Chapter 10 #3
“It’s there—just very high up.” Her gaze darkened. “Don’t change the subject just because you’re uncomfortable. Why didn’t you let someone else take care of Floyd’s office?”
“He was blackmailing me. I didn’t want any of my information to end up in someone else’s possession.”
“That’s bullshit.”
I brought my gaze level with hers. “Bullshit?”
“That’s right.” Bronwyn’s smile was unnerving. “You could’ve just grabbed your files and left the rest for someone else to deal with.” She continued smiling, really driving home the unsettling feeling.
I threw up my hands. “Fine. Yes, I felt a responsibility to my people. There were heinous things in there, Bronwyn. Things I wish I’d never seen.
Things that could hurt people who don’t deserve the pain.
I wanted—no, I needed—to make sure no one saw them but me.
I destroyed every file, every photo, every video, and I know it’s all gone, because I made sure of it. Me.”
The room went pin-drop silent.
“And I appreciate the coven offer, but I don’t want to take on another responsibility when I’m already drowning in them.”
Bronwyn sighed. “That’s the part you aren’t getting. You won’t be alone. You’ll have us.”
Margaux dropped back into her chair. “We’ll help with park protection and strengthen pack security spells. We’ll take on things like helping craft and deliver your charms and tinctures to the elderly shifters. When we’re connected, our power increases three-fold.”
“But if you get into trouble, I’m going to have the responsibility of saving you.”
There was that damn word again. Responsibility. I should paint a red R on my shirt and be done with it.
The witches laughed—no, cackled.
I narrowed my eyes. “You two are playing into a harmful stereotype.”
“Okay, so tell me this.” Bronwyn wiped her eyes with a clean tissue.
“What exactly were you doing a few months back when Margaux and I disappeared? You know, when you were most definitely not part of our coven?” Her gaze lasered into mine.
“Were you at home catching up on your garden shows, or were you busting your ass trying to track us down and save our lives?”
“The second,” I mumbled.
“When we were in trouble, you risked your life to save us. It didn’t matter that you hated our coven, because you cared about us,” Margaux said.
They were right, of course. It sucked, but they were right.
“You believe you’re more powerful than we are and therefore the responsibility for our safety rests on you, but when we’re bound by a coven, we’ll have more collective power to dip into. We’ll be stronger when together, but we’ll also each be stronger on our own.”
Margaux nodded. “We face the world with confidence knowing we have the magic of our coven sisters—siblings—running through our veins. The power comes with responsibility, yes, but it also comes with security.”
They were making a great deal of sense, and what was more, I felt a little stupid for not having realized it sooner.
Forming a coven with these witches would give them access to my power.
They’d have more tools to defend themselves and others when I wasn’t around. I couldn’t be everywhere, after all.
“Some of my reticence comes from fear.” My hands were shaking, so I weaved my fingers together to make them stop. “I’m afraid of what’s inside me. Afraid of … making it—myself—more powerful.”
The confession was, oddly, a little easier to admit this time around.
“…do you honestly think going it alone will help you find the answers? Maybe a coven is exactly what you need to keep your dark side in check.”
Ida’s words of wisdom inspired me to give the witches the rest of it.
I told Bronwyn and Margaux everything I was feeling about my witch, demon, and alpha leader abilities. All my shame, my fears, my worries.
You want me to delegate? Here comes an avalanche of anxiety, my witches.
When I finished, Margaux sat there, hands neatly folded in her lap. She’d listened without making any cracks about my being dense or willful.
“Thank you for sharing your pain with us,” she said solemnly.
“Thank you,” Bronwyn said.
My throat burned with that about-to-burst-into-tears ache. I didn’t trust myself to speak.
“If the worst happens, we can help you stay in control,” Bronwyn said, after a side look at Margaux, who nodded. “Joining our powers doesn’t diminish you or us in any way. Your problems are my problems are Margaux’s problems. We overcome them together.”
We could be dragged under together, too.
“I-I need to think it over.” I felt smaller, as if I’d sunk deeper into the chair, though the chair wasn’t that soft, and I hadn’t moved.
“Let’s meet in a day or so at your house, Betty. You can give us your decision then. I’m already on board, as you can plainly see.” Margaux rose, hands still clasped in front of her. “Bronwyn?”
“I’m on board, but I want to think about it, too.” She smiled, and this time, there was sadness in it. “After all, jumping into things without thinking them all the way through was how I ended up in The Org.”