Chapter 18
YELENA
At first, I just stood there stunned and frozen and unable to move when I realized the man walking around the corner of Elvira’s Café was fucking Kyle.
I’ve tried to push it out of my head that he’s still so close to Knightsblood. I’ve avoided even going near that block where his satellite office is, just in case.
Honestly, I’ve avoided Hawthorne Hollow in general so far this semester because of that fucking monster. Which is another reason to hate him. I used to love coming down here with my friends and getting ice cream by the waterfront.
It’s that hate that had me blurting out “I haven’t forgotten what you did to me” and pulling his attention from his phone.
I could have…should have…just kept walking. He hadn’t even noticed me until I said that.
I’ve only crossed paths with the asshole once since it happened.
It was two weeks afterward, and I finally forced myself to stop pretending I had a head cold and leave my room at my parents’ house.
I worked up my courage, went down to Kyle’s office in Manhattan, and marched into his private corner suite to tell him I was going to tell people what he did, and make sure he went to prison.
“For what?”
Those two words said with a sickly smooth smile were all it took to destroy my plans of vengeance.
After that, he ran what I know now is the abuser’s playbook.
I’d been giving conflicting signals.
I wanted it.
I was misremembering.
I was drunk, and the restaurant could confirm that.
I was embarrassed because I’d peed on his floor, so I ran off.
Whatever else he said in his office that day is a blur. All I know is, after I left I realized I had nothing to go on in terms of “accusing him”. I also had nothing to gain, and everything to lose.
So I stayed quiet.
Buried it.
And the exact same conversation just played out here again in the dark parking lot next to Elvira’s.
“I haven’t forgotten what you did to me.”
He looks up from his phone and smiles in recognition.
“What did I do to you, Yelena? Take you out on a date?”
“You assaulted me. You tried to rape me.”
“Did I?”
“YES.”
“So why aren't I in jail?” He smiles again. “Ah, maybe it’s because you haven’t told anyone. Because you're not actually a victim.”
My brain short-circuits at his audacity. Then I freeze when he steps closer.
“You know what I think?” he murmurs. “I think you like having this between us. It’s why you can’t let it go.”
My jaw tightens. “Fuck you,” I whisper hoarsely.
The fucker is still smiling. “You willingly came to that dinner that night, Yelena. So eagerly, too.”
I feel sick. Not because there's any truth to it, but because I recognize it as a thing abusers say. Knowing that doesn't make it any less nauseating, though.
He sighs, like he’s annoyed. “I know you're still thinking about that night. About me. Maybe that's why you're still here talking to me.”
I SHOULD be walking away. Better yet, running. But my feet won’t move, and part of that is because I know I’m alone with a predator.
Not a hunter like Achilles.
A predator.
And you don't turn your back on one of those.
He sighs and lifts a shoulder. “Don’t come here looking for me again, Yelena. You and I have nothing more to talk about, and this conversation is over.”
When he’s gone, I close my eyes as I draw in a haggard breath, trying to shake off the rage and fear and shame.
I hate how helpless this asshole makes me feel. How pathetic. How weak. Worse, I’d finally come up with that plan to leave murder evidence in his old room at Kingsward…and nothing came of it.
No police response. No Kyle in jail.
That just makes me feel even less a De Luca and more a victim. I hate that.
There has to be another way to get him.
You could always tell your father…
My jaw tightens. Yes, I could. And if I did, you could count Kyle’s life expectancy in minutes. But I’m not going to.
Because if I tell anyone, I really do become a victim. Someone to feel sorry for. A sad, cautionary tale.
Worse, to my parents, I'd become broken. I know it wouldn’t change their love for me at all. I know they’d still support me and love me as hard as they could. But I know I’d become something else to them.
Even though they had nothing to do with what happened, I know they’d blame themselves for it, and I’d spend the rest of my life trying to convince them they didn’t let me down.
I’m not doing that to them or to myself.
So, no telling Dad, as elegant a solution as that would be. But there has to be something I can do. Some way I can get to that motherfucker and—
A sound behind me yanks me out of my thoughts of revenge, and I whirl with a sharp gasp.
But there’s nothing there.
I shiver, clutching the bag of saltwater taffy that I got at the candy shop around the corner because Arianna loves it and couldn’t come to town tonight because she had a paper to write.
Then I quickly walk out of the dim parking lot, rushing around the corner of the next building.
I spot my friends up ahead, and I take another shaky breath, trying to purge the Kyle encounter from my system.
It’s in the past.
Fuck him.
He doesn’t own you.
Instead, I replay what happened the other night in my room.
With Achilles.
A heated flush creeps up my neck as I run up behind Galina, Wren, and Lucia.
“Of course she is,” Galina laughs. “I’m not saying that to be a bitch, I just … I mean, c’mon, it’s Arianna.”
I cock a brow as I butt in. “What are we talking about?”
“Hey!” Wren whirls in surprise. “Where the hell did you just come from?”
I smile sheepishly and hold up the bag of saltwater taffy. “Ari’s favorite.”
“Aww, you’re the sweetest,” Lucia sighs.
Wren rolls her eyes. “Dude, you've already won the best friend in history award for taking care of my drunk ass all the time.”
I hug her and offer them all some of the candy—I mean, I got plenty.
“Wait, so what about Arianna?”
Galina shrugs. “She’s a virgin.”
I snort. “Are we in an 80’s teen movie?”
They all crack up.
Wren giggles. “You’re so on the nose it’s hilarious. While you were at the candy store, we walked by the Elm Theater. They’re doing an 80’s horror movie marathon soon, and the first one is “Camp Moon Virgin Slayer”.
I throw my head back and laugh.
“That’s how it came up,” Galina sighs. "We've been talking who's done it."
I grin. “And…survey says?” I glance at Wren. “I mean, you I know about.”
She sighs. “Yeah, unfortunately, that card got punched by dickhead.”
Aka Bryce, her ex.
“And it sucked, too.”
“Heard,” Lucia grumbles, raising her hand. “Also guilty. A couple times, with my high school boyfriend.” She scowls and holds up her thumb and forefinger half an inch apart. “Not much to write home about,” she sighs. We all giggle.
“I got close,” Galina snorts. “If you count him blowing in his pants and then not being able to get it up again the two times we tried as getting close.”
I wince. “Oof.”
Galina raises her brows. “No shit. Also, the logistics involved in sneaking out of the house to go meet a boy under the ever-present gazes of both Dad and Papa, twice, is a superhuman feat. To do it just to get cum stains on my skirt when it leaked through his jeans feels like getting kicked in the shins.”
The rest of us erupt in laughter.
“Ari being a virgin still seems so weird to me,” Lucia says, shaking her head. “I mean, her parents operate a literal kink club.”
I shrug. “Eh, I think it’s just a reaction to what her parents do. I mean, she says they keep work and home super separated, but still… If your parents run a place like that… I think I can see why Ari’s usually in jeans or sweatpants and doesn’t really have much of an interest in sex.”
Wren nods. “For sure.” She lifts her gaze to me. “And unless there's something you’ve neglected to tell your best friend in the world…you’re still…?”
Heat creeps up my neck into my cheeks. My mind instantly revisits the other night, with a very naked, very muscled, very fucking HUGE Achilles sliding into bed behind me.
Grabbing my throat and hips.
Gliding his thick cock back and forth against my pussy until I shattered.
And then covering me with his cum before flipping a switch back on inside me that I thought would remain in the “off” position forever.
I didn’t just “agree” to give him head. It’s not even just that I “wanted” to.
It’s that I fucking wanted to.
I wanted my mouth on his cock like someone lost in the desert wants water. I don't know if it was the alcohol, or the rush of endorphins because he'd just made me come, or the knowledge that Wren was in the next room.
But when he slid his hand into my hair and told me to open my mouth, I wanted to give him the sort of head he’d wake up dreaming about.
No idea if I came close, given that I’d only given one blowjob before that, but I hope so.
“Uh…Lena??”
I blink. Wren is staring at me with a hungry, prying look on her face.
“Oh! No!” I laugh nervously. “No, no change there.”
She arches her brow. “She says, after a long, weighty, blushing silence.”
I roll my eyes. “No change. Still a virgin.”
Lucia shrugs. “Waiting for the right guy?”
“Waiting for a prince, obviously,” Galina sighs. “To sweep her off her feet before bedding her on a cushion of silk and roses.”
I snort and flip her off. “It’s not that.”
Galina laughs. “Suit yourself. It’s what I’m waiting for, thank you very much.”
“Respect,” Wren sighs. “And go for an older man. Boys fucking suck.”
“Right?” Lucia groans. “Maybe someone like Dominic Hale.”
I almost choke as I start laughing. “As in Father Hale?”
Aka the sinfully hot pastor at St. Aldric’s on campus.
Lucia grins and blushes. “Well, obviously without the whole celibacy thing! I just mean someone older, hot, knows what they’re doing?”
“The girl gets it,” Wren nods.
Galina laughs. “You think a priest who, you know, isn't allowed to have sex knows what he’s doing?”
Lucia groans. “You’re taking it too literally. I just mean… He’s fucking hot.”
“Well, there you go, Lena,” Wren grins. “Just go fall in love with Father Hale and convince him to leave the priesthood. Easy!”
I laugh, then my brow furrows. “I’m not waiting for love, you know.”
I’m really not. And that’s not because of Kyle.
I’ve always thought of sex and love as being two separate things. They obviously can be both, in a perfect world. Gross as it is to think about my parents that way, I know that’s what they have.
The wild, untamed sex life and the storybook romance.
But what the hell are the odds of finding that?
Galina arches a brow. “You’re saying you could just go out and bang a rando?” She shakes her head. “No judgement, but…” She shrugs. “I don’t know if I could? I mean I’ve thought about it, but I don’t think it would be for me.”
I shake my head. “Oh, me neither. I’d need to trust them. It wouldn’t be some stranger I met the night of. At least… I doubt it.”
This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot recently, specifically as it pertains to Achilles.
I’m not "in love" with him, and I doubt his stalkerish hunting of me has anything to do with love, either.
But I already have love in my life, in the shape of my parents and my brother. These girls.
I’ve gone my whole life thinking that love and sex can live in two different boxes. I have family and friends to fill the first one.
And now, I have Achilles to fill the second.
Even though we haven’t had sex yet…
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the million-dollar question taking up the entirety of my thoughts, constantly.
“When I take this virgin pussy for the first time, your pulse will be racing much faster than this. You’ll be sweating, and out of breath. You’ll be my prey when your virgin blood soaks my cock, baby.”
I mean, firstly, holy fuck. But also…dare I say…hell yes?
Weirdly, I do trust Achilles. I know that he’d push me to my limits, maybe even past them, and do things to me I’ve only read and fantasized about. But I also trust that he'd stop if I said the word.
Thunder.
In fact, that’s what he’s been firmest about: one word stops the whole thing.
So the question isn’t if I want him to fuck me. Obviously, I do.
It’s more when is he going to?
And will I even see it coming?
I shiver as we reach Galina’s Mercedes G-Wagon.
Yes, it's the bullet-proof model. Because of course it is with her two dads.
Back at Morvaine, Wren hangs downstairs talking to Jude, Theo and Lucia, who seems to have totally gotten over her crush on Jude, thank God. But I’m beat, so I head upstairs to get ready for bed.
I climb the stairs, realizing with a grin that I’m not still dwelling on my run-in with Kyle because my mind is too full of darkly alluring, sinfully hot fantasies involving Achilles.
Oozing out of the darkness. Stripping me bare and pushing my legs apart.
Taking me.
Fucking me.
Owning me.
But the second I open my door those thoughts evaporate. The heat that’s been humming through my veins turns to brittle ice and shatters.
Because scrawled in cherry-red lipstick across my mirror is a new message.
And this time, there’s no doubt if it’s just a locker room prank.
THE DEAD KNOW WHAT YOU DID, YELENA. THE DEAD DO NOT FORGET.
My heart lurches into my throat as I stumble back out of my room. I gasp for air, my face white as I whirl and go lurching downstairs to the common room.
But the mood has shifted from how I left it a minute ago. Everyone looks worried, glancing around nervously and talking in hushed, serious tones. Lucia looks up, her face pale as she meets my curious gaze.
“Lena,” she whispers, her eyes wide. “There’s been another one.”
I frown. “Another—”
“The Hawthorne Hollow police just announced the discovery of another body.”
Before I can even react, my phone buzzes. I pull it out of my pocket and stare at the screen as an inky darkness swirls inside me.
Achilles
Meet me tonight at The Garrison. Midnight.
Achilles
Don’t forget your safe word.
My throat tightens, and a heated ripple claws down my spine.
Achilles
You may find you’ll need it.
Dark need pulls at my core, tightening my nipples to points as heat blooms between my legs.
Me
Why?
I hold my breath, both terrified of and aching for the answer.
But I don’t have to hold it very long.
Achilles
Because tonight, I’m going to hunt you.
Achilles
I’m going to catch you and bring you to your knees.
Achilles
And then, Yelena, I’m going to bury my cock so deep in your pussy your cum and virgin blood will drip from my balls.
I stare at the screen, my mouth hanging open.
I type the word “why” before I realize what a dumb response that is and erase it. He responds instantly anyway, like he knew what I was about to ask.
Achilles
Because you’re mine, little prey. And tonight, you find out exactly what that means.