Chapter Sixteen
J oanna lay in the middle of the huge four poster bed of dark cherrywood, the fireplace roaring to her right, the closed door to Marcus’s dressing room on the left. To try to relax, she glanced around the spacious room, part of her suite of rooms, that boasted a sitting area with a chair and a chaise longue before the fire, a screen painted with a Chinese scene in black and red in the corner hiding the washstand and close stool, another closed door that was her dressing room, and tried to stop trembling. Oh, she was ecstatically happy to be married to Marcus and wanted to be with him as a wife was to her husband. Once they got through this…part of being married for the first time, she’d stop being nervous.
Utterly angry at herself for having such traitorous feelings, Joanna tried for the twentieth time to persuade herself that what was about to happen was a perfectly normal result of two people loving one another and wanting to share themselves…all of themselves…with each other. It seemed disloyal to Marcus for her to have such trepidations about tonight, as though she didn’t trust him to take care of her as he had from the very beginning. As he had with their dance back in May where he could have made a scene with Geoffrey but didn’t. Or when he rescued her from the bevy of suitors who were pressing her too sharply at the lodge. Or when he insisted on teaching her to shoot, which had in fact possibly saved her from assault at the hands of Bartlow. Marcus had been there, taking care of her at every turn. She needn’t worry that he would do the same here in this bed tonight.
Still, she was scared. She might hate herself for it, but she was honest enough to admit it. To herself, at least. Admitting it to Marcus might not be possible. It seemed like such a betrayal of the good, kind man she knew him to be. So she would put on a brave face and do what must be done. She’d worn her new night rail, made especially for her wedding night, with Cluny lace at the high neck and long sleeve edges. For all its seeming modesty, the garment was shockingly sheer—you could see her dark nipples distinctly through the thin fabric. Joanna had thought that might be something Marcus would enjoy, not taking into consideration that she now would feel almost nude wearing it.
The door of the dressing room opened and Joanna swallowed convulsively as Marcus emerged, covered from neck to knees in a dark-blue banyan with a subtle swirling pattern to it. A very decent garment that would shock no one. What on earth would he think when he saw her nightgown?
“Good evening, sweetheart.” He sent a gentle smile her way, then headed to the writing desk tucked into a corner and poured two glasses of wine. “I almost told Richards to bring champagne so we could celebrate properly.” Marcus glanced over his shoulder at her. “But I know you enjoyed this vintage when we were in Scotland, so I took care to stock a good many bottles of it.” Turning to her he smiled, then came toward her with the glass outstretched. “I thought something familiar in an unfamiliar place might be soothing to you.”
The utter kindness and thoughtfulness of the gesture made Joanna’s breathing slow and she relaxed for the first time since she climbed into the bed. Marcus knew exactly what to do to put her at ease in the most awkward situation of her life. She accepted the glass and raised it toward him. “To our most perfect union, my love. May it last forever.”
Smiling broadly, his gaze tender, Marcus raised his glass and touched it to hers, the ring of the two vessels a joyous sound.
Joanna sipped her wine, relishing the familiar vintage. They drank in silence until her glass was almost empty. She halted, not quite a full sip left and handed it back to him. The last thing she wished was to be foxed on her wedding night.
He set both glasses on the nightstand, then sat on the bed beside her and took her hands.
Joanna’s heart sped up until she feared he could hear the pounding, but she met his eyes evenly.
Without a word, Marcus leaned forward and kissed her, seizing her lips with such raw passion that her toes curled underneath the covers. They had kissed before this, of course, but the urgency as his tongue thrust into her mouth and plundered here and there with absolute abandon was new, heady, and when he broke the kiss, left her wanting more.
“Being you, Joanna, I’m certain you already know what takes place between a husband and wife in their bed.” His gaze never left her face and though her cheeks heated, she nodded.
“I do.” Her mother had made vague statements that only confused her, so after days of wheedling, she’d finally gotten Diana to explain it to her—in enough detail that she was both appalled and curious at the same time.
Grinning, Marcus rubbed her knuckles softly with his thumb. “Good. And I believe you know me well enough to realize I am a patient man.”
“Any more patient and I’d have had to step in with a drastic way to persuade Geoffrey to let us wed.” Her mouth pursed in a playful pout.
“I say this to assure you that if you become frightened by anything we do, or dislike it, you only have to tell me and we will stop, try another way at another time.” His voice was tender as he lifted her hand to kiss the back of it. The touch of his lips to her skin sent a shiver down her back. A good sensation. “I must warn you, however, that there is a point of no return.” Marcus’s eyes met hers and she couldn’t look away. “A point at which I fear I will not be able to restrain myself from completing the act. So if you have any doubts, you must voice them—”
She put a finger to his lips, stopping his words. “I don’t have any doubts. Not with you, Marcus.”
His smile broadened, then he kissed her finger and grasped it. “Then by all means, let us begin. May I join you under the covers?”
She nodded and watched, heart in her throat, as he slid the banyan off his shoulders, revealing his chest, thick with dark hairs, and his stomach where the raw scar from the knife was still freshly pink. As Joanna had tended him for days as a nurse, she’d seen this part of his body many times. The part of him lower than his stomach, however, was undiscovered country and her curious gaze refused to remain above his waist. Even though she had an idea what the male member looked like, thanks to Diana’s frank conversation, she wasn’t quite prepared for that very large, stiffly protruding part of Marcus she caught sight of as he quickly slid under the covers next to her.
“Do not be alarmed, my love.” He slipped over right beside her, pressing his body to hers. “We can go slowly.”
Heat poured off him, warming her immediately and making her long to remove her nightgown so they could lie skin to skin. But he hadn’t seen her in it yet and it had been made especially for him. Well, she could remedy that. Joanna sat up and turned, thrusting her chest out toward him. “Do you want me to take my gown off slowly, then?”
His eyes flashed, a hunger in them she’d glimpsed before that now roared to life. “Yes, please.” He propped himself up on his side, one hand under his head, not taking his eyes off her.
Not sure which way the garment should go, up and over, or down over her shoulders, Joanna opted for over her shoulders as being the slower path to disrobement. She unbuttoned the befrilled placket and the gown flopped open. Marcus sucked in a breath, his gaze pinned to her chest. Beginning to enjoy teasing him, Joanna pushed the lacy fabric first off her right shoulder, then off her left, being careful to keep the material clutched in her hand, not showing him anything much yet. Carefully, she lowered the garment even more, until she might be thought to wear a low-cut evening gown, the edging of lace riding just above her nipples.
The overwhelming approval in her husband’s face emboldened Joanna, so she positioned the gown exactly so, then pulled the sheer fabric taut across her breasts.
Marcus groaned, then sprang up in the bed. “Allow me to help you, my dear.” He grasped the open collar of the gown and with one swift motion, the sound of ripping fabric filled the chamber. Joanna sat, mouth open, as her gown fell onto the mattress in pieces, her breasts now completely free, her nipples hardening in the cool air.
Grinning, Marcus leaned toward her and engulfed the nearest furled tip with his mouth.
Joanna gasped, then moaned as his tongue licked the sensitive tip, laving it with gentle strokes that made every hair stand up on her body. Slowly, he pressed her to lie back, until she lay on the mattress, the tatters of her gown around her. He slid his hand up to cup the other breast, tweaking that tip and rolling it between his fingers until her entire body throbbed. Then he switched, his mouth now pressed to her left breast, his hand stroking the right.
A moan of pleasure slipped from her mouth, surprising Joanna and eliciting a like response from Marcus. “Do you like that, sweetheart?”
“Oh, yes.” Joanna slipped her arms around his neck. “This is the most wonderful I’ve ever felt.”
“Can I show you more?” He stared into her eyes, his own jet black and eager.
“Yes, please.” She didn’t know what he planned to do, but if it was better than this, she wouldn’t say no.
“Good. Just stay as you are and tell me if you wish me to stop.”
“I can’t imagine wanting that.”
Marcus set his lips to her breast once more, kissed the nipple, then slid his mouth down across her stomach, dropping kisses and he strayed lower. When he reached her navel, he dipped his tongue into the small crevice, and she shivered with delight. Everything he did to her made her feel loved and cherished. And filled with an energy that buzzed throughout her body, though it had begun to settle down low in her stomach, the place where Marcus had just kissed her.
Restlessly, she stretched her legs out as Marcus shifted lower in the bed, his mouth now almost to the place where—
Gasping, Joanna raised her head up, seeing only his dark hair poised overtop the place where her legs were parted slightly. “Marcus?”
He raised his head immediately, his gaze going straight to her face. “You wish me to stop? I will,” he said, his voice quiet and tender, “even though if we continue, you will experience one of the deepest pleasures a man can give a woman.”
Who would want to relinquish such a chance? Especially with Marcus? Despite her misgivings, she swallowed hard and said, “No, please don’t stop.” She laid her head back and closed her eyes, willing herself to simply relax and allow her husband to take care of her.
His lips returned to the intimate place just above her curls, moved into them, and searched until he found a sensitive place, a little nub that when he touched it with his tongue her hips bucked as of their own accord and she gasped loudly at the strange sensation that shot through her body. Her face seemed on fire, but she couldn’t think about being embarrassed while Marcus plied his tongue again to that spot, making her quiver and starting an ache deep inside her somewhere. That ache seemed to intensify, to spiral upward with every stroke he made until without warning, the ache exploded within her. Joanna clutched the covers and cried out as wave upon wave of indescribable pleasure cascaded through her shaking body.
Marcus continued to massage her, his lips and tongue swirling around the nub, each touch eliciting another burst of pleasure until at last he stopped and she stilled, panting as her sated body relaxed into the mattress. He snaked his way upwards until he lay beside her, then he gathered her to his chest, his warmth soothing as her frantic heartbeat slowed.
“Oh, Marcus. That was so…” Joanna didn’t have words for what had just happened, what she’d felt inside.
“Satisfying?” he whispered in her ear.
“Absolutely.” She draped an arm over his chest, wanting to be as close to him as was humanly possible.
“There is more, you know.”
She did know. Diana had made certain she did.
Joanna nodded. “Is it as good as this was?”
“Infinitely better, love.” He kissed the top of her head. “The best there could ever be.” He sighed. “But as with anything that is worth the game, there is a price to pay for it.”
Shifting so she could look at him, Joanna pursed her lips. “And in this unfair world, it is the woman who pays the greater price, I believe.”
Marcus chuckled but nodded. “It’s not fair, I agree. However, you only pay it once, and the sting isn’t great, so I’m told.”
“Who told you that?”
“I’m afraid that is privileged information, my love.” He eased her back onto the bed. “I am not a man who kisses and tells.”
“I didn’t think we were speaking of kisses.” Joanna stared up at him, trying to summon a look of reproach, although she didn’t really feel reproachful. Men were not expected to come to their wedding beds virgins. And truth to tell, she was rather glad Marcus wasn’t. One of them needed to know what they were doing. Based on what had just transpired, her husband certainly did.
“We aren’t.” He levered himself over top of her. “But I don’t do other things and tell either. So rest assured, my love, our time spent in this bed stays in this bed as far as I’m concerned. Now, tell me, wife,” he paused as if savoring the word, “do you wish me to continue?” He peered into her eyes, as if trying to find the words there. “If you don’t, then we can cuddle here until we fall asleep.”
The words were bravely spoken, and Joanna knew he meant them. If she cried off, he would hold her until they fell asleep and no reprimand would ever pass his lips. But the idea wasn’t appealing to her in the least. Not after what he’d made her feel just now. And because she wanted more than anything in the world to be as one with him. “Cuddling may be good enough for some, but when have you ever known me to take the easier path?” She reached up to stroke his cheek. “You have already taught me so much, but I want you to teach me more.”
His eyes grew darker and he swooped down to kiss her, invading her mouth with an intensity that thrilled her. “You are without doubt the perfect woman.”
Warmed by his praise, Joanna relaxed into the mattress. “Tell me what I should do.”
“Bend your knees and open them outward.” When she’d done so, Marcus shifted himself so he knelt between her legs. Leaning forward, he filled his hands with her breasts, cupping them, kneading them, stroking the nipples until they had furled tightly once more.
His touch had Joanna moaning in the back of her throat, pressing her breasts into his grasp. Desperate to feel even more of him, she slid her hands up and down his arms, though that wasn’t enough. His head came down, his mouth fastening on her nipple, she ran her hands through his dark hair, delighted by the silky feel of it. When he drew it into his mouth, she moaned and pressed him closer.
Suddenly his hand brushed at her entrance, one finger skimming her opening, then swirling upward to the sensitive nub. She shuddered, moaning his name as that wonderful ache began again deep within her.
“Almost there, my love.” He shifted his big body and something hard and hot pressed against her opening—and pushed forward quickly.
A flicker of sharp pain made her gasp, then he filled her, flowing past that burning sensation until he was seated deep inside her. That hadn’t been nearly as bad as she’d feared, though it did feel strange. Joanna glanced up at Marcus, about to ask him what she should do now, but his eyes were closed, his face contorted in what looked like pain. Concerned, she grasped his arm. “Marcus? Are you alright?”
Several moments of silence alarmed her greatly, then at last he opened his eyes, his breath coming in ragged gasps. “Yes, I’m fine. I had to wait so I wouldn’t spill myself too soon.”
“I don’t understand.” Though relieved, Joanna was still bewildered by his actions.
“I’ll explain…later.” He peered down at her, a concerned frown marring his handsome face. “But I should be asking you…did it hurt very much?”
“No, I’m happy to say.”
“Excellent.” That look of concentration was back. “Then we can continue.” Slowly, he pulled himself backward until she was afraid he would leave her completely. Strange as this all felt, she didn’t want that in the least. Then he was thrusting back into her, and the sensation was extraordinary.
“Oh, Marcus.” The ebb and flow of his motions drove the ache in her belly to that upward spiral from before, although much more quickly, more intensely. The faster he went, the tighter she seemed to wind and wind until the tightness exploded again, more strongly than before as her body grasped his, over and over, the waves of pleasure so great she cried out, “Marcus! Oh, Marcus,” with each one.
Even as she called to him, he thrust deeply again and moaned, “Joanna” as liquid heat erupted within her. Joanna scarcely noticed, she was so preoccupied with wrapping her arms around her husband, clutching him to her as her body slowly released its grip on him.
He slumped on top of her, pressing her into the mattress for a moment. Then, with what seemed a great effort, he rolled to the side and lay on his back, one arm flung over his face, panting loudly.
Smiling broadly, she turned to watch him, amazed and awed by what they’d just done. She waited expectantly until at last his head rolled toward her, his eyes trying their best to focus on her. With a suddenness that startled her, he grabbed her and pulled her to him, burying his face in her neck. “Joanna, oh, God.” He raised his head, his body trembling. “Never have I experienced such joy, such pleasure as you have just given me.” His eyes searched hers insistently. “Please tell me that I have given you some of the same.”
“You have never given me anything but joy, my love.” She pulled his head to her and kissed him with all the strength and passion that he’d awakened in her. “And now you’ve gifted me with a world of pleasure I’d never have found with anyone else.” Joanna laid her head back on his chest, loathe to be parted from him for even a moment. “We were Fated to be together, Marcus. No matter what anyone else has said or done to keep us apart, we were simply meant to be with each other.”
“You’ll get no argument from me there, sweetheart.” He pulled the covers up over them and engulfed her in his arms, holding her possessively, which she quite delighted in. “I knew from the moment I saw you I would love no one else, in this world or any other to come.”
“I may not have loved you at first sight, but very soon after you rescued me from my unwanted suitors, I believe I was smitten.” Joanna skimmed her hand down his side, reveling in the feel of him. All the way down to his hip…and then a bit lower until she encountered that part of him that had been so hard not long ago. Now it was much softer. Her hand strayed onto it and it stirred agreeably.
“Joanna?”
She glanced up to find Marcus’s dark eyes trained on hers. “Yes?”
“Are you perhaps wanting to ask a question that you don’t know how to phrase?” He grasped her hand and wrapped it around his…member. She recalled that was what her sister-in-law had called it.
“What question might that be?” Slowly, he guided her fingers to stroke his miraculously stiffening flesh.
“Will you make love to me again, Marcus?” He released her hand, and she continued to fondle him, until his member was jutting out straight and proud.
Joanna gave it a gentle squeeze and suddenly she was on her back, Marcus over top of her, gazing into her eyes intently. She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Will you make love to me again, please, Marcus?”
“All you ever need to do is ask, my love. I am yours to command.” He swept her legs open and plunged into her—now the feeling of coming home.
“Then I will command you to do this every night for as long as we both shall live.” She’d want every night with Marcus to last as long as the midwinter solstice.
“Don’t forget the days.” He nuzzled her breast.
They could do this during the daylight hours as well? “Then we will never get out of this bed.”
Marcus chuckled and kissed her lips. “And that suits me just fine.”