Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“Daenae take me berries!” Louis cried out, swiping the ripe strawberry directly from Aurora’s fingertips before she could take a bite out of it.
“It was nae yers!” Aurora protested, immediately climbing to her knees so she could try to snatch back the fruit from her brother.
Emilie, who was seated next to the twins on a picnic blanket overlooking the sea, shook her head and chuckled.
“There are plenty of berries to go around,” she said good-naturedly, picking up the small basket that Catherine had sent them out with.
It was piled to the brim with the bright red fruit. Apparently, the market had been filled with them that morning. And, knowing that it was the twins’ favorite, the cook had come back with a heap of them.
It had been three days since the kiss. And two days since she’d played games with the children in the library.
She’d seen them every day since, the chasm between her and Aurora closing more and more each day. Most of the time now, it seemed like the girl might even like her.
“But I wanted that one,” Aurora protested, pointing a finger at the berry her brother was now taking bites of.
“Here,” Emilie said, setting the basket of strawberries down on the blanket and beginning to rifle through them. “We’ll look and find ye a big juicy berry. One even better than that one.”
Placated, Aurora scooted over by her, looking over Emilie’s shoulder as she searched through the berries until she found the perfect one.
“This one will be splendid,” Emilie chimed, plucking the berry out and extending it to Aurora.
The young girl took the fruit from Emilie’s slender fingers, turning it back and forth as she inspected it.
Despite the fact that Aurora had warmed up to Emilie greatly, there were still moments like this one, where Aurora still seemed skeptical of whatever her new mother was providing.
Eventually, though, she seemed to deem the berry worthy, and she brought it to her lips, happily chomping down on it as peace was restored.
Emilie smiled at the twins, happy to be spending time with them.
Aside from Catherine, the children were the only people with whom Emilie had interacted much in the last few days. She was woefully behind on her plans to force an annulment, and she knew that she couldn’t put off interacting with Archer for much longer.
But she’d been enjoying her time with the twins. And, if she was being honest with herself, she wasn’t entirely sure if she trusted her control if she was to find herself face to face with Archer again.
Memories of the kiss floated into her mind, almost as if it were happening all over again. She sighed, trying her best to push the images out of her mind, but they would not go.
Is it such a bad thing? To enjoy kissin’ yer own husband?
Immediately, her mind clamped down on the thought. Thoughts like these had been plaguing her since the kiss three days ago. Thoughts that tried to rationalize what had happened while they mingled with her guilt and shame, that kept her darting away from Archer and avoiding him at all costs.
“Emilie,” Aurora’s voice broke through her spiraling thoughts, and Emilie blinked rapidly.
Both twins were staring up at her. Their mouths were stained with berry juice, and she couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Yes, darlings,” Emilie asked, quickly producing a handkerchief for them to wipe themselves off with.
“We were wonderin’ if ye could read us a story?” Louis asked, pointing to the book that rested on the far corner of the picnic blanket.
Emilie nodded, immediately plucking the book from where it lay and opening it up to the first page.
The twins shifted across the blanket, nestling into Emilie on either side of her as she slowly began to read.
Emilie allowed the story to take hold of her, focusing on the words and bringing them to life for the two children curled up on either side of her. Making sure that her thoughts were far away from her husband, and any potential nefarious things that they could be getting up to.
She cannae keep ignorin’ me like this.
Archer grumbled under his own breath, careful that the sound didn’t carry to Marcus, who was working alongside him in the training yard.
There had been a large storm the night before, one that had sent a bolt of lightning crashing into their sparring ring. And, it had caused a big portion of the brick-lined barrier to fall.
He and Marcus had been out here for half a morning cleaning up the debris and repairing the wall. But now, they were laying their final layer of brick, and Archer’s mind had begun to wander.
“Ye’ve been quiet today, Arch,” Marcus mused, grabbing Archer’s attention.
They hadn’t spoken about the conversation they’d had the other night when Marcus and Paisly came into Archer’s study. If they had talked about it, then Archer would have had to admit that Emilie was still ignoring him.
After the first day following their kiss, Archer had been ready to hash it out with her. He had been ready to explain that a kiss like the one they’d previously shared could not happen again.
But he had not seen her at all.
The only time he’d been even vaguely aware of her presence had been late at night, when she crept into their bedroom long after he’d fallen asleep.
By the time she had crawled in next to him, Archer had been so exhausted and delirious with slumber, he’d barely been able to roll over to make room for her. Let alone have a conversation.
I’ll need to find her soon. I daenae want to keep livin’ like this.
“Nae a lot for me to say,” Archer grumbled, laying another brick and then smoothing the mortar over.
“Thinkin’ about yer wife again?”
Archer’s hand stopped moving, hovering in midair as he turned to glare over his shoulder at his man-at-arms.
Marcus’s tone had been joking. And, when Archer turned his gaze to him, Marcus’ mouth was tugged up in a wide, laughing grin. But Archer knew his best friend well enough to read the worry in his eyes and the concern that had buried itself deep within the lines of his face.
Archer shook his head, turning his attention back to the task at hand.
“I’ll nae be talkin’ about this again,” he ordered, hoping that for once Marcus would actually listen to him.
A silence permeated the space, one that wasn’t brought about by work. Archer could feel the weight of Marcus’s eyes on him and knew that his man-at-arms was watching him still.
Probably tryin’ to see if he can figure out the answer by the way I’m workin’.
He wanted to turn around and yell at Marcus, to demand that he stop looking at him and get back to work. But Archer knew that if he did that now, he would be all but confirming to Marcus that Archer was still plagued by what had happened between him and his wife.
A sigh sounded from behind him, one that reeked of resignation, and Archer had to fight the urge not to sigh at himself. Only, it would be a sigh of relief.
But the silence was short-lived.
“We’ll need to go into Thrums soon,” Marcus advised, “we need to check on the upcomin’ barrels.”
Archer grunted his agreement, laying the final brick and then sealing it. He sat back on his knees, turning to face his best friend.
“We’ll go in the next day or two,” he advised. “I have some other business I need to tend to in Thrums as well. I’ll let ye ken when to be ready.”
Marcus nodded but said nothing else.
The pair of them just looked at each other. Archer could tell that he wanted to say more, and before he could get the chance to, Archer pushed himself up off the ground and brought himself to a standing position.
He made a big show of dusting his hands off on his kilt.
“That’ll be enough, Marcus,” Archer said, making sure to allow his dismissal to seep into his tone.
But Marcus didn’t leave. He just kept looking at Archer. Studying him, even.
“Talk to her,” he said finally, seeming not to care that the topic was already serving to aggravate Archer.
“I daenae ken what ye’re talkin’ about,” Archer grumbled with a shake of his head, and Marcus let out an exasperated sigh.
“Look,” Marcus began, his words coming out of him in a rush. “I ken that ye daenae want to have a real marriage. Nae in the sense where ye are in love with yer wife.”
Archer opened his mouth, readying himself to tell his man-at-arms that it was not his place to bring up such things. But Marcus just raised his voice, continuing to speak and making it clear that he had no intention of stopping until he said what he felt he needed to.
“I’m fine with it, Arch, truly I am,” Marcus continued hastily. “Even Paisly is all right with it. Because we ken ye. We ken that whatever it is that ye’re doin’, ye’re doin’ it because ye think it’s the right thing.
But that doesnae mean that ye cannae at least be friends with the woman ye’ll be sharin’ a bed with for the rest of yer life.
Or, if nae friends, that ye cannae at least be friendly.
Ye daenae need to be stompin’ around here, glowerin’ at everyone that crosses yer path, and avoidin’ havin’ an actual conversation with her every moment ye get. ”
Archer growled. “I am nae the one who has been avoidin’ the conversation.”
Marcus blinked at him, cocking his head to the side. “Ye mean to tell me that ye’ve sought her out? That ye’ve tried to talk to her, and she has refused?”
Archer was quiet for a moment. He didn’t want to admit that, while he felt ready to have a conversation with Emilie, he hadn’t exactly gone out of his way to find her in the last two days.
More than once, the thought had flickered through his mind that it was better for him if she avoided him altogether. That the awkwardness would serve to keep a distance between them.
After all, Archer knew that he couldn’t be tempted to kiss her again if he wasn’t actually around her again.
Marcus, clearly reading the answer to what he’d just asked on Archer’s face, let out a chuckle, but there was no humor in the sound.
“I’m nae goin’ to tell ye what to do or how to navigate yer own marriage,” Marcus began, and then it was Archer’s turn to let out a joyless laugh.
“That would be the first time for that,” he chided.
Marcus just rolled his eyes and then continued.
“I’m nae goin’ to tell ye how to handle yer own marriage,” he repeated. “But just take what I said under advisement. As someone who cares for ye, it’s hard seein’ ye determined to always make yerself so miserable.”
Marcus didn’t wait for Archer to reply. He just dropped the tool he’d been using to lay the brick on the ground and turned away from him.
Archer stood in place, watching Marcus’ form disappear around the corner of the castle.
His thoughts were a jumbled mess, each one turning over the other, getting louder and louder so that Archer could not make out a single, individual thread of thought.
“I daenae want to stay here,” he grumbled out loud, the sound of his voice echoing off the stone of the training courtyard.
He threw the brick laying tool on the ground, vowing to himself that he’d send someone out to clean it all up later. And then, Archer started walking.
He had no idea where exactly he was heading, but he let his feet guide him. Hoping that if he moved enough, he would be able to avoid his own, ever spiraling mind.