Chapter 13
ALEX
My mouth gaped at his muscular chest, and I couldn’t tear my eyes from him when he lowered his jeans.
The charcoal gray boxer briefs went the way of his pants.
He displayed his body without shame or modesty.
I took in every inch of him, especially the dark tribal lines that streaked across the left side of his chest and down both arms. I wanted to follow that map with my lips and fingertips, wanted to lick down his muscles, past his abs, only stopping long enough to tease his erection with my tongue.
“Have you seen enough yet?”
I jumped, lifting my attention to his face, and felt my own flush.
Furious Rafe scared the shit out of me, and naked, lustful-looking Rafe made me just as nervous.
Both versions were passionate and cold, stable one minute yet irrational the next.
I lowered my gaze to his erection. Moisture collected at the tip, and some secret part of my psyche celebrated.
I did that to him, without even touching him.
He couldn’t hide his desire like I could mine, collecting between my closed thighs, stowed away and out of sight.
This was the first time I’d felt anything during the past two days.
While locked away in the dark, I’d found a way to shut down.
Maybe I’d experienced a delayed reaction to the horror of nearly drowning, but when he left me alone in that cellar, shivering more violently than ever before, my brain simply stopped functioning like normal. Somehow, I’d found a way to cope.
I’d pretended to be somewhere else. Someone else.
I’d made up a new identity. In my new dream world, I called myself Amy.
Amy was plain and boring and absurdly happy.
Amy had a loving, devoted husband, two adorable kids, and a perfect, non-smelly dog named Zippo.
Amy lived in the south, possibly Arizona, where it was dry and sweltering under the sun.
“Get in,” Rafe said, bunching his hands, and the fantasy of another life dissolved, leaving cold, hard truth in its wake.
I resisted the urge to cover myself as I entered the shower. Next to his beautiful physique, my filthy and unkempt body with curves in all the wrong places paled in comparison.
He stepped in after me and turned on the dual shower heads. Hot spray filled every corner, hitting us from all directions. I gasped when he shoved me against the freezing tile. Without a word, he grabbed a bottle of shampoo and squirted some into a palm before rubbing both hands together.
I closed my eyes and focused on breathing as he started washing my hair, but when he added more soap and slid his hands down my shoulders and over my breasts, I almost came undone, unprepared for those hands gliding over me.
As his fingers blazed along my skin, I wrestled with my demons, the ones that lived to remind me of what a dirty whore I was.
I’d never experienced what was considered a normal physical reaction to sex, the ability to enjoy it without the threat of force or violence.
No one had ever made me feel like this. Rafe had more power in a single touch than Zach had in his entire being.
The heat flaming between my thighs was undeniable, unbearable, and I whimpered when those strong hands drifted over my stomach and smoothed down my legs.
“I’ll have to buy you a shaving kit.” He caressed behind a knee. “I want to shave these legs.”
A shiver traveled along my skin from head to toe, contradictory to the hot shower. He worked his way up my body and tilted my head so the water sluiced over my face and hair.
“Soap’s gone. You can open your eyes now.” His gaze transfixed me, capturing me in green depths from which I’d never return. “Raise your arms.”
Later, I might question why I did it without hesitation. I brought my arms up and held them high. I didn’t think about disobeying, especially when he dropped to his knees and licked his lips, his gaze on my pussy.
“Spread your legs.”
Holy hell. Sucking in a breath, I widened my stance. He wrapped his arms around my hips, hands clutching my ass, and pulled my pelvis toward his face. But he didn’t put his mouth on me. Not yet. He took his time, languid gaze roaming past belly and breasts before settling on my face.
The sight of Rafe naked and on his knees, dark hair plastered to his forehead and drops of water hanging on his lashes, was the most gorgeous view in existence. Reality was far better than the dream.
Except for the part where he’d kidnapped me.
“What do you want from me?” I whispered, confused because he was being so gentle. He’d shown me nothing but cruel detachment since he’d taken me…until I’d fallen into the river.
A violent tremor raced through me, and that night came rushing back; the freezing water closing over my head, the realization I was going to die.
Something else broke through the fog that had blanketed me for the past couple of days.
Him. The way he’d reacted, how he’d been furious and punishing but also fearful of losing me.
It dawned on me that my almost drowning had rattled him, and I wondered what it meant.
His gaze held mine, unblinking as water streamed down his face. “I want many things from you, but right now I want to taste you.” He leaned forward, and I thought I’d pass out when his tongue slid between my folds.
“Oh God, Rafe.”
His fingers dug into my ass, and he let out a long groan that vibrated straight to my core.
I balled my hands, struggling to keep them raised, and let my head fall back against the tile.
My body sang for him, quivered and ached with the mere brush of his lips, the teasing scrape of teeth.
My breaths burst out in short gasps, and I closed my eyes and let the water wash over my forehead and cheeks as an orgasm built.
I was so close. Two more strokes of his tongue, and my toes would curl.
I’d slide to the floor in completion, limbs as fluid as the water beating down on us.
He jerked back and looked up at me, a hard glint in his eyes.
“Don’t stop.” I thrust my hips toward him, a silent plea for him to finish. He rose and held my face, mouth hovering an inch from mine as our eyes locked, and licked the water from his lips.
My jaw slackened, and I felt the spray from the shower misting on my tongue. He was going to kiss me. I was sure of it. “Rafe,” I whispered, aching to taste him. Just once.
He pulled my arms down. “Wrap your hand around me.”
I closed my fingers around his erection, and my palm glided over silky smooth skin. His breath shuddered out with every stroke and mingled with mine in a frenzy of want and need. The air between us grew moist and warm from the steam of the shower.
“Fuck,” he groaned, his forehead falling against mine, “that feels incredible. Keep going.”
Mindlessly, I rubbed him and watched in wonder as he lost himself to my touch. With each groan and sigh that erupted from his beautiful mouth, my own need bloomed out of control.
“I want you so much,” I said.
He let out a growl and stilled my movement. “You’re not getting off.”
If he intended to drive me mad by using my desire for him as a weapon, then he’d have no problem succeeding.
Rafe had turned into a cruel son of a bitch.
“Get on your knees, sweetheart.” How I hated that endearment coming from his lips. He said it with scorn, made it sound like an insult. Hands gripping my shoulders, he pushed down hard until my knees buckled.
The thought of sucking his cock shouldn’t excite me so much. Shit, I was in big trouble. He was toying with me, making me hot and wet for him, and leaving me with no end in sight.
He angled my head back, his touch somehow gentle despite the iron-like hold he had on me. I opened my mouth, my heart thudding in my ears as he pushed his cock inside.
“Fuck. I haven’t had a woman suck me off in eight years.”
His admission filled me with a sense of power.
I’d be the one to bring him pleasure after all this time.
I closed my lips around his shaft and peeked up at him, needing the connection, but he avoided eye contact.
He tipped forward, palms slamming against the tile, and his chest rose and fell shallowly, biceps rippling, tattoos a dark sheen underneath the water.
He grunted with each thrust, and his essence infused my tongue with the heady taste of him. I wanted him inside me so badly—a desperate need I was certain would destroy me.
You’re not getting off.
Eventually, he was going to fuck me again.
And eventually, I was going to break from frustration.