Chapter 20 #2
“What I didn’t tell you is that I hit puberty when I turned eleven.
I was an early bloomer.” I swallow. “Almost overnight, I developed breasts and hips. Enough to attract the attention of my foster father at the placement I was at. He tried to fondle me. I slapped him. Which resulted in him beating me up. My foster mother walked in and managed to pull him off.”
“Oh my god,” she gasps.
I look away, then back at her. “The next day, I was transferred to stay with Irene, who went on to adopt me. I didn’t make it easy on her, either.
” I half smile at the recollection. “She put up with my tantrums. She told me I could lash out as much as I wanted but she wasn’t giving up on me.
She believed in me.” I blink away the moisture in my eyes.
“If not for her, I wouldn’t have found a home or begun to believe in myself again.
Irene worked hard to take care of me. After me, she went onto adopt Jillian and Ethan, as well. ”
Zoey wrinkles her forehead; a considering look on her features. “Did both of them come to stay with Irene as foster kids first?”
I nod. “I know it seems like a lot for a single woman to take on, but Irene was determined. She, herself, grew up in the care system and was adamant that she would do everything possible to break that cycle for as many kids in the system as possible. That she was on her own was never a deterrent.”
“She’s an inspiration,” Zoey says softly.
“Oh, she is. Unfortunately, about the time I turned eighteen and completed my final year of high school, she was in an accident. It resulted in her being laid up in hospital for months. She lost her job and could no longer support us.”
“I remember,” Zoey says softly. "I’m so sorry, June. I never realized how tough things were for you."
“I should have shared more with you, it’s just... I didn’t want you to feel sorry for me, you know?”
“I’m your friend, I’d never make you feel bad about the things you went through,” Zoey’s eyes shine with love.
She really is a good friend. Fighting back emotions, I gulp hard. “After Irene was laid off, I insisted on taking a job to help out.”
“I bet she wasn’t happy about that,” Zoey murmurs.
“No, she wasn’t.” I half smile in recollection. “She wanted me to go to university, but I told her I’d rather be working and earning, anyway. I wanted to do my bit to take care of us. She recovered, but her health has never been the same.”
As always, when I think of that time in our lives, my chest tightens.
“She couldn’t work the long hours she used to.
Initially, I worked retail jobs, then graduated to administrative roles.
Irene worked part-time, but it wasn’t nearly enough to pay her rent.
Luckily, I began to make enough to take care of us.
It’s thanks to Irene, I carved out a future for myself.
It’s thanks to her, I developed my identity.
It’s why I’m determined to take care of her and to give Jillian and Ethan the opportunities I never had. ”
“She’s an amazing woman. An extraordinarily strong woman.” Zoey smiles. "So are you."
I ignore her compliment; I don't come close to Irene.
"You have no idea what she did for me.” I rub the back of my hand across my nose.
“It’s because Irene fought with my school to ensure the teachers gave me the additional attention I needed to catch up with my grades, that I made it through high school.
She was so patient with me. I owe her everything.
The least I can do is to make sure she has a comfortable home of her own. "
My throat constricts as I try to compose myself. She sees the agitation on my face, and her expression crumples.
"I’m so sorry June. I never meant to belittle everything Irene has done for you.”
“I sense a 'but' coming.” I sniffle.
“But I love you so much, and I’ve seen you struggle with your conscience over the years. I’ve seen you work yourself to the bone to take care of your family, and I’m so proud of you for that. But also, I wish you’d take some time out for yourself, for self-care as well, you know?"
I nod. "You’re a good friend, Zoey. You’ve worried about me over the years, and you’ve constantly pushed me to take care of myself, and I am grateful for that.
" I half smile. "And yes, I do realize that, like many adopted children, I carry this guilt around with me.
Not to mention abandonment issues. And a part of me always feels like the people who love me most are the ones who will eventually give me up, like my birth mother did.
" I half laugh. "Can you tell I’ve been doing a lot of work on myself to figure things out? "
"Oh, sweetheart, I can only imagine what you’re going through. You are a tough, strong girl. You’re the one who rescued me from the mean girls in high school. Hell, you got into a cat fight with them—”
"I was suspended for a week." I chuckle in recollection. I knew I’d get into trouble but that hadn’t stopped me from springing to my friend’s defense. "And when I told Irene why, she said I’d done the right thing."
"She did?" Zoey blinks. "You never told me that."
"My ma was, and is, seriously, the best mother." And Irene is my ma, in every way, even if I do feel this need to search for my birth mother, to answer questions about my past. "She gave me enough space to work things out, while also drawing boundaries, know what I mean?"
Zoey nods. "It’s why I understand why you’re doing so much for your family. All I’m asking… No, begging you, is to also take the time to enjoy life." She has such a pleading look on her face that I have to nod.
"You’re right again. I admit, I can sometimes be very serious."
"Sometimes?" She scoffs.
"Okay, many times." I chuckle. "It’s why I like to hang with you. You’re my conscience when it comes to letting my hair down."
"Good." She nods. "Get dressed and meet me at the 7A Club in an hour."