CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX #2
He inhaled deeply and slowly released it along with the tension in his shoulders as his breath ruffled the stray hairs framing my face. “Yes… and no. Now, what do you plan to do when you return to the Deep?”
“That’s not important—”
“I beg to differ, little mermaid. You nearly died trying to get home. I want to know why you’re so desperate to return to a place where you’re clearly not welcome.”
“I want to clear my name.”
He canted his head as he assessed me. “While I believe that’s true, it’s not the only reason, is it? There’s something deeper and darker than that… something so visceral that you’d risk your life just to claim it.”
I notched my chin higher as I met his gaze.
“I want to kill him,” I said plainly, as though the mere thought of it didn't send the flames of revenge burning through my body.
“I want to hunt him down and tear out his heart as he did mine, then watch the life fade from his eyes with a look of satisfaction on my face.”
A wicked smile of approval tugged at his lips. “Even years later, your vengeance burns so bright...”
A statement, not a question, but I answered it anyway.
“Finn took everything from me, and I want to return the favor.” That same fleeting darkness shone in his eyes before disappearing as quickly as it had come. “This power of yours,” I said, choosing my words carefully, “it doesn’t seem natural. Have you always had it?”
His lips pressed to a thin line. “No.”
“These one-word answers are getting a tad tedious, Yael—”
“If you knew you couldn’t get the revenge you seek,” he interrupted, diving right into his next question and ignoring my objection, “would that change your plan?”
“No.”
“No?” he asked, flinching with surprise. “Why not?”
“It’s not your turn to ask a—”
“Why not?” he asked again, pressing closer to me. “There are people here that care about you. People who love you. Why would you risk all that for nothing?”
“Because I’d rather die for one last swim in the sea and the feel of my tail slicing through the water than rot in the Devil’s Playground for a lifetime.
Maybe you think that’s selfish and can’t understand because you only had to slum it here for a couple weeks, but for some of us, being relegated to this place is a life sentence—and I, for one, don’t plan to serve it willingly. ”
Something dangerously close to hurt softened his expression just before his features went tight with anger and his body coiled as though preparing for a fight. “You may live to regret that statement for more reasons than you could possibly know.”
“Or I won’t live at all,” I argued, holding my ground. “Hell, I probably won’t survive here much longer at this rate, but once you have your sister back, I won’t be your concern anymore, will I?”
He looked me over for a moment, eyes narrowed with anger. “I think you’re very much my concern.”
“Next question,” I said softly. “When that other side of you comes out… am I in danger?”
He stared at me in silence while a montage of emotions played out on his face.
Hurt, concern, and anger slowly bled together as his body went utterly rigid, and I wondered if he was fighting back the ‘evil’ because I’d angered it with my question.
“I don’t know,” he finally said, his voice low and teeming with warning.
“And I think we’re all done with the Q I was wound up after everything that had gone down, but I had no intention of admitting that to him, for more reasons than I could count.
And letting him go forward with this proposition?
That seemed far more dangerous than anything else I’d faced in the last twenty-four hours.
“Should we test my theory?”
“And how exactly do you propose we do that?” I asked, trying to steady my breath. “Let you try to ‘unravel’ me by sex-talking me to death?”
“Something to that effect—without the dying bit, of course.”
“If you fail, I’ll have been forced to indulge this bizarre idea, and if by some small miracle you succeed, your gloating will be intolerable,” I argued while he looked on with a lustful stare. “There’s really nothing in it for me.”
That piercing stare slowly raked over my body, and it felt as though it were stripping me bare in its wake. “Oh, I think there’s most definitely something in it for you,” he said, his voice low and thick and full of temptation. “And you’d thank me for it in the end.”
I took a step back as heat built somewhere deep in my belly, and he followed my retreat with predatory grace. “I’m afraid your ego could never survive the inevitable failure, Yael,” I said in a less than convincing tone
A wicked smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “I don’t think it’s my ego that’s in jeopardy here, love… but that precious virtue of yours might be in trouble.”
The thought of what he was offering awakened a part of me, deep in the shadows of my mind, I thought had died long ago.
Along with it came a curiosity I fought hard to resist, and something far more frightening and dangerous; a need so blinding that I feared what would happen if it was fully unleashed.
One I’d stuffed away for years along with the hurt and betrayal I hadn’t wanted to face.
But standing face to face with Yael’s lazy smile and hooded eyes full of promise, that need grew fiery and bold and difficult to control, which was a perilous combination amid our battle of wills.
Because, regardless of the way he was looking at me, I knew damn well that, in the end, this was only a game to him.
And I wasn’t so sure it was to me anymore.
“I don’t want to alarm you, but my virtue has long since jumped ship,” I said, my gaze dropping to his soft, full lips, wondering what they’d feel like trapped between my teeth.
“I wonder how long before your control follows suit.” I allowed my eyes to drift lower, following the harsh cut of his abs past the waist of those low-hanging pants to the poorly concealed erection growing just beyond.
“You look tense, Yael,” I said as I leveled my eyes on his.
“Maybe you’re the one who needs a little unraveling. ”
“Are you offering your assistance in the matter, little mermaid?”
“Do you want me to offer my assistance?”
“Do you want me to want you to?”
“I want you to answer the question.”
“You want answers,” he said, moving closer still, “and I want you to lie down.” The gravel in his voice when he spoke those words awakened every nerve in my body and overrode my rational thought.
He pressed forward, backing me to the edge of the bed until I had no choice but to either sit or plaster my body against his naked chest. The mattress was forgiving when I dropped down onto it, my legs dangling as I looked up into his hungry stare.
“That looks a lot like sitting, not lying down.”
“Because I haven’t agreed to indulge your fantasy just yet.”
“My fantasy?” he said, mischief gleaming in his evergreen stare.
“Perhaps I didn’t make the goal of this exercise clear, love…
” Leaning over to place a hand at my side, he slid a knee onto the bed to cage me against the mattress, leaving us nearly nose to nose.
“Tell me something, Myra: do you always have to do things the hard way?” My heart raced in my chest as he lingered, awaiting my answer, the faint smell of rosemary and mint from his soap further clouding my senses.
“Is that an actual question or rhetorical?”
“It would be moot altogether if you would lie. Down.”
I bit my lip as I contemplated my answer. “And if I don’t?”
His wide eyes dropped to my mouth, then narrowed as they returned to my face. “Then perhaps I’ll have to show you what the hard way looks like…”
Something about that playful threat sent an echo of excitement through my veins. Doing this precarious dance with him was like playing with fire—except I wondered if I wasn’t purposely trying to get burned. “I don’t think you will.”
“And I don’t think I'll have to.”
He pulled away enough for me to see the victory in his hungry gaze as it raked over my body.
I leaned forward, preparing to get the last word, and was met with his index finger pressed tightly to my lips.
“Careful, now, love… open that mouth again to argue with me and I’ll find something to stuff it with.
” A fiery ache burned between my legs as my brain warred with my body.
His evergreen eyes held the promise of pleasure and pain, and in that moment, I had no doubt that he could unravel me as he’d said he would.
Against my better judgment, I was tempted to let him, if for no other reason than to quell the throbbing between my thighs.
But it was the inevitable pain that would follow that held me at bay.
Yael’s presence was all-consuming when he exuded that much intensity—when he was that close—and it would be easy to fall head-first into such a heady trap.
But I’d done that once before, and it had nearly cost me my life.
Getting close to him in any capacity was a risky endeavor at best; getting closer than I already was seemed nothing shy of madness.
“So, what will it be?” he asked, brushing my hair over my shoulder before letting his fingers trail lightly along my exposed neck. “Are you in or out?” My hesitation seemed to inspire the same in him, and his hand went still. “You can trust me, Myra...”
“But I don’t trust anyone,” I countered, my soft, breathy voice sounding anything but convincing.
He looked me dead in the eyes with an earnestness that shocked me to my core. “Then maybe it’s time you try again.”
Those words cut through the fog of lust clouding my mind to settle upon it; I couldn’t seem to shake the hint of truth they held, no matter how hard I tried.
I’d spent years keeping my distance from those around me, never letting anyone but Ravi get too close.
But my well-forged defenses seemed to be collapsing as of late, and I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe that wasn’t as dangerous as I feared.
To let people close. To trust once again.
But the longer I stared at Yael, his breath held and expression tight with anticipation, the more I saw Finn and his deceitful countenance looking back.
I pulled away and narrowed my eyes at him. “And maybe it’s time for me to be done here.”
“Myra—”
“It was a nice try, Yael,” I said, cutting him off, “really, it was. Very convincing. But the reality is that I’m going to go sleep on that new couch of yours, and you and that situation in your pants are going to be in for a long, lonely night.
But don’t worry; I’m sure it’s nothing that five minutes and a bottle of lotion can’t solve for you.
” I slipped off the bed, grabbed a pillow and a blanket, and headed for the door.
“I think I’ll go have that shower you suggested earlier before I go to bed,” I said over my shoulder as I hurried down the hall.
“Have fun with the consequences of your stupid innuendo.”
“And you have fun in that shower,” he called after me as I walked away. “I recommend making it a cold one.”
My middle finger in the air was my only response before I disappeared into the bathroom, leaving him alone with a raging erection and the knowledge that he only had himself to blame for it.