Chapter 3 #2
But it won’t be behind me. That stupid, humiliating video will be on the internet forever.
“Alex looks excited,” Mom says as she butters the buns and then splays them out on a hot pan.
Willow is placing the wieners into the boiling water while I take out the condiments. I see her rolling her eyes.
“You didn’t have to come,” I tell her. “You know, not all of us have lawyer money. Fifty thousand dollars is a life-changing amount for us.”
“Stop pretending he did it for the money,” Willow snaps. “He did it to make you feel like an idiot. You know that, don’t you?”
“He’s just…”
I have spent the past three years making excuses for that man.
He’s just a prankster. He didn’t mean to be hurtful.
He’s fun. He’s spontaneous. He hates planning but he means well.
He’ll grow up. He just needs time. He was never taught how to clean up.
He shows love differently. He doesn’t think before he speaks, but he’s not malicious.
Marriage will settle him. Commitment will settle him. Real life will settle him.
I take a deep breath and exhale long and hard. I think I’m done making excuses for Alex Hanks.
“Don’t forget to set the timer,” I say, ignoring her comment.
A headache begins pounding its way into my head as I leave the kitchen and head into the living room to find Alex. He really should be helping.
“Faye,” Sharon says, lifting her empty wine glass and waving it around like she’s ordering another one from the help. “I’ll take a refill.”
“The bottle is in the kitchen,” I snap as I continue into the bedroom.
I hear her shocked gasp and a devilish little thrill ripples through me.
Alex and his brother are sitting on the bed with Pokemon cards splayed out all around them. Derek calls himself an entrepreneur, but all he does is line up at Walmart and Costco to buy boxes of Pokemon cards and then he resells them for more money to kids who actually collect them.
“Can you come help?”
“I’m helping Derek evaluate these.”
I grit my teeth. I’m dangerously close to having no more fucks.
I spot an especially shiny card propped up on my pillow. The boys freak out as I grab it.
“I’ll tear this in half,” I warn.
“Don’t,” Derek begs. “That’s a limited-edition Charizard ex. It’s worth over three hundred dollars!”
“I don’t care,” I say, ready to tear it. “Alex. Get in the kitchen and help.”
Derek closes his eyes and mutters a string of prayers.
“Okay,” Alex says like a petulant teenager as he stands up with a roll of his eyes.
He leaves the room and I toss the card onto the bed. Derek lunges on it, making sure it’s not damaged.
“Don’t put anything on my pillow,” I snap before I head back out.
We get the hot dogs ready and dinner is as awkward as ever. I imagine future children at the end of the table watching this and I get so depressed.
After dinner, Alex and Derek disappear into the living room to set up the laptop. Greg gets up and helps me bring dishes into the kitchen without being asked. He doesn’t say much, just carries two stacks of plates and gives me a sympathetic look, which almost makes me tear up.
“Thanks,” I whisper.
He smiles sadly. “Anytime.”
Willow comes in carrying empty glasses. “You still have time,” she says quietly.
I blink at her. “For what?”
“To fake your own death.”
“Willow.”
“What? It’s a valid option. I’ll help you sell it.”
“Can you please stop?” I beg.
“Faye, you do realize this is insane, right? This whole thing?”
“God, you’re acting like he killed someone! It’s a funny video show.”
“It’s not funny.”
“I know that.”
“Then why are we all here celebrating like he cured cancer? You should tell him to go fuck himself.”
Before I can answer, Dad calls from the living room, “Showtime, everybody!”
I suddenly feel like crying. Willow must see it because she gives me a tender hug. “I do support you,” she whispers. “I just hate every second of this.”
Me too.
We head into the living room and sit on the couch with the helium balloons set up beside us. The laptop is facing us, that camera lens looking pretty judgy as it points at me.
It’s just supposed to be me and Alex, but Sharon sits down beside me, taking up half the couch. I’m squeezed between them, feeling lightheaded, and not in the good way.
I don’t even care. I just want to get this over with.
The producer pops up on the laptop screen and gives us some quick instructions. We’re supposed to wave as the host, Walton Green, announces the three finalists and plays the clips. If we’re selected as the winner, the host will talk to us for about twenty to thirty seconds.
I glance at the window, wondering if it’s too late to fake my own death. I could swan dive right out of there.
“Here we go,” Alex whispers as the host comes on.
“Our first finalist,” Walton says, presenting the clip. “Baby go bye bye.”
A clip plays of a toddler pushing another toddler off a couch. He smiles at the camera and says, ‘Baby go bye bye.’
My family looks horrified, but Alex and Sharon laugh as the family comes on, waving to the camera.
“Our second finalist,” Walton says, “is granny’s VR faceplant!”
A grandmother comes on the screen with a virtual reality headset on. She screams and runs right into the TV, smashing it.
“Do they all get hurt in this show?” Mom whispers.
“Yup,” Willow says.
The grandmother comes on the screen, surrounded by a lot of grandkids. They’re all waving.
“And our last finalist,” Walton says, “is prank engagement fall!”
My heart stops as my engagement video comes on the screen. This is the first time I’ve seen it. I’ve had it on my phone for weeks, but I haven’t actually watched it. I refused.
I guess I was pretending it never happened. Maybe if I never saw it, I didn’t have to see how mean and cruel it really was.
But it’s in my face now. There’s no more hiding.
In the video, I’m standing in the backyard, watching with excitement as Alex drops to his knee. “Will you marry me?” he asks.
I start tearing up as I nod my head and say ‘yes’.
I look so emotional. So happy.