Chapter 33 #2
I flung myself away, turning my back as I hunched, trying to focus, trying to get him out of my mind.
“Stop!” I pleaded.
I know you’re lying to me, mariss, came his voice, whispered through the thick wall of disbelief.
He’d broken his promise.
He’d broken his promise!
He knew what this meant. He was willing to sacrifice Samryn for this? It didn’t make any sense. Unless…
Unless he thought that my feelings for him were strong enough that this could be forgiven.
Unless he thought that I cared for Samryn enough that I wouldn’t let him fall to the curse.
He knew that I didn’t want to see his Elthika suffer. So he was taking what he wanted…all while knowing I’d kneel to him anyway.
My chest twisted. Hurt speared me.
Had…had it all been a lie? I wondered. Had this been his intention all along? Had he suspected all along?
Suspected what, mariss? he questioned.
I closed my eyes, envisioning the blade in my mind as I’d done on the wildlands. He wanted my mind laid bare, but I surprised him.
I severed the connection, just as he likely knew I would.
“Get away from me,” I rasped, but it was me who rushed to the edge of the bathing pool, pulling myself out on trembling arms, still feeling the way his cock had filled me, a deep twinge at the sudden emptiness.
I didn’t bother to dry myself off. I dressed quickly, even though my hands shook, as hurt made me shiver.
“Think you can hide now?” came his guttural voice.
I heard the malice in his tone. When I turned, I saw him stepping from the pool.
Dripping wet, still naked—and hard, as he rounded on me.
I swallowed, hearing my rough breaths as he backed me up.
Until I was pressed against the wall of the washroom, the stone hard and unyielding against my back.
“What are you hiding?” he growled, lowering his head until our eyes were level. “Tell me, Amaia. This isn’t a fucking game.”
I turned my face, but he captured my chin. “Let me go,” I hissed.
“Tell me right now. Did you come here with a purpose? Did the Dothikkar give you orders? Are you under his command as well? Was everything you told me a lie?”
My eyes widened, but the anger rose in place of my hurt. “Of course not.”
“But you’ve been lying about so much,” he said in disgust, his voice twisting. “I thought you were different. I thought I could believe you. But now I’m forced to go over every single word you’ve ever said to me, to try to differentiate what was real and what wasn’t.”
I pushed at his chest. I was shaking. “Let me go!”
“What was the strategy, exactly?” he continued, as if I hadn’t even spoken. “Was it planned? Your place in my bed? Did you plan it with your Dothikkar? With Ryak? Nevin? Did you promise to spread your legs for a Karath, to get his secrets?”
I felt like he’d slapped me across the face. “How dare you.”
He laughed, bitter and dark. “How dare I?” He shook his head. He glared, cold as steel in winter. “The fucking audacity for you to say that to me.”
“You used your magic against me,” I hissed. “The one thing I asked of you. You…”
His expression was edged in icy mockery. “I…what? Betrayed you, Amaia?”
Tears swam in my vision.
“Now you know how it feels. You’re just like her, thinking you can have whatever you want, thinking you can use me for your gain,” he growled. He meant Kamora. Despair cut deep, mingling with my anger. “Tell me what you were sent here to do!”
“Or you’ll what?” I hissed, mad enough to poke at him.
Hurt enough to want to burn it all down between us.
Fuck it. Nothing he could threaten me with scared me more than the Dothikkar’s threats against my own family.
“I didn’t ask to be here. I didn’t seduce my way into your bed.
You brought me here. You asked for my help. You broke the promise you made.”
His expression was thunderous.
“So fuck you, Alaryk,” I said softly, enunciating each word as tears dripped down my cheeks. “I trusted you.”
“And I trusted you not to fuck me for your king,” he said, the words clipped, as bitter as ice. A shuddered, shocked breath escaped me, a pitiful little sound dying in my throat.
“You…you think I’m a whore,” I rasped. “Is that what you’re saying?”
His head tilted back slightly, peering at me with narrowed eyes. The cool glare told me exactly what he thought of me. That gutted me, that he would think me capable of something like that. As if I was this scheming, manipulative person.
In a low tone, he said, “You’re no better than Kamora. At least she was always honest about what she wanted from me.”
Something in me broke. And I thought he might’ve seen it splinter in my eyes because his grip on me loosened, his pupils dilating as his eyes flicked between my own.
I pushed past him, dripping wet and shivering in my clothes—my tunic I might have put on backward, my laces undone on my trews.
“You’re not going anywhere,” he growled.
I didn’t reply. I didn’t even put on my boots. I pulled open the front door, a breeze whistling inside, before closing it behind me. I ran down the steps, shock mingling with my own sense of guilt.
I heard him throw back the door, coming after me.
“Amaia, get back here,” he called.
Over my shoulder, I saw he was still naked, standing at the bottom of his dwelling as his cold gaze tracked me.
“We’re not done,” he said.
“No,” I said. “I don’t want you near me again.”
Frustration laced itself into his sharp exhale. “Amaia—”
“Leave me alone!”
Then I was running toward the hatchery, the glow of the dome of the incubation room a welcome reprieve in the cold darkness of the night.
I could feel his eyes on me until I reached the hatchery door. When I slipped inside, I crumbled onto the floor. It was there that Syris found me, likely having heard a noise and coming to investigate.
“Amaia?” she breathed. “What’s happened?”
“N-Nothing,” I said, though it was obvious that it was a lie. Another lie…among many. Alaryk wasn’t the only villain here.
And I couldn’t quite meet Syris’s gaze when I said, “I’d like to sleep here again.”
“Of course,” she said quietly, her voice tranquil and hushed. I liked that about her. She was calm in the face of uncertainty.
Moak was a fool for seeing past her all this time.
“Come on,” Syris said, helping me up. “Your quarters are just as you left them.”