Chapter Four
Ice stood alone at the bar, watching Scars and Zoe dancing. Keira was held between them, and the little family of three looked so utterly happy, so alight with love and trust and care, that Ice felt himself smiling faintly at the sight. OK, yeah, he might be a prick when it came to relationships, but Scars had it all figured out. Even Ice could be happy about that much.
He downed the rest of his Coke, then glanced around the restaurant, deliberately not catching anyone’s eye; he was a silent and brooding bastard at the best of times, and he’d been even more so since he’d told Wolf to fuck himself and stormed out of the last club meeting. That had been two weeks ago now, and his MC brothers still didn’t seem to know what to do around him.
Sliding his cold gaze to the floor-to-ceiling windows, he found himself admiring the incredible landscape, even softening a bit at its shining beauty. He’d never been to Open Skies Ranch before, though of course he’d heard of it, and he had to admit that it was a truly gorgeous place for a wedding, and a honeymoon. Scars and Zoe would be staying for the weekend, alone for just for a couple of days, and then it was back to normal life on Monday.
Ice’s heart sank at that. Normally, he’d be thrilled to get back to work as the official bouncer at Satan’s Bar – it paid him a good salary, and when combined with his private personal training clients, he earned more than enough to support his life – but instead he was dreading everything that was coming after this weekend.
“Hey, man.”
Ice jumped a bit at the voice behind him, shocked that Wolf had actually managed to sneak up without him noticing, while he stood staring out the window. It was the clearest sign that Ice wasn’t at anything like his best: he was distracted to the point of carelessness, and right now, he needed to be sharp and smart.
With a sigh of impatience at the seemingly never-ending list of his own shortcomings and failings, Ice turned to look at his President. “Wolf.”
The man standing there was as tall as Ice, just as strong and broad, just as hardened. Wolf Connor was also one of the toughest sons-of-bitches that Ice had ever known – what the man lacked in formal education, he more than made up for in street smarts, and Ice had come to respect the brain under that mop of permanently-tousled dark hair.
Wolf’s wolf-gray eyes bore into Ice now seeing below the surface, looking all the way into Ice’s soul, and as always, Ice knew that the other man was seeing far more than he was letting on. Wolf’s instincts were definitely primal, and he was rarely wrong when it came to making calls based on human behavior…. and despite knowing all of that , Ice still didn’t trust or support Wolf’s decision to gallivant off to Utah all alone.
“We need to talk,” Wolf said in his usual ‘cut-through-the-bullshit’ tone. They might be standing in the middle of a wedding reception, but Wolf wasn’t going to be making small talk about any of that , despite the bride being his oldest friend and the groom being his right-hand man in the MC. “Outside.”
Ice nodded, followed his President. When they stepped out into the November chill, they paused for a few seconds despite themselves, struck yet again by the incredible views. No matter how long they lived in Denver, or how many times they looked at the mountains, their awe at the scale and size of the Rockies never, ever abated.
“So.” Wolf said, narrowing his eyes at his chief Enforcer. “We need to sort out shit between us, and we need to fuckin’ do it now . I’m leavin’ day after tomorrow for Utah, and I’d prefer to do that with you and me on the same page.”
“But –” Ice began to protest, but Wolf cut him off.
“”No fuckin’ ‘but’s,” Wolf growled. “I’m gonna talk, you’re gonna listen, and then you get your turn. But I’m still fuckin’ President around here, Johansson, and so I get to say what’s on my mind first. Clear?”
“Yeah. Sorry.”
“OK.” Wolf took a deep breath. “Now, I know that you ain’t thrilled about me goin’ to the Highway Hellions and workin’ with Viper Grant, helpin’ him to take all the work and contracts from Dawson Kinney and The Blood Crew. And if I’m bein’ honest with you, man, I ain’t thrilled about it. I hate that fuckin’ snake like snake poison, and I don’t trust him. But…” He stared hard at Ice. “ But I love Zee and you guys and their women more than I hate that asshole. This is about everyone that I care about, about keepin’ them safe. It ain’t about advancin’ Viper’s MC business interests and increasin’ his personal bank balance. You get me?”
Ice nodded. He knew all of this.
“We’re in agreement so far,” Wolf said. “You see the need for what I’m doin’.”
“Yeah.”
“So, the problem ain’t so much what I’m doin,” Wolf continued. “It’s that I’m doin’ it alone . Specifically, that I’m doin’ it without you .”
Ice nodded tightly.
“Well, all I can say about that is: fuckin’ get over yourself, man.”
Ice blinked. He hadn’t been expecting that .
“You think that without you, I’m lost? I can’t handle it on my own, need you to hold my hand over in Utah?”
“N – no,” Ice stammered, then shut up again at Wolf’s thunderous glare.
“No,” Wolf said firmly. “Now, what I do need is an Enforcer here, keepin’ an eye on everythin’ and everyone that I care about. You know this, but you keep refusin’ to see that I’m right, so here I am, havin’ to explain myself to you again . That’s fine, that’s your call, man, so you carry on bitchin’ and sulkin’, if it makes you happy. But it won’t change my mind a goddamn bit – I’m trustin’ you and you need to trust me.” He glared at Ice. “And I’m leavin’ on Monday no matter how you feel about it, so the sooner you get with this new reality, the better. I can leave with us on great terms or shit ones… your call, man. What are you gonna do?”
Ice stared at Wolf, knew that the battle was lost, that it had been lost ages ago. Wolf was going, that was that, and Ice couldn’t protest any more than he already had. Time had run out, and he’d wasted it by staying stuck on this one point, his demand for Wolf to take him to Utah like some kind of personal bodyguard. Meanwhile, Wolf and Scars had spent the past couple of weeks agreeing on everything to do with The Road Devils, making plans, setting up safety nets… and Ice had just opted out. Wolf was right, he’d been sulking and whining, he’d been part of all the problems and exactly zero of the solutions. He’d been an utter coward, all over the goddamn place.
With his MC brothers… and with Vix too. He had some serious amends to make. Starting with the glowering man in front of him.
Ice cleared his throat. “I – I’ll do what you want, Wolf… I just want to say one last thing. If I can.”
“Shoot.”
He looked away from Wolf’s intense stare, turned his gaze to the brilliant autumn colors. “I’m so worried that I can barely fucking sleep.”
Wolf cocked his head at the other man’s tone. It wasn’t angry or confrontational, for a change; instead, it was soft, almost…
Scared? Ice Johansson scared of somethin'?
“OK,” Wolf said, took a deep breath, took his own anger down several notches. “OK, man. What are you worried about that I’m missin’?”
“Losing someone.” Ice hesitated, then ploughed on. “Someone else .”
Wolf stayed silent, waiting for Ice to say more. He knew that if he spoke now, Ice would clam right up, retreat back into that unearthly cold and calm, and Wolf very much wanted to have this conversation with his Enforcer… because he couldn’t have it properly with anyone else.
Oh, sure, he and Scars had talked at length about the never-ending shit storm that began with Dawson Kinney starting a splinter MC, carried on with Keira’s asshole murderous father, and Jo’s asshole murderous ex, and fucking asshole murderous cult leader Gideon and Crusher Alcott, and which was now rolling merrily on with Crusher’s MC and Viper Grant.
But they rarely – like never – talked about their profound loss, the real one that still felt like a body blow to Wolf. He was a man who wasn’t shaken by much, but he’d been shaken to his core by recent events.
His golden eyes were still open, even as his body turned cold in a pool of his own blood .
“I mean…” Ice cleared his throat again. “If we’re looking at Enforcers, it’s just me and Cain now from the old crew. The twins are gone and it’s for a happy reason, and Holt’s stepping up and he’s really good, but still. Me and Cain and the twins were – we were seamless . You know? After all those years together, we didn’t even have to talk about what we were doing, we all just knew each other’s thoughts and reactions. It saved us, more times than I can count.” He sucked in a deep breath, and Wolf knew what was coming next. “And – and Rebel. What happened to Rebel. I can’t get past it, and I feel like I should have stopped it. I feel like – like I’ve lost control of everything , like I’ve had no way to protect any of us for the past few years, and I just can’t get a handle on any fucking situation at all, and now I have even less of a chance of doing that with the twins out of the picture. And if you go to Utah, I feel like…” He stopped, unsure how to finish that sentence.
“You feel like what?” Wolf asked quietly, shocked to his core that Ice had put so many words together, all in a row, all at once. “Tell me.”
“Oh, shit.” Ice looked straight at Wolf, decided that he had nothing to lose anymore, and to just come straight out and say it. “I feel like we’re going to lose you too. I’m worried about letting you out of my sight, because – because then we’ll never see you again, and if I could have been there and maybe had your back, then I’ll – I’ll never forgive myself. And I’ll never sleep again, I swear.”
Wolf and Ice stared at each other; they were both men of very, very few words normally, but they both had to take a few steps out of their reticent natures. There were things that had to be said, and time was running out to say them.
“OK,” Wolf said. “I hear you, and if I’m bein’ open with you, man, I’m worried about that myself.”
“You are?”
“Sure.” Wolf shrugged. “I have my doubts about Viper’s motivations for gettin’ me on his turf.”
“You don’t think he’s interested in taking all the Blood Crew work?”
“Honestly? I ain’t convinced that’s all he wants.”
“So…” Ice was thunderstruck, then wondered why the hell it hadn’t occurred to him that he and Wolf were probably on the same page. They so often were, when Ice thought about it. “So… you think it’s a trap?”
“I don’t know. I think it’s a good fuckin’ possibility.”
“But you’re going anyway.” It wasn’t a question.
“I am, for all the reasons that I already mentioned. I figure if I’m there, I can at least keep an eye on Viper, even if I’m bein’ watched just as closely.” Wolf gave him a small grin. “But me and Scars, King and Denton have some extra security in place. Another police officer got involved too.”
Ice looked up sharply. “Who’s that?”
“A buddy of Denton’s from the gang unit – turns out, his specialty is MC’s in Utah, so he knows a hell of a lot more about Viper than we do. He shared some inside information about The Hellions’ financial situation and it ain’t good.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that Crusher ran that club into the ground financially, left Viper with a fuckin’ mess. I think that he’s pretty damn desperate to bring in some cash fast… and I can help him do that. No sense killin’ me when I can fatten up the coffers, huh? I suspect he’ll hurt me as soon as he’s able, but that won’t be for a good while. We got some time, man.”
Ice could fucking kick himself for acting like a petulant teenager, when he should have been working with Salt Lake City police officer Travis Denton and his friend, Matt ‘King’ Kingston, and his Prez and Veep to shore up Wolf’s safety.
“But you do think that Viper might want to hurt you,” Ice said flatly. “Like hurt you.”
“He might.” Wolf broke eye contact now, looked up at the mountains. “This still might partly be about The Road Devils coverin’ up Jo’s husband’s murder – the asshole was on the Highway Hellions’ payroll, after all – and bein’ mixed-up with Briley, and then involved in Crusher’s death. Crusher hated us for leavin’ the MC criminal world, too, remember, so I’d bet that Viper feels the same way. This might be personal for him, alongside a money-makin’ windfall.”
“I guess so. Yeah.” Ice stared at the ground, trying to determine if he felt better or worse after talking to Wolf; he decided that on the whole, he felt way worse. He felt like he was throwing Wolf to the wolves, and nothing about that was going to sit right with him, no matter how many police officers were involved. “So what have you guys put in place with King and Denton and his friend?”
“It’s too much to get into now, and I want to have a dance with the bride before she and her husband head off to the cabin for their honeymoon,” Wolf said crisply. “Scars will fill the boys in on Monday, since it involves all of you. You especially, Ice, so you need to get your head out of your ass and step up. Nothin’ works without your skills, as I’m sure I don’t need to tell you.”
“Got it,” Ice said, chastised and chastened. “But you feel like it’s all enough? Like – enough to keep you safe?”
“I sure as hell hope so,” Wolf said, turning back to Open Skies, clearly indicating that this conversation was over for him. “I’ve got zero interest in lettin’ Viper Grant get the best of me.”
“Wolf?”
Something in Ice’s voice stopped Wolf in his tracks, and he turned back. “Yeah?”
“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I’ll step up now, I swear it to you. I – I’ve really not been at my best the past couple of weeks. Probably longer, to be fair, but I really dropped the ball two weeks ago, and I just haven’t pulled my shit together.”
Wolf studied Ice’s face, saw the dark shadows under his troubled eyes, then he smiled. It was one of those smiles that Wolf rarely gave anyone besides Zoe and Keira, and as always, Ice was surprised at how it made ten years drop off his President’s face.
“Yeah, well.” Wolf clapped Ice on his muscled shoulder. “You can deal with that on Monday too, huh?”
“‘That’?” Ice asked, bewildered. “ What that?”
“Not ‘what’,” Wolf said. “‘Who’.”
“Who?” Ice echoed, totally lost. “ Who who?”
“Jesus, are you turning into a goddamn owl, Johansson?” Wolf shook his head in mock exasperation. “ Vixen , that’s who.”
“I – I don’t –” Ice stammered, feeling once again that he was letting down the Arctic calm of his name. “I’m not – she isn’t –”
“Save it,” Wolf said brusquely. “I ain’t stupid and I ain’t blind. You owe that girl a serious fuckin’ apology, and you know it. It ain’t her fault that I told you no.”
Ice sighed, once again bowing to Wolf’s almost telepathic and eerie knowledge of everything . “Yeah.”
“So!” Wolf said, opening the door to the hotel reception area. “Enjoy this weekend, man, because come Monday, you’re gonna say sorry to your MC brothers, Scars especially, and Denton, and King – and the beautiful Vixen. That’s one hell of an apology tour you’re gonna embark on.”
“Ain’t that the truth,” Ice said, following Wolf back inside. “You think that Keira might draw me a banner?”
“Sure she would,” Wolf said cheerfully. “As long as her stuffed rabbit can be the mascot.”