Chapter Four
CHAPTER FOUR
The roar of the shower filled my ears, distracting me from the awful memories of lunch with my family. Closing my eyes, I tilted my head back, letting the hot water flow through my hair. I needed to refresh myself and wash away the grime and heaviness of the day.
At least I was back home in my apartment, where I felt safe. It was a shame that I couldn’t feel that way in my own childhood home.
Was I really a bad person, like they claimed? Was I shallow, greedy, and selfish?
Maybe I was. Maybe I shouldn’t have argued and just written them a check, like I had every other time.
My stomach twisted, and when I shut off the water, the volume of my thoughts amplified. I dried off and twirled my hair up in a microfiber towel before stepping up to my long bathroom counter with a lit-up mirror.
I reached for my small but expensive collection of skincare products. I hadn’t thought twice when buying these products, so why didn’t I give my family money?
Because they would waste it whereas I treasured every single thing that I bought myself. Every single thing that I earned by putting years and years of hard work and effort into my career. How many hours did I spend studying throughout high school, college, and law school? How many late hours did I pull at my law firm?
But despite everything, I still felt guilty.
I tried to focus on applying my skincare, meticulously putting on each layer until my skin glowed. But my heart still felt heavy.
After putting on my pajama dress, I took my laptop to the dining table and started searching for charities. Impulsively, I donated money to a variety of causes: animal shelters, human rights organizations, cancer research, homeless shelters.
There. This was proof I wasn’t a horrible person. A greedy person wouldn’t have donated to charity.
Still, the painful emptiness in my gut remained. The donations hadn’t been enough.
There had to be something I could do to prove I wasn’t a bad person.
I wanted to help someone personally. I wanted a grateful smile, not the ugly words my family had shouted at me.
Robert popped into my mind. The smile he’d given me when I agreed to help him had been so nice. He’d said I was an angel.
But then he’d looked defeated the last time I saw him. Not only was I unable to help him out with the apartment situation, but I didn’t even allow him to feel like he properly thanked me for my time and effort.
He just wanted dinner. The least I could’ve done was agreed. I didn’t want him to spend any money on me, but now that I thought about it, it had been rude of me to refuse.
I snatched up my phone and tapped on his contact. I’d received his phone number when he messaged me his rental contract.
The phone rang and rang and rang…
“Hello?” His deep voice answered.
For a second, I was distracted by the smooth gravel of his voice, but I quickly snapped myself out of the daze.“Hi Robert. It’s Brooke.”
“Hey Brooke. Everything alright?”
“Yes, um,” I stumbled over my own words, grimacing at myself. “I’d like to take you up on your offer of getting a meal. Would lunch tomorrow work for you?”
“Yeah, of course. Did you have a place in mind?”
“Meet me at Silver Lotus at noon,” I told him. “It’s one of my favorite places. You like sushi, right?”
“Sure,” he said, and I could hear a smile in his voice. “I’ll see you there at noon.”
“See you there,” I replied, hanging up the phone before I said something regrettable.
Maybe this was a bad idea, but I wouldn’t know until tomorrow.
A fresh, oceanic smell floated through Silver Lotus as I ventured through the dimly lit restaurant, searching for the table Robert had already claimed for us. The sounds of light chatter, plates clinking, and a decorative fountain running in the foyer surrounded me, but a voice immediately broke through the swarm of noise.
“Brooke.”
I turned to see Robert seated at a table in the corner. Compared to the fashionable couples and the rich retirees in their polos and khakis, he looked a little out of place in his jeans and wool sweater, but he still looked good. With his handsome face and fit body, I was sure he could pull off anything.
“Thank you for meeting me,” I said, taking my seat across from him.
“No, thank you,” Robert replied with a smile. “I’m glad we could do this.”
I picked up the menu. “Me too. If you like sushi, you’ll definitely like this place. I get takeout here after work all the time.” I flicked through the thick pages, but paused when I caught sight of the prices.
Maybe I made a mistake choosing this place. I had wanted to eat somewhere familiar and this place served some of the best food in the city, but maybe it was too expensive for Robert.
Guilt flooded me but I managed to collect myself enough to look through the menu and select something on the more affordable side.
“What would you like to eat?” our waiter asked once he appeared at our table.
“I’ll just do a spicy tuna roll,” I replied as I handed him my menu.
Robert frowned at me. “That’s all?”
I nodded.
“That’s not fine with me,” Robert told me. “This is your favorite place. You need to show me the ropes.”
“Okay,” I said with a smile, my shoulders relaxing. I ordered a few dishes to share with Robert — Tuna tataki, salmon sushi, and the sashimi selection. I ordered a Yuzu Spritz cocktail for myself, while Robert ordered a glass of Japanese whiskey.
“So, a big-time lawyer. Your family must be really proud,” Robert commented after the waiter left.
I tried not to wince, because I didn’t want to think about my family. “They are,” I said, and it was mostly true. They didn’t care about the intricacies of my work, but they loved asking me about my salary.
“Your dreams came true. I remember you wanted to be a lawyer back when you were with Mike.”
I nodded. “It’s been my goal since high school,” I said. “Are you still working in construction?”
His brows jumped up. “You remembered?”
“I think Mike mentioned you had your own business?”
His gaze flickered away. “I left the company, but I’m still in construction. It’s tough work, but I can’t complain. It keeps me in shape, at least.”
It took all of me not to let my gaze rake over his shoulders and chest. “That’s good,” I said in a neutral tone. “I’m practically glued to my desk at work, so I have to make a concentrated effort to exercise.”
“Let me guess, pilates?”
I gave him a suspicious look. “How’d you know?”
“All the young women in the city do pilates,” he replied with a smile.
I laughed. “Not all. One of my friends does yoga, and she’s trying to get me to convert.”
Our conversation was interrupted by the waiter bringing over our drinks, as well as the sashimi selection. There was also a side dish with soy sauce and wasabi.
“Looks good,” Robert said, using his chopsticks to pick up one of the thin slices of mackerel. I watched in slow motion as he added a generous amount of wasabi.
“Wow,” I said as he popped the raw fish into his mouth. “You must be good with spice.”
His jaw moved as he chewed, and a second later, he made a choking noise. He quickly covered it up, but picked up his whiskey and took a big gulp.
I started to laugh — I couldn’t help myself.
“Be honest with me, Robert,” I said, once I’d forced myself to stop laughing. “Have you had sushi before?”
“I’ve had California rolls before.” He blinked a few times — his eyes had gone red from the wasabi.
“You said you liked sushi!”
“You said this was one of your favorite places. I didn’t want to make a fuss, not when I was lucky to get you to agree to a meal after all.”
“Well,” I said, “it’s a good opportunity to catch up.” I picked up my cocktail to hide my smile. If I thought about Robert eating wasabi, I’d start laughing again.
Robert gave me a look that suggested he knew exactly what I was smiling to myself about.
“Here,” I said, and demonstrated how I liked to eat the sashimi, only putting on a tiny bit of wasabi. “If you don’t like it, you can forgo it altogether.”
He copied my action. This time, when he chewed the fish, he didn’t choke, and after a few seconds, his eyes lit up. “The flavor is subtle, but I like it.”
“Right?”
The waiter brought out the other dishes, and we discussed the food as we ate. I was glad Robert was enjoying himself. Last year, I’d taken my parents here to celebrate Mom’s birthday, but they’d spent the whole time complaining about the food and talking so loudly, we kept getting looks from nearby patrons.
Afterwards, they asked if I purposely tried to upset them by taking them somewhere fancy. They accused me of trying to make them feel out of place, and ignored me when I tried to explain that Silver Lotus was one of my favorite restaurants, and I thought they’d enjoy it.
“I can see why this is one of your favorite restaurants,” Robert said, once we had finished eating.
I smiled. “I’ve tried a lot of sushi places in the city, but I keep coming back to this one.”
His eyes fixed on mine. “Thank you again for your help, Brooke.”
My cheeks went a bit warm. “It was nothing. Please, don’t mention it.”
I craved compliments, but I never knew how to receive them. I decided to change the topic. “Have you been searching for a new place to live?”
He leaned back in his seat. “I have. Right now, it’s impossible to find a reasonably priced one-bedder. You know how the rental market is here. I’ve been trying to find a place to share, but no one wants to live with an old man.” He let out a self-deprecating laugh.
“You have a week left to find a new place, right?” I asked.
He nodded. “If I can’t find anywhere, I might stay on a buddy’s couch for a bit. If I get really desperate, I’ll beg my ex-wife for a place to stay.”
So they had divorced. I wondered why, but didn’t want to pry.
“I’m sorry about your situation,” I murmured. He was on the verge of being homeless. I didn’t know him very well, but he seemed like a kind guy.
“Hey, don’t apologize,” he said. “It’s not your fault.” He smiled at me. Despite everything, he didn’t want me to worry about him.
But I did. Despite what my family said, I wasn’t completely selfish. I wanted to help him.
The realization slowly dawned on me.
I could help him.
“You could stay at my place.” The words blurted out of me before I thought twice.
His eyes widened, and then he paused, like he wasn’t sure whether he misheard. “What? No, I couldn’t do that.”
But I was already nodding. The more I thought about it, the more it made sense.
Besides, a small voice said in my head, if you let him live with you, this proves you’re definitely not a bad person.
“Just listen,” I said, sitting up straighter. “My apartment is in a good location. I have two spare bedrooms, so there is more than enough space.” He deserved a comfortable place to stay, and a bedroom was way better than a friend’s couch. “It wouldn’t have to be forever, just until you find somewhere decent.”
“Brooke,” he said, his brow creasing. “That’s generous of you, but I can’t accept charity.”
“It’s not charity,” I insisted. “I would still charge you rent.” I tossed out a number that was reasonable but still much cheaper than the market rate. “I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t really mean it. I’ve lived by myself for a few years now. It’ll be nice to have someone else in the house.”
Robert blinked at me. “I … I mean … this is an amazing deal. But are you sure?”
“I’m very sure,” I said. “Just say yes. I’m a lawyer, so I’m automatically very stubborn.”
A laugh broke from him as he shook his head at me. “Well, you are very persuasive. If you’re a hundred percent fine with it, I’d be a fool to say no.”
My heart fluttered, briefly catching me off guard, but I gathered myself. “Then it’s settled. I’ll fix up one of the bedrooms for you.”
Robert leaned forward, and his relieved expression faded into a more serious one. “Thank you, Brooke. You’ve been one of the only people in my corner through this. That means more than I can explain.”
Something soft spread through me as I held his gaze. I knew how he felt — how much it meant to have someone in your corner. That was part of the reason I loved my friends Alison and Emilia so much. They provided me the support and encouragement that my family never gave me.
“I’m just happy to help,” I said.