Chapter Sixty-Seven Ella
Chapter Sixty-Seven
Ella
Icall in sick for work and hide the rest of the day in my cabin.
I sleep a lot. It seems to be the easiest way to avoid thinking about the baby growing inside me.
Claudette leaves me alone, probably sensing I need time to come to terms with what’s happening.
When I wake the next morning, my body feels heavy and weak. My head is pounding. It’s probably the tension, the hormones, or both.
There’s a knock on the door. I groan as I drag myself out of bed. I already know who it is.
“How are you this morning, darling?” Claudette asks when I open the door.
“Pregnant,” I tell her flatly.
Her expression softens as she steps into my shoebox of a cabin and sits on the edge of the bed.
“I take it you’re not excited about it?”
“How could I be?” The words tumble out fast, sharp, and panicked.
“I’m going to America to start over. Everything will be ten thousand times harder now.
How am I supposed to work with a child? I have no money.
No safety net. What if something goes wrong?
I can’t even afford medical care. This is hopeless. ”
There’s another part I don’t say out loud. A child makes me easier to find. If he looks like his father, no disguise in the world will be enough.
God, I’m so screwed.
“My life is fucked,” I whisper.
“Darling,” Claudette says gently, “I get this isn’t what you wanted.”
Understatement of the century.
“But a child is always a blessing. It can give you focus. Strength. Purpose when everything else feels like it’s falling apart.”
My hand moves on instinct, resting against my stomach, stroking the still-flat skin.
“Have you forgotten what I told you the other day?” she continues. “You have help. You are not alone.”
She cups my face, wiping away the few tears that escaped with the pads of her thumbs.
“And I’m here for you too. Even after this trip. You can call me anytime, and I will answer.”
I nod, forcing something like a smile.
“Trust me,” she says softly. “Everything will work out.”
I wish I had her optimism.
“Now rest some more. I’ll tell your boss you’re still sick.”
She presses me gently back onto the bed, tucks the blanket around me, and kisses the top of my head.
“I’ll check on you later,” she murmurs. “And remember, this is a blessing.”
She leaves quietly.
I close my eyes, letting the silence settle. Claudette’s words echo in my mind, calming some of the chaos but not erasing it.
What if she’s wrong?
The unwelcome thought sneaks in. My hands drift back to my stomach and stay there.
There’s a life growing inside me.
It feels unreal… and terrifying. And yet, beneath all that fear, there’s a flicker of awe I can’t ignore.
I stroke my abdomen slowly.
“Hello there, little peanut,” I whisper. “You weren’t part of the plan, but I promise I’ll take good care of you.”
Rhia’s voice floats into my mind. If life hands you lemons, make lemonade.
This isn’t a lemon. It’s an earthquake.
God, I wish I could call my best friend. Does this count as an emergency?
Chin up, Ella, I tell myself, trying to be my own cheerleader.
Claudette believes it will work out, and somehow I trust her.
Miraculously, I feel better the next morning. Maybe two days of hiding in bed was exactly what I needed.
Is it my imagination, or are my nipples sore?
I frown.
No, that has to be my mind playing tricks on me. I find out I’m pregnant and suddenly every sensation becomes a symptom.
My thoughts drift to the man responsible for all of this. I close my eyes, trying to push away my yearning for him.
If only he knew.
He’d be thrilled. This is what he wanted.
My mind conjures images of Tiero doting on me and my growing belly, his hand splayed possessively over my stomach. Him holding our newborn, pride blazing in his eyes. Laughing as he lifts our child into the air.
A smile spreads across my face before I can stop it.
Am I robbing my child of his father? Of stability? Of love?
Then memories of Oriana’s lifeless eyes and Alonso bleeding on the floor crash back into me.
My eyes fly open as my heart slams against my ribs. I clutch my chest, my breathing coming fast and shallow.
The other side of Tiero crashes back into me, his jealousy, his possessiveness, the ever-present danger.
His voice echoes in my mind.
You’re born into this family, and you’ll die in it. There’s no way out but death.
No, I made the right choice. I can’t bring a child into that world.
A hard resolve settles deep in my bones.
My child will not be born into his father’s life of violence and fear.
Gualtiero De Marco must never find out about this pregnancy. I will move heaven and earth to keep my child safe, even if it costs me everything.
I may not be able to give him much, but I will give him peace. He will never grow up thinking cruelty is normal or danger is inevitable.
Not on my watch.
“We’ve got this,” I whisper, patting my belly.
My baby will have all my love. We’ll make it together.
The fear is still there, but it no longer owns me. In its place is something steadier. Purpose.
Like Claudette said, this little peanut is already giving me focus, pulling me forward instead of letting me drown.
Giving up is not an option.
Peanut needs me. And God help me, I need him too… or her.
I press my palm more firmly against my abdomen.
“Your daddy might be a gangster,” I murmur, “but mommy will keep you safe.”
If I have to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder, so be it.
I’ll learn whatever I need to learn. Knowing self-defense and how to shoot would be useful, no matter how much I dislike guns.
My baby’s life could depend on it. I’m not taking any chances. I will do whatever I must.
This won’t be an easy road.
But it’s mine now.
And I’ll walk it.