Epilogue 2 #3
I wait until his footsteps fade before sinking awkwardly to my knees on the frozen ground, my gloved hand coming to rest protectively over my slightly rounded belly.
“Hello, Mom,” I whisper, my breath visible in the cold air. The words taste wrong on my tongue, hollow and insufficient for everything that churns inside me.
“I got your letter,” I continue, my voice gaining strength with each word.
The headstone offers no response, just sits there, solid and unyielding against the gray winter sky. A bitter laugh escapes me, short and sharp.
“God, I wish you were here so I could scream at you properly,” I say, tears suddenly burning behind my eyes. “So I could ask you why… why you let me believe a lie my entire life. Why you let Sabrina hate me for something that wasn’t my fault. Why you didn’t tell me the truth before you died.”
My voice rises with each question, echoing across the empty cemetery. A crow caws from a nearby tree, the only witness to my pain besides my silent, watchful husband.
“That’s what really pisses me off,” I continue. “I know why; your letter explained it. But I… it doesn’t make sense, Mom. As my parent, you should want to protect me, right?”
Shaking my head, I pinch the bridge of my nose while silently counting to ten. Asking the dead doesn’t give me different answers or explanations than the ones in the letter. That’s something I need to come to terms with in time.
“Do you know what Sabrina did because of this secret?” I demand, anger surging hot through my veins despite the cold. “She tried to have me killed, Mom. She conspired with a monster to end my life because she blamed me for Dad’s suicide. Because I was proof of your betrayal.”
Tears spill over now, hot against my wind-chilled cheeks. I brush them away roughly with my glove.
“My own sister wanted me dead because of a secret you kept. And now she’s gone too.” I don’t elaborate—can’t bring myself to say that Raffaele put a bullet through her head while I climbed the stairs, listening to her final scream.
Some truths don’t need to be spoken aloud, even to the dead.
“I had to find out from her that Dad killed himself because he discovered I wasn’t his.” I pause to blow my nose. “And then from your letter that my biological dad was just some tourist passing through who never even knew I existed.” The words taste like poison as they leave my lips.
I slam my fist down on the frozen earth beside the grave, pain shooting up my arm. “Damn you for this! Damn you for lying! For making me question everything I thought I knew about myself!”
The letter in my hand crumples as my fingers tighten around it, the paper crinkling loudly in the cemetery’s silence. I want to tear it to pieces, scatter the confessions to the wind, but I can’t. It’s the only explanation I’ll ever have.
My hand moves to my belly again, feeling the slight curve that houses my child. A life created from love, not deception.
“I’m going to be a mom too,” I tell her, my voice softening despite my anger. “And I promise I will never lie to my baby the way you lied to me. No matter how painful the truth might be.”
The wind picks up, whipping strands of my red hair across my face.
“But you know what’s strange?” I continue, wiping fresh tears with my free hand. “Even after everything—after the lies, after learning what those lies cost me—I still love you. Sabrina as well. I still love her.”
The admission breaks something loose inside me, and suddenly I’m sobbing—deep, body-wracking sobs that leave me gasping for breath in the cold air. I hunch forward, one hand braced against her headstone, the other still protectively covering my belly.
“You taught me how to bake,” I whisper between sobs. “How to run the business. How to be strong. You were there for me every day of your life, even when you were sick. Even when you were dying.”
I straighten slowly, looking at her name carved in stone. “So I’m going to choose to believe you meant well. That you truly thought you were protecting me. That’s the only way I can move forward.”
The tears slow as a strange calm settles over me. I smooth the crumpled letter against my thigh, folding it carefully before tucking it back into my pocket.
“I’m happy, Mom,” I say softly. “Despite everything. I’m married to an incredible man who loves me—really loves me, all of me. I’m having a baby. I’m back at the bakery, making it mine.”
I pause, gathering my thoughts. “So I forgive you.” Turning to Sabrina’s headstone, I add, “Both of you. And it’s not because either of you deserve it. But I do. I don’t want to carry anger, resentment, or hatred around. I want my life to be as good and happy as it can be.”
Looking over my shoulder, I catch Raffaele’s eye and motion him over. He approaches with measured steps, his face solemn with respect for this moment. When he reaches me, he kneels beside me in the snow without hesitation, his arm sliding around my waist.
“Mom, this is Raffaele,” I say formally, though the absurdity of introducing my dead mom to the man she sold me to isn’t lost on me. “My husband. The man who saved me in more ways than I can count.”
Raffaele’s hand joins mine over my belly, warm and protective even through our gloves. “Nice to meet you again, Sophia,” he says softly. “Thank you so much for giving your daughter to me. She’s the best thing that ever happened to me, and I want you to know I love her very much.”
The simple sincerity in his voice brings fresh tears to my eyes. This dangerous man, this collector of debts and dealer of death, kneeling at my mom’s grave with such gentle respect.
“We’re naming the baby Bea if it’s a girl,” I tell my mom’s headstone, a decision I hadn’t even shared with Raffaele yet.
I feel him stiffen slightly beside me in surprise, then relax as he squeezes my hand.
“After his mom. But if you promise me to make Sabrina your plus one in heaven, I’ll consider Sophia for a middle name. ”
Immediately, the snow falls harder. It’s like each flake has multiplied by the hundreds in seconds.
“I think you have your answer,” Raffaele chuckles softly as he helps me to my feet, brushing snow from my coat with careful hands.
“I guess so,” I laugh. And it’s not a fake laugh. It’s… real and freeing.
“Are you ready to go home?” he asks, studying my face.
I take one last look at the grave, at the name of the woman who was both my greatest supporter and the keeper of my most devastating secret.
“Yes,” I say finally, turning into the warmth of my husband’s embrace. “I’m ready.”
As we walk away, his arm secure around my waist, I feel something shift inside me—not the baby moving, but something deeper. A weight lifting, a door closing on a chapter of my life that’s finally complete.
Ahead lies uncertainty, but also possibility. A future built on truth rather than secrets.
And that, I think as Raffaele opens the car door for me, is the greatest gift my mom’s confession has given me. The chance to start again, eyes wide open, with nothing hidden in the shadows.