Chapter 29
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
The windows of the castle were illuminated by the sparkling lights within, marking a spot in the distance for Archer to focus on.
He’d been on the back of his horse for hours, riding at a slow pace as he allowed his mind to consider everything that he needed against everything that he wanted.
When he’d first left Thrums, Archer had had every intention of heading directly to the castle. But he’d still been so worked up, still so caught up in his own mind, that he’d not known exactly what he was going to do.
Now, hours later, he was finally on his way home with a hollowness in his stomach.
“Me Laird, welcome home,” the steward called out as Archer reached the castle and guided his horse toward the doors.
“Has Marcus already returned?” he asked, sliding out of the saddle and turning to look at the steward.
“Aye, me Laird,” the man answered with a nod. “He returned quite a few hours ago. He did seem a bit worried that ye had nae yet returned.”
Archer nodded, turning to glare at the castle before him. Light painted the gravel beneath his feet in a warm glow, and it all looked so inviting. It was so at odds with the feeling that was roiling within him.
“And me wife? Do ye ken where she is?”
The steward cocked his head to the side. “Lady Emilie? I havenae seen her. If ye’d like, I could fetch one of the maids and have them find her for ye.”
Archer shook his head, starting to walk toward the entrance of his home.
“That willnae be necessary,” he growled. “I’ll find her.”
Leaving the steward to care for his horse and tuck it away in the stables, Archer headed for the door. The moment he was inside, he paused to listen.
It was well past supper time, so he was not surprised that a hush seemed to have fallen over the castle. But as much as he strained his ears, he could not hear any noise from any direction that might tell him where his wife was.
Might as well find the bairns first. If she’s anywhere, she’s most likely to be with them.
Archer made his way toward the twins’ playroom. He knew that she’d been spending most of the day with them in there, just like she always did when they didn’t have lessons.
But when Archer reached the room and peered in through the doorway, he found only Louis and Aurora within it.
They were hunched over a game of chess, the pair so absorbed in it that they didn’t notice their father peeking his head around the door. And they also didn’t notice when he dipped back out, turning away and walking back down the hall from where he’d come.
Where else would she be? Our chambers, mayhaps? The drawin’ room?
But as Archer went over and over in his mind what rooms she could possibly be in, he realized that there was one that would serve him well to check first.
The library.
Sure enough, the moment he stepped into the library, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that he’d chosen correctly. Through the stacks of books, he could see the glow of the fireplace, he could hear the turning of a page, and the sound of his wife humming to herself as she read.
Archer crept through the stacks, making his way toward where he knew he’d find her. She came into view a little quicker than he expected, sitting on one of the plush settees by the large window that overlooked the cliffs and the sea beyond.
It had been one of his favorite places in the castle for most of his life. And now, it would always be tainted by what he knew he was about to do.
Archer paused for a moment before he stepped from the shadow of the bookshelves, giving himself a spare moment to admire her.
She looked beautiful in that moment, her chestnut hair shining in the golden light of the fire.
Her cheeks were flushed, whether it was from the warmth of the fireplace or from the excitement of whatever she was reading, he didn’t know.
But whatever the reason, she looked lovely enough to steal his breath.
Ye daenae have to do this, he reminded himself, but he quickly silenced the thought.
After everything he’d experienced today, after realizing how quickly his thoughts and his actions could turn to darkness, he did have to do this. It would be the only thing that could guarantee her safety.
The only thing that could guarantee all of their safety.
With a quick, steadying breath, Archer stepped out into the firelight beyond.
Emilie’s eyes snapped up from the book, a startled expression on her face, before her gaze flickered with recognition.
“Ah,” she said, immediately beginning to relax as a smile started to light up her face. “It’s ye. I was wonderin’ when ye might be comin’ home. Ye missed supper.”
Archer nodded, not saying a word as he crossed the space to her.
Emilie shifted on the settee, sliding her feet off of it from where she’d curled up and making space for him. She looked up at him with a soft, inviting smile and patted the cushion next to her.
Archer’s heart gave a tug. He didn’t want to do this. But he fought against it, constantly reassuring himself that it was for the best.
“Is everythin’ all right?” Emilie asked, cocking her head to the side. “I went to find ye for supper tonight, and they said that ye’d gone to Thrums and that somethin’ had happened at the distillery.”
“Ye went to find me?” he asked, curiosity getting the better of him.
Emilie dipped her chin, glancing at the book in her lap while a bashful look played across her face.
“Aye,” she answered. “I think I’ve been ignorin’ ye for long enough, daenae ye think?”
Her gaze flicked up, staring at him through her dark lashes, and Archer fought the urge to groan.
Why did she have to do this now? Right when he’d decided what he needed to do? Why was she suddenly seeming like she wanted to be with him? Why did she decide now that she was done ignoring him?
“It’s nothin’ that I cannae handle,” he growled, willing hardness into his voice.
“I’m certain there’s nae much that ye cannae handle,” Emilie said gently.
She looked expectantly at the spot beside her again, the one where she’d just made space for him that he had not yet claimed. But Archer just gave her a quick, terse shake of the head.
“I’ll nae be sittin’,” he informed her. “This shouldnae take long.”
A confused look flickered across his wife’s face, but it wasn’t something he allowed himself to stew on. It would be better for everyone involved for him to get this over with soon.
“I ken what ye’ve been up to,” Archer began, his words imbued with ice. “I ken that ye’ve been tryin’ to annoy me. And, at first I couldnae figure out why. But I think I have, now.”
Emilie’s mouth popped open in surprise, clearly shocked to have him speaking so plainly about the plot that he’d uncovered.
“Ye’ve been playin’ dumb so that I would give ye an annulment, is that correct?”
She began to sputter, shaking her head as protests fell from her lips. But she couldn’t finish an entire thought, her words all jumbling over each other in an unintelligible mish-mash that Archer couldn’t entirely make sense of.
When he’d finally had enough of seeing her struggle, Archer held up a hand, effectively silencing Emilie.
“I daenae ken what ye’re talkin’ about,” she said finally, the first truly coherent sentence she’d spoken in the last few moments.
Archer stared at her hard, not allowing the ice that he’d constructed around himself to melt. If he did, he wouldn’t go through with this, so he imagined the ice coating himself all over again, holding that coldness close and latching onto it.
“Ye daenae need to pretend anymore,” Archer growled. “Because I’ve figured it all out. And I plan on givin’ ye what ye want. The annulment is yers.”
He had thought that he’d seen relief in her eyes, so when instead she jumped up and immediately began to argue, he was shocked.
“What do ye mean ye’re givin’ me an annulment?” she hurled, fired up in that way that he always found so incredibly attractive. “We’re married. And ye’ve… done things to me. Things that I ken would be a sin if I were to do them with anyone else. Ye cannae go annulin’ our marriage. Nae now.”
“Is that nae what ye want?” he asked, keeping his tone even.
Emilie stared at him, her chest heaving as she stood before him. A few moments ticked by, and the only sound to be heard was the crackling of the fireplace in the corner of the room.
Finally, something within her seemed to deflate, and Emilie’s head began to dip.
“It is what I wanted at first,” she admitted, blue eyes shining in the flickering light of the fire. “I willnae lie to ye about that, nae anymore. Ye seem to want the truth, so I’ll give it to ye. All of it.”
She took a deep breath, clearly trying to draw in the strength to continue with the conversation. Archer knew that he should stop her, that it would be unkind to allow the conversation to continue any further, especially since his mind was already made up.
There was nothing that Emilie could say, do, or promise that would get him to change his mind.
But that fact didn’t quell the curiosity now twining through him.
I can hear what she has to say, even if I ken that it willnae change me mind. Mayhaps it will help to ken the truth, after all this is said and done.
When Emilie began to speak again, her voice was steady and sure.
“I did want an annulment at first,” she explained evenly. “So, aye, I noticed how much ye seemed to be driven mad by foolishness, so I decided to play the fool. I thought that ye wouldnae allow yer children to be raised by someone daft, and that ye’d send me back to the abbey.”
Even though Archer had already worked it all out for himself, the words still stung. His first wife, the twins’ mother, had hated being married to him. She had told him as much on her deathbed.
And all of that came rushing back to him now, knowing how much Emilie had clearly hated being married to him as well.
It’s me. The problem has always been with me. I am the rot that ruins me marriage, I am the rot that ruins me family. Just like me faither was.
“But I daenae want that now, Archer.”
Emilie’s words caught him off guard, and Archer blinked rapidly, trying to make sense of what she’d just said. Seeming to take his brief moment of confusion as encouragement, a soft smile tugged up the corner of Emilie’s lips, and she stepped forward.
Her hand jutted toward Archer, grabbing Archer’s own and lacing their fingers together.
“I daenae want to go to the abbey,” she repeated. “I daenae want to be anywhere but here. With ye, and with the bairns. I’ve grown to love them, ye see. The twins.”
Archer nodded. That much he could understand. Even from a distance, he knew that his children were extraordinary.
Despite everything life had thrown at him, Louis was kind and funny and inquisitive.
And Aurora? Aurora was a force of nature as wild as the sea. With a fierce drive to protect the people she loved.
It was no surprise to him that someone had come to love them. He loved them, too, in his own way. It’s why he made it a point to stay as far away as he did.
“And I think,” Emilie continued, seemingly unaware of the turmoil raging deep within Archer, “that mayhaps, with a bit of time, I might come to love ye, too.”
Ice flooded his veins, all doubt and all feelings of understanding that had just been coursing through him driven out entirely.
Archer stepped back, dropping Emilie’s hand and sending it falling to her side. He shook his head.
“Nay,” he said gruffly. “I will hear nay more of this.”
A look of hurt flickered across her lovely features, but Archer paid it no mind. He couldn’t care that she was hurt right now.
What she’d just said, that with time she could come to love him? That was more dangerous than anything that she could have admitted to him.
Because if she believed that she could love him, that meant she would want to try. She would want to get close to him. She would want to be a wife to him. A real wife.
And that was not something that Archer could allow.
“Me decision is final,” he hissed, putting as much steel into his voice as he possibly could, letting her know that there was no room for arguments. “Ye will be leavin’ for the abbey tonight. So, pack yer things.”
Archer made to turn around, sure that she would allow him to walk out the door. But the moment that he spun, he heard her trotting along after him seconds before she felt her hand clamp down on his arm.
“Daenae do this,” she argued.
There wasn’t pleading in her voice. Instead, it was filled with a determined resolution. She wanted to convince him to let her stay. That much was clear.
But Archer would not be swayed. No matter how much he wanted to continue being with her.
He wrenched his arm back from her, taking several steps away. Emilie’s eyes shone with hurt, but Archer would not allow himself to focus on that.
“It’s done,” he said gruffly. “Pack yer things. Someone will be takin’ ye back to the abbey soon.”
Archer did not spare another moment as he turned and walked out of the library, leaving Emilie staring after him.