Epilogue
AMAL
Three Months Later
All those months away, I didn’t realize how much I missed Daniel and Allegra until I hugged them. Even though I spoke with my brother weekly, I found myself holding him so tight, so grateful for him. Grateful for both of them.
Allegra is putting the last of the baby’s breath in my hair which she styled in a wild up do with curls cascading down over my shoulders haphazardly.
It looks like it’s just swept up, but I have about a pound of hairspray holding it together.
She then secures the feather light veil to the back using more bobby pins than I can count.
I dot pink lip gloss on. I threw out all my reds because I can’t stand anything red anymore, and we step back to look at my reflection in the full-length mirror.
“Wow,” Allegra says. “You look just like your mom.”
I’m dressed in an elegant white dress with a short train and a veil that touches the floor.
It’s my something new. My shoes are borrowed from Allegra, a pair of satin pumps from an Italian designer.
The blue is a ribbon my mom had saved from a present she’d received when Daniel was born.
It’s wrapped around my wrist like a bracelet.
My something old is a pair of pearl earrings Malek had given my mother on the day of their wedding.
My mother was a very beautiful woman. Her beauty was her best quality according to Malek, and he enjoyed showing her off and showing off to her with expensive presents.
He treated her like a very expensive piece of art, and I guess she took it in place of love to save herself. Or maybe to protect me.
Ever since I found the diary and learned the truth about myself, I’ve wondered about Malek marrying my mother. She’d have been two months pregnant with me. She’d always told me I was premature. She could have concealed the pregnancy from him.
This is where things get a little tricky. I hate Malek for what he did to Allegra. To her family. But he never hurt me or Daniel. Yes, he was ready to marry me off to a man old enough to be my father for his own gain but if he’d known I wasn’t his, surely, he’d have treated me worse, wouldn’t he?
Did he know all along that my mother was already pregnant when he married her? I will never know.
I search my reflection for features not belonging to my mother. For hints of the man who fathered me.
“She’d have been proud of you,” Allegra says.
“You think so?” I ask. Allegra knows the truth about Malek not being my father, but she doesn’t know the rest of it. I can’t stomach the idea of telling that story to anyone.
“I know so.”
A knock comes on the door. “Ready?” asks Cassian from just outside it.
Allegra raises her eyebrows. I nod and she goes to open the door to let Cassian in. She takes Seth from him and quietly slips out to leave us alone.
He looks me over. “You look beautiful,” he says.
“Thanks.”
There’s a moment I think I should fill but don’t know what to say.
“Amal,” he says, coming toward me but keeping enough space between us so he’s not crowding me. I look up at him. “You should have come to me, but I understand why you didn’t. I want to make sure you know I’d never hurt you or your brother. I want to be very clear on that.”
I don’t know what to say and find myself trying to swallow down a lump in my throat.
“That’s all I’m going to say about it. Do you understand?”
I nod.
“Good. Besides, I hear you’re a pretty good shot and I should stay on your good side. You ready to marry my brother for a second time? Now that you actually have the choice?”
“I’d marry him a hundred times over,” I say.
He holds out his hand, and I slip mine into it. He tucks my arm into his because he’s going to walk me down the aisle. His idea. “That’s good to hear because he’s been crazy about you for a long time.”
“Thank you, Cassian,” I say before we walk out the door. “Thank you for being there and for all of it. I was wrong not to trust you.”
He nods. “We’re good now, Amal. And Jet’s impatient as ever. Insisted on bringing that damn dog too.”
With a laugh we walk out the door and the organist starts a sort of wedding march as soon as we appear at the end of what was once a proper church aisle and is now Cassian’s house.
And there, standing at the end, is my beautiful husband looking as handsome as ever, grinning a stupid grin like he’s so happy to see me. So damn happy.
And we are.