Chapter 2
Igagged for what seemed like the tenth time and heaved more of my lunch into the toilet.
I’d probably never eat chow mein again. Getting to my feet, I braced against the stall and closed my eyes.
Gage was all I thought about. Nothing else penetrated past the haze in my mind.
I tried to imagine him touching me…doing more than touching me, but my stomach rolled again at the thought.
I stumbled out of the stall, still shaking, but at least I’d stopped vomiting. Katherine, the receptionist, quirked an eyebrow as she reapplied her lipstick. “Let me guess, knocked up?”
“Bad food at lunch today.” Refusing to rise to her bait, I joined her at the sink and calmly washed my hands.
Katherine was one of those preppy girls, the kind who never had a hair out of place and wouldn’t be caught in a morgue wearing anything other than a designer label.
She also didn’t hesitate to bare her claws if she thought someone was poaching on her turf.
In her ice-blue eyes, Gage Channing was off-limits to everyone but herself.
Why couldn’t he have chosen her to torment and terrorize?
I left the restroom, praying she wouldn’t feed the office grapevine with stories of a pregnancy, and got stuck in rush-hour traffic on my way to BodyScape Spa, which proved to be a more humiliating experience than I imagined.
Maybe it was because of Glenda’s familiarity with “Mr. Channing’s preferences,” but I couldn’t help but speculate on the number of women he’d sent there.
Had there been others like me? Women he’d coerced and blackmailed?
Or had they gone willingly? Gage was exceptionally attractive, and he was wealthy and successful to boot.
A formidable package for sure, rolled into six feet of toned body, a head full of black hair, and a striking gaze that had the ability to pin you to the wall.
I wasn’t immune to how easy on the eyes my boss was.
For the past three years, I’d been immune to men period, and I’d certainly never entertained the idea of going to bed with my employer. It weirded me out to realize he’d been waiting for the perfect moment to ensnare me—to subject me to his twisted brand of sexual games.
“This’ll hurt,” Glenda warned. She ripped the wax off my leg like a Band-Aid, and I bit my lip to keep from groaning. I should be grateful it wasn’t my bikini area; Gage had given Glenda instructions to leave me natural but trimmed down there.
The rest of the appointment went by much like the past hour had—in a daze.
By the time I unlocked my car, night had fallen, and my nerves had multiplied.
I wasn’t ready for this. I didn’t think twice about driving to the Hospital.
I’d be late due to the detour, but I wasn’t about to disappear on Eve without saying goodbye.
Two days was a long time to a three-year-old.
Downtown Portland reflected a glittering skyline on the Willamette River, and Christmas lights lit up Pill Hill—which was home to the hospital. The temperature had dropped, and I was still rubbing my hands together when I arrived on Eve’s floor.
“Good evening, Kayla,” the nightshift nurse said. “Eve’s been asking for you.”
Guilt clawed at my gut. How could I expect my baby to understand? “Thanks, Mel.” I headed to Eve’s room, and her tiny face lit up the instant she saw me. Every day she grew paler, smaller—the hospital bed nearly swallowed her whole—but her eyes still sparkled with innocence.
“Hi, baby.”
“Mama! Look what I color?” She proudly displayed her scribbled doodle.
“You drew this? You’re so talented.” I pulled her into a tight hug and held on a little longer than I normally would.
The thought of being away for two days broke my heart.
God, I was going to miss her. I blinked back tears and tucked her into bed.
She jabbered on for a few minutes, words only a mother could detect without asking her to repeat them a dozen times.
“Eve,” I began gently, “I’ve gotta go away—”
“Hello, Kayla.”
My breath stalled at the sound of his voice. Time had done nothing to erase it from my mind. I slowly turned. He stood in the doorway, a stethoscope dangling from his neck. God, he was a doctor now. Last I’d seen him, he’d been on the verge of entering medical school.
Last I’d seen him, I’d broken both of our hearts.
“Ian…it’s been a long time.” What kind of idiotic response was that? Seven years and that was all I could come up with?
His hazel gaze darted to Eve, and I didn’t have to guess at the confusion on his face.
Seven years ago I’d been pregnant; Eve was only three.
“And apparently a lot has happened since.” He brought a hand up and fiddled with the pen in his shirt pocket, and his eyes drifted to my left hand.
Sometimes I still felt the phantom weight of my wedding band.
“You work here now?” I asked before he could voice the questions I saw in his eyes—the ones I didn’t want to answer.
“Just transferred from Salem.” He stepped inside and closed the door. “I heard your daughter was here. I wanted to come by and see you. See if I could do anything to help.” He opened his mouth, then snapped it shut. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have intruded like this.”
“It’s okay, you’re not.”
He moved to Eve’s bedside. She’d settled into a light doze. “Leukemia?”
I wrapped my arms around myself and nodded.
“What phase is she?”
“Acute. She stopped responding to chemo.”
“Jesus, Kayla.” He ran a hand through his short hair; it was lighter than I remembered. “I’m sorry.”
“We’re not giving up.” I lost count of how many times I recited the phrase daily.
Ian was about to say more when my cell vibrated in my pocket.
I pulled it out, and upon recognizing Gage’s number, willed my face into a neutral mask.
“I’m sorry, I have to go. I…I have a business trip this weekend.
I tried getting out of it.” I nibbled on my lip and looked at Eve. “I hate leaving her.”
Ian pulled out a prescription tablet and wrote down his number.
“Call me if you need anything. Or even if you don’t…
well, you know how to reach me now.” His fingers brushed mine, lingering a few seconds as he passed me the slip of paper, and that familiar spark that had been dormant for so long sprung to life.
My heart thundered in my ears as our eyes met.
He started to move away, but I grabbed his arm.
“Ian, wait…there is something you can do for me.” I let go of his sleeve. “Can you keep an eye on Eve for me? You know, if you’re gonna be here?”
“That’s not a problem. I can do that.”
A lock of hair fell over his brow, and I clenched my fists to keep from brushing it back. “Thank you.”
“No problem. I’ll see you when you get back.” He hesitated a few seconds, and then he noiselessly disappeared into the hall.