26. A Promise
26
A Promise
Jessica
I exit the bathroom to find Matt alone, lying prone in the center of the mattress.
I walk to the edge of the bed and ask, “Where’s Marieka?”
“Kaian came for her. He’ll keep her safe.”
I nod but say nothing, staring down at him a bit awkwardly until finally, he extends his hand to me and says, “Come here.”
I grip his hand in mine, allowing him to pull me across the bed, and then I tuck myself into his side, my head on his shoulder. His arm is a comforting weight around me. I slide my top leg over his thighs, my foot hooking around his calf, and after a fair amount of squirming I settle, sighing deeply at the familiarity around me.
We’re both quiet, lost in our own thoughts. The eerie, echoing silence is once again playing in time with the beating of his heart in my ear.
I let the silence drag out, and then, after a few long minutes, I ask, “What are you thinking about?” He says nothing. I crane my head around so I can see his face, squinting at his smiling lips and his closed eyes and mutter, “You better not say my fucking sweet pussy.”
He laughs, a deep belly one that vibrates in his chest, and I’m suddenly enveloped by a comforting warmth that has me laughing with him.
Slowly, our laughter dies, but the warm feeling remains, and then he says, “I mean, always your sweet pussy. But this time, I was literally thinking about nothing.”
I nod as I reply, “Same. Nothing seems good right now.”
We fall back into that comfortable silence. I close my eyes as his fingers stroke lightly over my forehead, giving myself this reprieve to slip into the nothing where the dark can’t touch me.
I doze a bit, but then I’m roused by his movement jostling me, and I’m unceremoniously dumped onto the mattress as he suddenly rolls toward me.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I sputter, annoyed that he took away my comfortable pillow.
He settles on his side facing me, his expression serious as he says, “Sorry, sugar. But our time to think about nothing is over. It was either I make a move right then or we continue to sit here, wasting valuable time.”
I frown, knowing he’s right but also wanting to sulk.
He moves closer so mere inches separate us, and then he reaches down, pulling my leg back up over him and yanking me so there’s no space between us. He wedges his bottom arm under my head so I’m pillowed on his bicep, but he’s still able to look me in the eyes. I pull my hands in, tucking myself into the cocoon as his free hand gently pushes the hair back from my face. His eyes search mine, the silence dragging out until finally, I whisper, “What are you looking for?”
“The answers.”
I snort, rolling my eyes a bit as I respond, “Good fucking luck finding any answers there.”
He smiles, his eyes warming as he says, “You are the answer.” I swat at his chest, rolling my eyes a bit more forcefully as I snort a little more loudly. He chuckles but remains unflinching as he says, “You’re my answer.”
Suddenly, my eyes burn, and I squeeze them shut, a sudden well of emotion burning in my chest and rising up my throat. I cough as I attempt to keep it down. I’ve never considered myself to be much of a crybaby, but the events of the last six months have proven I tend to leak under long periods of stress and anxiety.
“Look at me.”
I shake my head, squeezing my eyes tighter. I push at his chest in an attempt to escape, but he uses both arms to pull me tighter, his forehead pressed against mine. I open my eyes, and he’s so close that his two eyes blend into one, the pale green burning with every emotion I could ever fathom.
Finally, I ask, “How much time do we have?”
He eases his grip on me, putting a bit more distance between us, and his one eye becomes two as he replies, “If I had to guess, probably tomorrow evening.”
“And there’s no chance they won’t come for you?”
He shakes his head. “Given the circumstances, the odds of them just walking away are pretty much nil. So, the real question is whether or not other people will show up.”
“Who else has a stake in it?”
He laughs bitterly and then answers, “That list is long. Matteo was a pretty big shit in the game. He was also the eldest heir in that family, and his younger brother is more of a party animal than murderous animal, so they really have no choice. There were some other lower-level players who were fodder in the slaughter, but that doesn’t mean they’re just going to go quietly, either.”
“Are you saying you’re going to die?”
He stiffens, frowning as he says firmly, “No. At least, I fucking hope not.”
“But it’s a possibility.”
“Dying is a possibility regardless of multiple people wanting me dead.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better,” I say sullenly.
He sighs, shrugging and then shaking his head. “I don’t think there’s anything I can say to make you feel better. I’m not going to lie to you, and I’m not going to sugarcoat anything.”
“I know.”
“Do you?”
I glare at him and then spit out, “Yes, I fucking know.”
“We have help coming,” he whispers. “I won’t be in there entirely alone, but I need you to promise me something.”
“Anything,” I say easily. “You know I’ll do anything you ask.”
“You’re not going to like it.”
Now I laugh as I say, “Nothing new there, but I promise, nonetheless.”
“When the time comes where you’re able to escape,” he says. “I need you to promise me that you’ll go.”
I frown, all laughter leaving me as I shake my head and whisper, “I can’t.”
“You must. You must get out of there so I’ll know you’re safe.”
I shake my head almost violently, that low sob once again stuck in my throat as I whimper, unable to just do what he wants.
He pulls away from me, his hands gripping my head, forcing me to look at him. In a commanding voice I’ve never heard before, he says, “You will. You will promise me, and you will do it. Do you hear me?”
I close my mouth, pressing my lips together tightly, shaking my head in his hands. He gives me a little shake as he whisper-shouts, “Yes. Promise me.”
The sob breaks free, and I gasp, “And leave you behind?”
“Yes,” he replies more calmly. “I can take care of myself.”
“And how is it you suggest I escape?”
“I don’t know for sure, but you’ll know when the time is upon us and you will turn and you will leave without even looking back.”
Tears stream from my eyes now, running along my nose into my hairline, onto his arm, and I know that the fuss I’m putting up is all for naught because there really isn’t any other choice. But I don’t want to. I don’t want to take the chance that I leave him behind only for him to die when I’d sooner stay behind and die with him.
He’s quiet now, and I take a shuddering breath in, nodding and swallowing the lump in my throat as I meet his eyes again.
“You have to say the words, sugar. I need to hear them.”
I let loose one final sob and a shaky inhalation through my nose, and then I exhale. “I promise.”