to keep. How can I build a life with someone when I cannae even tell them the truth about meself? ”
Malcolm considered this for a moment before replying. “I’m nay expert on marriage, Aiden, but I believe a marriage is built on trust and honesty. If ye truly care about her, then mayhap ye owe it to her—and to yerself, to be honest—to let her decide if she can accept ye, demons and all.”
Aiden groaned, weariness and guilt warring within him. The thought of being honest with Katie, of laying bare his past, filled him with dread. But Malcolm’s words lingered in his mind, a seed of doubt taking root.
“I dinnae ken,” Aiden muttered, getting to his feet. “I just dinnae ken.”
Malcolm stayed seated and looked at Aiden’s silhouette against the starlit loch. “Ye’ll figure it out, Aiden. Whatever ye decide, just ken that ye’re nae the man ye used to be. And ye’re nae alone in this.”
Aiden paused, looking back at his friend with gratitude and sorrow. “Good night, Mal,” he said softly before turning and heading back to the castle. “I have to try and avoid me future bride for the rest of me life.”