Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
MERI
M y dreams are dark, full of monsters and death. Lorn is front and center, along with Leandra and Cormal. They hound me until sleep becomes elusive. For the first time in a long time, I wake alone, hours before the sun. Neither Cormal nor Madoc returned last night. Arden and her men were gone as well on a mission for The Abbey.
As queen, I wasn’t sure if I’d like having tons of people around me, but I loved it. Too many years spent by myself, longing for family or a friend to stay with me. Sometimes the loneliness became so unbearable, I’d often find myself getting up in the middle of the night to wander the streets of whatever place we were calling home.
The light Fae palace always had aristocratic Fae wandering the halls and servants bustling here and there, producing a constant hum of noise beneath even the smallest amount of silence.
In contrast, The Abbey is a sentinel, standing silent and watchful, filled with magic, and ready to guard its inhabitants. It’s too quiet here. Living with Leandra felt like this. Suffocating and lonely. Dark and dangerous. When I stayed here previously, I didn’t know anything different. Plus, the warmth of protection and my newfound family distracted me. Now I do.
Cormal strides into the room with a firm expression on his face. Seeing me sitting alone eases the raging storm inside him and the crackling tension he brought with him subsides. “Good morning. You’re up early.” His lips capture mine.
Normally, his kisses are demanding and full of desire, but the way his lips cling to mine suggests a different type of need.
“Are you okay? Did something happen?”
He looks at me blankly. “No, why?”
Instead of answering, I hand him a cup of coffee, but he shakes his head.
“It took me all night to get through everything. More coffee and I’ll be bouncing off the walls,” he tells me. “Where’s Madoc?”
Maybe his mood is due to his underlying jealousy. “He’s not back yet. I spent last night alone.” Although I try, I can’t quite keep the grumbling note of irritation out of my voice.
His blue eyes sweep across my face. “Bad dreams?”
“Plenty, but I expected them,” I tell him as I try to find a way to explain how I’m feeling. I don’t want to be a burden to him. The Abbey is the safest place for me. “I’m out of sorts here. Like I don’t belong. I wish we could go home.”
He grabs a piece of bacon off the plate in front of me and tugs me from the small table to the couch. “Where is home?” His look is contemplative as he waits for my answer.
“The Underworld, I guess,” I reply, but even as I say it, I realize it’s only partially true. “I don’t know. Being with the Fae filled some part of me I didn’t know was empty. It’s going to take a while to figure out where I belong. Being here doesn’t help because it’s a place of limbo. Temporary.”
Strong arms wrap around my body and pull me close. “I understand. Once we’ve taken care of Leandra, maybe we can find a place in the Fae world. Hell knows I have enough wealth to do whatever we want.”
With his scent and strength wrapped around me, my world settles. I tilt my head back and look up at him. “I like that idea. Did you get us some clothes? The sooner we hunt her down, the better.”
He nods, then abruptly turns toward the door.
Madoc strides in with a somber expression on his face. “Rivan’s missing. With Fisk dead, the Kraken, Hyne, is leading the Water Fae. He said Rivan dropped off the treaty but couldn’t stay because he was returning to you. Did you tell him you were giving up the crown and coming here?”
The words crash into me, and my heart sinks like a stone. I never thought he would actually return to me. His mind was set on leaving the Fae world behind. “I didn’t tell him my plans. I thought he would feel obligated to stay, and I didn’t want that for him.” The last time I saw him was in my room at the palace, swearing to find Camon.
“He swore to hunt down Camon and make him pay for selling out Fisk,” Cormal says, jumping up. “We took out Camon.” He looks pointedly at Madoc, who severed Camon’s head from his body and burned him to ashes with faery fire. “Once Rivan found out about his demise, he likely went after his father.”
Dread curls in my stomach, and I get to my feet, needing to stand before I throw up. “Brixton is more likely to kill him than welcome him.” Two days have passed… he could have already done it. I shove the thought away. I would know if Rivan was dead. I’d feel it. I don’t know how, but I’d know. Right? “We need to find Rivan immediately.”
Cormal’s blue eyes reflect the same fears as mine. We both know it might be too late. “I’ll get my men on it. Someone always knows something. We’ll find him. I promise you.” His jaw tightens until he’s wearing his usual expression of determination. Sheer will is his greatest power.
Madoc steps over to me and adds his own assurances. Grey eyes peer at me from beneath long dark lashes. They should be cold, but all I see is warmth in them. “There isn’t an area in the Fae lands I don’t know. I’ll check the places the Phoenix like to hide first.” He turns to Cormal. “How do you want me to send word?”
Cormal conjures a phone for him. “Call me. My number is programmed in there.”
Madoc stares at the equipment likes it’s a snake waiting to bite him. His eyes dart to mine, and a slight pink hue spreads across his cheeks. “I don’t know how to use it. Is there another way?”
He’s embarrassed, but he shouldn’t be. I didn’t have a phone until Cormal gave one to me.
Cormal’s gaze sharpens. “Take it. If you need me, press this button.” He points to the one labeled contacts. “Then tap on my name. I’m the only one in there.” With a couple of taps, he shows him. Cormal’s phone rings, and Madoc immediately jumps, then scowls at a smirking Cormal.
“Does it work in the Fae lands?” he asks, reluctantly taking the phone from him.
“Not always,” Cormal replies with a sigh. “Here.” He hands him a card. “Say the spell on the back. I’ll find you, but it will take longer.”
Madoc slides the card into his pocket. “Thanks.” The grudging tone of his voice tells me he isn’t happy having to rely on Cormal.
I grab the phone from Madoc. “Here. I’m adding my number too. In case you can’t reach Cormal.” Or you don’t want to call him , but I don’t say it. I look over at Cormal, who’s now glaring at me.
“Don’t call her,” he orders Madoc. “She’s safe here. If she leaves, Leandra will find her.”
I open my mouth to spit something rude back to him, but before I can do so, Madoc is nodding his head in full agreement.
“Her safety is most important,” Madoc agrees with a firm nod. “After all, we can’t find Leandra without her.”
Well, that’s a reality check, isn’t it? My cheeks burn with anger and embarrassment.
“I’m going to find Arden,” I tell them. I stomp past Cormal, but he grabs my wrist and pulls me around to face him. I look up and see his blue eyes burning with intent.
“I mean it, Meri,” he says in a stern voice. “Stay here. Promise me.”
For a brief second, I press my lips tightly together like the old days, but I quickly push past my initial reaction. Rivan needs us. It goes against every grain in my body to give him a promise, but I do. Besides, I might have power, but my bodyguards are gone, and I don’t know where to search for Rivan.
“I promise.”
Cormal raises an eyebrow.
Gritting my teeth, I force the words out. “I promise I’ll stay here.”
Satisfied, he tosses an arrogant glance at Madoc. “If I don’t hear from you in a few hours, I’ll call and check on you.”
Madoc snorts. “Don’t bother. Keep yourself safe. Meri would be upset if something happened to you.” Without another word, he disappears through the door.
Cormal picks up his phone and taps on it. A dangerous smile slides across his face.
Curious, I peer over his shoulder and see a dot moving on a map. “Did you bug Madoc’s phone? What is wrong with you?”
“He’s hiding something, and until I know what it is, I’m going to track his every move,” Cormal murmurs. He leans down and gives me a hard kiss. “I’ll call you if I hear anything.” Then he, too, leaves.
Pacing back and forth, I try to get the image of Rivan hurt and needing help out of my head, but it’s almost impossible. Pivoting, I grab my phone and send a text. A second later, the answer comes and I’m out the door.
Arden’s in the training room fighting with Vargas when I enter. Theron and Fallon are watching from the sidelines, fists clenched, as if they hate the sight. I slide up next to them.
Theron’s eyes never move from the two fighters, but he murmurs a quiet greeting.
Fallon bends over and gives me an awkward hug before resuming his tense position. “Good to see you, Meri.”
Astonished, I stare up at the tall Elven prince. “We’re hugging now?”
The corner of Fallon’s mouth curls in a half-smile. “Apparently. Arden says that’s what family does. I mean, mine never did, but my father was an asshole.” He shrugs as if it doesn’t bother him.
“Arden likes to hug. Solandis, Vargas, and Callyx too,” I murmur. “Guess it runs in the family.” Besides Cormal and the occasional child, I can’t remember hugging anyone before Arden. It still feels odd to me.
Clanging swords and swearing brings my gaze back to the fight. Or the end of it, as Vargas stands there scowling at Arden, his hands empty of the sword he held a moment ago.
Arden’s shaking her head at him. “Being a chameleon has made you slow. Or maybe it was living in the Light Fae Kingdom doing nothing but bossing Meri’s guards around. You need practice.” She tosses his sword to him, then turns to Fallon. “You’re up.”
An evil grin replaces the smile on Fallon’s lips, and he rubs his hands together in anticipation. “Get ready, old man. I’ve been waiting months to wipe the floor with you.” A regal-looking silver sword appears in his large hand, and he springs forward.
Vargas’ cups his hand and eggs him forward. “Bring it on, pup.”
The two immediately start whirling and slashing until they’re a blur to the rest of us.
Arden chuckles. “This is definitely helping to take his mind off Solandis and the baby for a little while. It’s not good for them to be holed up in their room.”
Remembering her tiredness at the palace, I share my thoughts with Arden. “It’s more than caution or fear for her safety. This baby is taking a lot out of her. Physically. She’s been exhausted since the moment she became pregnant. All the rest hasn’t helped, but I think there’s more to it. Has she seen a doctor yet?”
Surprised, Arden stares at me for a second. “She never told me this has been going on for a while. I’ll get one here to check her out.”
As she calls the doctor, she raises an eyebrow and asks, “Why did you need to see me so urgently? For Solandis?”
I look at the rune on my hand but close my fingers around it. The spell can wait. “Rivan’s gone missing. Cormal and Madoc are looking for him, but we think he might have tried to go after Brixton.”
Theron turns to face me. “The leader of the Phoenix?”
I forgot he was dark Fae as well as light Fae. “Yes, that’s his father.” I explain to them both what happened to the original Kaius, Fisk’s grandson, and Brixton’s role in his death. “You wouldn’t know of anyone who could help us search the Dark Fae Kingdom, do you?”
“Search, no, but I know someone who lives in the palace who might be able to pass us information,” Theron tells me.
“I don’t want Denir to find out we’re searching for Rivan,” I reply with a frown.
Theron dips his chin in acknowledgement. “My brother, Oryn, owes his allegiance to me, not the king. I’ll see if he’s heard of anything.”
I didn’t know Theron had a dark Fae brother. “Thanks, I’d appreciate it.”
Theron’s hand brushes lightly against Arden’s back as he leaves to make the call.
Arden’s staring at her feet with a frown on her face when I turn back to her.
“The doctor’s on her way. I can’t believe I didn’t have her checked out when she got here,” she says to me. “I did heal all her cuts and bruises, but that’s all I could do. She let me think she was just a little tired because of her ordeal.”
“She may not realize it’s more than that,” I say in return. The sounds of fighting ease. “They’ll be done soon. Let’s get her checked out before they finish.”
We head to the lobby to meet the doctor and bring her up to Solandis’ room.
Surprisingly, Solandis quickly agrees to let the doctor examine her. When they come back into the room, Vargas is striding through the door. He abruptly halts.
“What the hell is going on?” he bellows when he sees the doctor, rushing over to Solandis. “Are you okay? Is it the baby?”
She places a finger on his lips. “I’m fine. Kind of silly, really. With the blood of a cirein-croin in him or her, we need more than the usual food and nutrients. The doctor is going to create a special diet to make sure we get what we need. It’s why I’ve been exceedingly exhausted.”
When Vargas lost his body, he took Kaius’, but just like he didn’t realize he was a chameleon, he didn’t know he was Fisk’s grandson. And Fisk was pure cirein-croin, a legendary sea monster and one of the most badass Water Fae I’ve ever met. Their unborn child carries all this heritage in his blood.
He heaves a sigh of relief. “Good. I hate seeing you so damn tired all the time.” Pulling her closer to him, he kisses her softly. “So, the doctor is sure about the cirein-croin?”
Her lips curve in a tremulous smile. “Looks like this baby is all Fae. Are you okay with that?” Her tone is soft, but I can tell she’s worried he’ll be upset that their child won’t have demon blood in them.
“They’ll have a demon heart,” he assures her.
Arden and I glance at the doctor, and she gives a slight nod. We leave them to the rest of it. Arms around each other, we unanimously turn toward the elevator.
“I need a drink,” Arden says, dropping her head back against the wall. “Join me?”
If I go back to my room, all I’ll do is pace until I hear from Cormal. Plus, maybe Theron will come back with something sooner. I hope so. The thought of Rivan being held somewhere by his father makes my blood boil. After everything he sacrificed for the Fire Fae, and in particular, the Phoenix, he deserves more, especially from his family. And from me.
“I could use a strong drink.”