Marian
The plane ride to Chicago was practically silent.
Aside from a few questions from Quinton, no one really said a thing.
And maybe it’s because we all knew how bad this was going to be.
Worst case scenarios looped in my mind. I wanted this to go smoothly.
It would be hard to face Drayton’s family, but so long as no one said or did anything over the top, it would be fine.
I could handle dirty looks. I could even withstand name-calling.
But my fear wasn’t for me, it was for my husband.
His emotions were up and down. He’d start to fall asleep, only to jerk awake.
He was irritable. Restless. But loving. I feared there could be a bomb waiting to go off inside of Drayton, and I wasn’t sure how much it would take to detonate it.
All that anger he’d had before had to be going somewhere, right?
What if it came out towards his family? What if it came out at me?
Was it too much to hope it had just vanished?
I was never that lucky. With the way he kept jumping onto his phone to replay the footage of the video evidence, I just wasn’t sure what to expect.
“My brother just texted me.”
Drayton’s lids had been growing heavy again, but he hit pause, looking up at Quinton. We were in the back of the Pennington’s luxury SUV as the driver drove us to the estate, and even with how spacious the interior was, the men’s dominating build made me feel trapped.
“Which one?”
“Christian. We haven’t talked since I left to stay with you in Hollywood. He’s at the estate with my parents. Dray, this isn’t looking good.”
Drayton’s face only hardened even more.
“There’s nothing they can do. They can challenge the decision all they want, but they won’t get anywhere with it.”
“What did he say?”
Both men looked at me at the question. Quinton peered back down at his phone, turning it to face us.
Christian: Word’s out that you’re in town and that you’re Drayton’s shadow. Why am I not surprised? The cousins are meeting at the estate. Me, mom, and dad, are already here. I can’t believe it.”
“Oh…” I looked between them. “How does that sound bad? I mean, he didn’t necessarily say anything negative. And it’s normal for family to support a transition in title. Is it possible we’re just defensive and expecting the worst?”
“It’s possible.” Quinton nodded. “I don’t know what to expect from any of them. I do know they’re not going to be celebrating our arrival. I didn’t leave on good terms. Neither did Dray.” His eyes went over to Drayton. “Unless something happened, and you know something I don’t.”
Drayton’s head shook, and he stayed silent, yawning.
The miles flew by while I prayed for any sort of escape.
Escape from the SUV. Escape from reality.
If Drayton watched that video enough, would he notice my mother’s stare?
Would he hear how manipulative her words were and somehow link them to me?
Guilt. I was drowning in guilt for reasons I couldn’t even prove.
I gave him big, sad, love-me eyes. That meant nothing.
I was good with my words. I wasn’t her or Elec.
I didn’t have special training. It didn’t matter.
I felt sick over what could be, and the last thing I wanted to see was the video.
I was too afraid to see my mother in that state. I was afraid I’d see her in myself.
Shame had me twisting my fingers in the bottom of my ivory, cashmere sweater.
I should have taken off my half trench, but I couldn’t bear to be free of the weight.
With how smothered I felt, I should have wanted to be free of all constraints, but that wasn’t the case.
I wanted them to bury me. I deserved that.
And soon, I’d be left without a choice. Their pain would be projected right where it deserved to be, and I would burn.
Despite being a victim. Despite them possibly already knowing it wasn’t my fault, I couldn’t help but feel that I deserved this.
I deserved the humiliation. The pain it would cause.
The absolute decimation to what was left of me.
I told Drayton I needed the traditional ways. What I needed was the reset—a complete brain bleach. Or maybe that came from healing. Could you heal from a lifetime of manipulation? From real evil?
Drayton grabbed my hand, pulling me from my thoughts.
I looked over, seeing uncertainty on his face.
This wasn’t a small battle he was going into as heir.
Death. It was the most extreme possibility, but it wasn’t ever impossible.
He killed one of his own, even if it was on accident.
Where once his price as The Devil might have eased the pain, him regaining his power could be seen as injustice. Or worse.
Shame. It only increased as I turned more in his direction. Drayton needed me. I needed him.
“It’s going to be okay. Look into my eyes and hear every word I say,” I breathed out, willing my expression to change into power.
Into her. “You are heir. You were made for this, and it was robbed from you. The woman who did that is dead. She hurt a lot of people, including both of us, but together we’re returning you where you’re meant to be.
We will make your family stronger than ever.
Together, we’ll show them what it means to rule.
You’re ready for this, Drayton. No one can take care of this family better than you.
Say it,” I said, grabbing to his forearms. “No one is better for this than you.”
“No one,” he breathed out, staring back intently. “No one. I’m the true heir.”
“Yes, you are.”
Drayton pulled me in, pushing his fingers through my hair as he kissed me. I held tighter to his arms, but it was Quinn who drew us from our kiss.
“I told you. I fucking told you she was it for us. She’s right, but so was I. She was made to be a Pennington. She understands what it takes. I could see it, Dray. I could feel it.”
Drayton’s gaze went between us. His fingers tightened in my hair just enough to quickly kiss me and pull back.
“Thank you. Here you are comforting me, and I should be the one reassuring you.”
“You don’t have too.” I forced a weak smile. “I know what’s coming. It’s okay. I’m the source of this, no matter the cause. They won’t be able to see it any other way. I accept that.”
“I don’t.” Drayton wrapped his arm around me, pulling me in to hold. “I set the tone, not them.”
“You set it; I’ll enforce it.” Quinn adjusted in the captain’s chair. “We won’t let anyone disrespect you, Marian. You heard Elec. You were innocent. I saw the video, and it’s disgusting what she made you do, but that was all her. You didn’t say those things willingly.”
I nodded but couldn’t speak. I held to Drayton, closing my lids as the driver gave us a five-minute warning.
My stomach twisted, and I turned, letting the weakness in me out as I buried my face in Drayton’s chest. For the briefest moment I was hidden by his opened coat.
His cologne stole me, putting me right back in the bookstore.
Right back into our first kiss, and I stayed there, kissing him. Loving him.
“Head up, doll.”
I lifted, forcing the fear back. Green eyes were hard, but they didn’t steal the love Drayton had for me, even if it was prisoner to the anger still lurking in the shadows.
“Quinn will get out first. My family will take their spots, if they’re not already there. Then, me. And then you.”
My mouth parted. “I’m supposed to go before you. You’re the heir. You go last.”
“Not today.”
“But—”
“Not today, Marian.”
“Drayton, please. Anything out of the norm might—”
At his hard look, I nodded, lowering my expression, but letting it bounce to Quinton.
I knew what Drayton was doing, but I couldn’t breathe through the thought of how high he was putting me above him.
He wanted to show his family that even from the beginning of this, he was choosing us over what he’d been gifted with again.
That he put me above his title. Above him and all of their ranks.
How could a show of endearment be both wonderful and defeating all at once?
Shame.
Guilt.
Embarrassment.
The past was harder to face than torture. I would have cut a million more bodies apart if it meant bypassing having to look at my new in-laws after destroying them and their son.
We pulled into the long, winding path of the estate, and I found my mouth opening just so I could breathe. I was trembling. I felt sick.
“You don’t leave my side, Marian. Not for anything. If someone wants to say anything to you, they’ll do it in front of me. I won’t have them preying on you the moment you’re alone.”
“I have to be alone at some point.”
“That’s debatable.”
I laughed, not even sure why. It had Drayton’s arms pulling me in as he softened around me.
“You laugh, but I’m serious. I still don’t believe you’re here.
I don’t believe this is our life. If you think I’m going to risk losing this, you have another thing coming.
I don’t know these people anymore. I don’t trust them.
They turned their backs on me long before Delia.
Before— They didn’t even give me the benefit of the doubt.
They didn’t want to listen to my side of what happened.
To turn their back so easily on their son.
No… you’ll be with me at all times. If for some reason we’re not together, I won’t leave you alone. “Especially not now.”
Drayton didn’t have to elaborate. The threat was real for both of us, and it went far beyond ugly names or accusations.
“I won’t leave your side. I promise.”
“Not even if they appear welcoming,” Drayton stressed. “Not even if they’re nice or persuasive. Never.”
His fear was real. His words were a warning he didn’t have to speak. It had me slowly nodding up as I looked into his depths.
“Never. The same goes for you. No conversation is too important or private to have without me. If you protect me; I protect you. And if they want one of us dead, they have to kill us both.”
“What am I, chopped liver? Hello, I’m the damn shadow. If y’all die, I die. Talk about overlooked and unappreciated. Sheesh.”
Quinton winked, and I couldn’t help but laugh as I reached for his hand. It was a thanks. A vow that went much deeper than words. It was an acknowledgement of the bond between all three of us. We were in this new life together, and what affected one would affect all.
To the death.” I squeezed against his fingers, feeling Drayton put his hand over ours.
“To the death,” they repeated.