15 - Shep
M y mind is spinning with all kinds of scenarios as I make my way back into the kennel. And even though my heart kind of jumped when I saw her—and it wasn’t totally from shock—this is not good.
Whatever she’s up to, it’s not good.
And it kinda pisses me off. But also, I think I’m the one to blame.
I guess she really is Collin’s sister. Fine. That could be the reason she’s here. But that’s not the only reason. If it was, why now? Why didn’t she come here first? Why open that weird bar in the middle of the woods?
That place was a honeypot. It was CORE through and through. And they’re not here for me—the only reason they’re here is Collin.
And now this is all gonna come back on me.
I’m so pissed.
Because even though I didn’t lead her here—hell, I didn’t do anything with that girl except talk to her a couple of times—this is all gonna be blamed on me.
And I just got accepted into the group. For the first time in years, I’ve got a place to belong. I’ve got people, and a place to live, and a purpose. And none of that has anything to do with me being a spy.
But that’s what he’s gonna think. That’s what Collin’s gonna think if he finds out Olive is CORE and that she and I already know each other.
If, Shep? If? There’s no if. She’s here to tell him who I am.
And that’s it for me. I’ll be alone again. And it’s all her fault.
I walk through the kennel, fuming, but don’t go to the puppy. Instead, I go into the feed room and stare at the whiteboard where bossy Cross left me a list of instructions. Which… kinda makes me smile.
But also ignites the anger again, because I like this kid. I like his puppy. I’m looking forward to training that little maniac to bite people on command. This sounds fun to me.
I like this life, brand new as it is. It feels like a real second chance and I don’t want this girl fucking it up.
The main door of the kennel opens, then slams closed, being on a tight spring to keep dogs in. It’s probably Amon wondering where I am. Not that I really have a schedule yet, but Cross has left for school and the puppy’s training is now my responsibility, so I put Olive behind me and step out into the hallway.
But it’s not Amon, so my words come out in a growl. “What the hell are you doing, Olive? Why are you here?”
She looks taken aback for a moment, like she wasn’t expecting my anger. Which is such a lie. She is such a lie. Because this reaction only lasts for a split second. In the next moment, she’s spitting words at me. “What does that mean, what am I doing? Collin is my brother. I told you that. You’re just mad because you didn’t believe me and now you look like a fool.”
“A fool?” I laugh. “Well, I’d rather be a fool than a fuckin’ liar and that’s what you are.”
“And yet here I am in my brother’s super-secret, black-ops, ex-military compound. How can both of these things be true, if I’m a liar?”
“Because you work for CORE.”
“So do you.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I used to. They kicked me out.”
“They kicked you out ? Do you even hear yourself? Please. They kicked you out.” She scoffs. “They didn’t kick you out, Shep .” She sneers my name. “They let you go. And then …” She shrugs. “Somehow… by luck, I’m sure, you ended up here at Edge Security. A super-secret, black-ops, ex-military security business run by the infamous Collin Creed. Yeah,” she laughs. “That’s likely.”
“Believe what you want. I was in prison. CORE was not coming to save me.”
“Wow.” She cocks a hip and leans against the wall. “You’re just… dumb, or something.”
“Right.”
“Well, you’re not sittin’ in prison right now. So… how’s that happen if CORE didn’t get you out?”
“Charlie Beaufort did.”
“Charlie Beaufort is as CORE as they come, Shep. He’s a two-faced piece of shit. The only reason the US military complex still uses him is because he can get the job done. All he wants is money and power and he doesn’t care one bit where those two things come from. So you’re either lying to me”—she narrows her eyes down until they’re almost slits—“or you’re lying to yourself. Which one is it?”
“Well, first of all,” I say, holding up a finger, “you have no right to ask me questions. I didn’t show up at your work trying to fuck things up. And second of all,”—I hold up another finger—“I don’t owe you answers.”
“Hmmm.” She kicks off the wall and walks forward, her fingertips gently brushing against my arm as she pushes past me, going into the feed room. A chill runs through my body from that small touch, but I shake it off, turning to watch her.
She’s standing in front of the whiteboard, reading the instructions Cross left for me. “We discussed this, you know.”
“Discussed what? And with who?”
She looks over her shoulder at me, just staring into my eyes. It’s a technique to make people uncomfortable and gain control of things when a situation might be spiraling. I should know, I was taught to do the same thing. “Discussed you and how you got here.”
“You didn’t answer the second part of my question.”
She smiles. “I guess the childish thing to say would be that I don’t owe you answers. But I’m a grown-up.” This makes me laugh. She’s a baby. But she just keeps talking. “So I’m gonna tell you. My partner, Brose. When you came in to the club that first time he and I had a nice long conversation about you. And do you know what we decided?”
“I can’t wait to find out.”
“That it’s the second one, Shep.”
“Second what ?” I’m very annoyed now.
“You’re lying to yourself.”
I take in a deep breath and let it out. “Whatever.” Then I turn towards the open door, ready to go grab the puppy and leave her here with her stupid riddles.
“It’s not your fault.”
I don’t even turn my head to look at her as I try to pass, but she grabs my arm, forcing me to react. If she was a guy, this would be my cue to punch her in the jaw. But she’s not, so instead I make the most menacing face and growl my words out. “Let go of me and don’t ever fucking touch me again.”
She does not let go. She looks me right in the eyes. “They’re using you.”
“Look, if you’re gonna try and play mind games with me, the least you can do is tell me something I don’t know. Of course they’re using me. Just like they’re using you. Because they use everyone, Olive. But I, unlike you, have seen the truth here. That we are just puppets. And I’d rather spend my life in prison than work for CORE again.”
She goes to open her mouth, but I put up a hand. “Save it, OK? I know who got me out of prison. I know why they did it. I’m not fuckin’ stupid. But no one gave me marching orders, so as far as I’m concerned, this is a brand-new start for me. And even if they did try and give me orders, I’m not interested. If they want to kill me because I won’t participate, then fuck it. There’s nothing I can do to stop it.” I reach up with my opposite hand and pry her fingers off my arm. “So if you don’t mind, I’m gonna take my chances and you can just see yourself the fuck out and pretend you don’t know me.”
But again, as I pass, she reaches for me, grabbing onto my arm.
This time I don’t control myself. Can’t control myself. So my hand is around her neck and I have her pressed against the whiteboard before she can even blink.
I can feel her heartbeat beneath my fingertips and I’d be lying if I said that tiny pulse of blood wasn’t turning me on. I lean into her face. My turn to look her in the eyes. “One little squeeze, Olive, and you’d be seeing black. Just a bit more pressure for just a few more seconds, and you’d be on the fuckin’ floor.”
Her eyes are low and lazy as she looks back at me. “Go ahead. Do it.”
Before I can stop myself, my fingers squeeze, wrapping tight around her neck. I expect her to struggle. To push me off and give me a reason to stop.
But she doesn’t.
She moans.
And instantly, I’m fuckin’ hard.
“Do it,” she says, her voice barely a whisper. “Do it. Please .”
“You’re sick,” I whisper back. “You’re damaged.”
“ Do it !” This time, she says it through clenched teeth. “ Do . It .” Then she brings her hand up to cover mine, and she squeezes for me.
I pull back, breathing hard, but not as hard as her, trying to get myself under control. “What the fuck was that?”
She exhales, still panting, looks down at her feet, then tips her eyes up to me in what comes off as a very menacing expression. She smiles, and it’s wrong. “So what? I like it. Brose does it all the time.”
“What?”
She’s whispering. “My handler. He’s…” She turns, facing the wall to her left. “He’s possessive and expects full submission.”
“Wow. They really did a number on you, didn’t they?”
She scoffs, her voice normal again. “Look who’s talking. You’re here and you actually think it’s a second chance. They’ve got a hold of your mind, Shep. You’re a puppet.”
“Bitch, you just told me that your handler chokes you out as part of your compliance protocol. I threatened you, and all it did was get your panties wet. So let’s definitely have that conversation about who’s a puppet and who’s not.”
Her smile is smarmy now. I’m concentrating on that because she’s actually really pretty when she’s all worked up like this, and the next thing I know, she’s got her hand between my legs. “OK. Let’s see who’s the puppet, Shep.”
“Don’t start something you can’t finish.”
Her fingers dig into my jeans, squeezing me. And I’ve been hard this whole time, so all it feels is… good .
Then next thing I know, I’ve got her pressed up against the wall, my hand back on her throat, and we’re kissing. Sloppy, open-mouth fucking kissing. I’m pressing against her neck and she’s grinding on me like she’s about to come any second now. And her fingertips are pulling my shirt up, tantalizingly flitting against my stomach as she tries to work the button on my jeans and?—
The door slams closed out in the hallway and she and I break apart.
But not before Amon fucking Parrish enters the feed room.
He looks at her.
He looks at me.
He looks back at her. “What the fuck is going on here?”
Olive smiles. “Uh… Amon, right?”
“Don’t play games with me, Olive. I’m in a bad mood.”
She smiles bigger, then shrugs a shoulder, nodding her head towards me. “He’s…” She looks down at my hard-on, which makes Amon look down at my hard-on, and then she says, in a sugar-sweet voice, “Fun. And I’m a grown-up, so… maybe you should just mind your own fuckin’ business?”
I swear to God, Amon almost loses his shit. I watch in real time as he struggles to hold it in, growling back at her in a dangerously low voice that was honed to terrorize. “Get the fuck out of my kennel, Olive. Right now .”
She squints her eyes at him. And for a moment, I don’t think she’s gonna go. But when I glance at Amon, she and I see the same thing.
Malice.
We see a man who has killed many people.
Olive sucks in a breath, gives me a final look, then squares her shoulders and pushes past him. “I’ll see you later, Shep. We can finish our conversation then.”
The door slams closed one more time, and she’s gone.
Amon turns to me. “What the fuck are you doing? Do you have any idea who that is?”
“Oh, trust me,” I say. “I know exactly who she is.”
Amon’s eyes go narrow. “Do you… do you know each other?”
“Know each other? No. But we’ve met.”
Amon lowers his voice to almost a whisper. “Did you fuck Collin’s baby sister?”
“Not yet.” And then, even though I know what’s coming, I laugh. And it’s still coming out when I’m hitting the floor.
Amon turns, shaking his hand, his knuckles all bloody. “Pack your shit and get out.”
“No,” I say, getting up and spitting out the blood. “No. I’m not packing my shit. She came on to me . She’s the one you should be pissed off at. So no, Amon. I’ve got a contract and I’m not packing my shit just because Collin’s little sister likes…” I almost say it. I mean, I’m very fucking close to saying what that girl likes. But it’s a touch too far, so I don’t.
“Likes what ?” Amon prods.
“Me. That’s what. It’s not my fault she likes me . And I didn’t know who she was when we met. It was in some bar.” I don’t add that she was whoring herself out because I figure that’s really not my story to tell. “I didn’t know who she was until last weekend. And I thought she was lying until I saw her walking down the damn driveway this morning. I came in here to work and she followed me. The next thing I know, she’s grabbing my dick, OK? And… yeah. I let her. That’s it. That’s what happened. So fuck you. It really is none of your business.”
Then I leave, spitting out some more blood on the concrete floor as I grab my puppy from his kennel and take him outside to work.